A. Adams's Blog

Second verse, same as the first.

HAPPY 2022!

Peace.

I know. It’s been awhile. However, 2021 has felt like Groundhog Day: 2020 all over again–except old enough to drink.

Too bad I’m a teetotaler.

But damn it if I don’t need a change of pace.

But damn it if I don’t crave monotony.

Is it too much to ask to want to live in a luxurious compound in Hawaii and lounge at the beach at sunset every other day?

(Yes, it is)

*Sigh

I have so much say, but lack the motivation to really say it.

I just need to win the lottery–sans the Monkey’s Paw side effect.

I just need to rediscover rediscovery.

I need to do what I need to do.

We all do.

Even if it’s absolutely nothing.

As usual, I am sleep deprived.

But here’s to hoping for the best and leaving the rest…

Peace.

Hope does not equate to change, but accountability does.

Remember this in this very new year.

Peace.

If you survived 2020, you can survive anything.

Now, on to the next one.

2021, here we come!

That’s it.

Vote.

Oh, and wear a mask.

November 3, 2020: the day to make your future days whatever you want them to be.

ARMYs, you did it!

Let’s continue striving and challenging ourselves.

2020 can still be our year!

Peace, love, and health.

Stay safe, loves.

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*Heavy sigh.

I can’t say that it hasn’t been hard to write this last month with so many issues going on in the world that require my attention in other ways than just putting words to screen.

Still, how I keep abreast of these important human rights issues is due to someone having the courage to put words to screen to tell the truth–no matter how ugly it is–to as many people as a “share” will allow them to.

I read a quote recently that says “if your voice had no power, they wouldn’t try to silence you”–or something to this effect if I didn’t replicate it as accurately as it was said. Therefore, I can understand why now that groups who have historically had their mic cut or muted to the ears of society are running with the momentum they have, and running nonstop now that people can hear them beyond the mic.

We’ve seen what happens when people throw you a few breadcrumbs so you can stop complaining about their loaf. They go right back to turning their heads, because “that’s ‘their’ problem, not mine.” COVID-19 has made it really, really hard for people to keep turning a blind eye.

Healthcare is inadequate and too damn expensive–at least in the U.S.

I don’t care if you don’t believe in masks or vaccines, if you’re taking your germ-riddled ass out in the public–that is, around other people who are not related to you–wear a damn mask. You are not doing it because you “believe in the hype”; you are doing it because you care about the safety of those around you.

Talk is cheap. If you’re going to talk the talk, walk the walk. You put out a statement. Okay. You donated some money. Okay. Now, are you going to ensure your policies and practices in every business you run or own reflect the diversity and inclusivity you say you stand for?

You have to have a “not on my watch” attitude when it comes to making real change, meaning your eyes, your ears, and your body have to be in the trenches and ready to take immediate action.

We have to actually give a damn about other people. You know when something isn’t right. You feel that shit in the pit of your soul. Yeah, it’s scary to get out of your comfort zone and take a risk and speak up and speak out. It was scary when you took your first steps. It was scary when you went to school for the first time. It was scary when you rode your first bike. It was scary when you drove for the first time. It was scary when you moved away from your family for the first time. Living within itself is a scary experience because life, as 2020 as shown us, is fucking unpredictable, and we have no control over it.

But I have control of my mouth and this keyboard. So, I’m going to use them, especially when I see and feel that shit ain’t right. It’s not hard to play fair. It’s not hard to treat people as what they are: a person just like you are.

Black women, I see you. They have a 401-year habit of leaving you behind–in various ways–so you keep going forward, you keep voicing YOU.

WE are US.

Peace.

Health.

Care.

Love.

#nogoingbackwards

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I would like to preface this post by saying that John Cazale was an excellent actor who has been gone for over 40 years now. There’s no telling what heights he could have reached, but, hey, it’s 2020, and people are still referencing characters and lines he made famous, and that’s saying a lot for a man who made paper-thin roles into Teflon.

“Watch out for the quiet ones.”

I don’t understand why people don’t heed this oh-so accurate truth.

I am weary and wary of people who always, always, always, always, always, ALWAYS have something to say or a question to ask. Do you like hearing yourself talk, or are there just so many warring voices inside your head that you’re afraid that they will overtake you if you’re silent for more than two minutes?

I don’t know what I don’t know until I encounter a problem that will cause me to face my lack of knowledge, and even then, I will try to figure it out on my own; if I can’t, then I will ask for help.

I get giddy when I figure out sh*t on my own; it’s exhilarating . . . George Washington Carver must have felt like this when he discovered so many ways to use the peanut, and ya’ll motherf*ckers out here complaining about a peanut allergy.

