Bryan Gillette's Blog

Resilience is often compared to a muscle. Just like any muscle in our body, it needs to be exercised, stretched, and sometimes pushed to its limits to grow stronger. This memory popped up from seven years ago to the day when this muscle was put to the test in ways I never imagined. We were crossing our sixth border early on in our one-year trip around the world. More border crossings were to come.

I thought the timing of this memory was coincidental as I was just asked to speak to 100 executives on building resilience.

The Journey Begins

It all started with a seemingly simple task: obtaining our Bolivian visas after crossing from Peru. My oldest son and I were armed with about 40 pages of paperwork, our passports, and a wad of 100-dollar bills ready to face the border agent. Little did we know, this was just the beginning of our ordeal.

A Series of Unfortunate Events

As we handed over our meticulously prepared documents, chaos erupted around us. My youngest son, dealing with some illness, began throwing up on the side of the road. My wife, in a frantic rush, was trying to get a new copy of a document because the version we had was deemed unacceptable by the officials. To add to the stress, we were running low on perfect $100 bills as the border agent was adamant that the cash had to be in mint condition—no marks, no creases.

The Breaking Point

After what felt like an eternity, we finally secured our visas. But as we stepped out of the office, we watched in dismay as the bus we had arrived on—and were supposed to take to our first city—drove away without us. We were stranded at the border, exhausted and frustrated.

Finding Strength in Adversity

Despite the overwhelming challenges, we didn’t give up. We managed to find a way into town, locate a pharmacist for some much-needed medicine, and eventually get something to eat. It was a day filled with stress and uncertainty, but it also highlighted the strength and resilience of our family.

What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger

This experience was a powerful reminder that resilience is indeed a muscle. It gets stronger each time we face and overcome adversity. While that day at the Bolivian border was incredibly tough, it made each of us more resilient. It also brought our small team of four closer together as we managed the chaos together.

In the end, what doesn’t kill you truly makes you stronger. And sometimes, it’s the most challenging days that teach us the most about our own strength and resilience.

In the hustle and bustle of modern work life, coffee shops have become the go-to spot for meetings, brainstorming sessions, and catching up on emails. For many of us who work remotely, they offer a change of scenery from the home office and a steady flow of caffeine to keep productivity levels up. But after 12 years of building my business, I found myself questioning this routine.

When I first started my entrepreneurial journey over a decade ago, the local coffee shop was my second office. It was where I’d meet colleagues, clients, and collaborators. However, as time went on, I began to realize that this habit wasn’t as beneficial as it seemed. Despite not being a coffee drinker (I prefer tea, thank you very much), I found myself spending hours seated, whether at home or in the café. That’s when I decided to make a change.

Instead of succumbing to the allure of the cozy café chairs, I embraced the idea of walking meetings. Here are the top five reasons why I’ve bid farewell to Starbucks in favor of taking strides outdoors:

1.  Fresh Air, Fresh Ideas: There’s something magical about being outdoors. The fresh air invigorates the mind and stimulates creativity in ways that a confined space simply can’t. Walking amidst nature or even just down the city streets allows for a free flow of ideas and encourages outside-the-box thinking.

2.  Active Body, Active Mind: Sitting has been dubbed the new smoking, and for good reason. Prolonged periods of sitting have been linked to a myriad of health issues, including obesity, heart disease, and even mental health concerns. By opting for walking meetings, not only are we getting our bodies moving, but we’re also keeping our minds sharp and alert.

3.  Enhanced Focus and Engagement: Have you ever found yourself zoning out during a meeting or struggling to stay awake after that third cup of coffee? Walking meetings offer a solution to this common problem. The physical activity helps to keep participants engaged and focused, leading to more productive and efficient discussions.

4.  Privacy and Serenity: While coffee shops can be bustling hubs of activity, walking paths often offer a sense of privacy and serenity. Away from the distractions of ringing phones and background chatter, walking meetings provide a tranquil environment conducive to meaningful conversations and deeper connections. At least until the leaf blower drowns out the peacefulness.

5.  Environmental Impact: Let’s not forget the environmental benefits of ditching the café in favor of walking. By reducing our reliance on single-use coffee cups and minimizing our carbon footprint, we’re taking a small but meaningful step towards a more sustainable future.

