K.A. Duggan's Blog
March 23, 2016
Goodreads Giveaway!
https://www.goodreads.com/giveaway/sh...
Signed paperback copy available and also as I'm in such a good mood tomorrow the kindle version will be reduced to 99p/ 99c as part of a countdown deal.xxx
Signed paperback copy available and also as I'm in such a good mood tomorrow the kindle version will be reduced to 99p/ 99c as part of a countdown deal.xxx
January 29, 2016
*** Pre-order*** Advance (Advance Industries #1) Excerpt.
I let out a gasp. Some city residents look my way and I force myself to find some composure. Of course I heard about it. Reporters had fallen over themselves; me included to solving the mystery of his disappearance. In fact it was my first ever assignment as a reporter. The great Professor Laudnam just upped and vanished one day and Advance Industries offered a substantial reward for any information that would lead to the safe recovery of their most valued employee.
I inch forward looking at him anew. Beneath the long wild locks and unkempt beard I can just make out the man he was before. I can’t believe I’m sat having coffee with Professor Laudnam. I force myself to sit still and slightly straighter. I must not get all giddy and act like a fan when I’m supposed to be a serious reporter. But knowing that he sought me out over the tons of other reporters is doing funny things for my self-confidence. Why me?
“What was so controversial about the invention that forced you to flee to the streets?”
He sighs again and leans forward lowering his voice, “We were working on a kind of teleportation device and the results were astounding. Really, really, promising when I started to hear talks of it being used for something other than its intended purpose. They wanted to experiment on humans which is absolutely preposterous. We are too large a matter for it to work. The strain to a human would be substantial.”
“Why invent it then?”
“Originally it was designed with medical purposes in mind. Think, if a patient needed an organ straight away but the only match was a hospital off grid, a machine such as we invented could transport the organ in seconds. No more lengthy waiting periods. So many lives would be saved.”
He sounds so passionate that I have to agree. It sounds like a fantastic creation. The Advance tubes would be amazing if that was there sole purpose.
“Okay so let me get this straight, you disagreed with their proposal, but then what? Why did you leave? And why hide in plain sight?”
“It was leave or face ‘accidental death'. They couldn't risk a scientist of my calibre leaking how atrocious the invention would be if used for the wrong means. They could have no negativity surrounding Advance. They are a multi-national corporation and they invested heavily in this design, if anything stopped it being brought to the market they'd crumble.”
“So what do the homeless going missing have to do with this?”
“Come on Faith, you're the reporter do the math. They need to test on humans, what humans are better to test on than unwanted homeless ones, most with no identities. They won't be missed Faith and any that are won't be investigated properly by the law. I think they're being abducted and subjected to testing; testing that will no doubt kill them.”
I inch forward looking at him anew. Beneath the long wild locks and unkempt beard I can just make out the man he was before. I can’t believe I’m sat having coffee with Professor Laudnam. I force myself to sit still and slightly straighter. I must not get all giddy and act like a fan when I’m supposed to be a serious reporter. But knowing that he sought me out over the tons of other reporters is doing funny things for my self-confidence. Why me?
“What was so controversial about the invention that forced you to flee to the streets?”
He sighs again and leans forward lowering his voice, “We were working on a kind of teleportation device and the results were astounding. Really, really, promising when I started to hear talks of it being used for something other than its intended purpose. They wanted to experiment on humans which is absolutely preposterous. We are too large a matter for it to work. The strain to a human would be substantial.”
“Why invent it then?”
“Originally it was designed with medical purposes in mind. Think, if a patient needed an organ straight away but the only match was a hospital off grid, a machine such as we invented could transport the organ in seconds. No more lengthy waiting periods. So many lives would be saved.”
He sounds so passionate that I have to agree. It sounds like a fantastic creation. The Advance tubes would be amazing if that was there sole purpose.
“Okay so let me get this straight, you disagreed with their proposal, but then what? Why did you leave? And why hide in plain sight?”
“It was leave or face ‘accidental death'. They couldn't risk a scientist of my calibre leaking how atrocious the invention would be if used for the wrong means. They could have no negativity surrounding Advance. They are a multi-national corporation and they invested heavily in this design, if anything stopped it being brought to the market they'd crumble.”
“So what do the homeless going missing have to do with this?”
“Come on Faith, you're the reporter do the math. They need to test on humans, what humans are better to test on than unwanted homeless ones, most with no identities. They won't be missed Faith and any that are won't be investigated properly by the law. I think they're being abducted and subjected to testing; testing that will no doubt kill them.”
