Leo Babauta's Blog

By Leo Babauta

We’re entering the last month of the year, and for many of us, it’s a darker and quieter season.

It’s the perfect time for reflection.

I like to use December to deepen into reflection, and in my ​Fearless Living Academy​, we do a yearly ritual that I call “Sacred Bow” (as in “bow in reverence to your past year”). In this ritual, we:

Spend some time reflecting on what we accomplished, went through, and learned for the past yearGet clear on what goals and projects we fell short on, and what we can learn from thatEnvision our coming year, with goals and intentionsCreate structure to make those intentions a reality

I invite you to ​join us in Fearless Living Academy​ and be a part of this Sacred Bow process!

In this article, I’ll share some additional ways I like to deepen into reflection in December …

Reflect on Life & Meaning

Life rushes by so fast. Day by day, it feels like a rushing river and I barely have time to notice the water passing by before it’s gone.

Taking some time in quiet and stillness means that I can slow down and reflect on life. On my life, on human life. On what it means, or what I want it to mean.

What have I learned in recent years that adds to the meaning of life for me?

What I’ve been finding here lately is a sense of sacredness and depth to each moment that I often don’t notice, because I’m so focused on getting stuff done or dealing with the situation in front of me or letting myself be distracted. When I slow down into stillness, that depth and sacredness becomes more accessible to me.

Reflect on My Practice & Growth

I find the end of the year an important time to reflect on what I’ve been practicing with in my life. Have I been deepening into mindfulness, practicing with uncertainty and fear, learning to become more aware of my patterns as they show up?

This is an ongoing journey of growth, and it’s immensely important that I take time to reflect on it on a regular basis.

What have you been practicing lately? What are you learning from that practice? What growth have you been noticing?

Reflect on Darkness, Stillness & Death

December is a beautiful month to slow down and reflect on three things:

Darkness: Where I live now (northern California), December is the darkest month of the year. I found that depressing when we moved here from Guam, and that continued for years after we moved … until recent years, when I decided to start to examine my relationship to darkness. It’s a profound reflection for me, and I am starting to open to the beauty and wonder of darkness, both outside of me and within.Stillness: It’s also a month when things feel frozen and still, and I’m learning to embrace that as well. I’m someone who likes to move quickly, but there’s so much wisdom in stillness. I have to practice against my default tendency. Sitting outside in stillness, and noticing what shows up in that stillness, is a practice I resist and love.Death: As a society, we tend to fear death. That’s understandable. But winter is a death that opens space for new life, and I embrace it as an affirmation of life. I reflect on the loved ones I’ve lost, and how much they still mean to me. I reflect on my own death, and find some degree of acceptance of that.

Do any of these topics resonate with you?

I encourage you to carve out some time for reflection as the year comes to a close.

And once again, if you’d like to be a part of the Sacred Bow ritual, I invite you to ​join us in Fearless Living Academy​!

The post A Month of Reflection appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

When I was younger, I had a hard time doing some basic things like:

Paying billsKeeping the house cleanRunning errandsDoing yard workDoing car and house maintenanceTaking care of my healthStay on top of work tasks

I always knew that I “should” do these things, but they felt like too much back then. Avoiding taking care of things always left me feeling like my life was a mess.

These days … I’m not at all perfect at any of the above … but I’m so much better at it. And it leaves me feeling like my life is taken care of.

Which leaves me feeling like I’m worth taking care of.

So how did I transform this? I’ll share that journey in this article.

The Start of the Transformation

In the beginning, I just knew that I wanted my life to not be such a big mess. But it felt too overwhelming to take on everything, and I kept failing at my efforts.

The transformation really started when I decided that I was going to take really small steps. One at a time. In one or two areas at a time:

Clean my sink (and slowly expand to the whole kitchen)Pick up my clothes and put them away immediatelyPick up one bill from my pile and take care of it (or make a plan to do so)Put on my running shoes and get outside, even for just 5-10 minutesFloss one tooth

That last one really gets people. But I spent years struggling to get the flossing habit going, and feeling really bad that I couldn’t do it. Then I saw a talk where someone said this is how they formed the flossing habit, and it sounded so easy I couldn’t say no. So I started. Now I floss almost every night.

These tiny steps make a huge difference over time. They won’t change everything all at once, but they do change everything.

The Mindset Shift That Changed Everything

The real shifts were internal. I had a bunch of mindset shifts:

It’s easier to do it now than to tackle a huge pile laterIt feels so good when things are getting taken care ofA cleared surface is so much more beautiful than a piled up surfaceThings that are neglected fall to ruin

But there was a small mindset shift that actually was the biggest shift for me: it can be really lovely to take care of things.

