Brenda Garrison's Blog

Today is the first day of fall and already I am planning for the holidays. I’m not one of those people who starts watching Christmas movies in July or has all their gifts wrapped by Labor Day. I am thinking ahead and planning early because our Christmas will look different this year because of the coronavirus.

For many families the holidays will look different because of the pandemic. The pandemic will multiply the difficult decisions of how to do the holidays and do them safely. Also adding to the mix the holidays is the ongoing division in our country over a number of issues. As parents, adult kids, grandparents, really anyone, we want to do our best to create an atmosphere where our families can celebrate and be together and where everyone can feel as comfortable as possible. We also want to consider how we will do the holidays in a way where we are putting relationships before any of the issues that divide our country currently.

Now is the time to decide how we will do the holidays and do them well so our families feel loved and our relationships are nurtured. Our relationships are more important than any of topics that are not only dividing our country. Without relationships we have nothing.

So how can you build a bridge to family members?

Start by showing love and kindness .
Make your family time a safe place for everyone . What topics need to be off limits? Can we graciously set these boundaries now? In our family we know the areas where we disagree, so we do our best to avoid going there. We know how the other person feels so there is no need to continually bring up those topics for discussion. Instead we focus on our common ground and that starts with our love and respect for each other.
Start with an apology . Maybe now is the time for a phone call to the family members you want to see at the holidays, but you know there may be a break in relationship. Start by first offering any apologies that you need to. Parents, I have not met any perfect parents. We all owe apologies to our kids for something. I have found that most kids respond well to a sincere apology. Something like, “I am sorry for ______ or when I ___________. I will do better by _____________. Would you please forgive me in your time?” What kid doesn’t want to hear a heartfelt apology from their parents regarding whatever issue has been between them? I know this is not always well received but you have nothing to lose (except your pride) by trying.
Now your family member is ready to talk about getting together . Maybe say something like, “Hey, we would love to get together at the holidays. I want you to know we will not bring up the topics of _____________. We will talk about other things.”
By setting aside your views and opinions , you can reach out in love. Love your kids and other family members right where they are—without trying to change them or convince them of your point of view. Lay aside the issues that separate you and focus on the person—your child, grandchild, parent, sister, brother, whomever.
Address safety issues . If the coronavirus is the issue dividing the family, what can you do to make sure each family member’s concerns about safety during the pandemic are addressed so they feel safe getting together?

Our family’s Christmas will look different this year. But the most important thing is not that we do things the way we always have, but that we are together. This year is not going to be like it always has been for many of you as well. But think about what matters most. Is it being “right” and having things your way? Or is it more important to have everyone together and make the changes for that to happen.

I am preaching to myself today. This year has been one of lots of me laying down my way, seeing things from someone else’s viewpoint, and doing what I need to do to nurture relationship. I have failed and apologized many times. But what matters most to me is not that we always agree on everything or that the holidays look the same (easy to say in September), but what matters most to me is that we remain a loving family even in the crazy year of 2020.

Also know that you’re not going to make everyone happy. That is not your goal. Your goal is to make a space for relationships to grow given the current state of affairs. No one will have everything her way. I love Romans 12:18 for these types of situations, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all people.” This doesn’t mean that we become people pleasers or try to keep everyone happy at all times and all costs. We can only do what we can do. We do our best to apologize, create a safe place, and make people feel loved. Each person is responsible for how they choose to respond.

I wish and pray for you a holiday season where you are a blessing, you are blessed, and most importantly where we are thankful to God and honor the gift of His Son by living like He would in our situation.

*For more ideas on building relationships with your kids when you don’t see eye to eye check out my book Love No Matter What: When Your Kids Make Decisions You Don’t Agree With.

 

Recently a friend asked me (in a card) if I had a grandparenting devotional that I used and liked. I hadn’t even thought of looking for one.

I look forward to answering her question in person, but instead of disappointing her with a “no”, I will share with her what works for us.

I didn’t give much thought to what kind of grandparent I would be before Grand #1 was born. For those of you who have followed me for years, you may remember our summer of “Two Weddings and a Baby”! Our oldest daughter was married two days after Grand #1 was born and our youngest daughter was married four months later. The year was full of home renovations, wedding preparations, baby showers, bridal showers, and helping with nursery preparations. I did not have much headspace left to think about what kind of Nana I would be.