January 19, 2016
Advance excerpt. Releasing feb 10th
I hoped our reunion would be better than kidnapping her and holding her against her will. I had no choice but I still feel as if I’m no better than Advance Industries. I just couldn’t leave her to go through it again. I’m desperate to touch her, to hold her. Being this close yet so far away is a special kind of torture. I’ve missed her more than I ever knew was possible. I’ve been walking around with an ache in my chest, feeling as though the world fell away below my feet. I’ve imagined being with her again thousands of times, it’s what kept me going and it’s breaking me knowing she doesn’t remember me...doesn’t want me.
I know I need to be patient and generally I’m exceptionally good at that; just not where she’s concerned. I’ve waited to see her again for so long and even though I have my wish I want more. I want her to have missed me and pined for me as much as I have for her. I want to hold her against me naked and wanting. I want to bury myself in her over and over. I want the simple things like hearing her laugh. I want her back! Not this imposter playing at being the woman I know. I harden just from remembering what she tasted like. She’s staring at me, a picture of innocence. Her cheeks are flushed, her chestnut hair splayed over her shoulder. Her pools of sea blue eyes are wide, and her body language conflicted.
She’s beautiful but doesn’t know it.
She’s brave but doesn’t believe it.
She’s mine but doesn’t remember it.
Without thinking and wholly needing to, I indulge my impulse as I bring my mouth to hers, tasting her for the first time in way too long. I bring my hand around to the nape of her neck pulling her closer. She doesn’t fight, it’s as though she’s been waiting for me to make my move, she moulds into me, fitting as perfectly as I remember and my hope is ignited. Hope that I can still cause the same reactions, feelings, and emotions in her.
I pour everything I have to give in to this kiss. I start gently; parting her lips with my tongue until hers meets mine in a tangled duel. Urged on by how responsive she is I deepen it. I tangle my fingers in her hair and kiss her fiercely, needing her to feel my need for her and more importantly my love for her. I’ve missed so many things about her, but kissing her, yeah that has to be top of my list. I kiss her like it’s the last time I’ll ever do so because I never know what’s next. If I’d known she was going to leave me all those months ago, I never would have stopped kissing her.
I pull back quickly when she gasps and study her, searching her eyes and waiting for her acknowledgment that that kiss evoked a memory in her. A recollection of our past. She gives me nothing except her cute blush and my heart falls. What the fuck can I do to make her remember? I’m beside myself and starting to panic. I decide to plead with her once more. I’m not above begging...not where she’s concerned.
“Stay with me sweetheart... please. I don’t want to let you go back, but I won’t force you to stay.” I hang my head unable to look into her eyes as she tells me the words I can’t bear to hear. My chest is heaving as my heart rattles against my rib cage waiting for her to speak. To tell me that she’s leaving me... again.
Pre-order links; http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01A...
I know I need to be patient and generally I’m exceptionally good at that; just not where she’s concerned. I’ve waited to see her again for so long and even though I have my wish I want more. I want her to have missed me and pined for me as much as I have for her. I want to hold her against me naked and wanting. I want to bury myself in her over and over. I want the simple things like hearing her laugh. I want her back! Not this imposter playing at being the woman I know. I harden just from remembering what she tasted like. She’s staring at me, a picture of innocence. Her cheeks are flushed, her chestnut hair splayed over her shoulder. Her pools of sea blue eyes are wide, and her body language conflicted.
She’s beautiful but doesn’t know it.
She’s brave but doesn’t believe it.
She’s mine but doesn’t remember it.
Without thinking and wholly needing to, I indulge my impulse as I bring my mouth to hers, tasting her for the first time in way too long. I bring my hand around to the nape of her neck pulling her closer. She doesn’t fight, it’s as though she’s been waiting for me to make my move, she moulds into me, fitting as perfectly as I remember and my hope is ignited. Hope that I can still cause the same reactions, feelings, and emotions in her.
I pour everything I have to give in to this kiss. I start gently; parting her lips with my tongue until hers meets mine in a tangled duel. Urged on by how responsive she is I deepen it. I tangle my fingers in her hair and kiss her fiercely, needing her to feel my need for her and more importantly my love for her. I’ve missed so many things about her, but kissing her, yeah that has to be top of my list. I kiss her like it’s the last time I’ll ever do so because I never know what’s next. If I’d known she was going to leave me all those months ago, I never would have stopped kissing her.