So, the next time you find yourself scheduling a meeting, consider taking it outdoors. Whether it’s a stroll through the park or a walk around the block, you’ll be amazed at the positive impact it can have on both your work and well-being. Sorry Starbucks… I’m walking.

In the realm of extreme challenges, running a marathon in Antarctica stands out as a pinnacle of endurance and determination. Now, imagine tackling this feat not on solid ground, but on a ship amidst the icy expanse of the Southern Ocean. This is precisely the adventure I embarked upon—a marathon on a ship, surrounded by the vastness of Antarctica.

The setting was surreal—a ship navigating through icy waters, with snow-capped mountains and glaciers as the backdrop. The track, if you could call it that, was a mere 1/12 of a mile, necessitating a staggering 314 laps to complete the marathon distance. As if the mental and physical demands of running a marathon weren’t enough, the unpredictable Antarctic weather added another layer of challenge.

On that day, the temperature hovered around 30 degrees Fahrenheit, with intermittent snowfall and heavy winds buffeting the ship. Despite the biting cold and ever-changing conditions, I was determined to press on. But perhaps the greatest obstacle I faced wasn’t the weather—it was the sheer monotony of circling the same small track over and over again.

Keeping track of 315 laps would test even the most focused mind. I explored various methods, from considering GPS tracking (which would inevitably be skewed by the ship’s movement) to pondering the use of a manual counter reminiscent of those seen in baseball games. Ultimately, I settled on a modern solution—a counter app on my trusty Apple Watch. With each lap, I tapped the screen, inching closer to my goal with unwavering resolve.

As I reached the 5-mile mark, a surprise announcement from the captain broke through the monotony. “Today’s landing will be on the actual continent of Antarctica,” he declared over the loudspeaker. This was an opportunity not to be missed—a chance to set foot on the pristine Antarctic landmass itself. With a mixture of excitement and determination, I halted my run, eager to seize this extraordinary experience.

Stepping onto the continent, I was enveloped by a sense of awe. The raw beauty of Antarctica, with its vast expanses of ice and snow, was unlike anything I had ever witnessed. After savoring the moment and snapping a few photos to immortalize the occasion, it was time to return to the ship for lunch.

But my marathon journey was far from over. After refueling with a hearty meal and replenishing my energy, I resumed my run—from the very beginning. With each lap, I pushed myself further, drawing strength from the breathtaking scenery and the knowledge that I was accomplishing something truly remarkable.

In the end, I completed not just a marathon, but an extraordinary odyssey—a 32-mile journey that took me from the deck of a ship to the icy shores of Antarctica and back again. It was a test of endurance, resilience, and sheer determination—a reminder that even in the most unforgiving environments, the human spirit can triumph.

As I reflect on this incredible experience, I am reminded of the words of explorer Sir Ernest Shackleton: “Difficulties are just things to overcome, after all.” Indeed, running a marathon in Antarctica—on a ship, no less—was another test of overcoming difficulties. And in doing so, I discovered a newfound sense of strength and perseverance that will stay with me for a lifetime.

This past weekend I provided safety support for 5K, 2.5K, and 1-mile swims. I was on a paddleboard following the last swimmer making sure they safely made it back to the finish line. On the final race of the weekend, it became very clear early on that I would be following this one swimmer for our 2.5K journey. Sometimes the last swimmer changes. This was not one of those times.

His pace rarely changed. In the beginning, he was slow. In the middle, he was slow. And in the end, he was slow. About halfway through, I radioed the course director asking about the course cutoff time. His response made me nervous.

Most races have a cutoff that if you don’t reach a certain point within the time, you are removed from the course. It is a terrible feeling to tell someone they can’t continue when deep down they want to. They have trained a long time and their hope of crossing the finish line is dashed.

When I mentally calculated this guy’s speed, the remaining distance, and the upcoming cutoff, I was concerned he wouldn’t make it. I continued to watch my clock closely and the distance remaining until he rounded the final buoy. He made the cut-off with 1 minute 40 seconds remaining on an 85-minute race. I breathed a sigh of relief and got a big smile on my face when I knew he accomplished what so few people ever attempt.