And then he came! And with a bang! It was all hands on deck keeping this little guy happy and helping his mama regain her strength after a tough delivery.

As soon as I met him, I was hooked. I couldn’t get enough of this little boy. I can’t explain it, but from then on I was dedicated to knowing him, him knowing me, and being a blessing to him however I could.

As I share a few ways I intentionally grandparent, please know this is me sharing with you—no absolutes or one-size-fits-all. Also I realize that my experience is limited—Grand #1 just turned 5.

The first way I grow my relationship with our grands is to serve them and their parents. I try to help in whatever way they need. We live close to each other so this is easier than if we were a distance away.

Here are a few things that work for us:

Changing so many diapers!
Helping their mama around the house.
Baths—bath time is a great playtime for us—until there are two boys in the tub at once and then it’s just plain crazy!
Keeping them so their parents can have a break.
And now I am one of Grand #1’s PreK homeschool teachers.

 

Relationships are important to me. As I said earlier, I am hooked on our two little grands. I am so thankful I can be in their lives. Any time I can be with them is an opportunity to get to grow our relationships. All the little things—changing a diaper, giving a bath, feeding or dressing them—are the perfect time to chat and play with them. Just as with my other relationships, being there is so important to growing in relationship.

As our grands grow playtime becomes an important part of our relationship. I play with them whatever they want to play. I cannot tell you how many times I have built the train track, including the bridge, only to have a two-year-old bump it and knock it down and cry, “Choo-choo, Choo-choo!” This summer we have played so much baseball! Both boys have learned how to hit a baseball. I have thrown many pitches and chased many balls. All this activity keeps me young! Investing in their play tells them they are important to me.

Listening is crucial to growing my relationship with them and being a positive influence in their lives. Right now Grand #2 can say a few words, but he rattles on in gibberish just like he is speaking in complete sentences that we understand. His Pops and I build a relationship with him by listening and responding as if we understand his story. And the need to be a good listener will continues as he grows. I love this quote by David Augsburger—

“Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.”

We all want and need to be heard to feel loved. And that is what I want for our Grands—for them to know they are loved no matter what.

Endorsing Mom and Dad—A big part of being Nana and Pops is to respect and honor what my daughter and son-in-law say. They are the number ones in their lives. I am the support staff. I had my chance at parenting and now it is their turn. I get to do the fun stuff like impromptu water fights on the deck after a rain or teaching them to spit—just in case a bug flies into their mouths (you never know!).

Sharing My Faith and Teaching about God—I try to make this a lifestyle. We talk about God in nature. We pray before meals, at bedtime, and any time we need “to ask Jesus to help us not be naughty.” We read from The Jesus Storybook (so good!).

As I said, I am early in this grandparenting game and I don’t pretend to have it all figured out. But I feel the items I talked about above are more like principles and less of a how-to. Service, growing in relationship, being interested in what they’re interested in, listening, helping them respect Mom and Dad, and talking about God—all things that work to build relationship no matter the age of our Grands.

I have not done this grandparenting thing well all the time. I have messed up and apologized a lot. But we are all human and in process together. The most important thing is to be in your grandchildren’s lives as best you can. You truly are a gift to your grands.

*David W. Augsburger, Caring Enough to Hear and Be Heard

 

 

 

 

 

For me yesterday, for all intents and purposes, was fall. Yep, it’s still warm and sticky here in central Illinois and very, very few trees have started to turn into their magnificent fall wardrobe. But for me the page has turned—two of the kids left Saturday to go back to school and work. We visited two others in July. And yesterday I started homeschool pre-K with our Grand #1. Summer activities are over and fall activities have started.

My daughter Kelsey and I recently talked about how surprised we were at the good summer we had—given the way it started. Like many of you we were very disappointed to have to cancel our summer vacation with the whole family. Many of our usual summer activities were cancelled and what few were open we crowded passed our level of comfort.

But we had a fun summer. I have talked about this previously, and it is still a real thing—we made the most of our moments. We took advantage of what we could do instead of focusing on what we couldn’t do.

