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“God knew the African woman was going to have a very, very hard life. That is why He gave her skin as tough as Mother Earth herself. He gave her that tough, timeless skin so that her woes would not be written all over her face, so that her face would not be a map to her torn and tattered heart.”
― Beauty's Gift
― Beauty's Gift
“In such a people world, filled with a real, immediate, and tangible sense of belongingness, did I spend the earliest years of my life. I was not only wanted, I was loved. I was cherished.
The adults in my world, no doubt, had their cares and their sorrows. But childhood, by its very nature, is a magic-filled world, egocentric, wonderfully carefree, and innocent. Mine was all these things and more.”
― To My Children's Children
The adults in my world, no doubt, had their cares and their sorrows. But childhood, by its very nature, is a magic-filled world, egocentric, wonderfully carefree, and innocent. Mine was all these things and more.”
― To My Children's Children
“Traffic is light as she leaves Mowbray. So is her heart. Light. Soon. Soon, she will be home. Strange how she was able to bear it -- bear being away. Until now. With a day to go, it has suddenly become unbearable. Since that party on Saturday night. Smashing send-off these lovely people gave her. Really smashing. So, why is she feeling so blue? Ah, well, she thinks to herself, I've always had a problem, saying goodbye.
She hardly has a moment to breathe through the day. So busy. Her very last day at this place she has called home these ten months past. Here at the university too, many people want to talk about her trip back home. If only they knew. If only they knew. Excited as she is about the prospect of seeing her family, of going home, seeing her friends, with all that ... still, saying goodbye is not easy. Never has been for her. That is what she's doing now. How she wishes everybody would just forget she was going back home. But no. People insist on saying goodbye, on giving her party after party. Therefore, she is forced to take leave of her friends, to acknowledge the pain of parting. Bitter sweet. How she wishes she were home already. But, of course, before that can happen, she has to say goodbye to all these dear, dear friends, these people of whom she has grown so fond. But perhaps she will come back. Of course, she will come back, one day. A not too far-away day too, that's for sure.
Yes, I can see how torn she must have felt. Excited and grieving. Happy and sad. At one and the same time. For the same, the very same, reason.”
― Mother to Mother
She hardly has a moment to breathe through the day. So busy. Her very last day at this place she has called home these ten months past. Here at the university too, many people want to talk about her trip back home. If only they knew. If only they knew. Excited as she is about the prospect of seeing her family, of going home, seeing her friends, with all that ... still, saying goodbye is not easy. Never has been for her. That is what she's doing now. How she wishes everybody would just forget she was going back home. But no. People insist on saying goodbye, on giving her party after party. Therefore, she is forced to take leave of her friends, to acknowledge the pain of parting. Bitter sweet. How she wishes she were home already. But, of course, before that can happen, she has to say goodbye to all these dear, dear friends, these people of whom she has grown so fond. But perhaps she will come back. Of course, she will come back, one day. A not too far-away day too, that's for sure.
Yes, I can see how torn she must have felt. Excited and grieving. Happy and sad. At one and the same time. For the same, the very same, reason.”
― Mother to Mother
“As far back as I can remember, there has always been a place to which I belonged with a certainty that nothing has been able to take from me. When I say place, that means less a geographical locality and more a group of people with whom I am connected and to whom I belong.”
― To My Children's Children
― To My Children's Children
“Central to the stories in which people featured, was the bond of love with the concomitants: duty, obedience, responsibility, honor, and orderliness; always orderliness. Like the seasons of the year, life was depicted full of cause and effect, predictability and order; connectedness and oneness.”
― To My Children's Children
― To My Children's Children
“I have this fear that if I ever believe that others wield power over my destiny, that I am so vulnerable, I might as well abdicate control of my life. For if I accept that, what is to stop me attributing to others all the setbacks I encounter? And once that happens, why would I do anything to get back on my own two feet? I would be virtually saying that it was beyond me to reclaim myself. I would be accepting absolute lack of control. And the Good Lord knows, I had very little control over my life as it was.
This fear, this need to go on believing I am in the driver's seat, may be the one ingredient in my make-up I will not find it easy to relinquish.
Therefore, with everything that I cherished taken, broken or out of reach, I resolved I would become self-sufficient. I would work hard. I would study. I would pull myself up by my bootstraps. Yes, even though I had still to acquire the boots.”