It reminded me of this quote,

“DEAD LAST FINISH is greater than DID NOT FINISH which is better than DID NOT START.”

While there were about 100 people who finished ahead of him, he still finished. There were billions who never even signed up. He was my hero today.

For a good portion of my life I have been hesitant to ask for help. Not because I didn’t want to appear weak or show my lack of knowledge but because I didn’t want to burden someone. I didn’t want to waste their time as they were likely busy. It wasn’t until later in life that I realized it is quite a compliment to be asked for help.

Coming out of college, several mentors suggested I do “informational” interviews and to spend 20 minutes with seasoned leaders asking about their job, their company, and their career path. Reluctantly I did and almost everyone said, “Yes.”

It still felt like I was burdening them until I became one of those “seasoned leaders” (read: older) and several of my friends’ college-age kids asked me for an informational interview. I gladly said, “Yes” and felt honored. Hmm, maybe asking is less of a burden and more of an honor was what started going through my head.

As I was preparing to write my upcoming book, EPIC Performance: Lessons from 100 Executives and Endurance Athletes on Reaching Your Peak, I wondered how many people I would have to ask to get 100 interviews. Only two people said, “No.” Only two.

The chance of hearing “YES” when you DO NOT ask is virtually zero. The chance of hearing “YES” when you DO ask goes up significantly.

I am starting to let them say no before I say no for them.

Imagine going back in time to January 2020 and asking your CEO if all the employees could work from home full-time. What would they say? Likely, “Pack your desk, your employment is no longer needed.” Two months later when the virus was rapidly spreading around the world, the answer would be: “Get it done by the end of this week.”

Leaders were asked to do the unthinkable. Many executives had earlier resisted working from home for a variety of reasons while others had allowed it for a few roles. Few though saw it as a solution for their entire organization. It was considered an “unthinkable” or “impossible” solution. That all changed in March 2020.

Several years ago I interviewed 100 leaders about how they accomplished some extraordinary feats. Achievements others may say “couldn’t be done.” It was all for my book, “EPIC Performance: Lessons from 100 Executives and Endurance Athletes on Reaching Your Peak.”

From those interviews and seeing how so many leaders successfully navigated these last two years, I learned that “impossible” is more a state of mind than a reality. Three behaviors successful leaders often demonstrate are that they:

I was working with an executive team to help them prepare their three-year plan. As we looked at their ideas on the flipcharts, I asked, “Does this make you nervous?” Most participants slowly shook their heads NO. “Maybe we should stretch a little further” was my response. Strategic plans should not be seen as a given. They should make you work hard. They should make you sweat. They should push you and the rest of the team into new territories.

The leaders I spoke with pushed themselves in all aspects of life like Heather, an Executive Director, who had an original goal of running 7 marathons. Knowing she could easily do that, she upped it to 7 marathons in 7 days on 7 continents. Or another executive, David, said, “I always took jobs that I didn’t know how to do but which excited me.” Or Erik, the under-40 up-and-coming leader who set a goal to be CIO for a major organization by the time he was 40. His strategy was, “Do things that make my palms sweat.”

Heather completed those 7 marathons in 7 days on 7 continents. Erik became CIO for a major bio-tech firm just before his 40th birthday. And David continues to take on jobs where the unknown often outweighs the known.

When was the last time you took on a project that made your palms sweat?

As I was talking with Jeff, a former CEO of a large software company, he shared a story of his heli-skiing experience. He had just skied from the drop-off point down through the trees. It didn’t go as well as he’d hoped but he made it safely to the bottom. He was getting ready to step into the helicopter for another run when the guide came over to offer some advice. He said, “Jeff when you started skiing through the trees, you were looking at the trees. Look at the white space between the trees and it will go more smoothly.”

When navigating through challenging situations, we often stare at the obstacles in front of us versus the path to safety. As a longtime cyclist, I was taught to look at the clear path forward and not the rock in the road. When we stare at the rock or the trees in Jeff’s situation, our brain guides us in that direction. And when we stare at the clear path in front of us, our brain guides us in that direction.

