Emma Flemming's Blog

So....I had intended to have 'Withered Bloom' published by now, but life had other plans. Busy bits aside, we had a death in the family and we're under major pressure to move house.
Not easy when the country is in the middle of a housing crisis! O_O
So I'm a puddle of stress lately....not really great for writing conditions and I really don't want to put out just any old muck!
Here's hoping my muse gets his butt in gear!
^_^

It's come to my attention that my books have been added to a website known as Instanbooks.live to be used as an illegal download.

One..you suck Instanbooks! Hard enough on indie authors without that and...Two, supposedly if you download, you get a malware virus instead of the book. So it's screwing authors and our readers!

Stay away my flowers!!

Chapter One:

Flying was an ordeal. The kind of ordeal, where taking a cheese grater to your armpit was a lot more fun. Or at least it was in theory and hey, it no doubt passed the time better.
Contorted in a most uncomfortable position, Noah James shifted his sorry slab of flesh and instantly regretted it. His bones let a holler along the lines of holy hell and he was pretty sure the muscles in his ass were sobbing. That of course might have been just him.
Over six hours on a plane was in no way big fun and he had his big brother to thank for the sardine-in-a-can crap, since the son of a bitch went and...well...died. Inconvenient of him and since he was mostly an insensitive bastard eighty percent of the time, Noah had no trouble thinking as such.
It had been six months ago when Kit had been diagnosed with cancer, the untreatable kind, the kind where the Grim Reaper parked it at your door sucking down java while waiting for what was the inevitable.
He spent most of it in a hospital and about half way through his remaining months, Kit gave up and simply faded away. For that, Noah hated him and he hated himself for feeling that way, but truly, he couldn’t help it. Kit hadn’t really tried to fight. Had laid down like a dog and let the cancer steamroll right over his ass. Deep down, Noah knew he was being unfair, but his anger made it easier to hold onto his sanity.
Shifting again, he winced. Christ, this had never been a flight he wanted to make. Not for funerals, weddings or any other such family splendour. Noah had promised himself long ago, no matter how much it hurt, his family just wasn’t worth the festering wounds they left. Despite his policy, however, Kit was different. Kit had been there for him when no one else was and for that, he deserved his respect—Even if he wanted to kick his corpse for loosing such a stupid battle.
Sweet baby Jesus he needed a drink!
Dragging a hand roughly over his face, Noah grimaced. His face was as prickly as a hedgehog’s ass and he was pretty sure sleep grit was creeping toward his nose. Messy strands of chocolate brown falling about a sharp, rugged face, Noah had always been a looker. His eyes were the palest blue and he always kept himself in good shape. Too bad none of it showed at the moment.
Road kill came to mind.
All over the damn asphalt kind of road kill.
Yeah, God damn, did he ever need that drink!
Too bad he was stone cold clean for almost eight years now and he needed to keep it that way. Alcoholism had nearly destroyed him. It added a coffin nail with every glass of straight vodka and his liver almost kicked it. So much had driven him down that dark, dank hole to hell and Noah swore he would never go back. If he did, he was not coming back alive.
“Excuse me?”
Jumping out of his skin, Noah blinked and looked up. A slim woman with ink black hair stood next to his seat. A curl freely fell down over her right temple. She was one of the flight attendants, sharply dressed, with a warm smile and a single dimple in her left cheek. Her nametag read Elena.
“Hi, sorry...not with it.” Noah swallowed. His voice was nothing but gravel with a mix of Ireland and a lilt of New York. “Did you need something?”
Elena smiled softly. “We’re landing sir; I need you to fasten your seatbelt.”
“Oh! Crap, sorry.” Cheeks pinking, Noah got with the program. Trapped so deep in his own head, he hadn’t heard the announcement upon the intercom. With fumbling fingers, he slid metal into metal and pulled tight. Noah was twitchy as all hell and it had nothing to do with being up at a closer to God kind of height. He only got this angsty when his family were waaaaaay too close to his person. Six thousand miles had barely been enough distance. This close, he felt like there were ants in his pants and they were all bopping to gettin’ jiggy wit’ it.
Course, it was still better concentrating on that, then his blender of a head.
The descent came out of nowhere, the pressure of the plane lowering screwing with his ears. Noah swallowed reflexively. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a woman gripping her seat with fingers as tight as iron clamps. Prayers wiggled free from her washed out lips. Snort. As if that would help her if they suddenly plummeted.
Oh dear. His asshole was showing again. Reeling in his lack of table manners, Noah set his eyes on the seat in front of him and the tuft of grey hair visible just beyond. He was snarky and mentally sniping at strangers. It wasn’t their fault he was in a situation that was pretty similar to peeling off his own skin.
Time he got over himself.
Down, down, down and finally with a graceful thud the plane landed. A burst of speed and then it began to slow, gliding toward the terminal. Everyone clapped. Well, everyone bar Noah. He wasn’t happy about trundling along the tarmac of Dublin airport. In fact, by the way his chest was doing the whole caving in thing; he was pretty close to an anxiety attack. Joy, just what he needed. By sheer force of will, he kept his faculties on their rickety train track.
One week and he could get back to his almost peaceful existence.
He could survive one week or at least he hoped so.
The anxiety attack took over anyway.
Shit!

