Francesca Hogi

“Number one - READY. I am ready for a relationship. I have coached more people that I can count through heartbreak after a relationship ends when this basic common ground understanding was never established. Being able to articulate what you were seeking romantically is the baseline of higher level dating. If you wanted to buy a house, wouldn’t you establish the house was for sale before you started touring it and measuring it for drapes? Asking if the house is for sale does it mean you decided to buy the house? It doesn’t guarantee your offer would be accepted even if you did. It simply means it’s a basic possibility you might choose to explore just as your inner love program is always guiding your romantic decisions. The same goes for everyone else. Another person‘s readiness for a relationship is independent of you. Someone could be head over heels in love with you and still not be ready to commit. That’s the confusion I want you to avoid. Discussing this upfront is asking what kind of relationship are you ready for at this point in your life? Not do you want to be with me forever. Some people who are less involved on their love journey than you, might attempt to shame or gaslight you into thinking you have no right to ask this question or that by asking you’ll scare off a potential match. If someone doesn’t have the maturity to know the difference between “is the house for sale” and “will you please sell me your house”, I would argue the are doing you a favour by taking themselves out of the equation. Don’t worry the wrong people leaving make space for the right ones to arrive.”
― Francesca Hogi, How to Find True Love: Unlock Your Romantic Flow and Create Lasting Relationships