We–

~Made jam—with both Grands in the house!

~Tended the garden like never before. For the Grands it was a real adventure to pick whatever small amount of produce my sad little garden yielded. To them it was the best garden ever (second to their Daddy’s!).

~Both boys learned how to hit a baseball and throw it.

~Shucking corn was also a real event for them.

~We celebrated five family birthdays.

To say it simply—we made a big deal out of small, everyday things. And it was so fun.

My point in this rambling story—This has been a hard year. (Can I get an Amen!) And God continues to bless us and give us gifts. It’s up to us to be alert to them and grateful for them.

I truly hated to miss our family vacation. Yet we were able to see all the kids in a different way than usual. That was a sweet gift that I am forever thankful for.

I am sorry that it is not safe for Grand #1 to return to preschool this fall, but I am so honored to be a part of the team that gets to teach him—being one of his first teachers!

I am sorry my niece and nephew were not able to have a graduation ceremony with the whole family there. But the extra support and encouragement from family, friends, and the community has been heartwarming.

The thing I continually return to for peace and comfort this summer is gratitude. Gratitude reminds us that God is faithful. He is for us.

As fall creeps onto your calendar, join me in thinking about the gifts of the summer you might not have had in a normal year. Then let’s hold our hands open to God for whatever gifts He has for us this fall.

 

 

I’m tired more than I used to be. Is it menopause, one of the consequences of living in a pandemic, keeping up with two young grandsons, or life in general—or most likely a combination of all three?

Whatever the cause, one thing I’ve learned is that God gives me stamina and strength when I need it—caring for loved ones, planning weddings, home renovation, etc. But the rest of the time when I’m tired, that’s God’s invitation to me to rest.

Sitting down for a bit in the afternoon
Sunday naps
A day at home with no schedule to catch up and think
Whatever feeds my soul

Maybe you are smarter than me and have figured this out. But if you’re like me and you need permission to be kind to yourself, here it is—

Be Kind to Yourself.
Rest when you are tired or better yet, before you get tired.
Do at least one thing each day that feeds your soul. (As a young mom of three kids that was my ten minutes in the shower while Gene held a crying infant!)
Letting go of the need to hustle. The struggle is real. The message is everywhere but if there was ever a season to let go of the hustle, it is now. Soak in being with those you are present with. Soak in the gifts of each day. God will get us where He wants us so enjoy the ride with Him. He will tell you what you need to know when you need to know it.

Start this weekend. Breath. Nap. Be kind to yourself.

Because when I’m rested, I’m a better person. I hear and obey God better. I’m more loving, patient, and kind to others. I’m more creative. I’m a better me.

During the ongoing pandemic my schedule has been severely pruned. At times it felt like I’m not doing much for God or anyone else. It has taken me quite a while to figure out and adjust to my new normal.

Doing life one day at a time was all I could manage. But now I’m ready for a little self-evaluation and looking towards what God has for me next in this “new normal.” This week as I read about Gideon* God showed me He indeed has important work for me and it is right in front of me.

As I read in Judges 6 a couple of things caught my attention—

First, God tells Gideon to tear down the altar to Baal and the idol and use them to sacrifice one of his father’s bulls. This was his declaration to himself and others that he was turning from his past to follow God and be the new person God was calling him to be—“a courageous warrior” (verse 12). This was quite a change in perception for the frightened young man who was hiding out in the winepress. He did not have a great opinion of himself either. He whined that his clan was the weakest and he was the youngest in his family.

God gives Gideon his mission. “Go in the strength you have and rescue Israel”. Even though Gideon believed himself to be weak and he was living like he was powerless, God knew otherwise. God had given him strength he didn’t know he had. He only needed to act on it to make a difference in his world.

God makes it clear to Gideon, “Have I not sent you?” It’s like God saying, “What do you need an engraved invitation? Get going!”

How often do we doubt the call of God when He makes it clear to us? Even in this pandemic when so much of our lives has been cancelled or postponed, God brings us opportunity after opportunity of ways to make a difference for Him in our world.

Recently I have come across two questions that give me clarity for my mission for each day.

The first—

What has God given me to steward today?** How will I steward my time, home, health, relationships, word from the Lord, spiritual gifts, anything God gives me today?

