Susan Juby > Quotes

“In the future if my mother tries to shame me with her disapproval, I will let her know in no uncertain terms that I reject her and all of her codependent baggage. I am Codependent No More.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“If the facts don't fit your theory, just find some new facts.”
― Susan Juby, Alice MacLeod, Realist at Last

“My heart kind of hurt when I looked at her. Not because I was in love, but because I could tell from looking at her that she didn't hate herself. Not only didn't she seem to hate herself, she barely seemed to think about herself. How fucking glorious must that be?”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“If you are alive and conscious, you are probably codependent.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“As you know, there are several classes of truth. There are the truths that pour out on confessional blogs and YouTube channels. There are the supposed truths exposed in gossip magazines and on reality television, which everyone knows are just lies in truth clothing. Then there are the truths that show themselves only under ideal circumstances: like when you are talking deep into the night with a friend and you tell each other things you would never say if your defenses weren't broken down by salty snacks, sugary beverages, darkness, and a flood of words. There are the truths found in books or films when some writer puts exactly the right words together and it's like their pen turned sword and pierced you right through the heart. Truths like those are rare and getting rarer.”
― Susan Juby, The Truth Commission

“I think we learn the truth about ourselves by telling it to someone else.”
― Susan Juby, The Truth Commission

“Maybe careers aren’t something you can really plan for. They just sort of happen, like brown eyes or flat feet. I took one of those career aptitude tests last year, and it showed that I should be a flight attendant or a seamstress. Not a fashion designer or anything, mind you, but a sweatshop worker. Apparently stewardesses and sweatshop workers and I enjoy a lot of the same interests and activities.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“This bastard was in a self-help program? For what? Square-jawed, cleft-chin sufferers? Handsome Bastards Anonymous?”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“I’ve always wanted to be self-sustaining and able to grow my own food. All I lack is land and skill.”
― Susan Juby

“I am not a people person.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“I think MacGregor might be a genius. Anyone so oblivious to the horror of the human world must be.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“I'm starting to think that pure truth is impossible, and that all narrators and all people are at least a little unreliable.”
― Susan Juby, The Truth Commission

“It’s not a good idea to let on about extreme happy feelings. People get ideas.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“If you start looking up, they start asking questions.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“It’s important to give people the benefit of the doubt even if they don’t deserve it.”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“I may never recover. It was like an out-of-body experience. I’m an alien trying on human rituals.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“She is, like anyone worth knowing, many things at once.”
― Susan Juby, The Truth Commission

“When you tell a story, you shape the truth.”
― Susan Juby, The Truth Commission

“Not being a big one for having friends, I had no idea what I was going to do with Aubrey, you know, to entertain him.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“The old man kept going about how he could never keep her home, how she loved to roam. He said she should have been a sheep in the foothills of Scotland. Now if that wasn't a load of shit I don't know what is. I'll tell you why that sheep roamed. The fences around here was held up with goddamn binder twine and half-assed prayers. That's why.”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“Can you dance?
Of course, I said, even though I can’t really. I think enthusiasm counts for a lot in dancing and in life.”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“I had this vision of the two of us holding hands or getting into some light petting behind shower curtains or up in the fencing aisle or some shit.”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“Well, at least I can spare myself the ordeal of a whole battery of personality tests. My personality is poor; that much is clear.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“It must be amazing to end each day consumed with something other than disappointment at yourself and the world.”
― Susan Juby, The Fashion Committee

“People never like to talk about their slower relatives. I got a cousin, twice removed, got webs between his toes, ain't said one word his whole life. You never hear about him in the family newsletter that goes around every Christmas. Hell, nobody mentions me, either, if it comes to that. Families is funny about who they advertise.”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“There are truths found in books or films when some writer puts exactly the right words together and it's like their pen turned sword and pierced you right through the heart.”
― Susan Juby, The Truth Commission

“Much as I usually dislike nice, positive people, I have to admit that Margaret isn’t bad.”
― Susan Juby, Alice, I Think

“We got up and smiled at each other. His eyes were lovely, and I was reminded of a line in book I read once, that God exists in the spaces between people.”
― Susan Juby, The Truth Commission

“It’s funny how you can be all alone and in danger and then a minute later feel totally safe, like you’ve never been lonely before.”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield

“Fucking Hallmark never wrote anything for how I felt then. When Metallica and the rest of the metal community pitched in to pay for Acrassicauda, the Iraqi heavy metal band, to move to the US is the only thing that comes close. And maybe the late-breaking success of Anvil. I had a toasty heart, especially after I got called back to pick up first prize for Miss Frizz. Ah, never mind. You know what I'm saying.”
― Susan Juby, Home to Woefield