I found that I can enjoy the simple act of cleaning up. I learned to love clearing clutter, or emptying out an inbox.

For me, clearing things out and making things orderly is deeply satisfying.

Once I realized that, it became easy. Joyful even!

The Joyful Way It Looks These Days

So how do I take care of my life these days? In so many ways. But with a sense of glee!

I start each week by clearing out my inboxes, and putting my tasks in order, and setting my intentions for the week. It makes me feel clear and happy.

I start and finish my day by making sure the kitchen is in order and things are put away. And by flossing and brushing my teeth. This helps me feel that there’s a bit of order to my life.

If I see an area that can use some tidying, I do it during my breaks, so I get a little movement in. I go back to work after the break feeling more satisfied.

If yard or house maintenance is too much to do during my breaks, I save it for the weekend. And then I enjoy the feeling of taking care of my family.

I do a workout almost every day, and feel like I’m honoring my wonderful body.

I make sure my bills are paid and my budget is up-to-date every morning. It makes me feel like my money is happy.

In each area, I’m taking care of my life, my family, my body, my business. I’m bringing a little bit of order to the chaos of the world. And I’m giving myself a lovely, satisfying experience.

May you find this joy as well.

The post The Joy of Taking Care of My Life appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

Eating healthy is something I’ve been a bit obsessed with for the last couple of decades, and I’ve transformed my eating in some really fundamental ways:

I eat way less junk food than beforeI have developed a real love for whole, nutritious foodsI’m vegan (for ethical reasons)I don’t often eat to comfort myself (sometimes I do)When I do eat comfort foods, I’m no longer harsh with myself

These are huge transformations for me, and they’ve changed my health and my mindset towards health.

At 51 years old, I feel incredibly healthy — and I’d like to share my thoughts on healthy eating, in case it might help. That doesn’t mean I think I’m perfect, or even better than anyone else — but I always appreciate learning from how others approach healthy eating, and I’m hoping you’ll appreciate my approach.

How I Think About Healthy Eating

I used to think about healthy eating as this sacrifice that I needed to make in order to be “good” — whatever that means. Like, if I was eating unhealthy foods, then it was something shameful I was doing to myself.

As you can imagine, that’s not very helpful. Society gives us messages that we should be ashamed if we eat junk food (it’s even in the name), when all we’re really trying to do is enjoy good food, or comfort ourselves. These are not shameful things!

That said, I do think there are foods that are nourishing for my body, and help it to grow into something strong, alive, and prepared to handle life’s challenges.

And so I don’t shame myself anymore for eating sweets, fried foods, snacks … I enjoy them! But I also have found the eating approach that makes me feel amazing in my life, and that’s what I try to do most of the time.

What I Find Important

The most important thing to me are to eat whole, plant foods … most of the time.

Those include:

Vegetables of all kinds (especially greens)Beans & lentilsWhole grains (including brown rice, oats, etc.)Potatoes of various kindsFruits of ALL kinds!Nuts and seeds

If my meal is almost all whole plant foods, then I feel incredible. These foods are so good for my body.

Now, I don’t think animal foods are necessarily bad for you — you don’t have to be vegan to be healthy. If I were to eat animal foods, I would probably eat mostly fish and some poultry, but I don’t see a need to do so for my health, and would prefer not to harm other beings if it’s not absolutely necessary.

I thrive on these foods, and my health is excellent (I do get everything tested every year or so).

My Favorite Meals & Foods

So what do meals look like when you eat mostly whole plant foods? Well, there’s a TON of incredible recipes out there, but I’m pretty boring. I eat mostly the same meals every day, because it’s just easier for me to prepare a big batch and not have to think about it.

Some of my favorites:

Lentils & steamed kale — I eat a big plate of cooked green/brown lentils and kale, and season it all with soy sauce, lemon juice, olive oil, cayenne powder, and nutritional yeast (a recipe from my friend Jesse)Lentil soup — I sautee onions, mushrooms, carrots and broccoli in my Instant Pot, then throw in lentils, kale, cubed tofu and veggie broth with spices (rosemary, thyme, sage, bay leaves, black pepper). High pressure for 10 minutes, put some lemon juice or balsamic vinegar on top to seasonOats with berries or bananas and seeds, with cinnamonTofu scramble with lots of veggiesBaked sweet potato with hummus and avocado!Bananas with peanut butter is my treatProtein shake with pea protein and soy milk if I do a weight workout

I also love vegan chili, veggie burgers, pasta, lasagna, Thai curry, and more. But the meals above are my faves.