Whether on skis, a bike, or in the board room, it is good to look where you want to go versus where you don’t. While it is important to know what obstacles stand in your way, they should not be your complete focus. On the next ski run down the mountain, as Jeff approached the trees, he looked at all the white space between the trees and flew through those obstacles as if they didn’t exist. It is also how he managed his company.

Are you spending more of your time staring at the trees or the white space?

Plan A rarely works. Fortunately, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet for Plans B, C, and D. As one successful technology founder told me, “most people fail right before they were to succeed because they just gave up.” While everyone I spoke to had had some failures, it wasn’t because they gave up after the first, second, or third try.

Allie, the co-founder of a company that exports African-made baskets to Europe and the United States explained how her company almost didn’t make it when Ebola hit Africa in 2015. Having survived that pandemic by staying hyper-focused on her mission, she knew she could endure COVID-19. The first pandemic pushed her and her team to new limits but also gave her the confidence to excel through the second pandemic.

Each person had a strategy for how to deal with challenging times. Some focused heavily on ‘their why’ and kept looking at the big picture. Some focused so much on the details and what needed to be done today to get to tomorrow. Some did both. But all had strategies to not stop and confidence in their ability to move forward.

As I was in the middle of interviewing these 100 impressive leaders, I read an article about someone who wanted to ride her bicycle 500 miles. She made it 325 miles and in the interview said, “I wasn’t sure I could ride 500 and thought I could only ride 300.” She quit before she started and lacked confidence in her goal.

As one founder of a successful company who ended up selling it for almost 4 billion dollars said, “We had confidence in ourselves and believed the idea was possible?” That was a theme I heard from many others as well.

How can you increase your level of confidence?

In my interviews of these 100 highly successful and accomplished individuals, they shared many similarities. These were just a few.

Featured on NPR Radio, “With a Perspective…” on June 14, 2022

When the day isn’t going so well, Bryan Gillette tries to put things in perspective.

I was on a bicycle ride the other day when I heard a hissing sound. Then my bike started to slow down as the front tire went flat. My immediate response was, well, not appropriate for radio. I was frustrated and annoyed and wanted to be upset because of this 10-minute delay. But I quickly realized that I was on a bicycle ride in the middle of a beautiful day along the foothills of the East Bay. I wasn’t sitting at a desk worrying about some report that was late, I wasn’t stuck in traffic, I wasn’t fighting cancer and I wasn’t fighting in an unexplainable war. I was on a bike ride.

Several years ago while running 30 miles in preparation for a much longer run, I started whining to myself how my legs were tired and it was hot. It was hot and my legs were tired. But, after bemoaning about my difficult situation, I remembered a friend who was dealing with a real challenge. She was fighting breast cancer. I voluntarily signed up for my pain. She didn’t. I could stop at any time. She couldn’t. My pain was temporary. Hers would be around for a while. I stopped whining and moved on.

I learned a valuable lesson on that hot miserable day and that is people were going through far worse than I was. There is always someone who is in a worse situation. And, there is also someone in a much better situation.

It doesn’t mean that my pain isn’t real but it does help me put my problems into perspective and manage through what ever challenges I am experiencing. It helps me realize that I will likely come through just fine when I recognize that they too, for the most part, came out of their situations and are stronger.

Now back to my bike ride. I stopped complaining about my airless tire, changed the tube and continued on my way. I was on my bike enjoying the sunshine and open roads. I am putting things in perspective.

With a Perspective, I am Bryan Gillette.

Last week my wife and son were in a car accident demolishing the rear end and the driver’s door. The car was totaled. When I appeared on scene well after the accident, they had already been transported in the ambulance to the hospital. As the CHP were writing up their report, I looked inside the car and noticed glass all over the seats, airbags deployed, and clothes and water bottles strewn about. It startled me even though I had already talked with both of them and knew they would be OK. The hospital visit was more precautionary to deal with my wife’s possible concussion. But still, it scared us all.

I frequently hear from colleagues how they are afraid to do something big. And often they are afraid of the worst-case scenario. Not the realistic worst-case scenario but the worst-case scenario which can involve death, total annihilation, or financial insolvency…. Do you get where I’m going?

