Luke Smitherd's Blog

Scroll down to check out the video below!

Well, this was very cool indeed. Big thanks to @isaac.fitzgerald for such a glowing review.

 To celebrate the launch of my new horror novel I’LL QUIT WHEN I’M DEAD — out in all formats today — we’re doing a flippin’ competition, look!THREE lucky winners will each receive one of the signed hardbacks:The somehow-in-demand Numbskull EditionThe Blood Soaked Advert edition (from the monster-hand ad).

And the Buy Me A Squllion Dollar House edition from my recent walkin’-and-talkin’ videoBut that’s not all! You can also snag some exclusive, one-of-a-kind IQWID merch:

An amazing IQWID Mug!

A mind-blowing IQWID Keyring!

And an IQWID set of Playing Cards so incredible you’ll soil yourself with every deal!

How to enter:Just head to my socials (links below), find the recent Giveaway Post, and follow the simple steps there — like, comment, tag a friend, etc.Socials:Instagram: @lukesmitherdyallTwitter/X: @lukesmitherdFacebook: facebook.com/smitherdbooksWinners announced next week!(And, unrelated — if you fancy helping your second-favourite author out — feel free to share the image below on your socials today to spread the word.)PS THE UK PAPERBACK IS NOW OUT TOO :)I really hope you enjoy I’LL QUIT WHEN I’M DEAD. Thanks for your patience with the wait, and with all these darn emails. Things will go back to normal now… although expect one this Friday when I’ll have something pretty cool to show you.Thank you, everyone — we made it!

Purchase links UK:

Order the UK English Kindle version HERE  Order the UK English PAPERBACK version HERE  Order the USA English Hardback HERE

Purchase links USA:Order the UK English Audiobook HERE Order the USA Audiobook HERE

 

Hello all. We’re now four days away from the release of I’LL QUIT WHEN I’M DEAD, and as promised, I’m doing a little giveaway.  I explain it in the above video if you’d like to watch that, but in case you don’t want to (I don’t blame you) here’s the short version: pre-order any version of the book (ebook, hardback, or audiobook) and upload proof of doing so at this link HERE (that can be a screengrab of the receipt email or something like that). 

You will then get a download of a special, one-off digital goody bag that contains:

An IQWID desktop wallpaper A very cool flyer/brochure for NO DAYS OFF, the very special bootcamp retreat that is the setting for one of the two storylines in the book; this is a nice teaser that I think you’ll get a kick out of And most importantly: the FIRST TWO CHAPTERS of IQWID. That’s 37 PAGES!

Sound good? Then get your pre-order in (if you haven’t already) at the links below and send me proof of purchase at the link below those: 

Order the UK English Kindle version HERE
Order the USA English Hardback HERE
Order the UK English Audiobook HERE
Order the USA Audiobook HERE

PROOF OF PURCHASE UPLOAD LINK HERE!
(The UK paperback will be available on launch day October 14th, unfortunately that can’t be pre-ordered.).

Thanks folks: there’s also a physical prize giveaway still to come where you can win some cool one-of-a-kind merch… as well as signed book (and yes, the Numbskull Edition is one of the prizes) coming on launch day; more on that to come!

4 days and counting! Go get your pre-order now!

All the very best to you and yours,

Luke

Unboxing my first published hardback for the first time. Quite the moment for me.

The new lukesmitherd.com has been under construction for a while so, ridiculously, my new novel hasn’t been mentioned here yet; now the site is actually functioning I can talk about it here!

I can now finally tell you that my next novel, I’LL QUIT WHEN I’M DEAD, is being published in hardcover by Mulholland Books (Ian Rankin, Robert Galbraith) on October 14th, 2025

I’ve been working on this book for nearly three years and I can’t wait to share it with you. Prepping it into shape alongside my wonderful editor Liv Ryan at Mulholland has been a totally new and very exciting experience. I think you’ll agree that the cover they have produced (on the right of the image above) is fantastic, as is the UK one (both made by the amazing . The publishing deal was actually completed about a year ago but I didn’t want to announce until I had the cover to show you. 

So what’s it about? Well… let’s take a look at the publisher’s blurb, shall we?

