Nazia F. Rahman's Blog

I had just spent hours being a tourist in Chicago, when we got to the Blues Festival in Grant Park. My friend and I headed for the porta-potties – I hate them, but sometimes you just have to go. We were standing in the crowd/line with all these people waiting for an empty one. These two dudes were discussing a porta-potty that no one had come out of for a while.

“That one has to be empty. No one has gone into it.”

“Oh, you think so?” The other guy took the initiative and went up to the blue pod and knocked. There was no reply. So he opened the door.

Sprawled across the toilet seat, curled up in fetal position, was a young guy, drunk, and totally passed out. He had put the cover down and everything, re-purposing the bathroom into a stinky couch. When the door opened on him, he stirred awake, barely acknowledged us, and kicked it shut again.

The NJ Transit is commonly used to get from New Jersey to New York City. It’s better than driving, but personally I think it takes forever. There is a lot of time to be bored and notice all your fellow travelers. I was on it with my girlfriends to go on a NYC day trip. We were sitting on the bottom level near the front. We were soon joined by a South Asian father who was obviously having a hard time containing his young son’s energy. The little boy was wiggling around in his seat and talking a lot. Being a nerd, what caught my attention was when he starting talking about Pirates. Every few moments he would bring up the pirate.

“It’s the pirate again! Is he going to drive the train?”

It took a moment for me to finally decipher and translate as I noticed the NJ transit ticket collector come by again to grab the tickets of the new passengers. The kid thought he was the pilot. But, have to admit, pirate does sound way cooler.

You are sitting in the waiting room, waiting to get your blood drawn. There’s only one nurse on duty. You watch one patient go back at a time, and cry inside, realizing that it will probably be 30-60 mins before they get to you. Then the second nurse returns from her lunch break. Someone who just walked in asks her a questions and she blatantly ignores them as she finishes some paperwork. Then she basically tells them to sit down and wait their turn. She calls your name.

Oh boy. She’s cranky. She’s not friendly. Exchanging pleasantries is not going to happen. And she’s going to stick a needle in your arm!

She types your info into the system and gets mad at you for not telling her something (you were trying not to talk to her because she seemed so ANGRY). You try to be as smiley and nice as possible. After all, you have to kill with kindness sometimes. She eventually grumbles at you to let you know that she’s not feeling well. You wonder why she’s telling you this, and inadvertently stare at her face. Then she demands why you are looking at her like that.

Flustered, you come up with some excuse like that you are worried about her (actually, you just want this blood drawing thing to be over and pray that she isn’t going to extend the negative vibes to her instruments of torture). She says she’ll be okay. She sticks you with the needle and finally makes you help her with putting on the tape and gauze to stop the bleeding (no verbal instructions, you kind of have to follow her cranky physical motion clues/orders).  There, that wasn’t so bad.

You wish her a good day and she says the same back to you, and you feel a little victorious because you feel like overall, you were probably not the worst patient she had that day.

Kill with kindness. I swear, it works.

Contra Dancing is really interesting. If you are a young lady wanting to have tons of fun dancing, you have to seek out the old gentlemen that are really experienced dancers because they can lead very well. It is so much more fun having them as a partner – even if they do throw in those extra twirls that make you super dizzy. They can make you feel like you are flying!

Conversely, if you are one of those older gentlemen that are very experienced at dancing, you totally want to ask all the young ladies to dance because it makes you look like a pimp.

It’s a very mutualistic relationship. Contra dancing rocks!

Contra Dancing is really interesting. If you are a young lady wanting to have tons of fun dancing, you have to seek out the old gentlemen that are really experienced dancers because they can lead very well. It is so much more fun having them as a partner – even if they do throw in those extra twirls that make you super dizzy. They can make you feel like you are flying!

Conversely, if you are one of those older gentlemen that are very experienced at dancing, you totally want to ask all the young ladies to dance because it makes you look like a pimp.

It’s a very mutualistic relationship. Contra dancing rocks!

Have you ever been in a rush to buy one little dress in the mall to find yourself in line behind the crazy chick returning 20 items she bought online and the other crazy chick that’s paying in bills and exact change? That was me the other day in Forever 21.

While I was impatiently waiting, however, I had the opportunity to be entertained by watching these little girls – probably between the ages of 7 and 10 – scavenge through the discount bins. Not that I am really young enough to belong in a Forever 21,  but these munchkins were really out of place.