Anyway, it’s my birthday month. Yep, another year older. And, another year of noticing that the more sh*t changes, the more sh*t stays the same. Just think about it. Bullsh*t changes settings but it’s still bullsh*t.

Eventually, I want to do what I really want to do: Write stories that people enjoy (or not) and make a decent living off it. I want to do that while listening to Eric B. and Rakim’s “Paid in Full,” or RM’s “Badbye,” or Big Freedia’s “Rent,” or Sia’s “The Greatest,” or Slick Rick’s “Children’s Story.”

I want to find the things that used to make my nerve-endings tingle. A couple of days ago I rediscovered a movie that used to scare the sh*t out of me when I was a kid. It was one of those straight-to-video movies, which were in full quantity at the video store back in the 90s. Usually, these movies had a cast of unknown actors or actors that were once known. However, this one had the incomparable Christopher Plummer (yep, Amanda’s daddy–I watched So I Married an Axe Murderer recently; did ya’ll know that was Luenell playing that desk officer? I didn’t, and I have watched that movie aplenty since it came out in 1993)–Plummer just became the oldest Oscar winner several years ago and a recent nomination just made him the oldest person nominated for an Oscar–in it. Margot Kidder (yes, Lois Lane), Tatyana Ali (yes, Ashley Banks), that hot dude from Independence Day that played Randy Quaid’s oldest son, and that guy that was the boyfriend of one of the twins in the Sweet Valley High television series rounded out the cast.

This little low-budget gem with a pretty stellar cast is called The Clown at Midnight.

I won’t share the plot, because, hell, the title gives it away. Just know it’s a horror film that is not as horrible as you would think. The main protagonist explained the fear factor of this movie well: (I’m kind of paraphrasing here) Imagine if you saw a clown earlier in the day doing his/her thing. Okay, not so scary–maybe. Now imagine that same clown sitting on your front porch at midnight . . . scared now?

Hell yeah!

Still, if you find this movie on the Internet, watch it.

It’s amazing how many nightmares that movie used to give me when I was younger, and now . . .

I wonder a lot at why I am no longer afraid of the things I used to be afraid of as I get older. I guess with time, you do grow tougher, stronger.

That’s why you can’t tell older adults sh*t; they have lived through so much and survived . . . they’re fearless.

As I age, I have to remember to always have faith and confidence in my abilities.

I’m free to be the greatest. I’m alive.

The greatest. The greatest. The greatest alive.

I’m going to make my dreams into reality. How do I know?

I got stamina.

Peace and health.

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“You can’t hold me down ‘cuz you know I’m a fighter . . . find me and I’m going bleed with you . . . rain be pouring, sky keep falling, every day . . . oh, na, na, na.” –Lyrics from “ON” by BTS

I’ve had a lot of time to reflect–I mean what else can you do when you’re stuck in the house until maybe 2021?

As I look back at my years on this grand earth, I know that life hasn’t always been easy. I have the scars (mental and physical) to prove it. But instead of letting my hardships define me, weaken me, I let them revise me, strengthen me. I’m no superman; there’s plenty of  kryptonite that can cripple me.

But I won’t allow it.

Maybe it’s the Taurus in me: I absolutely refuse to let anyone or anything tell me when I’m done. If there’s breath left in my body, I’m “done” when I’m f*cking say I’m done, and trust, when I’m done, I’M DONE–just ask my exes.

Oh, you’re just stubborn.

No, you’re just foolishly optimistic.

So, I’m relentless and I hope for the best . . . and those are bad things?

Well, let’s talk about you and what you are.

You’re perpetually pessimistic and whine/woe is me.

You dwell.

You reject.

You complain.

You never remove the apostrophe “t” from “can.”

You’re married to your worries.

You don’t see the possibilities in change.

Rona-V did disrupt your life, but if it did not take it, you better shut the f*ck up and implement your Life Plan B.

Keep homeschooling your kids and the neighbors’ kids (the public school system will improve once there’s no one in it).

Start that business you always wanted to start but were afraid to–one that is pandemic-proof.

Go back to school; you have the time and everyone’s online now–no excuses.

Become “YouTube Famous”–sure a lot of you real people with real life experiences who don’t give a sh*t about subscribers and views have a lot of knowledge you can share with us.

If you didn’t like the way your governmental officials handled the Rona-V situation, then you gather your squad and run for office–city, county, and state–to make that change, as Michael Jackson opined.

Hot water and soap been killing germs for centuries.

So, stop being gross and lazy, and continue to wash your damn hands and your ass!

And, in the future, stop letting your children lie around in their school clothes all day; they do nasty sh*t that you have to call them out on at home all the time, just imagine the vomit-inducing antics they pull at school!

We’re going to get through this.

Hopefully, as better and more caring people.

Peace and health.