And the second—

How am I discipling those in my little world?***

How will I encourage, bless, and inspire those in my world? I believe I have the possibility to have more impact in my little world—those with whom I have personal relationships more than anything I can do in the bigger world.

But think about it.

My husband has one wife—me.

My kids have one mom—me.

My Grands have one Nana—me.

No other person can be to them who I am.

If I fail the people who are dearest to me, what is the point of anything else? They are my first and foremost priority from God.

And your people need you as well.

And then God gives Gideon the big how—“I will be with you.”

That is it. That is all we need for whatever job God gives us. He is with us. He will give us strength, courage, and direction, but we must be attentive and obedient to what He shows.

Before Gideon could move on his call, he not only needed to turn from his sinful lifestyle of worshipping idols, but he needed to leave behind his defeatist attitude.

I thought—What do I need to leave behind so I can be and do all God is calling me to? I made a list of what I feel I need to turn from.

Doubt—I almost always have the whisper of doubt on my shoulder saying things like—who do you think you are, your writing is not good enough to matter, in fact you’re not enough. I doubt what I write will resonate with anyone.
Fear—Then my thoughts move to fear—fear that someone will blast me for something I write.
One last thing—Actually I don’t have words for it, but I feel it. There is something that keeps me from being as bold as I need to be for God. I’m asking God for His wisdom on this one.

After Gideon tore down the altar and idol, and said yes to God, “the Spirit of the LORD clothed Gideon with power.” He called his people to arms and his army began to assemble. Just a little while earlier they were all hiding out in caves, mountains, and strongholds in fear of their enemies. Now they have confidence in God and they are ready to fulfill their mission.

My takeaway for you and me:

We’re stronger than we think. God has said so.

Step out in the strength we have and watch as God gives us more and more. God is with us in whatever He gives us to do (verse 16).

Our world, big or small, needs us to be and do the person God called us to be. Our people need us to be who God made us to be—not a cookiecutter clone of what we see on social media, but fully being the person He made each of us to be.

Even in the ongoing pandemic, what is one thing you feel God is calling you to do? What do you have to steward today or who do you need to be there for?

I would love to hear about your experience.

 

*Read full account of Gideon in Judges 6-8.

**From Ruth Chou Simons

***From Lifeway Women’s August 2020 monthly Bible Reading plan

https://lifewaywomen.com/2020/07/23/know-his-word-august-2020-reading-plan/

 

 

Note: I understand the difficulty parents face when deciding on what “back-to-school” will look like for their family. What I share today is our family’s experience. I respect what each parent decides is best for their family. There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to parenting. 

This August I am going back to school—back to preschool!

My daughter and husband decided to keep our oldest grandson home from Pre-K this fall. My daughter asked me to help homeschool him. I jumped at the opportunity.

First you need to know, I have never homeschooled anyone. I am not a teacher. I basically have no qualifications for this role except I love this little guy so very much and want to do whatever I can to help him and his parents in this difficult time.

I am so excited! I will have him two mornings a week. We will have class in the treehouse—our own one-room-one-student school. We have the whole backyard and lake for nature lessons and math and beautiful spots to sit and read.

I get to see his face light up when he catches on to something new. I get to celebrate his little daily successes as he learns the alphabet, numbers, and whatever else his mama gives us to do.

A few months ago I thought our time together was going to be limited because he would be in school five days a week. But things changed. Now I have the opportunity to not only be with him more, but to invest in his education by being one of his first teachers. What a gift.

In the midst of my excitement is also my grandson’s disappointment that he will not returning to preschool this fall. I, too, am sad for him because he will not be in his wonderful preschool making new friends. He is so ready to be with other kids. I know this was a hard decision for his parents and they are doing what is best for him. I am also disappointed that my fall Bible study is paused indefinitely.

I wonder how are you reacting to changes in your fall plans. Disappointment, frustration, discouragement? Is it taking your breath away? Do you need a minute to regroup and figure out what the next few weeks or months will look like for you?

Last month I followed the Lifeway Women’s daily Bible reading. Its focus was dealing with stress and change. One truth I saw over and over in the different stories and teachings is that the thing God uses for His glory is often what He uses for our good. Let me explain. Everything that God allows in our lives is for His glory and our good. But what I saw in these passages was that many times these were the same things. The same thing that brought God glory was for the good of the person in the story.

