Ellen Marie Wiseman's Blog

I wrote an opinion piece for Vanity Fair based on the research I did for my upcoming novel, THE ORPHAN COLLECTOR. Here's the link:

https://www.vanityfair.com/style/2020...

The Orphan Collector

If you’re a soon-to-be published author, you’re probably a little nervous about presentations and book clubs. Okay, maybe you’re terrified. (I was!) Among a million other things, you might be wondering…

Do real authors worry that someone will ask a question they can’t answer? Do real authors make sure they're wearing socks with no holes in them in case they’re asked to take off their shoes in someone’s home? Do real authors worry their mind will go blank in the middle of a sentence? Do they worry they’ll be compared to other novelists? Do they spill their wine and talk with spinach in their teeth?

I’m here to tell you that, yes. Yes, they do.

Before my debut novel, THE PLUM TREE was released last year, my stomach churned when I thought about book clubs and presentations. Although I was excited about meeting readers, I wondered what would be expected of me and worried that people would change their mind about my work after meeting me in person. After all, how could an overweight grandmother with anxiety-flushed cheeks and trembling knees have anything important to say? And her book? It must have been a fluke.

Then I read an interview featuring Jenna Blum, author of THOSE WHO SAVE US, where she said books clubs helped dispel her fear of talking about her novel in front of strangers. What? Über-talented Jenna Blum, one of Oprah’s Top Women Authors, was nervous too? That was when I began to think maybe I’d be all right after all.

Now, eight months after the release of THE PLUM TREE and a dozen or so book clubs later, I’m here to tell you Jenna Blum was right. Books clubs are a wonderful way to ease into the new and often-scary “public” world of debut authorhood. After all, what could be better than having excited readers ply you with delicious food and wine while they chat and ask you questions about your novel? Trust me when I say it gives you a much-needed boost and is a great reminder of why you spent all those lonely months and years staring at your computer and talking to the dogs. And yet, like every author, you’ll eventually learn that not every book club experience is the same. To give you a heads up, here’s a list of a few things my fellow debut authors and I have learned while navigating the weird and wonderful world of book clubs.

1) Book clubs are not always about books. Although it might seem a bit strange, some book clubs don’t read the books they’ve chosen. For them, it’s a reason to get together with friends—for food, wine and conversation. While that’s all well and good, and people are certainly free to do as they please, it can be a bit awkward for an author who expects to talk about her novel. The good news is, you’ll make new friends and, hopefully, because they met you in person, some of them WILL read your book. If you’re worried about what to do in a case like this, remember that nearly everyone is interested in the process of becoming a published author. You can always talk about getting your agent, copy edits, revisions, rejection letters, word count, publishing houses, and the first time you saw your novel on bookstore shelves!

2) Sometimes the conversation goes in one direction and stays there. I know of one book club meeting where the members were so certain the book was going to be made into a movie, they spent the evening talking about auditioning for their favorite parts. While I’m sure the discussion wasn’t what the author expected, I’ll bet it was fun! If this happens to you, go with the flow and enjoy the enthusiasm!

3) Every book club needs a leader and sometimes it has to be you. One of my author friends stood by the kitchen door holding her purse while the book club fired questions at her before she even had a chance to take off her coat! Although I’d like to think that the excitement of meeting a published author caused the members to forget their manners, I’m sure it was a little awkward for all involved. Eventually, the author said, “Let’s grab our snacks and take a seat!” From there, things went well. It’s important to remember that there will be times when you have to take charge. Don’t worry, everyone will be glad you did!

4) Sometimes you’ll feel intimidated. No matter who you are or where you came from, there will come a time when it feels as though everyone in the room, and I mean everyone, is better educated and more successful than you. You might feel silly talking about your little book. But guess what? When it comes to being a published author, (unless, by chance, one of the members is also published) YOU are the most successful person in the room. The book club members, whether they’re heart surgeons, college professors or political analysts, are in awe of your accomplishment. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have invited you! Try to remember how you looked at published authors before you became one. That’s how most book club members look at you. Smile and be proud!

