Constance Daley's Blog - Posts Tagged "daughter"
Mothers, Teach Your Daughters
Young women in this country are growing up in the horrible position of having mostly bad sex for most of their early sexual experiences. This is a problem our society needs to address, and there are two ways to go about it. One is to teach young men to be better lovers, but I find this solution fairly intractable. It's just not going to happen on its own. The second solution could work.
Mothers, you need to teach your daughters that sex is something that should be enjoyed. If the man they are having sex with isn't bringing them pleasure, they need to give him an ultimatum. Either he learns how, or they get a new man. Right now girls are growing up looking for men to be handsome, kind, and rich, and these are not bad qualities for a man to have. But honestly, if he can't make you come, you're not going to be happy.
I'm speaking from experience. I had my share of bad sex back in the day, especially when I first became sexually active. The men I dated had no particular interest in my pleasure, and sex was as much a duty as anything else. It was expected of me, and I allowed it to be expected of me. Sex should never be a duty. It is something to be enjoyed. I don't want other women to spend years discovering something on their own that should be taught to them.
The old canard about men being unable to find the clit has always baffled me, because it implies that women can't find it either. After all, it's not difficult to point out to him once you know where it is. It's not tucked away in some baffling location, it's basically right in front of you, so there's really no excuse for failing to locate it. Girls, if your boyfriend can't find it, just show him where it is. If he still can't find it then kick him to the curb, he's obviously not really looking.
I'm sure a lot of women find the idea of talking up good sex to their daughters objectionable in some way, likely because there is an innate fear that their daughters will be more likely to have sex if they are raised to believe sex is a good thing. Maybe they will be. I tend to think that if you teach them to respect themselves that they'll likely still wait till the time is right, but I'm willing to grant it might lead to unforeseen consequences. But to me it's as simple as this: would you rather your daughter have good sex too early, or bad sex too late?
Mothers, you need to teach your daughters that sex is something that should be enjoyed. If the man they are having sex with isn't bringing them pleasure, they need to give him an ultimatum. Either he learns how, or they get a new man. Right now girls are growing up looking for men to be handsome, kind, and rich, and these are not bad qualities for a man to have. But honestly, if he can't make you come, you're not going to be happy.
I'm speaking from experience. I had my share of bad sex back in the day, especially when I first became sexually active. The men I dated had no particular interest in my pleasure, and sex was as much a duty as anything else. It was expected of me, and I allowed it to be expected of me. Sex should never be a duty. It is something to be enjoyed. I don't want other women to spend years discovering something on their own that should be taught to them.
The old canard about men being unable to find the clit has always baffled me, because it implies that women can't find it either. After all, it's not difficult to point out to him once you know where it is. It's not tucked away in some baffling location, it's basically right in front of you, so there's really no excuse for failing to locate it. Girls, if your boyfriend can't find it, just show him where it is. If he still can't find it then kick him to the curb, he's obviously not really looking.
I'm sure a lot of women find the idea of talking up good sex to their daughters objectionable in some way, likely because there is an innate fear that their daughters will be more likely to have sex if they are raised to believe sex is a good thing. Maybe they will be. I tend to think that if you teach them to respect themselves that they'll likely still wait till the time is right, but I'm willing to grant it might lead to unforeseen consequences. But to me it's as simple as this: would you rather your daughter have good sex too early, or bad sex too late?