For example, in Mark 4 Jesus and His disciples are in a boat crossing a lake when a huge storm comes. Jesus speaks to the storm and the storm stops. God was glorified when the disciples saw the power of Jesus and started their process of believing He truly is the Son of God. The disciples’ good is that they saw the power of God in Jesus and that He truly is the Son of God. They would need to truly believe this in order to spread the Gospel after Jesus returned to heaven. Also in this same story, God is glorified when the storm obeys Jesus and stops. The disciples’ good is that the storm stops and they are safe and no longer afraid.

Do you see what I mean? The same thing both glorified God and was for their good.

Of course, we can’t always or immediately see how God is glorified or how something difficult is for our good. But we can be in a posture that is on the lookout for God working in our lives. And we can know that God is always working on our behalf because He loves us. And that is always for God’s glory and our good.

So whatever changes or disappointments we are facing, how about we ask God to help us see His glory and how we can cooperate with Him for our good and the good of others?

Let’s look beyond the changes and disappointments to the new opportunities we have instead. God will meet us where we are.

 

This summer I’ve been making two lists. The first list I actually started in the spring. It is a sad list of what I didn’t get to do as a result of the pandemic.

The second list I started after I finally accepted the reality of our new normal—at least for the foreseeable future. It is the list of what I did get to do instead of what I didn’t get to do.

 

My first list—

What I didn’t get to do—

Family vacation with the whole family

Finish leading my women’s Bible study at church

My usual errands with ease

Go to my niece and nephew’s high school graduation

Go to one of my best friend’s daughter’s high school graduation open house

Going to church

Talking to people face-to-face with no fear of germs

 

After I grieved my list and said goodbye to my pity party, I started paying attention to all the gifts God is giving me in the midst of this crazy time.

Below is my second list.

What I did do instead—

Lots of play time with the Grands. We have played in the yard and treehouse more than we would have normally because no one had any other place to be. We have watched the garden grow and pick the veggies as soon as they ripened—the same with the raspberry bushes. We have watched the endless antics of the geese on our little lake. Grand #2 gets so excited when the geese are here. It’s a real event for him.

A couple of our kids came home for a few days. We had the best July 4th—games in the yard, eating outside, and then one of our neighbors treated us to an amazing fireworks display. No crowds, no sitting in traffic to get out of the parking lot, no long drive home. It was the best day.

We went to see a couple of the kids for a few days. It’s always so fun to see them in their own space. The guys built a piece of furniture together. My daughter and I took a couple of safe-socially-distanced outings. We found a farm market with the best peaches and zinnias to pick. My son-in-law taught me about cooking with okra, something I have never done. We got a real flavor of living in the South, especially when I asked for “regular” iced tea at Chik Fil A and the server said, “What is regular tea?” She only knew of sweet tea. It was a classic Yankee meets the South moment.

Instead of my usual summer busyness, I am taking time to soak in the moments. I know I say this often, but it is true. I am learning to see and savor what or who is in front of me—

~Coffee

~Our deck and backyard

~My little writing desk in our treehouse

~Fresh produce

~The morning sky

~Time with Gene and the girls, either in person or on the phone

I also am learning to cook more vegetarian after learning more about the Blue Zones and the healthy people who live in them.

I miss not seeing my friends and the ease with which I used to live my life. But what I have received instead is the gift of really enjoying the simple parts of my life that I used to take for granted. The pandemic has forced me to slow way down, look to God, and see what He has for me. It’s been really good.

Yes, I wish the virus would disappear tomorrow. But until it does (and hopefully even after it does), I will do my best to thoroughly enjoy each moment and squeeze every bit of life from it.

I would love to hear what gifts from God are you savoring in this time of slowing down and being at home more.

One thing God has taught me in this pandemic is nothing in our earthly life is guaranteed (It never has been, I know.) And for this reason, I need to enjoy and savor every moment. That’s a big assignment but pausing in as many moments as I can makes it doable.