5) People will think that because they read your book, they know who you are. Every now and then, some questions and comments will surprise (or shock) you. Just like in the real world, people will say what’s on their minds before thinking. And sometimes, just like in the real world, they’re only being nosy. Smile, do your best to answer politely, ( or even better, with a dash of humor!) then change the subject.

6) If you’re feeling particularly nervous, it’s okay to bring backup. One author friend sometimes takes his wife to book clubs and she’s always a big hit. I’m sure partly because the book club members want to know what it’s like to be married to a published author! I’ve taken my mother a few times because THE PLUM TREE is loosely based on her experiences growing up in Germany during WWII. People love asking her questions. I always say the more the merrier, and I imagine most book clubs feel the same way. But remember, every situation is different. If there is a formal dinner being served or restaurant reservations are being made, it’s best to ask first. Most book clubs offer to pay for the visiting author’s meal, but you can't expect them to pay for your guest. As a side note, if the meeting is being held in a restaurant, order something easy to eat (unless you don’t mind slurping spaghetti while fifteen people watch) and be prepared to take most of your meal home. You’ll be talking too much to put food in your mouth!

7) Every book club is different. And that’s what makes them so interesting and fun! Here I quote an author friend: “Each one has its own flavor unique to the members attending. I love the challenge and surprise those unique differences present. It's a little bit like improv theater. At one meeting, to my amazement, the conversation became so animated between the readers it was as if I was no longer in the room but watching behind one of those two-way mirrors they use in police stations or child psychologist clinics. Finally, one of the members turned to me and asked—how does it feel to have a bunch of strangers talking about you and your book as if you’re not here? I was speechless. It took me a few seconds to finally nod and smile and say, "Oh, it's great, carry on." I was in author heaven.

8) Some book clubs start with wine, continue to more wine, and finish with wine. This can be loads of fun or extremely awkward, depending on your temperament. In the case of one woman becoming so intoxicated she insisted the author examine her teeth, it was probably crossing the line a wee bit. But hey, to each their own. Everyone has their own version of entertainment! It’s best to laugh and chalk it up to experience. (and help with character building for your next book)

9) The best book clubs are those where the members are willing to share their personal stories. Here I quote another author friend—“Sometimes it can almost turn into a group therapy session. But it's interesting to hear how your book connects to their experiences, sometimes in very unexpected ways. In a book club, you get a chance to go beyond "I get it" and really get to know your readers.” For me, this is the most rewarding thing about book clubs!

10) Always be prepared to do a presentation. One book club I visited had rented a room in a historic downtown club. I was familiar with the building and assumed they would be gathered in one of the small side rooms. Imagine my surprise when I saw a sign that said the book club meeting was in the BALLROOM. When I walked in and saw the linen-covered tables, a buffet, and crystal chandeliers, I was certain there had been a mistake. Clearly, the ballroom had been set up for a formal party or wedding reception. Even the chairs were covered with white linen. As it turned out, FIVE local book clubs had gotten together to rent the ballroom, all to meet little old me. Imagine that. I quickly realized they were expecting a presentation and said a silent thank you to the author Gods that I had my notes and props with me.

11) No matter what happens, remember that book clubs are supposed to be FUN!!
Ellen Marie Wiseman

I’m writing this on the day of the tragic shooting in Connecticut, searching for the desire to do anything but shut off my computer and drive to my son’s house, to kiss and hug my grandbabies and never let them out of my sight. My mind is numb, my thoughts with the innocent victims and their families. I haven’t watched the news and I don’t need to; Facebook has become the new face of instant information. I know all I need to know. As a mother and grandmother, just thinking about those murdered children and the unbearable grief that the parents and grandparents will have to live with for the rest of their lives is almost too much to bear. I feel like I have a boulder in my chest.

And yet I have a job to do, one that today, requires me to write two blog posts and finish an author Q & A. With my novel coming out on Christmas Eve and a new grandson due any day now, I need to cross as many things as possible off my to-do list whenever I can.