“Luke Smitherd’s I’LL QUIT WHEN I’M DEAD is a shadowy mirror maze of terror and suspense. Just when you think you know where it’s going, you’re blindsided by another shocking twist. I devoured it in two breathless sittings.”

—Richard Chizmar, New York Times bestselling author of Memorials

In this page-turning, provocative horror novel, two desperate souls attempt to turn their lives around, with nightmarish consequences if they fail.

Madison has seen better days. Reeling from a bad breakup, self-soothing with junk food, and totally consumed by her lack of direction, she’s in need of a big reset. When she runs into an old acquaintance at the gym, Madison is shocked by how fit they’ve suddenly become. The cause? An all-female fitness boot camp led by ex-military guru Ellie Fellowes. The course is characterized by grueling reps and minimal contact with the outside world, and when Madison signs up to experience it herself, something doesn’t feel right. The other students keep acting strangely; Ellie seems almost superhuman, and her intense motivational methods are becoming bizarre, even dangerous. But Madison is getting results.How can she stop now?

Musician Johnny Blake has been struggling with a pain pill addiction after a very public, very bad fall. At the encouragement of loved ones, he retreats to a secluded cottage to detox. But Johnny isn’t alone. Something is lurking in the shadows of his new home—a creature unnatural and hungry, one that traps Johnny in a frightening bargain. If Johnny doesn’t stay off his pills and keep his end of the deal, he will be eaten alive.

As Madison and Johnny’s predicaments spiral into the unthinkable, they will have to look within to find the true and terrifying answer to the age-old question: How badly do you want it?

Nerve-shredding and compulsively readable, I’ll Quit When I’m Dead marks Luke Smitherd as a major voice in horror to watch.

Your workout begins with reps of thrilling scenarios before stretching into an unputdownable story. All upon a mat of fantastic writing. Never has self-improvement existed on such pins and needles.

—Josh Malerman, New York Times best selling author of BIRD BOX and INCIDENTS AROUND THE HOUSE

“Smitherd pulls off one hell of a trick with I’ll Quit When I’m Dead, a uniquely compelling, propulsive thriller and an eerily unsettling horror novel all rolled into one. Highly recommended!”

—Christopher Golden, New York Times bestselling author of THE NIGHT BIRDS and ROAD OF BONES

“Captivating, unique, and an utter page-turner from start to finish, I’LL QUIT WHEN I’M DEAD shines a light on the questionable lengths humans will go to all under the guise of “self-improvement.”A must-read!”

—Carissa Orlando, author of THE SEPTEMBER HOUSE

“Smitherd managed to surprise me at least half a dozen times throughout this book. Every time I thought I knew where it was going, the next page proved me wrong. An intense, hallucinatory, journey that shows – in fist-clenching detail – how far some people are willing to go in that perpetual hunt for the best version of themselves.”

 —Keith Rosson, author of COFFIN MOON and the FEVER HOUSE duology

“I’ll Quit When I’m Dead is gripping from the first page, pulling the reader deeper with every twist and turn. Smitherd is so incredibly talented and has proven himself to be a master of suspense in this surreal, nightmarish ride.”

—Monika Kim, author of THE EYES ARE THE BEST PART

Thanks for your patience, everyone, and thanks as always for your support. This is an extremely exciting new stage in my career and I can’t wait to see what happens next. 

Go to the book’s page HERE to pre-order your copy!

Hello everyone, and as we’re not quite at the halfway mark of January I feel like it’s still okay to say happy new year. I hope you had a great December, and now it’s time to turn my/our/the filthy, lecherous Smithereen nation gaze towards the future.

So what is next? Well… that’s kind of up to you, or at least the audiobook listeners among you.

That’s because I’m planning on going back to the early days of my career and writing some shorter fiction. That’s happening in ebook format; I’ve already started work on one, in fact. But what I’m unsure about is whether to record that as an audiobook, and I’d like your feedback, if I may? 

You see, understandably, when Audible members get their one credit per month, they want to spend it on an audiobook that’s going to get them the most quality hours of listening they can get. The novellas I intend on writing would only be between about 2-5 hours of audio; perhaps not quite long enough to justify spending a credit. 