The human brain tends to overestimate the odds of an unlikely event (airplane crash) and underestimate the danger of a likely event (car crash). Think about it, are you afraid to get in the car and run an errand? Probably not. But then, how many of us grab the armrest when the airplane hits turbulence? Just the other day I was talking with a woman who is deathly afraid of flying. Many people who are afraid to get in an airplane think flying is too risky. What they don’t realize is that they are at more risk driving to the airport than flying to their destination.

According to the ICAO (United Nations’ International Civil Aviation Organization), there were zero fatalities on commercial flights within the United States between 2014 and 2017. Zero. Between 2008 and 2018, there were sixty fatalities (2009 had fifty fatalities). According to a National Safety Council (NSC) article titled “Protect Yourself and Loved Ones by Addressing Roadway Risks,” there were an estimated forty-two thousand people killed in motor vehicle crashes in 2020. The article states, “Our roadways continue to pose some of the biggest risks we face each day.” So it may seem it is safer to fly to your destination than to drive to the airport.

Heck, according to the NSC, your chances of dying in a motor vehicle crash are 1:107 compared to being stung by a hornet, wasp, or bee at 1:59,507. So it is safer to be eating your burger and watermelon with the bees than driving to the picnic. But it is the bee that scares us.

Despite the statistics, we still drive. We still put ourselves at risk every day. But we also look at ways to mitigate those risks. We buy cars with airbags, drive more cautiously, avoid driving after drinking alcohol, and wear seat belts.

Next time you are afraid to do something, ask yourself:

Am I overestimating the odds of an unlikely event?

And when the answer, I presume, is “Yes”, ask yourself:

What ‘seat belts’ can I wear to reduce that risk and my fear?

I am just happy neither my wife or son were one of the 107.

How many times have you looked at someone’s social media page and thought, “Wow, they are doing so well — my life doesn’t even compare”? Maybe they were ringing the bell at the NYSE, checking in at the Ritz Carlton, or becoming Global Vice President of….

I have found myself doing that at times. Several years ago, my wife, two boys, and I traveled around the world for a year. We went on safaris in Africa, sailed the Galapagos Islands in Ecuador, parasailed in Peru, swam with dolphins in Israel, stood at the pyramids in Egypt, river rafted in Guatemala, and ate an unhealthy amount of ice cream everywhere. It was amazing and I regularly posted on Facebook.

When we came back, I followed other families doing something similar. They would post a picture about some cool adventure and I would think, “Wow, they are so cool, why didn’t we do that?” And I’d feel disappointed thinking we didn’t do enough.

I kept reminding myself that we did a lot. And that often people post only their Best Of pictures and only when everything is going well. Rarely do you see when they didn’t get the promotion or failed at a project. But, it happens to all of us. Well, it’s happened to me.

Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, and Twitter often represent a person’s Highlight Reel. So instead of comparing yourself to someone else’s highlight reel and feeling depressed, try to celebrate their accomplishment then ask yourself if that is something you want to accomplish. Then figure out how.

My Highlight Real looks pretty good but it is a very small part of the whole story. Very Small. If I posted what this weekend actually looked like, you would see a picture of my youngest son not talking to me because he thought I was the worst dad in the world. Apparently, he didn’t agree with my parenting techniques.

My wife, two boys and I took the opportunity last week to go to Poland and help with the refugee situation. We raised almost $60,000 and used it to deliver $10,000 worth of medicine and $7,000 worth of tourniquets into Kiev, provide $15,000 of household supplies, food, clothing, toys, and medicine for a refugee center in Swidnica, Poland, and outfit 10 kids with Chromebooks for Ukrainian kids in Berlin who are still attending school virtually. We are working to provide additional computers and supplies for an orphanage in this town that has taken in over 2,700 refugees. There is more to do and we will support how we can.

If you get a chance to do something this exciting, take time off work and go do it. Trust me, you will be glad you did. And if you don’t know how, send me a note because I’ll help. There is nothing more rewarding than doing something you were too crazy to start in the first place.

Kudos to Szymon Chojnowski and his leadership team for all the great work they are doing to help with this crazy situation.