So here I sit trying to think of something useful to say to other debut authors, to offer sage advice or a helpful tip so they will know what to expect on their journey towards publication. But words escape me.

And yet, maybe on this day of all days, the most important lesson of all can be learned.

As authors, we’re consumed by reviews and blog posts and Amazon rankings and SALES. We give up sleep to finish copy edits. We say no to time with family so we can make our weekly word count. We stay inside on warm summer days, hunched over our computers while our children play and laugh in the backyard. We write just one more page instead of going for a walk or lingering over the newspaper and pancakes on Sunday mornings.

I once read about a famous author who said that the months leading up to the release of his first novel were the hardest of his life. I’ve heard that the stress of launching a book has been known to bring famous celebrities to their knees. I’ve been told that it will be one of the most exhausting things I’ll ever do, that it will give me more problems, not fewer.

And yes, waiting for my novel to drop is terrifying, all consuming, and has kept me busier than I could have ever imagined. There is so much to do: write book two on a deadline, network on Facebook, Twitter, and Goodreads, answer the daily landslide of emails, contact reviewers, mail out ARCs, assemble a street team, set up a website, make a book trailer, visit bookstores and libraries, write personal notes to book reviewers, sellers and readers, design postcards and business cards, write blog posts, answer interview questions, set up giveaways, schedule book club visits, and keep track of expenses. All this is to be done while keeping my house clean, doing laundry, cooking, and trying to be a good daughter, wife, mother, and grandmother. (I’m in complete awe of anyone who becomes a published author while holding down a fulltime job!) To add to my stress, my husband and I are trying to recover from near financial ruin, and I need to know if this is going be my career or if I should start applying at the nearest WalMart. I don’t need to make a lot of money, just enough to supplement my husband’s meager income. The hard reality is that the course of my life will be determined by how well my first novel does. It’s a lot of pressure.

But I’ve been through worse.

I think that’s why, overall, I’ve been handling the journey towards publication pretty well. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have days when I felt like I was going to have a meltdown, when I wondered what possessed me to pursue this career. I think that’s normal for any author.

But I’ve made a decision, and I was reminded of it today by what happened in Connecticut.

When I feel on the verge of crying or pulling out my hair in frustration, I think about my grandparents trying to keep their children fed and alive during WWII. I think about my mother watching my sister being kept alive by life support after she suffered a severe head injury in a car accident. I think about my mother taking care of my sister at home, feeding and bathing and dressing her comatose body, a body that refused to die even though my sister was long gone—for twenty-three gut-wrenching years. I think of the millions of people in this world who have it so much worse than I can even imagine.

I remind myself that my Amazon ranking or forgetting a blog post isn’t worth losing sleep over, that missing an opportunity to get the word out about my novel is not worth a panic attack, a rise in blood pressure, or an upset stomach. What matters is reading a bedtime story to my grandkids, having drinks with my friends, making love to my spouse, hugging my neighbor, or taking my elderly mother out to lunch.

My book comes out on Christmas day, but I won’t let myself obsess over the fact that amid the holiday chaos, The Plum Tree might not make it onto bookstore shelves until after New Year’s, or how much better it might have done had it been released before Christmas instead of after. Instead I’ll be snuggling my new grandson and watching my granddaughters’ eyes light up when they open their presents. I’ll be cherishing their giggles, rosy cheeks, and soft, sweet voices. I’ll be sitting at the table with my family, drinking in their beautiful faces and telling them how much I care. I’ll be grateful for every moment in the kitchen with my mother and brother, talking and laughing while we cook and wash pots and pans. Those are the things that make this life worth living.

So I guess my advice to debut authors is this: If you want to stay sane through this journey and survive it without any regrets, your priority has to be family and life. Getting a novel published is pretty amazing and I plan to celebrate my accomplishment. But life is too short to be consumed by reviews and rankings and sales. The unthinkable can happen. To any of us. I think if the children and parents of Newtown could tell us one thing, it would be this: Live life to the fullest.

You can make that decision now.