How I Learned to Love These Foods

I’ll admit, I didn’t always love vegetables, or things like lentils or quinoa or tofu. I was a meat eater, and loved fast food and snacks.

The way I learned to love the foods I mentioned above is … slowly.

First, I adapted my favorite dishes to be slightly more healthy. I diced up carrots and greens and put it in spaghetti sauce and chili. I would eat a small side salad with my dishes, and season it with crunchy things.

Then I would eat veggies with things that made them taste better — hummus, salad dressing. I’d eat sweet potatoes with butter and cinnamon.

Eventually I really embraced veggies, and would eat a HUGE salad for lunch, and would make steamed or raw veggies the biggest part of my meals.

Finally, I slowly started to cut out sugar from many of my meals, fried less of my foods, and cut out greasy things for the most part. And explored more and more delicious healthy foods.

Staying on the Path

I’ll admit, I go on stretches where I don’t eat the healthiest … maybe a couple of weeks where we have a lot of visitors and I’ll just eat whatever we’re making for them, or eat out a lot more. I tend to eat less healthily during the holidays, or when I travel. I’m OK with all of that!

I’ve learned to not beat myself up, and just enjoy the food. Why not enjoy life?

But then I’ve learned to just get back on track. Each day is a fresh start, where I can decide what will nourish my body the most. And more and more, I make choices that are delicious and nutritious, and are a part of the life that I love.

The post Thoughts on Healthy Eating appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

I believe in finding powerful practices for transformation wherever we can find them. And the Stoic philosophers Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, Seneca are huge inspirations for me.

I’ve found there to be a huge overlap between Stoicism and Zen Buddhism, even if there are also some key differences. The overlap between Zen & Stoicism are things I share below, and they are powerful practices.

1. What We Control

One of the main Stoic principles is to focus on what you can control, and let go of what you can’t. And most of life is what we can’t control: other people’s opinions and actions, the weather, world events for the most part, accidents, loss. Too often we let those things affect our happiness, even if we can’t do anything about them.

Think about how often you get frustrated or stressed by something you can’t control. What if you declared that that was none of your business — your business instead is focusing on doing your best in the present moment.

Zen also focuses on doing your best in the present moment, from a place of compassion. I find this focus to be simple, powerful, and liberating.

2. Reminder of Death

The Stoics would remind themselves that they were going to die, on a regular basis. Buddhists do this too — one branch of Buddhists will meditate in a graveyard for this purpose, something that I do as well.

Life is short and precious, and we take it for granted. We need to remind ourselves of this often, so that we can make the most of each day, and each moment.

3. Loving What Is

The Stoics didn’t use the term “​amor fati​” (that was Nietzsche) but Marcus Aurelius and Epictetus definitely espoused the idea that we should embrace what is actually happening rather than what we wish things would be.

Epictetus: “Don’t seek to have events happen as you wish, but wish them to happen as they do happen, and all will be well with you.”

This is a Zen idea as well, to embrace reality as it is, and the ways we suffer are based on wanting things to be different.

What if you could learn to love each moment, exactly as it is? To do this, you have to find the beauty in life as it happens. Start with the easy moments (a quiet morning, a nice cup of tea, seeing the face of someone you love) and then slowly work towards more difficult ones (someone is being negative, you have a difficult task before you). Leave the hardest things as an advanced challenge for later (death, illness, war).

4. Contemplate Misfortune

Seneca had a practice called “premeditatio malorum,” or contemplating adversity in advance, where you would visualize all the bad things that would happen to you, as a rehearsal.

For example, if you’re about to take a trip, you might imagine all the things that could go wrong — you forgot your passport, you lost your luggage, you got robbed, you got lost, you got sick. Actually visualize all of these things happening. And imagine that they aren’t traumatic, but neutral — there’s no problem. Maybe you actually loved the experience!

Then, if any of them actually did happen … then you’re prepared. Nothing can happen to you that’s worse than what you’ve already experienced in the contemplation! You’ve already gone through it all.

In this way, we have prepared ourselves, like putting ourselves into ice cold water to prepare for swimming in the Atlantic.

The Zen tradition is more about present-moment meditation … but in a way, when we meditate, we are facing everything that comes up for us in the present moment (boredom, distraction, discomfort, frustration, etc.) and so when the same things (inevitably) come up for us later, we’ve already faced them.