Unlike when I release the text version of a book, I don’t set the price. Audible do, and they base it mostly on audio length. Here are their rates:

1 to 3 hours: ~£4.89–£6.29
3 to 5 hours: ~£6.99–£9.79

So my question to the people whose ears I have hungrily entered in the past is: would you pay these prices if I went into the studio to narrate a novella? Again, I don’t set them, but I’m curious as to what you think. I’d appreciate it it you replied to this email and let me know if you would or wouldn’t.

‘Cos I’m making plans. This year is looking to be a major turning point for me in several ways, and I’m trying to figure out how to best navigate it all. I’m looking forward to getting stuck into some fun shorter fiction that doesn’t have the weight of 10+ years of continuity behind it (on that note, it sounds like March of the Stone Men has been the conclusion to the saga that people—and myself—hoped it would be, and that is a relief I can’t really put into words. Check it out at the links below if you haven’t yet, and yes, it comes with a recap of all three prior books at the start) but I don’t wanna go the trouble of producing the audio if people (understandably) don’t wanna use a credit on that, but also don’t wanna potentially pay nearly the equivalent of one month’s Audible membership on a book that’s three hours long, even one by their Second Favourite Author. Let me know!

 MARCH OF THE STONE MEN is available now at these links:

March of the Stone Men Universal Amazon Link

Audible UK Order Page

Audible USA Order Page

The post Audiobook Novella Question appeared first on Luke Smitherd.com.

It’s here! The wait is over! Check out this gorgeous cover by Mike Godwin and peep the blurb below!

The return of the Stone Men reaches its dramatic conclusion…

The internationally bestselling Stone Man series returns! The five battered survivors of the Fifth Arrival have reached the Isle of Skye, only to face an impossible mission: destroy the Barrier that has trapped the country and stop the ever-growing army of Stone Men. The survival of humanity itself hangs in the balance, and though they’ve been given their greatest weapon yet, our heroes must first learn how to wield it… before time runs out.

But these are ordinary, frightened, and exhausted people. Their journey will take them from the rugged coast of Scotland to the heart of England, crossing the land on foot. As secrets come to light and tensions rise, conflicting personal objectives threaten the fragile balance essential for harnessing their powers as a unit. To stand a chance, our heroes must master their unity or face annihilation.

The March of the Stone Men has begun.

Concluding the epic arc that began in The Empty Men and continued through The Stone Giant, the fourth installment of The Stone Man series promises to thrill, terrify, and captivate readers once more—twelve years in the making.

Head over to Amazon HERE, Audible USA HERE and Audible UK HERE to get your copy!

The post March of the Stone Men appeared first on Luke Smitherd.com.

How would you like to not only read an entirely new edit of The Stone Man, but also have a new foreword, afterword, and over 120 pages of bonus content and deleted scenes from Books 1-3? What’s that? Sounds good? Well how about a cracking new set of covers for the set so far… as the countdown to March of the Stone Men continues? Check out the beautiful new artwork below, and click HERE to get your copy of The Stone Man – 10th Anniversary Special Edition. Wait, it’s been 10 bloody years?!

The post The Stone Man – 10th Anniversary Special Edition appeared first on Luke Smitherd.com.

Hi folks. I’ve been quiet online for a while, as you’ll notice from the empty social feeds on the right hand side of the page. So quiet, in fact, that I released two novels and, while I listed them in the Books page, I didn’t actually make a post about them on the main feed of the website… so the home page still shows The Empty Men! There’s going to be a lot of activity coming between around November to April, and as a precursor to that, here at least are the two books I’ve released since my last post: The Stone Giant – The Stone Man, Book Three, and You See the Monster. I’m extremely proud of both of these so if you’ve been following the Stone Man series or just fancy a what I consider to be a modern horror novel then these two bad boys are the books for you. Universal Amazon links below, and my apologies for the radio silence. Exciting news coming soon (for real), so watch this space; in fact don’t watch this space, sign up to the Luke Smitherd Spam-Free Book Release Newsletter. That thing is the shit, I tell you, and you’ll miss nothing. Don’t be a ring piece, get yourself signed up. Your brain and loins will thank you.

Luke

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