Joe Surkiewicz's Blog - Posts Tagged "crime"

Switchblade: Issue Ten by Jim Wilsky

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


A great collection of hardcase crime and "gutter noir" (from the blurb). C.W. Blackwell's "For Love or Money" kicks it off. If it was the only story in the collection, it's worth the price of admission. Paige is a femme fatale for the ages and I won't spoil it. (Bonus: Blackwell is the subject of mini-interview in the back of the book.) Yet the always reliable Serena Jayne gives Paige a run for the money in "The Nature of Nurture," with this winning opening line: "Cynthia preferred her men big and dumb." I'm catching up with all the Switchblade issues; they don't disappoint.



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Switchblade : Issue Twelve by Jon Zelazny

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


How's this for a lede: "The motel room smelled like cooked dope and sex." Kinda hard to stop reading. I couldn't and neither will you. It's C.W. Blackwell again, this time with his short story "From Dusk to Blonde," a revenge tale that will leave you slackjawed. Yep, that good. "They Call Me Cuban Pete" by Andrew Miller is another keeper. What can you say about a hitman story featuring, of all people, Desi Arnaz? It resonates, like all the crime stories in this edition. Switchblade is my go-to source for dystopian, hard-hitting noir. Just in time for the end of the world.



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Switchblade: Issue Eleven by Serena Jayne

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Another collection of hard-hitting crime noir shorts. Men will find "The Lady Urologist" by David Rachels particularly disturbing, so of course it's highly recommended. The lede: "I'm complaining again about how my piss burns when Seymour asks me if I've got the clap. I say, 'Not unless you can get the clap from your fist.'" I'm particularly prone to humor in my noir and this flash fiction nails it. As do the other stories in this edition.



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Fire in the Hole by Elmore Leonard

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


The title story is the obvious reason to read this collection. But another story (which I've read before, so it must be in another Leonard anthology), When the Women Come Out to Dance, is a masterpiece of chilling crime fiction. Regardless, they're all great stories.



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All Due Respect 2020 by Chris Rhatigan

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


An entertaining collection of dark crime fiction with one outstanding story, "49,000 Ways to Die" by Tom Leins (pronounced lines, according to a YouTube clip). It's way over-the-top, outrageous and funny. Check out this lede: "The meaty motherfucker with the leprous complexion is taking his Doberman for a shit on the grass when I hit him." I knew I was in for a wild ride and wasn't disappointed. It's the definitive hardboiled voice I've been searching for.

Honorable mentions to Stephen D. Rogers ("Mad Dog"), Preston Lang ("The Woman from Florence") and Jay Butkowski ("What's One More?").

And, yes, I'm getting more Leins, who has a whole slew of short noirs with tantalizing titles like Skull Meat, Boneyard Dogs, Slug Bait, Spine Farm and The Good Book: Fairy Tales for Hard Men. Can't wait!



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Meat Bubbles and other stories: The Paignton Noir Case Files by Tom Leins

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Sick but not too sick. Leins is an amazing writer, although I do worry about him.



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Boneyard Dogs: A Paignton Noir Mystery by Tom Leins

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Brutal, breathtaking, hilarious, sad. What else do you need? Leins is an amazing writer who's built his own niche.



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Sharp Knives & Loud Guns by Tom Leins

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Still trying to figure out the disturbing but undeniable attraction to Leins' writing. (I'm filling a shelf with his books.) The ledes, of course: "Henry Rivera is a fat, sloppy piece of shit." Picked that one at random. Sets the tone with refreshing bluntness, and it's downhill from there (for Rivera). Leins' utter lack of literary pretentiousness, coupled with his skill and inventiveness as a writer, kept me engaged page after page (I sprung for the paperback). "When I leave the Greasy Nugget, Remy Cornish is idling on the pavement in his mobility scooter, munching on a pack of beef and onion crisps." Another picked-at-random lede that does the job, telling you things are about to go very, very bad for a contemptible bad guy, never mind the scooter. Also had fun casting protagonist Joe Rey on the chance the Paignton Noir Case Files (of which SK & LG is the latest installment) gets opted. Robert De Niro, natch, but too old. An against-type Rowan Atkinson? Also too old. Joe Pesci? Ditto. Wait--Timothy Olyphant. Showed he can do psychopath in Justified. But can he do the accent? They'd probably set it in Baltimore and give Rey a girlfriend. I hate the series already.



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