― Forced to Grow
This fear, this need to go on believing I am in the driver's seat, may be the one ingredient in my make-up I will not find it easy to relinquish.
Therefore, with everything that I cherished taken, broken or out of reach, I resolved I would become self-sufficient. I would work hard. I would study. I would pull myself up by my bootstraps. Yes, even though I had still to acquire the boots.”
― Forced to Grow
“It was natural given such clear teachings that I readily took the blame for the disastrous situation in which I found myself. My understanding of my religion offered me little solace. Indeed, by encouraging self-blame, it deprived me of a sense of justice...of being the injured one.”
― Forced to Grow
― Forced to Grow
“CWC (Church Women Concerned) enabled us as women in that part of South Africa, to see ourselves as ordinary citizens who found themselves in decidedly far from ordinary circumstances. In truth, some of us were not even considered citizens, strictly speaking: the African had, by this time, been completely deprived of that privilege.”
― Forced to Grow
― Forced to Grow
“The three children of fear and confusion - Cowardice, Corruption and Colonisation - had arrived.
Suddenly I did not know what I knew or who I knew.With the exception of my mother, my own
sisters and brothers, and my own children, I did not know anyone at this time.
Some neighbours sprouted horns that could gore me. Colleagues I had known and trusted grew tails. And friends had the Devil's own fire roaring, ready to fry me to brittle bone.
The pressure was fierce for people, everybody, to be involved in what was happening. But not all did so out of conviction.”
― Forced to Grow
Suddenly I did not know what I knew or who I knew.With the exception of my mother, my own
sisters and brothers, and my own children, I did not know anyone at this time.
Some neighbours sprouted horns that could gore me. Colleagues I had known and trusted grew tails. And friends had the Devil's own fire roaring, ready to fry me to brittle bone.
The pressure was fierce for people, everybody, to be involved in what was happening. But not all did so out of conviction.”
― Forced to Grow
“I came to see I was not just alone; I was free. Free of him. Free to be.
So many women's lives are hindered, hampered, and ruined by husbands who will not leave long after they have ceased to be husbands or fathers. Dead wearing a hat, these men actively and energetically visit untold woe on those they once had once. I was not thus afflicted I saw.”
― To My Children's Children
So many women's lives are hindered, hampered, and ruined by husbands who will not leave long after they have ceased to be husbands or fathers. Dead wearing a hat, these men actively and energetically visit untold woe on those they once had once. I was not thus afflicted I saw.”
― To My Children's Children
“Comment me reçoit-elle, ma fille ? Avec un visage aigri. Une crème anglaise de la veille qu'on aurait oubliée de ranger au frigo.”
― Mère à mère
― Mère à mère
“What I had not known was that perception of people like us did not quite coincide with our perception of who we were and what we were about.
More than anything, however, being a domestic servant did more to me than it did for me. It introduced me to the fundamentals of racism.”
― To My Children's Children
More than anything, however, being a domestic servant did more to me than it did for me. It introduced me to the fundamentals of racism.”
― To My Children's Children
“As might be surmised, CWC was multi-racial, multi-denominational, inclusive of all faiths. It had members from the Christian faith, the Islamic faith and the Jewish faith. The primary objective was to build bridges, to effect reconciliation, to attempt to live lives that projected well into the future, to a time when the laws that separated us according to skin colour would be no more.
It was a fond dream put forward as a testimony of faith. We truly believed the possibility existed for apartheid to be dismantled. Therefore, it behoved us to hasten the process by living the future now.”
― Forced to Grow
It was a fond dream put forward as a testimony of faith. We truly believed the possibility existed for apartheid to be dismantled. Therefore, it behoved us to hasten the process by living the future now.”
― Forced to Grow
“I came to see I was not just alone; I was free. Free of him. Free to be.
So many women's lives are hindered, hampered, and ruined by husbands who will not leave long after they have ceased to be husbands or fathers. Dead wearing a hat, these men actively and energetically visit untold woe on those they once had loved. I was not thus afflicted I saw.”
― To My Children's Children
So many women's lives are hindered, hampered, and ruined by husbands who will not leave long after they have ceased to be husbands or fathers. Dead wearing a hat, these men actively and energetically visit untold woe on those they once had loved. I was not thus afflicted I saw.”
― To My Children's Children