NEW RELEASE! BOOK ONE IN THE HAWTHORN PACK:


In the past, created, rather than born, Dmitri is thrown through life and used by one person after another.

Part of an organisation, hidden both from supernatural and humans, the werewolf follows orders, all while striving to be more than what he was made for. Happiness finally finds him when he’s not looking. But the fates have been rarely kind and it’s gone before he ever really had it.

In the present, all but a ghost in her own life, Kaylah Bannon drifts through existence with nothing to cling to. No real friends and no family to call her own. Just barely existing, until one late night fate lands her at the feet of the tall, dark and grumpy Mikhail, far from home and her life changed forever from a single bite.

A werewolf and the Alpha to the Hawthorn pack, Mikhail is not happy to have Kaylah tossed into his relatively controlled life. And a turned human to boot? There hadn’t been one in years! Keeping her put is a challenge and training her is a pain, but when he starts to fall for her, that’s what frustrates him the most.

The past and present are about to collide, with two different worlds aligning. Who will be standing when the dust clears…?

So, deep breath, here's my 2020 truths. It's been hell. Actually, in all honesty, the last 2 years have been rough--thank you Nathan Spencer Connolly and your inability to stay in the womb for 4 more months!!!! 😭

His birth led to 13 weeks of stress, quick grabs of grub in burger king and a lot of crying and sleepless nights. A further 6 hospitalizations meant a lot of the same throughout 2019, so by the time 2020 slapped me in the face, I was already beginning to lose myself.

4 years ago, I worked so hard to lose 90lbs and between 2018 stress and shitastic 2020 I have gained it all back. There are moments now, where I look in the mirror and I don't know the person looking back. I feel angry for letting it all slip away and I feel guilt, as if I let everyone down. Things I shouldn't feel, but then, emotions are very rarely logical.

I had such plans to find myself again this year. So naturally, cue 2020, nature's car wreck, with a pinch of plague and sprinkled with a touch of Dante's inferno.

The pandemic brought so much fear with it. Isolation. Confusion. Humans aren't designed for the hardships we've been put through. No matter people's opinion on lockdown, that is a fact. We are simply not built for it. Oh, our hearts were in the right place at the beginning of it all, but we're tired now I think and that's only natural. Long-term, we aren't supposed to function the way we have been. But we've got to push on.

My wedding had to be cancelled because of the protocols blocking us from even getting the flowers, nevermind everything else and though it is rescheduled for the same date next year, it hurts to know I don't yet get to call the love of my life, 'Husband.'

There have been losses this year on both sides with myself and my partner. Something that has rocked the very foundations of our families, as is normal when a loved one passes on and I haven't seen my remaining living Grandmother in 9 months. I used to visit her twice or three times a week for a yap and a cuppa and the longer this goes on, the more I feel the next time I see her may not be in the way I want to. I don't want to say goodbye before I get to say hello again and that is a fear for a lot of us at the moment.

Still....

Even through all that, 2020 has had its good points. For us;

July 2020: Our youngest was discharged from early intervention after passing his developmental with flying colours.
August 2020: I self-published my first book, a collection of poetry..and set a date for my first novel coming out in 2021.
September 2020: Our youngest reached the physical age of 2 years and no longer needs to be age corrected for his severely premature birth.
November 2020: Our eldest won a prize for collecting the most in donations for MS in his whole school.
December 2020: Our youngest was discharged from the last of his hospital care. Now up to where he should be, both physically and developmentally.
2020 had it's good and bad points. It hurt in ways that will be forever tender. But we are coming out fighting and now, we just need to keep going.
I intend to take back my life and make 2021 mine.
Here's to thinking positive and being the best I can be.
Here's to the love of family and friends. To those lost and now our guardian angels.
Here's to every life lost to do this pandemic.
Here's to standing our ground as we fight and keep moving forward!!!
Here's to a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! 🍾🥂🍾🥂🍾🥂🍾

COMING 2021!!!

“…Lost. She was lost and from the smoke wafting out of her hood, she was also screwed. This was Murphy’s law in full swing…”

All but a ghost in her own life, Kaylah Bannon drifts through existence with nothing to cling onto. No real friends and no family to call her own. Just barely existing, until one late night fate lands her at the feet of the tall, dark and grumpy Mikhail, far from home and her life changed forever.

A werewolf and the Alpha to the Hawthorn pack, Mikhail is not happy to have Kaylah tossed into his relatively controlled life. And a turned human to boot? There hadn’t been one in years! Keeping her put is a challenge and training her is a pain, but when he starts to fall for her, that’s what frustrates him the most.

With the vicious rogue who turned Kaylah stalking the edge of the territory and a possible war brewing with another pack, Mikhail struggles between love and loyalty, not sure if he’ll ever have both.