I pull back quickly when she gasps and study her, searching her eyes and waiting for her acknowledgment that that kiss evoked a memory in her. A recollection of our past. She gives me nothing except her cute blush and my heart falls. What the fuck can I do to make her remember? I’m beside myself and starting to panic. I decide to plead with her once more. I’m not above begging...not where she’s concerned.
“Stay with me sweetheart... please. I don’t want to let you go back, but I won’t force you to stay.” I hang my head unable to look into her eyes as she tells me the words I can’t bear to hear. My chest is heaving as my heart rattles against my rib cage waiting for her to speak. To tell me that she’s leaving me... again.
Pre-order links; http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01A...
December 12, 2015
Advance Industries excerpt. Coming soon...
Kye
I weigh up my options, knowing that telling her will cause a freak out but desperate for her to remember so she can get on board with me.
More than anything though, I’ve missed her.
I knew it was likely she’d forget once she was sent back but she insisted she had to try. I don’t know if she’ll ever get her memories back... memories of me, of us.
It guts me to know she remembers nothing of our time together. How I found her, looked after her... loved her. How we were completely inseparable, our hearts beating as one for a short time, a time I cherished. I never should have agreed to let her go back, but her courage was something that called to me from our first meeting. She’d been coerced too much; I had to give her back her free will and I’ve been beating myself up for it ever since.
I hoped our reunion would be better than kidnapping her and holding her against her will. I had no choice but I still feel as if I’m no better than Advance. I just couldn’t leave her to go through it again. I’m desperate to touch her, hold her. Being this close yet so far away is a special kind of torture. I’ve missed her more than I ever knew was possible. I’ve been walking around with an ache in my chest, feeling as though the world fell away below my feet. I’ve imagined being with her again thousands of times, it’s what kept me going and it’s breaking me knowing she doesn’t remember me, doesn’t want me.
I know I need to be patient and generally I’m exceptionally good at that; just not where she’s concerned. I’ve waited to see her again for so long and even though I have my wish I want more. I want her to have missed me and pined for me as much as I have for her. I want to hold her against me naked and wanting. I want to bury myself in her over and over. I want to hear her laugh. I want her back! I harden just from remembering what she tasted like. She’s staring at me, a picture of innocence.
She’s beautiful and doesn’t know it.
She’s brave but doesn’t believe it.
She’s mine but doesn’t remember it.
Without thinking and wholly needing to, I indulge my impulse as I bring my mouth to hers, tasting her for the first time in way too long. I bring my hand around to the nape of her neck, pulling her closer. She doesn’t fight, it’s as though she’s been waiting for me to make my move, she moulds into me, fitting as perfectly as I remember and my hope is ignited. Hope that I can still cause the same reactions, feelings, and emotions in her.
I pour everything I have to give in to this kiss. I start gently; parting her lips with my tongue until hers meets mine in a tangled duel. Urged on by how responsive she is I deepen it. I kiss her fiercely, needing her to feel my need for her and more importantly my love for her. I’ve missed so many things about her, but kissing her, yeah that has to be top of my list.
I pull back quickly when she gasps and study her, searching her eyes and waiting for her acknowledgment that that kiss evoked a memory in her. A recollection of our past. She gives me nothing except her cute blush and my heart falls. What the fuck can I do to make her remember? I’m beside myself and starting to panic. I decide to plead with her once more. I’m not above begging...not where she’s concerned.
“Stay with me sweetheart... please. I don’t want to let you go back, but I won’t force you to stay.” I hang my head unable to look into her eyes as she tells me the words I can’t bear to hear. My chest is heaving, my heart rattling against my rib cage waiting for her to speak. To tell me that she’s leaving me... again.
She gently caresses my face with her palm and her touch still sends sparks through me. She makes me feel the same way she always did. She puts her finger under my chin and coaxes me to lift my face until our eyes lock on one another again. They stay locked, losing ourselves in the intensity of the moment. She stares for a long time until her look changes from bewilderment at my reaction to something more familiar. She searches my eyes for answers before breathily saying, “I’ll stay Kye. God knows why but I feel safe with you. I trust you.”
My heart blooms, that’s a start. She should be distrusting by nature considering the life she’s led, but she feels safe and trusts me. That’s something I can work on. I hoped it would be a quick transition but she’s worth the wait. I’ll wait for her forever if I have to!
I travelled for her.
There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her.
I weigh up my options, knowing that telling her will cause a freak out but desperate for her to remember so she can get on board with me.
