Susan Stellin

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May 2016


Susan Stellin is freelance reporter who has contributed to The New York Times and other publications for more than 15 years. In 2014, she and her partner Graham MacIndoe were awarded a fellowship from The Alicia Patterson Foundation for their project American Exile. Previously she worked as an editor at The Times and at CNET in San Francisco. Susan has a B.A. in political science from Stanford University and spent two years after college teaching English and writing in Buenos Aires, Argentina. She grew up in Michigan and lives in Brooklyn.

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Susan Stellin Since it's a memoir, I didn't have to come up with the idea -- I was living the story -- so the bigger question for me was deciding if it was somethin…moreSince it's a memoir, I didn't have to come up with the idea -- I was living the story -- so the bigger question for me was deciding if it was something I'd ever feel comfortable writing about. We reveal so much about Graham's struggle with addiction and time in prison, I wanted to be sure he was okay with sharing the details of a really dark time in his life, and that's how Chancers ended up being a joint memoir. It quickly became apparent that it would be a much more compelling book if we each narrated different chapters, showing what it's like for an addict and a loved one trying to deal with a tough situation. But that meant really putting our relationship under the microscope, which was a lot more challenging than either of us expected. It's not easy to spend most of the day writing about a fight you and your partner had 8 years ago, then close your laptop and make dinner together! (less)
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Susan Stellin Yes, although it was certainly a transition to maintain that level of openness by talking to each other, rather than through email messages or the let…moreYes, although it was certainly a transition to maintain that level of openness by talking to each other, rather than through email messages or the letters we exchanged when Graham was in prison -- and I think it's fair to say that it was more of a challenge for me. Graham is naturally more comfortable talking whereas I gravitate more toward writing, but especially once we started working on our memoir we both had to move out of our comfort zones. Writing a book together involved a lot of talking about our relationship (past and present) so we had to open up about a lot of things we might not have discussed quite so intensely if we hadn't decided to do a joint memoir.(less)
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“Her advice boiled down to a consistent theme: that we all have to learn how to live with uncertainty, because some things are simply out of our control.”
Susan Stellin, Chancers: Addiction, Prison, Recovery, Love: One Couple's Memoir

“The best advice I got came from a colleague I didn’t know very well—or at least, not well enough to know that she once had a boyfriend who had a drug problem. When she told me about her ex, I instantly recognized the relationship she described, the intensity of his affection eventually trumped by the upheaval of his constant drama. The way she put it seemed so simple: “I realized I had to choose his life or mine.” I understood that decision—it was exactly how I felt after I bailed Graham out of Rikers. But there was one question that still troubled me, more as a moral dilemma most of us don’t want to face: What happens to these addicts after the sober, sane people in their lives leave them? We all know the answer: Many of them don’t get better. We lock them up, or they overdose and die.”
Susan Stellin, Chancers: Addiction, Prison, Recovery, Love: One Couple's Memoir

“When I asked him what he meant by desire, he answered, “I mean wanting something very intensely and with longing—having something that you want to get and that you don’t want to live without, so that you become willing to alter existing habits and conditions, so that they become less important than getting what you want.”
Susan Stellin, Chancers: Addiction, Prison, Recovery, Love: One Couple's Memoir

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