“Oh my god, I lost my money!”  one of them exclaimed with an air of drama. Perhaps it was makeover day or something, but the girl had gone crazy eye makeup, having it layered on in a strong angle like she was about to get on a runway. She and a friend or two circled the discount area for a few seconds looking for the lost money before the girl realized “Oh! I spent it on the picture!” They had probably paid a visit to the photo booth kisok I had seen in the mall.

“I don’t have enough money for this…” the same girl stated as she leafed through her remaining 3 one dollar bills. “Do you think you can buy this for me?” She said to her friend. “My mom will pay you back. The first girl then recounted her 3 one dollar bills and recanted. “Oh nevermind, I can afford it! It’s only one dollar and I have that. ” This was stated with a very serious matter of fact tone.

Just to give you an idea – among the goods from Forever 21 that these girls were interested in was a makeup bag they wanted to put their school supplies in.

Remind me to tell my daughter, if I ever have one, that no – I will not pay her friend back. Sorry, love!

Have you ever been in a rush to buy one little dress in the mall to find yourself in line behind the crazy chick returning 20 items she bought online and the other crazy chick that’s paying in bills and exact change? That was me the other day in Forever 21.

While I was impatiently waiting, however, I had the opportunity to be entertained by watching these little girls – probably between the ages of 7 and 10 – scavenge through the discount bins. Not that I am really young enough to belong in a Forever 21,  but these munchkins were really out of place.

“Oh my god, I lost my money!”  one of them exclaimed with an air of drama. Perhaps it was makeover day or something, but the girl had gone crazy eye makeup, having it layered on in a strong angle like she was about to get on a runway. She and a friend or two circled the discount area for a few seconds looking for the lost money before the girl realized “Oh! I spent it on the picture!” They had probably paid a visit to the photo booth kisok I had seen in the mall.

“I don’t have enough money for this…” the same girl stated as she leafed through her remaining 3 one dollar bills. “Do you think you can buy this for me?” She said to her friend. “My mom will pay you back. The first girl then recounted her 3 one dollar bills and recanted. “Oh nevermind, I can afford it! It’s only one dollar and I have that. ” This was stated with a very serious matter of fact tone.

Just to give you an idea – among the goods from Forever 21 that these girls were interested in was a makeup bag they wanted to put their school supplies in.

Remind me to tell my daughter, if I ever have one, that no – I will not pay her friend back. Sorry, love!

Walking down past the bars in Dupont Circle on a Saturday night, we passed a young guy wearing bright fluffy yellow bunny ears. The ears were not unexpected, as it was the day before Easter Sunday. What was amusing was the way this guy nonchalantly and cheerfully wished us:

“Happy Passover!”

Note: In 2012, Easter and the beginning of Passover fell on the same weekend.

Walking down past the bars in Dupont Circle on a Saturday night, we passed a young guy wearing bright fluffy yellow bunny ears. The ears were not unexpected, as it was the day before Easter Sunday. What was amusing was the way this guy nonchalantly and cheerfully wished us:

“Happy Passover!”

Note: In 2012, Easter and the beginning of Passover fell on the same weekend.

I wish I was best friends with a Disney employee. Seriously, they are the coolest kids I can think of. Not only do they get to spend their entire summer in Walt Disney World, but they deserve much respect. You know that Disney is forcing them to be annoyingly happy and welcoming all the time…and call you “Princess” when you know you are in your 20s and way to old to be a Princess. The Disney Corporation likes being world renowned for some of the highest quality customer service and they do have some excellent service and employees.

Yes, Disney employees. I am talking about the French girls at Epcot that notice your friends decent French accent when she orders something from a boulangerie and the Chinese girls that talk to her in Cantonese and the Snow White, Peter Pan and Mulan who spend a couple of minutes talking to you, in character, about wishing wells and the directions to Neverland (second star to the right and straight on ’til morning).

Here’s a perfect example: We were running around Tom Sawyer’s Island adventuring in a Fort when these two guys joined us in shooting some guns  (consists of pushing a gun trigger that makes some pew pew pew noises) at passersby. When we later walked out of the fort and walked into the woods the same guys pointed out that we had to be careful (since we were in range of where the guns are aimed at). While rafting the river back to the mainland, I overheard the guys chatting with a 7 year old about how Splash Mountain was an awesome ride and I also found out that they knew all about Splash Mountain because these guys actually worked at Disney and had the weekend off. Um, what? Yes, we were totally playing Tom Sawyer with Disney Employees.

They are awesome, that’s all.