5. A Higher Perspective

There’s a way I like to visualize taking a “God’s-eye view” of humanity — looking down on all of humankind, like we’re the size of ants.

This kind of bigger perspective reminds me that:

My problems are actually small, even if they seem big; andWe are all interconnected, even if it feels we’re alone.

This makes my life easier.

The Stoics called this the “higher view.” In Zen, we practice reminding ourselves of our interconnectedness. It’s the “truth” of reality (as opposed to having a separate self) that helps us to feel connected and compassionate.

These practices help me tremendously in my life. They are liberating and motivating at the same time. And they take practice — a lifetime’s worth.

The post 5 Stoic & Zen Practices That I Believe In appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

Last year, I turned 50 years old … and I found myself thinking about aging more than I ever had before. To be clear, 50 years old is still pretty young, but there’s something about the number that had me realizing that my 60s and 70s aren’t very far away, and it was a bit confronting to me.

After all, I’d spent most of my life thinking that growing old was something to fear. It’s a cultural assumption that goes deep into our society — beliefs that being old means you are feeble, weak, helpless, irrelevant. I know that that isn’t really true — but we’re constantly given cultural messages that it is true.

So when I turned 50, I spent some time sitting with this. What does it mean to me to grow older? What are my fears? What are my prejudices? How do I want my older years to be?

As an exercise, I highly recommend that you start to notice your own biases about aging and being old, and notice how often people around you (and in the media you consume) talk about aging as if it’s a bad thing. The word “old” is used as an insult. If you say you’re old, other people will tell you, “Oh, you’re not old yet” as if you were insulting yourself. Or, “It’s OK, you don’t look old.” Or, “You look young for your age!” These are meant to be reassuring, because being old is assumed to be bad.

It’s all around us. And when everyone and everything we encounter treats being old, and aging, as something bad, then of course we’re going to fear it. It’s similar to old cultural messages about being overweight, being gay, or having a mental disability. These are all turned into insults, which means if we are any of these things, we are meant to feel ashamed.

Let’s rebel against all of that! Reclaim being old, reclaim aging. If we can change these messages, at least to ourselves, then the fear and shame lose their power over us.

So here are some things I’ve done in the past 18 months to transform my relationship to aging:

I started noticing my own biases against aging and old age. And started noticing it in the way others talk about aging and being old.I started pointing this hidden agism out to others, lovingly. And changing my language around all of it.I started seeing people who are empowered in their old age — athletes, Nobel prize winners, incredible artists, people who are pillars in their communities, monks and sages, gardeners and house builders. I started seeing them as my models.I started envisioning how I want to be in my older years. Empowered, compassionate, creative, adventurous, learning, expanding. Gentle, kind, and curious.I began to sit with my fears of being powerless. This is the hidden beast underneath our fears about aging — none of us want to feel powerless, and yet we are all descending into helplessness eventually. So I found places where I already feel powerless, and began to bring compassion to myself whenever I feel it.I see every challenge that will come to me in old age — physical, mental, emotional, relational, career, spiritual — as exactly the edge for me to practice with, when they come. My strength and wisdom will only deepen as I encounter these challenges, as they have with all of my challenges so far.

And with this, I now feel so in love with growing older!

It’s a magical thing, living into this new chapter of my life. I feel more patient, more compassionate, more connected to others, than ever before. And I look forward to the adventure that awaits me as my body and mind and spirit continue to evolve.

I wish you all love as you progress in your journeys as well.

The post Overcoming the Fear of Aging appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

Sometimes we decide not to do something because it feels like there’s not enough time to do the task — it will take me 2 hours to work on that task, and I only have 20 minutes, so why bother starting?

We do this kind of thing more than we realize — there’s not enough time to finish this, so why start? I don’t know if I’ll ever finish it, so why bother?

This feeling of pointlessness is one of our biggest obstacles.

It feels pointless, so why try? Why even start?

This equates the value of trying with the outcome of the activity. In this thinking, it’s only worthwhile if we finish, if we succeed. This diminishes our efforts, because it means trying is only worth it if we get the outcome we want.

What if there’s value in trying, no matter what the outcome?

What if putting ourselves into something is valuable because it expands us, because we learn, or because the activity itself is worth savoring?

What if we start a task and only do it for 20 minutes, and leave it unfinished, and that’s OK? Maybe starting it will move the ball forward in a meaningful way. Maybe not — maybe just starting is a good practice in and of itself, because then we’re practicing overcoming our initial resistance.

