Scott Meyer > Quotes

“That’s what makes reality reality, the fact that it just keeps being true no matter how much you argue with it.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“Occasionally, ignorance works in one’s favor.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“You need an education, practical experience, and certifications to practice medicine. To be president, all you need is the confidence of most of the people who bothered to vote.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“Sometimes, people will forget what kind of beverage is in their glass.
They’ll get it in their head that they have a glass of milk, when in fact it’s soda. If they take a drink without looking, the pleasant mouthful of pop will, for a moment, taste like the most messed-up mouthful of milk in history.”
― Scott Meyer

“Did you read one of his follow-up books?”
“No, I read the title, and a synopsis.”
“A synopsis.”
Martin shrugged. “Part of the synopsis.”
“Ah, yes,” Phillip said. “You’re an American.”
― Scott Meyer

“Brooke said, “Mom, did you know that the movie Frozen is really about pooping?” Mrs. Estabrook said, “What?” “Yeah,” Brooke continued. “See, Elsa makes ice. It just comes from her body naturally. She can’t help it. Sometimes it happens by accident. And her parents tell her to never let anyone see it happen.”
― Scott Meyer, The Authorities™

“Everybody lies to children, even their parents. The day a child realizes that is the day they start becoming an adult.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“Honor’s face turned bright red. Her knuckles went white. “Yes,” Honor said. “I understand, Mister Gibbons.” Gibbons nodded, making the common mistake of thinking that understanding and agreeing were the same thing.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“Besides, it ain’t an accident that gangs are made up of young men who have nothing. We value our lives little enough to risk them for a little money or a lot of fun.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“There are some mistakes you can never make up for. There are things you can do wrong you can never do right. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try. You should, but if it becomes clear that you won't succeed, drop it. To force the issue just tortures the people you wronged in the first place. Once you've made your feelings clear, it's better to leave and get on with your life.”
― Scott Meyer

“Martin knew that the computer had started out a tasteful shade of light gray, but as with all early Apple products, time had caused it to fade to a urine-like shade of yellow, a major problem for a computer that was often purchased as much as a fashion accessory as a business device.”
― Scott Meyer

“Good plans almost never contain the word somehow.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“Martin chuckled. “What makes more sense, that I ate some fast food, saved my trash, deliberately made a bunch of noise, then locked myself out of my own apartment just to come down here and lie to you for fun, or that I simply decided to walk a mile without shoes to eat at Boston Market?”
― Scott Meyer

“It’s a seed of doubt that will grow into a tree of trust, which I can sit beneath for shade or cut down for lumber as I see fit.”
― Scott Meyer

“Being a grown-up is like when someone trains their dog to sit with a weenie balanced on its nose until they give the dog permission to eat it, but you’re the one with the weenie on your nose and you’re the one withholding permission from yourself to eat it. Learning not to allow yourself to do all the dumb things you’d really like to do is part of what makes you an adult. So is learning not to snicker every time your father says weenie.”
― Scott Meyer

“One of the keys to persuading people is to get them to like you. One of the keys to getting people to like you is to behave like the kind of person your mark likes. People try to be likeable, so they tend to act like the kind of person they like, which is a mistake, because they invariably get this act wrong. That’s why acting exactly the way another person acts is a sure way to make that person dislike you.

Jimmy knew that the key to making someone like him was not to act how that person acts, but to act like that person thinks they act. In Gary’s case, that meant good-natured teasing that, unlike Gary’s “good-natured teasing,” was demonstrably good-natured and actually amusing to someone other than the person doing the teasing.”
― Scott Meyer

“Is cowardice a habit? And if it is, am I brave enough to break it?”
― Scott Meyer

“Besides, all of the spells that he could think of to use as a distraction were sort of a dead giveaway. He pictured himself saying, Ha, look at that, Brit, a six-foot pillar of flame here in your bedroom, for no reason. That’s something, isn’t it? Oh, and now it’s gone. So, how did you sleep?”
― Scott Meyer

“Whose Saturday, yours or hers?” Time travelers have to think about these things. “And which Brit?”
“The Younger, of course. And her Saturday, but at my place. I’m going to bring her to the rumpus room, show her my Fiero.”
Martin said, “That all sounds filthy.”
― Scott Meyer

“Gwen realized that on a certain level, she missed Jimmy. At least he’d been a good liar. Ida was panicking, and there’s a reason you never hear anyone say, “Luckily I panicked and did something really smart.”
― Scott Meyer

“That’s not a good enough answer.” “I know that better than anyone. But it is the answer regardless of whether or not you think it’s good enough. That’s what makes reality reality, the fact that it just keeps being true no matter how much you argue with it.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“What?” Martin shook his head. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!”
“Or you’re the dumbest man who’s ever heard it.”
― Scott Meyer

“Dragon pens?” Brewster asked.
Phillip said, “It’s a long story.”
Gary said, “Yeah. Some would say too long, too fragmented, and without clearly defined stakes...”
― Scott Meyer

“Bishop Galbraith comes out and tries to stick a magnet to the side of the church. It never sticks.”
“What does that prove?”
“That the church is covered in lead.”
“But anyone can see that. And besides, it doesn’t really prove anything! Magnets don’t stick to a normal church, either. That doesn’t mean they’re covered in lead.”
― Scott Meyer

“Do you have any loose teeth?” The hissing demon asked, “What doessss that have to do with anything?” “They can be a choking hazard during the procedure.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“No,” the banker said. “When you agreed to play a game without knowing the rules, you were doomed to lose.”
― Scott Meyer, That's Not Right

“Don’t trust, and never verify.” Roy said, “That doesn’t fill me with confidence.”
― Scott Meyer, Fight and Flight

“They never enjoyed returning to their office empty handed, but now they were returning home with their hands full of Jimmy, and it was just as unsavory as it sounded.”
― Scott Meyer

“When one is tricked into accepting a favor, it feels like a trick, not a favor.”
― Scott Meyer

“Ampyx scrunched his face and said, “Magic . . . it is . . . woman’s work.”
Martin just stared at him. Phillip piped up, “You do understand that this entire city was built with magic.”
“Yes,” Ampyx said. “By a woman, and it’s very impressive, in its way. I mean no disrespect to women. Someone has to do the magic, and they are very good at it, but it’s not fit work for a real man.”
“And what work is fit for a real man?” Phillip asked.
“Look around you, and see for yourself,” Ampyx said. “Guarding things, tending to the flowers, selling clothing, serving food. Some of us cut hair.”
“Manly work,” Phillip said.”
― Scott Meyer