Samara O'Shea > Quotes

“If you tolerate disrespectful behavior it will get worse over time.”
― Samara O'Shea, Loves Me... Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love

“English is curvaceous, complex, and beautiful. Fluent and fierce. She is the lover you will always adore but will never fully know because there’s too much to know. She is a true seductress—devious and overt, offering endless possibilities.”
― Samara O'Shea, For the Love of Letters: A 21st-Century Guide to the Art of Letter Writing

“A few years ago I was involved with a man and when we stopped seeing each other I worried about what it meant to him. Will he remember me the way I remember him? Did I make a lasting impression on him the way he did on me? At some point I thought about that little sentence describing one woman’s passion vs. a man’s dalliance and seeing how well her passion served her in other ways, and I chose not to care. I don’t care what he did or didn’t feel. What he does or doesn’t remember. I am a person and I count. It meant something to me, therefore it meant something. I will now take my passion and do what I damn well please. How extraordinary to be the passionate one.”
― Samara O'Shea, Loves Me... Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love

“The day you stop criticizing other people is the day you have officially stopped criticizing yourself. When you no longer feel the need to compare, it means you've stopped using other people as a litmus test for your own self-worth.”
― Samara O'Shea, Loves Me... Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love

“If you want to be exclusive with someone and he gives you the runaround, honor your intentions and walk away (unless your goal isn't to be with the guy but rather to write a song, screenplay, or book. If that's it--you're on the right track). Continue searching for a man who wants what you want.”
― Samara O'Shea, Loves Me... Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love

“There are two times in life—when you’re madly in love and when your heart is good and broken—that you’ll inadvertently pay more attention to the words around you.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“Too often, we get our sense of self from other people and grant them far too much power over how we feel.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“When people compliment you, by all means say thank you. Politeness is recognizing that someone has extended a kindness to you. In your own mind, however, remind yourself that someone already confirmed that the dress was cute; you did--when you bought it. Part of the reason taking things personally is best avoided is because we can never know the source of the comment.”
― Samara O'Shea, Loves Me... Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love

“Copy down the quotes that move you, because they, in addition to or in lieu of your own words, will testify to how you saw the world at a certain age.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“If you can't find happiness--because your state of affairs doesn't lend to it--seek contentment; stillness in the storm. This doesn't mean don't go after the things you want. But remember personal challenges--those experiences that satisfy us on the inside-- are where we find the most fulfillment. If you don't like your base level, address it within rather than continuing to expect emotional salvation from all things without.”
― Samara O'Shea, Loves Me... Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love

“You don't have to expect perfection of any man, but certainly expect a strong sense of "We're in this together" to know if the relationship is on solid ground.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“We are a society that values outward proof more than inward gratification.”
― Samara O'Shea, Loves Me... Not: How to Survive (and Thrive!) in the Face of Unrequited Love

“Adolescent philosophies and fears sit on the page and mock me from the past. They don’t mock in a mean way but rather in an Oh, honey, you have so much to learn way.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“it made me wonder how much of her not believing in God was not believing in human beings.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“Don't lie. Its amazing how naturally lying comes to us, isn't it? No one ever has to teach us. We spill juice on the carpet and Mommy says, "Did you do that?" And then it hits us, Oh, I know. I'll just tell her I didn't do it! She'll be none the wiser. But she is, of course, the wiser, and she shouts vehemently at us not to lie anymore. And then our teachers tell us not to lie. Then our friends say it's okay to lie to the authorities but not to lie to them. Then in every romantic relationship we choose to indulge, it'll be stated over and over, "Be honest! Just tell me how you feel." It's strange, though, that amidst all those "don't lie" lessons, no one ever tells you the one person you will end up lying to the most often and the one person you really shouldn't be lying to at all is yourself.
You'll tell yourself you like a job when you don't. You'll tell yourself you're in love with someone when you aren't. You'll tell yourself you aren't attracted to a person when you are. You'll tell yourself you don't really want to go after that dream job for reasons a, b, and c, but in truth you put it off because you're terrified. Basically, it's because that dream job and that new relationship would be too tough. Too complicated. You'll stick with your current job and an uninspired relationship because they're easy. They're convenient.
I've decided that our days aren't meant to be convenient. If you wake up and find that your life is really convenient, I suggest running (not walking) to the next challenge. Life is meant to be rewarding, and reward only comes from hard work that you want to be doing. The work can be physical, mental, or emotional. It can entail an occupation, a relationship, or a project such as building your son a tree house. You have to find those things that are worthy of your pursuit, and it starts by being honest with yourself.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“forgiveness is difficult. If it were easy, then there would be no lessons learned or personal transformation taking place.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“Pull out your journal and be brutally, painfully, overwhelmingly, and cathartically honest with yourself. You don’t have to start being that honest with everyone else just yet, but you will find in being honest with yourself, it comes much more naturally to be honest and kind to others.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“Now the beneficiary of your love is out of the equation, and you’re left alone with the one person you’d really rather not deal with—yourself. And you have to get to know yourself all over again without your beloved as a distraction. At this low point, creativity, excessive exercise, and ice cream become tantamount to survival.”
― Samara O'Shea, Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits

“To insist on a certain outcome--one outcome--is to deny yourself the surprise experiences life was going to give you--the things you didn't know you wanted until they came knocking and you were daring enough to let them in. By tying yourself to an ending, you're making arrangements to be miserable if you don't get exactly what you want. Or worse, you get exactly what you want and it doesn't make you as supremely happy as you thought it was going to.”
― Samara O'Shea