Learn to notice this thinking when it shows up: it’s not worth starting, it’s not worth trying, what’s the point?

And then find the deeper meaning for yourself, and overcome this bias of pointlessness.

The post There’s Not Enough Time appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

Each day, I try to get outside for a walk or run (or other sport like cycling or basketball), and my debate with myself is often whether to bring my phone and earbuds to listen to music, a podcast, an audiobook … or to go tech-free.

Tech-free is my favorite option — and I’d like to share why.

I do love listening to audiobooks and podcasts. I’ve had many hours of running or walking listening and learning, and I think it’s a valuable way to spend my time. So much goodness from this.

I also love music, whether it’s grooving to old tunes or exploring new stuff, dancing to what my kids listen to … it lifts my heart.

But going without technology is my favorite of all, and I only recently rediscovered this classic joy.

Without technology, I feel more present, more open to experiences in the world. I feel more connected to nature. I don’t miss out on little kids playing in the park in ways that make me smile. Life is more wondrous, in full color.

And what’s more, I do my best thinking while on technology-free walks and runs. My best ideas come to me. I solve my toughest problems. I have deeper reflections on my own experiences. This is more valuable than 100 audiobooks.

Finally, and maybe even most importantly, I get out of the bubble of my comfort. Most of us are connected to technology all day long, from the moment we wake up. Maybe we have some disconnected time in little pockets, like showering or cooking (although even there, some people listen to music), but even while eating, working out, commuting, we tend to be connected to our devices. I don’t think technology is bad — it empowers so much good — but I do think we tend to use it as a comfort bubble to insulate us from the world. Getting out of that bubble daily is one of the most important things we can do, so we don’t shrink our capacity to be with life as it is. And believe me, I’ve seen it shrinking in many people.

What would it be like to have a daily time to be fully connected to the world, and out of your comfort zone?

The post What Happens When You Walk or Run Daily, Without Tech appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

There’s a practice that I find to be really valuable, and I call it “Examining Beliefs.”

If you regularly engage with this, it will transform you.

Let’s say there’s something you want to do but you feel stuck — maybe you’re procrastinating a lot, maybe you’re stuck in an old habit. The practice starts with trying to discover the thought or belief that causes your action (or inaction).

For example:

I don’t want to do this because I’m going to do a bad job (belief: I’m going to do a bad job)I’m dreading doing this because it’ll be boring (belief: it’s going to be boring)I don’t want to do this because it’ll be really hard and uncomfortable (belief: it’ll be too hard/uncomfortable)

As you might expect, these beliefs don’t help you to achieve your goals.

You might also examine any beliefs that cause you to be frustrated or resentful with someone else:

They shouldn’t behave that wayThey don’t love/respect meThey don’t support me

These beliefs cause you to feel unhappy with someone.

So what can we do once we discover the belief? Examine it, and then if we like, practice letting it go.

How to Examine the Belief

If you can’t uncover the belief that’s holding you back or making you unhappy … get into a conversation with someone else who can help you see what you can’t see. (If you’d like to work with me as a coach, ​apply for my 1-on-1 coaching​.)

Once you’ve uncovered the belief, here’s how to examine it … ask these questions:

What effect does the belief have on me and my life? Does it make you take action, take care of yourself, or act in line with your intentions? Does it make you avoid, or look for faults, or get frustrated? If you think something will be boring, are you more likely to see it as boring (i.e. seeing through the lens of your belief)? Get clear on what effects this belief has on you.Is the belief really true? It might seem really true … but is it true? And if you say, “Yes, it’s true” … then ask yourself, “Can I be absolutely sure it’s true?” The idea is to question the absolute truth of the belief … because if we can see that there’s even the possibility that it’s not true, then maybe we can begin to consider letting it go.What would it be like without this belief? Imagine what it would feel like if you didn’t have this belief. Can you imagine it? If so, what you’re experiencing is a moment where you’re free.

Once you’ve gone through this practice of examining the belief … ask yourself if you’d like to practice with letting the belief go.

How to Practice Letting Go

First, you have to notice when you are being influenced by the belief — when it’s operating on you. If you’re frustrated with someone, or avoiding something, for example … then the belief is operating on you. Notice that it’s happening.

Now ask yourself: what would it be like in this moment without the belief?

Imagine that you could just … “Poof!” … have the belief disappear. Imagine that you are free right now. It should feel more peaceful, more liberated.

Now try to take action from this freedom. Try to live life, with this freedom.

