Deepak Malhotra > Quotes

“human creativity in the arts, and human innovation in technology—are intimately related. Every advancement in technology, including military technology, remains, foremost, a feat of imagination. This is where humans excel.”
― Deepak Malhotra, The Peacemaker's Code

“Society cannot afford to forget the lessons of the past—nor to learn the wrong lessons. But there is a third danger—and it is the greatest threat of all, if only because it is the least well recognized. Humanity can no longer afford to have only a handful of its citizens and leaders understand the lessons of history. We cannot count on a select few to be the caretakers of knowledge. The elite guardians of wisdom will be rendered useless if the masses are incapable of understanding their language, unable to appreciate their concerns, or uninterested even in considering their advice. This danger is not new, but it is always magnified during those times when a population is empowered at a faster rate than it is educated. And it is worst in societies where the value of any idea is measured only after it is filtered through the lens of politics, partisanship, or ideology. Of the diabolically complicated Schleswig-Holstein affair—as pertained to Denmark and Prussia in the mid-19th century—Lord Palmerston is said to have remarked: “Only three people have ever really understood the Schleswig-Holstein business—the Prince Consort, who is dead, a German professor, who has gone mad, and I, who have forgotten all about it.” We can no longer rely only on princes, professors, and lords to understand the affairs of the world. The professors and Palmerstons of the world must educate—and hence enable—the rest. And they must do it soon. The time will come when the masses no longer listen to their advice—when expertise is unrecognizable because the gulf between those who know and those who don’t is too wide to bridge. That day is almost upon us.”
― Deepak Malhotra, The Peacemaker's Code

“Empathy expands the set of options you have for resolving the conflict. The better you understand the other side’s perspective, the more likely you are to find a solution”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Asking people to forget the past is futile, but it is sometimes possible to help them find more value-creating ways to apply the lessons of the past.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Not every negotiation should end with a deal. If the best you have to offer the other side is worse than their alternatives, not reaching a deal is the right outcome.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“If you don’t have a seat at the table, you might influence deal makers by creating value outside of the deal, or by offering to help sell or implement the current deal.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“In complex deals and protracted conflicts, especially if hostage taking is a concern, a sufficient consensus approach can be more appropriate than seeking unanimity.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Early actions can take on heightened significance. Look for low-cost opportunities to powerfully influence the frame and to establish the appropriate expectations and precedents for the relationship.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“There is almost always a trade-off between maintaining strategic flexibility and safeguarding credibility.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Never let fear dictate your response to the problems of human interaction.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Preserve forward momentum. Before using tactics to gain advantage, consider: how will this affect our ability to negotiate productively in the future?”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Commitment to a rigid process is not always possible or advisable. If the process is flexible, make sure all parties understand the degree to which there is commitment.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Ambiguous or incomplete agreements might be parasitic, meeting at-the-table interests at the expense of other stakeholders”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Parties can get bogged down with process concerns when there is inadequate preparation, an unrealistic goal of crafting the perfect process, or an excessive desire for strategic flexibility.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“In negotiations of all kinds, the greater your capacity for empathy—the more carefully you try to understand all of the other party’s motivations, interests, and constraints—the more options you tend to have for potentially resolving the dispute or deadlock. In other words, when you empathize, you are not doing others a favor, you are doing yourself a favor.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Have a process strategy: how will you get from where you are today to where you want to be? Consider the factors that influence whether, when, and how substantive negotiations will occur.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Avoid picking a winning strategy earlier than is necessary. Keep options open and be prepared—psychologically, organizationally, and politically—to change course.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“To put it simply: The safer you make it for the other party to tell you the truth, the more likely they are to do so.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“If the existing frame is disadvantageous, seek to reframe as soon as possible.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“If crises are a test of leadership, it is not because they show us who has the strength to fight and win, but because they reveal who has the wisdom and courage to do so without sacrificing their vision for the future.”
― Deepak Malhotra, The Peacemaker's Code

“The good news is, there is light at the end of the tunnel. The bad news is, there is no tunnel. SHIMON PERES”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Competing perspectives can be bridged if (a) one side can adopt the other’s frame without sacrificing their ability to articulate key demands, or (b) both sides can agree to a new frame that gives neither an advantage.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Sometimes the best response to a deep-rooted perspective is to yield to it: understand it, adopt it, and repurpose it to advance your position.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Work the whole body. Consider all the barriers, approach the problem from all directions, and use all the levers at your disposal.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Protracted conflicts cannot be resolved without genuine efforts to understand the deep-seated forces that legitimize each side’s perspective and behavior.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Strategic ambiguity can help parties initiate relationships when there is insufficient trust for full commitment, but where being explicitly noncommittal is unacceptable.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Even if you cannot influence the process, seek to get as much clarity and commitment on it as possible.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“Yielding to the other party’s frame or perspective might enhance your leverage.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts

“The Hamilton Real Estate case is a relatively simple negotiation: two parties (a buyer and a seller) are negotiating over one issue (price). Within this framework, we cover all of the following aspects of negotiating: preparing to negotiate, avoiding common negotiator mistakes, deciding whether to make the first offer, responding to the other side’s offers, structuring your initial offer, finding out how far you can push the other side, haggling effectively, claiming maximum value without sacrificing the relationship, and managing your own satisfaction.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiation Genius: How to Overcome Obstacles and Achieve Brilliant Results at the Bargaining Table and Beyond

“If a destructive pattern is entrenched, label your future concessions.”
― Deepak Malhotra, Negotiating the Impossible: How to Break Deadlocks and Resolve Ugly Conflicts