On August 10th 2011, at precisely 3:10 pm, I was sitting on the examining table at my doctor’s office, waiting impatiently for him to come in and prescribe antibiotics for my stubborn bout of sinusitis. One minute I thought I was having the worst sinus headache ever, the next I felt like John Travolta in the movie “Phenomenon” where he suddenly develops special powers after seeing a bright light in the sky. In a flash of what felt a lot like ESP, I was given a sign that my novel had sold.

Crazy, right?

But before you decide that I should have been seeing a psychiatrist instead of a general practitioner, let me explain what happened.

Minutes earlier, after taking my vitals, the nurse had left the examination room door partway open. Out in the hall, someone was holding the latest book by Fern Michaels, a NYT best-selling author with Kensington Publishing Corp. All I could see was a woman’s tan, jewelry-adorned hand, holding the hardcover against her ample chest, right side up and title facing out, the white and pink cover like a neon sign against her navy shirt. The woman talked excitedly for several minutes, her entire body shaking, the novel bouncing up and down as if saying, “Look at me! Look at me!” I told myself I was imagining things. Seeing the newest novel by a best-selling author from one of the two publishing houses who’d requested my novel three weeks earlier did NOT mean my novel had sold and I'd soon see my name on a Kensington cover. It was a coincidence, nothing more. People read books at the doctor's office all the time. Maybe I had a fever. Maybe I needed a nap. By the time I left the doctor’s office, I’d come to my senses and forgotten all about it.

Then, when I got home, my husband said my agent had called at 3:10, the exact same time Fern Michael’s book had been playing peek-a boo with me through a crack in the examining room door. My agent wanted me to email him as soon as I returned. Shaking, I emailed my agent, took the phone in the den, and waited. Finally, the phone rang. My agent said we had an offer from the editor-in-chief at Kensington for a two-book deal. For the first time in my life, I was speechless. “Yeah?” I managed. “You don’t sound very excited,” my agent said. Finally, I found my voice. “Are you kidding?” I said. “My heart is pounding out of my chest!”

Once I could speak again, my agent and I talked for over a half an hour. My husband and daughter kept opening the door and looking in at me with wide, questioning eyes. I smiled, gave a ‘thumbs up’, and shooed them away. Finally, I hung up and shared the news. I sold my novel! Wiping away tears of joy, I tried to remember everything my agent said. After hugs and congratulations, a rush of adrenaline raged through my body. It was like a hundred Redbulls mixed with shots of espresso coursing through my veins. I was wired, all thoughts of ESP and sinus headaches miraculously disappeared. I remember talking a hundred miles an hour and pacing the driveway in my bare feet, my husband sitting in the open door of the garage, nodding and smiling. This was huge! This was what I’d been working towards for years! This was like winning American Idol! Well, okay. Maybe not. But at that moment, that’s what it felt like (minus the million dollar contract). We decided to drive to my parents’ to tell them in person, (my mother cried) and we called close friends. It was a great day! And call me crazy, but I still wonder if someone or something was trying to give me a sign that day.

Next came the questions. What happens now? What do I do next? What's going to be expected of me? Unfortunately, that day in the doctor’s office I really did have a sinus headache and had NOT developed special powers. Bummer, I know.

We didn’t have a party, or go out to dinner to celebrate. Looking back, I wish we had. After all, how many times do you sell your first novel? Yeah. Once. Lesson learned.

There are a lot of other things I wish I’d known back then. And a whole lot of things I still have to learn. With that being said, here are some insights I've gained since then that may help others who have sold a novel and can't rely on ESP.

Let me start by saying this; if you’ve just sold your first novel, you’re going to be busier than you can imagine. If you have a two-book deal with a deadline, along with a hundred other things you never thought you'd have to do, you’re going to find yourself doing edits, copy edits, and promotion for the first novel, all while outlining and writing the second. That’s why I came up with this list. Some publishers may ask for the things on this list, some may not. Either way, you’ll be glad to have some of this busy work done ahead of time.