Reminding myself of Scripture helps me be in the moment, calm my worries, and breathe in more deeply the presence of God. It might be just a verse or two or it may be a lesson I learned in my morning time in the Word. Whatever it is, God uses it to speak to the need in my heart.

This morning that Scripture was Psalm 46—especially verses 1-2, 10.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea . . .

Be still, and know that I am God.

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth!

 

I thought–Why did God remind us that He is God and why right after He told us to be still? What does it mean to know that God is God? His characteristics came to mind. God never changes. His character is always the same so I can always count on His—

Love

Sovereignty

Patience

Kindness

Goodness

Care for me.

I am reminded that all He does is for His glory and our good.

 

These things renew my hope that God has this time in human history well under control. It is not my job to understand it. God asks me to trust Him. To be still and know that He has me, my family, all of us.

God wants me to come to Him for strength, help, comfort, and guidance. And He will be there for me. And then I need to continue to be on the lookout for His answers—how He works in my life, my heart, my family, everywhere.

It is easy to let the noise of the day drown out the truth I read in the morning. But God’s truth remains true no matter what anyone else says or does. That’s why I need to preach it to myself throughout the day.

In the preaching of truth to myself, I am in the still moments and I see and savor the gifts from God in front of me—

A beautiful summer day

Good coffee

The thrill of Grand #1 catching his first tiny frog

The sound of my girls’ voices on the phone

Quiet

Grand #2’s excited scream when he sees geese in the backyard

The cleverness of Gene’s “Dad joke”

The list goes on all day.

And enjoying these gifts bring me full circle back to being still and knowing He is God.

In last week’s blog I talked about finding God’s joy, peace, and comfort in the gifts He brings into my life and in His Word. The need for this became evident to me when I recently examined my gianormous tomato plant. I had neglected it for a few days and upon closer inspection I noticed several large “suckers.” A sucker starts as a couple of leaves between branches. Left unattended “they will grow into their own branch but “they won’t bear fruit and will take energy from the rest of the plant.”*

Aha! That was exactly what I was experiencing in my life. I had allowed my attention, energy, and focus to be redirected to suckers in my life that were not bearing fruit and were leaving me depleted.

You know me—I had to make a list. I made a list of the suckers in my life. Here it goes:

Negative thoughts (not hard to have in 2020).
Critical thoughts of myself. I began to notice how hard I am on myself. If someone was as critical of me as I am of me, I would distance myself from them. Why did I treat me this way?
Social media. Yes, there is much good on social media, but lately it is hard to find. Plus, I was spending too much time checking it.
TV—again lots of negative and it no longer served its purpose to inform and entertain.
Comparison—Comparing any part of my life to any part of someone else’s. For me it hits me the hardest when I compare my writing/ministry with others.

There you have it—my sad state of thinking.

Now I needed a new list—one of inspiration. On the page facing the list of suckers, I started a new list—

Who/What Inspires Me.

This list was harder to make. As I said, I was low on inspiration and high on negativity. Honestly, it is still a work in progress. At first I wrote only two things—

Chip and Joanna Gaines’ recent show highlighting the shows on their new Magnolia Network.
The people on the shows of their new network.

Why am I inspired by these people? They authentically follow and live their passion even though it is sometimes messy and they have no clue what will happen next. They are positive, kind, loving, fun, and giving their best to their passion. They were doing what they do even before someone was watching. Plus, I am a visual person and most of the shows are so pretty. The beauty of what they create, grow, and make inspires my own creative efforts—cooking, baking, home decorating, writing, and hospitality.

I didn’t force anything else on my list. I let the idea simmer in my brain for a couple of days. I kept thinking—where do I find inspiration, encouragement, and insights to keep me growing?

Later I added—

The music of Fernando Ortega . After my time in the morning with God, I tell Alexa to play Fernando. Starting the day with his soulful songs and hymns is much better than the news. His music helps me focus on God and calms my spirit.
I also realized that cooking/baking inspires me. I love doing it and I feel my mind open up to thoughts and ideas that seem obvious in the moment and at the same time I’m thinking, Where did that come from?!
Being outside —being on our deck, working in the garden, going for a brisk walk. I feel more alive outside.