This is the practice of Examining Beliefs. If you seriously engage with it, you will unlock your life.

The post The Practice of Examining Our Beliefs appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

When we’re looking to grow, what we’re really trying to do is step into a new, expanded view of ourselves.

For example, if you want to be more mindful, or live more simply, or be more compassionate with yourself or others, or be more disciplined about your meaningful work … these are all new versions of you. They’re expanded beyond your old way of seeing yourself.

We’re constantly trying to expand beyond an old identity: when we try something new, or try to grow in our relationships, or try to quit a bad habit … what we’re really doing is trying to shed our old self-view.

Unfortunately, the old self-view has a gravity to it, that tries to constantly pull us back into the old way.

So in some of the examples above, you might see:

Be more mindful — the old way of going through your life mindlessly pulls you back in by having you get pulled into distractions, habitual patterns, etc.Living simply — the old way of living a cluttered life tries to keep you there by having fear stop you from decluttering, or by having fear try to have you shop on impulse.Be more disciplined — your old procrastinator self will put up resistance to that discipline, and have you want to avoid anything difficult or overwhelming.Try something new — your old comfortable self will throw up lots of resistance and thoughts to have you put off trying the new thing and feeling bad or awkward at it.Quit a bad habit — your old self will tell you, “Just this once won’t hurt” or “Why are you making yourself suffer” or “You deserve this reward” so that you stay in the comfort of the bad habit.

So the old identity tries to keep us in what we know. How do we expand beyond it?

Here’s what I’ve found.

1: Set the intention of an expanded self

Let’s imagine that you weren’t limited by your old identity — who do you want to be? What would you like to do that feels a bit impossible? It can be something small (“I want to wake up a little earlier”), or it can be a massive shift for you (“I want to put my creative work out into the world in a bold way”).

Set this intention. Get clear on why this matters to you.

Then commit yourself to the actions that this expanded self would take.

2: Practice the actions and being

The shift in your self-view will come as you take actions that are outside of the old limited self-view. If your old identity is that you are an introvert, but now you’re talking to strangers every day … the old identity can’t survive.

So commit to taking the actions every day — or at least, most days, because it’s OK to give yourself breaks. The practice the expanded self-view by taking those actions as much as possible.

It will likely be hard, because you’ll be pulled back by your old identity (see next section) … but practice doing them anyway!

And as you do the actions, practice the expanded way of being as an inner state. For example, maybe you want to be more joyful as you do your work — then practice that joyfulness!

3: Notice when & how you’re getting pulled back

The old identity will try to pull you back every time you step outside of how you’ve always known yourself. If you want to speak in public, each time you sign up to do a talk, your mind will give you a bunch of reasons why you should cancel.

This is fear in action. It’s a bodily sensation of fear, resistance, dread, overwhelm. It’s also a series of thoughts — rationalizations (“It’s OK to skip it this once”) and mental gymnastics (“Life is too short to put yourself through this”).

Just notice all of this. Take notes! Get curious.

4: Give yourself compassion, but keep practicing

When you notice all of this, it’s simply fear in action. Just give your fear a bit of compassion. Breathe. Be understanding and loving.

Then take a small action, if you can. Just a tiny bit. Even that will create an opening for a new way of seeing yourself.

The post Expanding Beyond Our Old Self-View appeared first on zen habits.

By Leo Babauta

Most of our stresses and frustrations come from our unwillingness to let go.

Hear me out: think about something you’re stressing about, or someone you’re frustrated about. What thought do you have about that person or situation that causes the frustration? It’s often an invisible thought, that we don’t realize we have, but if you were to speak it out loud, it would feel really true.

Try writing it out with one of these prompts:

“They shouldn’t …”

“If I fail, it will mean …”

“I wish things weren’t so …”

Then fill in the blank.

What thought or belief do you have that’s causing your stress or frustration? If you can identify that, you are halfway there.

Now think about how true that thought or belief feels to you. It probably feels like absolute truth. This is the part that we’re unwilling to let go of — the truth of that thought/belief.

What if you could recognize it as a thought or belief, and not as an absolute truth?

Could you see ways that the opposite might be true? For example, if you think of ways that someone “always” acts in a certain way, can you see any times when they didn’t? If it feels like you can’t catch a break, can you see times when life gave you a gift?

What would your life be like if you didn’t have this belief?

In the moment when you considered that question, you let go.

Notice how that works: you imagine life without the belief, and suddenly you have peace.

What if you could practice it every time you had frustration or stress?

The post The Practice of Letting Go appeared first on zen habits.