1) Celebrate every step! (Okay, it’s not required, and your publisher isn’t going to care one way or the other, but it’s a good idea) It doesn’t matter if celebrating means going out to dinner, buying yourself something nice, eating bread dumplings and drinking beer with your best buds, or lounging on the couch with your cats. If it’s something that makes you happy and feels like a reward, do it! You’ll be glad you did. (Did I mention you’re going to be busy?)

2) If you have a two-book deal, start writing down your ideas. Now. If you’ve already started another book or have three complete manuscripts stashed under your bed, good for you. But find out how soon your editor is willing to look at your ideas and synopses because the book you want to write, or have already written, might not be what your editor has in mind. If you have to start from scratch, it's best to know ASAP.

3) Write an Author Bio. Have several, in various word counts.

4) Write your dedication and acknowledgements. I know, I know. That’s the easy part and you'll have lots and lots of time! Trust me, it’s not, and you won’t. Look at other acknowledgements to get different ideas. Writing an acknowledgment is harder than you think.You can always add people later, but at least you’ll have a basic draft and you won’t be rushed when your editor suddenly asks for it in two days.

5) You may decide not to blog, but write a few blog posts anyway. I wasn’t going to blog and yet, here I am. The posts will come in handy if your publisher has you doing guest posts closer to publication, or you might decide to do a blog tour to get the word out about your book. You’ll be glad to have some posts ready. (And here I need to take my own advice)

6) Come up with 5-10 questions and answers for an Author Q & A. You know all those nice questionnaires in the back of your favorite books? Chances are, the author wrote it. Do yours now.

7) Write a positioning statement for your book. A positioning statement is like a pitch/byline for a movie. Here’s the positioning statement I wrote for The Plum Tree. It’s a little long, but I figured my publisher could edit it if necessary. They did.

“Told from one of the best vantage points for witnessing the first cruelties and final ruin of the Third Reich—the German home front—THE PLUM TREE is an epic story of human resilience and enduring hope that follows a young German woman through WWII as she struggles to survive poverty and Allied bombs, finds the courage to outwit SS officers, and tries to save the love of her life, a Jewish man. Think Cold Mountain meets Schindler’s List!”

8) Write a Reader’s Guide. Again, not all Reader’s Guides are the same, but look in other novels for different examples and ideas. My editor asked for 15 questions. I came up with 25. He kept 20.

9) Write an Author’s Note. My Author’s note consisted of the inspiration behind The Plum Tree, paragraphs describing how and why I used certain non-fiction books in my research, another paragraph about novels I’d read and enjoyed that also helped guide me through WWII, plus any historical liberties taken by me to further the plot.

10) Remember to enjoy LIFE. The life of a working author is literally non-stop. Non-stop writing, non-stop editing, non-stop networking, non-stop promotion, non-stop work. If you’re already a little OCD like I am, you have my sympathy. I’m a list person. I like to cross things off my to-do list by the end of the day. Having a never-ending to-do list is tough. You have to know when to take a break. Sometimes, even when you’ve got copy edits due and a hundred emails waiting, you’ve got to step away from the computer. Go for a walk, watch the Housewives of NYC, play with the dog, invite friends over. It will make you feel like a real, live person again. I love to cook, garden, clean, spend time with family and friends, and do yard work. Those things make me feel normal. It’s easy to put in 12-18 hour days doing everything a writer needs to do. If you have a full-time job and a family to raise, things are going to be monumentally harder. And remember, whenever you feel overwhelmed, see number one on this list. Celebrate! You sold a novel!!! And that, my friend, is almost as amazing as having ESP!!

The Plum Tree

All my life, I’ve turned to books for advice and answers to my how-to questions. During my first pregnancy, I read everything I could get my hands on about what to expect while expecting. I carefully studied every chapter in books about taking care of newborns and toddlers. When I decided to fulfill a lifelong dream of owning my own horse, I bought books on backyard horse-keeping, training, and equine first-aid. I turned to books when I planted my first garden, bought my first flock of chickens, and brought home a lamb and baby goat in the back of my car. (That’s a story for another day.)