I’m still working on my list. I feel I should have many more things in the wonderful life God has given me that inspire me. I only need to keep my eyes open and discover them. One last thing on my list currently:

Rereading books that inspired me when I first read them. This is one of those ideas that popped into my head from God. One day I was looking for a certain book in my bookcase when I noticed several books I read in the past and was reminded how much I loved them. I thought why not reread them and see how they speak to me now. I pulled a couple off the shelf and am reading them with fresh eyes.

I share my process to help you with your process. If you’re feeling less joyful and peaceful, maybe you need to identify the joy suckers in your life. And then be observant to who/what inspires you to fully be the person God created you to be—and that is the person who enjoys an authentic relationship with God. In that place of relationship with God is where we find true peace and joy.

* https://www.thespruce.com/top-tomato-growing-tips-1402587. Accessed June 24, 2020

With everything going on in the world lately, I find myself often unsettled and needing God’s peace and comfort more and more. I also find myself wondering where do I go to find it?

God has shown me a couple of ways to return to His joy and peace.

~Be in each moment and embrace the gift that moment gives me—beauty in my blooming flowers, a candle lit on the coffee table, closeness in conversation with a loved one even if it must be over phone, cooking, enjoying what I’ve cooked with family, watching our grandsons get excited about the first raspberries of summer, and swinging on my porch swing.

All of these are gifts I can easily overlook if my eyes are not expectantly looking for how God will show up.

~But more than having a new perspective to see the gifts of God in each day, I need God’s Word in my heart and mind. I am currently using LifeWay’s Know His Word 2020* Bible reading plan. This month’s theme is suffering—Living in a Broken World. As they stated in the introduction for this month, when they chose this theme a year ago they couldn’t have known what spring 2020 would bring, but God did. These passages have been so helpful to help me see how God responds to suffering, how I can pray for those who are suffering, and see the hope in many different kinds of suffering. Among the questions I ask myself as I study each passage:

~How is God with those who suffer?

~How did the sufferer respond to God?

~How did God comfort those who suffer? How can I comfort others in a similar way?

~How can I apply what I’ve learned?

I want to share with you a few truths I’ve learned that calm my spirit, help me rest in God’s peace, and have joy in this difficult time:

God uses problems and trials to develop my endurance and character (Romans 5:1-21). I wouldn’t put this goal on the top of my goals for 2020. But think about it. Without endurance and character, we are spoiled children—selfish, bratty, unpleasant to be around. I could go on. God loves us too much to let us become a spoiled child. As we will see in what comes next, He will be with us as we endure and develop godly character.
Over and over I noted how God wants us to pray about the situation and how He answers our prayers (Luke 18:1-18, 2 Kings 4:8-37, Romans 8:18-39)
When things are hard and beyond what I can imagine and I have no idea what to pray and I know I don’t have enough strength to pray what the situation needs, the Holy Spirit prays for me more powerfully than I ever could (Romans 8:18-39).
No matter what has come into my life, God will use it for good . Again, I can’t understand this, but I trust God and on occasion I have seen the answers (Romans 8:28).
God will give me what I need to do the work He’s given me and will make me “strong out of weakness” (Hebrews 11:1-40). This one especially encouraged me. Yes, life is hard, but God, He has me. He will give me what I need and trade my weakness for His strength.
I love the story of Elijah meeting with God during his extremely down time (1 Kings 19:1-18). I am encouraged by a number of things in this story.


Elijah tells God exactly what he’s feeling. He doesn’t hold back. And God gives him space to do so. God isn’t angered or offended. He lets Elijah vent more than once.
God responds with what Elijah needs —food and rest at first.
Then God speaks to Elijah in a way he can hear . I love that. God does that for each of us. Like Elijah, we need to be listening when God is ready to speak.
God gives Elijah his next assignment and reassures Elijah that He has been working and has a plan. Evil has not prevailed and will not prevail. God has this.
Now it’s up to Elijah to move forward from this difficult season of his life and do the next thing God has given him to do. Eyes on God, not the enemy.

Life is crazy currently. But none of it is too big for God. Pray, pour out your heart to God. Leave it with Him. Get in His Word. Receive His peace and comfort and joy. Then do the next thing He gives you to do. And don’t forget to enjoy the gifts He gives you each day.

*LifeWay Women’s Bible reading plan