More than anything though, I’ve missed her.
I knew it was likely she’d forget once she was sent back but she insisted she had to try. I don’t know if she’ll ever get her memories back... memories of me, of us.
It guts me to know she remembers nothing of our time together. How I found her, looked after her... loved her. How we were completely inseparable, our hearts beating as one for a short time, a time I cherished. I never should have agreed to let her go back, but her courage was something that called to me from our first meeting. She’d been coerced too much; I had to give her back her free will and I’ve been beating myself up for it ever since.
I hoped our reunion would be better than kidnapping her and holding her against her will. I had no choice but I still feel as if I’m no better than Advance. I just couldn’t leave her to go through it again. I’m desperate to touch her, hold her. Being this close yet so far away is a special kind of torture. I’ve missed her more than I ever knew was possible. I’ve been walking around with an ache in my chest, feeling as though the world fell away below my feet. I’ve imagined being with her again thousands of times, it’s what kept me going and it’s breaking me knowing she doesn’t remember me, doesn’t want me.
I know I need to be patient and generally I’m exceptionally good at that; just not where she’s concerned. I’ve waited to see her again for so long and even though I have my wish I want more. I want her to have missed me and pined for me as much as I have for her. I want to hold her against me naked and wanting. I want to bury myself in her over and over. I want to hear her laugh. I want her back! I harden just from remembering what she tasted like. She’s staring at me, a picture of innocence.
She’s beautiful and doesn’t know it.
She’s brave but doesn’t believe it.
She’s mine but doesn’t remember it.
Without thinking and wholly needing to, I indulge my impulse as I bring my mouth to hers, tasting her for the first time in way too long. I bring my hand around to the nape of her neck, pulling her closer. She doesn’t fight, it’s as though she’s been waiting for me to make my move, she moulds into me, fitting as perfectly as I remember and my hope is ignited. Hope that I can still cause the same reactions, feelings, and emotions in her.
I pour everything I have to give in to this kiss. I start gently; parting her lips with my tongue until hers meets mine in a tangled duel. Urged on by how responsive she is I deepen it. I kiss her fiercely, needing her to feel my need for her and more importantly my love for her. I’ve missed so many things about her, but kissing her, yeah that has to be top of my list.
I pull back quickly when she gasps and study her, searching her eyes and waiting for her acknowledgment that that kiss evoked a memory in her. A recollection of our past. She gives me nothing except her cute blush and my heart falls. What the fuck can I do to make her remember? I’m beside myself and starting to panic. I decide to plead with her once more. I’m not above begging...not where she’s concerned.
“Stay with me sweetheart... please. I don’t want to let you go back, but I won’t force you to stay.” I hang my head unable to look into her eyes as she tells me the words I can’t bear to hear. My chest is heaving, my heart rattling against my rib cage waiting for her to speak. To tell me that she’s leaving me... again.
She gently caresses my face with her palm and her touch still sends sparks through me. She makes me feel the same way she always did. She puts her finger under my chin and coaxes me to lift my face until our eyes lock on one another again. They stay locked, losing ourselves in the intensity of the moment. She stares for a long time until her look changes from bewilderment at my reaction to something more familiar. She searches my eyes for answers before breathily saying, “I’ll stay Kye. God knows why but I feel safe with you. I trust you.”
My heart blooms, that’s a start. She should be distrusting by nature considering the life she’s led, but she feels safe and trusts me. That’s something I can work on. I hoped it would be a quick transition but she’s worth the wait. I’ll wait for her forever if I have to!
I travelled for her.
There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her.
September 15, 2015
poems
I have not written a poem for a while. I used to write them regularly when I was having a hard time and found they were a great release. I just dug out my poem book from years ago and wanted to share this one xx
Writing has always been my friend
Like a shoulder to lean on
Without an ear to bend
Writing helps me express my fear
Without alarming those I hold dear
Whatever I feel
Whether it be up or down
Writing will be here without a frown
It has no opinions
Doesn't judge or talk back
My pen and paper
Don't care if I lack
So, whenever I have a problem or pain
I can turn to writing
And not feel disdain.
Writing has always been my friend
Like a shoulder to lean on
Without an ear to bend
Writing helps me express my fear
Without alarming those I hold dear
Whatever I feel
Whether it be up or down
Writing will be here without a frown
It has no opinions
Doesn't judge or talk back
My pen and paper
Don't care if I lack
So, whenever I have a problem or pain
I can turn to writing
And not feel disdain.