Years later, when I decided to get serious about writing, it was only natural for me to turn to books again. My favorites are “Bird-by-Bird” by Anne Lamott and “On Writing” by Stephen King. While trying to figure out the mysterious process of crafting a novel, I read about plot, character, style, structure, word painting, the importance of character naming, and how to find your muse. And I wrote.

After transcribing the first messy draft of The Plum Tree from several legal pads on to my computer, I tinkered with the beginning, lengthened the middle, finalized character names, and incessantly changed my mind about descriptive words. I tried to use what I’d learned in books to turn misplaced plot points and confusing flashbacks into a manuscript; hopefully a manuscript someone would want to read someday. But there was something else I needed to know. Was my writing any good or was I was wasting my time? Unfortunately, the answer couldn’t be found in books.

Having graduated from a tiny high school (400 students in K-12), I knew I had a lot to learn if I really wanted to revise and try to sell a novel. After all, I'd never taken a creative writing course, there were no local writers’ groups, and I didn’t go to college. I didn’t know any authors, editors, or creative writing teachers. The only place I had to turn was the Internet.

I will be forever thankful that my search led me to William Kowalski, award-winning author of Eddie’s Bastard/HarperCollins. With my heart in my throat, I emailed him, asking if he would read the first ten pages of my manuscript. I’d never shown my writing to anyone, and now I was going to send it off to be critiqued by a complete stranger! Yikes! When he emailed the next morning, saying I write better than most college graduates he knows, I started shaking. I couldn’t believe that someone, let alone an award-winning author, thought my writing was good!

Over the next four years, William Kowalski became my editor, teacher, mentor, and, I'm honored to say, my friend. He taught me about style, structure, voice, and more importantly, how to be a storyteller. He was surprised by how fast my abilities improved, and the more I learned the more I wanted to know. It was an exhilarating time for me, discovering the skills I needed to turn my dreadful first draft into a real, live novel. I read his emails and devoured his comments like a sugar-charged kid ripping open presents on Christmas morning. Of course there were times when his edits and comments felt over-whelming, but he had warned me to read through them a few times, let them digest, then tackle them one by one. It was a necessary lesson on patience; priceless when it came time to work with the editor from my publishing house.

My mentor’s faith in me and my work bolstered me during difficult times and pushed me to believe in myself. I taped his letters of encouragement above my desk and read them often. He taught me more about writing in those four years then I could have learned from a hundred books. One of the best pieces of advice he ever gave me (mentioned in his article about receiving the same advice from his mentor) was: Always Return To the Right Foot. This advice makes sense if you’ve ever been in the military. When the command, “At ease!” is given to a soldier, he is free to do anything: slouch, pivot, yawn, etc. But his right foot must never leave the ground.

The plot of a novel is that right foot. As novelists, we’re free to wander off in any direction, to taste the homemade bread and sweet jam or explore the castle ruins, as long as, sooner or later, we return to that right foot: the part of the narrative that makes the reader keep turning the page, that answers that all-important question: And then what happened?

What happened for me was this: I worked like a dog to transform The Plum Tree and get it in tip-top shape. Then I sent out large piles of query letters, found an agent, and sold my first novel.

I owe everything to William Kowalski. Somehow, he turned a small-town girl with no creative writing experience into a soon-to-be published novelist. Words can’t describe my gratitude. With his gentle guidance, unending patience, and immeasurable knowledge, he taught me how to return to the right foot, and in the end, changed my life.

Growing up, there was nothing I wanted more than to become a mother. My children were the twinkle in my eye as far back as I can remember, from swaddling my favorite baby doll to picking out my firstborn’s name way back in junior high. What I didn’t know then was that after twenty-plus wonderful, terrifying years of working to turn two human babies into two kind, responsible adults, I was going to have another baby. A book baby.

In between child-tending, clothes-washing, vegetable-growing, house-cleaning, toy-organizing, meal-preparing, party-throwing, kid-schlepping, and teenager-wrangling, I wrote for fun and I have a drawer full of half-started novels to show for it. Of course I dreamt of finishing a book, of being published, of living the “dream”. But writing was just a relaxing hobby, a luxury I afforded myself when I had time. Then, suddenly, the story I knew I had to write came to me--another twinkle in my eye, if you will.

First, a little back-story.

My mother came to America alone, by ship, at twenty-one, to marry an American soldier she met while working at the PX outside her village. Just over a decade had passed since WWII, and Germany was still rebuilding. Her family was dirt poor, and the lure of an ideal American life was powerful enough to make her leave her family and marry a man she barely knew. Alas, her American dream was no fairy tale. The American soldier turned out to be dishonest and cruel, and my mother had nowhere to go for help, living on an isolated farm twenty minutes from the nearest town with no car and no driver’s license. Somehow she persevered, giving birth in quick succession to my sister, my brother, and me. Eventually, my parents divorced, and my mother took us back to Germany, hoping to start over. But it wasn’t meant to be. My father insisted she return to the States, even though he had no interest in being part of our lives. Luckily, my mother met and married a caring man who took us in as his own. I grew up traveling to Germany to see my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins, longing to live in their beautiful world full of tradition and culture.

Then, when I was a sophomore in high school, I learned about the Holocaust. To say it was difficult to wrap my head about those atrocities happening in my amazing, beautiful dream-world would be an understatement. WWII was our history teacher’s favorite subject, and he was obsessed with teaching us as much as possible about what happened to the Jews. It didn’t take long for some of my classmates to start calling me a Nazi, saluting and shouting “Heil Hitler” in the halls. That was when I began to understand the concept of collective guilt. I asked my mother questions about what it was like during the war, about Opa’s role, and about the Jews. I soon realized that in her own quiet way, Oma had tried to help, risking her life to set out food for the passing Jewish prisoners, even though she could barely feed her own children. Opa was drafted, fought on the Russian front, and escaped two POW camps. For over two years my mother and her family had no idea if he was dead or alive until he showed up on their doorstep one day. He was a foot soldier, not SS or a Nazi. But I was too young to understand or explain to my peers that being German doesn’t make you a Nazi, that protesting something in America is easy compared to protesting something in The Third Reich, or to ask them what they would have done if they had to choose between someone else’s life and their own. My American father had taught me that evil has the ability to reside in the heart of any man, regardless of race, nationality, or religion, but I didn’t know how to make those points. I didn’t know how to tell my friends that collective guilt as opposed to individual guilt is senseless; that retrospective condemnation is easy.

Then, over twenty years later, after another conversation with a close friend (ironically one of my former high school teasers) about how much responsibility the average German held for bringing Hitler into power, inspiration struck. I needed to write a novel about what it was like for an average German during the war, while still being sensitive to what the Nazis did to the Jews. But I also knew my book needed a twist if I wanted to sell it. Then I remembered how James Cameron used a love story to tell the bigger story of the ill-fated Titanic. And so the romance between a young German woman and a Jewish man was born. Together with stories from my mother’s life in Nazi Germany, I knew the entire novel, from beginning to end.

Writing the first draft was a lot like the night my husband and I made the decision to get pregnant, exciting and fun. How long would it take to conceive? Would pregnancy be easy or hard? Who would the baby look like? I finished the first dreadful draft of my novel in three days, in longhand, on a legal pad. The Plum Tree had gone from being a twinkle in my eye to a plus sign on a pregnancy test.

Then the realities of gestation kicked in. Just like growing a baby, growing a novel takes time. After years of rewrites and research, nausea and fatigue, I heard a heartbeat. At long last, the twinkle in my eye had developed into something viable and real. Now it won’t be long before the big delivery day arrives, when I’ll be able to hold my novel in my hands, to admire and caress it, all dressed up in its newborn cover. Just like putting my son on the bus for his first day of kindergarten, or dropping my daughter off at her first college dorm room, I’m going to be a proud, nervous mother, hoping my book baby will be welcomed into the world with kind words and open arms.