Andrea Lewis's Blog

 

Do you supress it or express it?

We all want to feel good, but that’s not realistic! We have a range of emotions and if we do not get in touch with our feelings, they get buried and create a baseline emotion in the body. Whatever is repressed gets expressed in the form of illness and dis-ease.

Trauma, experiences and memories are stored in the body and when it’s ready to heal an emotion, your body sends you warning signs.

(Anger) manifests as impatience, irritation, frustration, criticism, resentment, jealousy or bitterness.

If we want to create lasting change and live a life filled with freedom and purpose, then it is necessary to shine light on the places in our lives that are keeping us stuck.

This might seem like a lot of work, but you’re worth it!

I’ve learned that personal growth is not “work” it’s actually cultivating a healthy relationship with myself, so that I look inward, instead of outwards to someone or something for love and value.

I get it that anger is not a very comfortable emotion for women to express. We learned at a very young age to be sweet and nice all of the time.

But if we don’t deal with our anger long enough, eventually we misdirect it at someone, something or even ourselves.

Some examples are:

road rage,

yelling at a ticket agent in the airport to book the next available flight, even though flights are cancelled due to bad weather,

nitpicking and complaining about something your partner didn’t do and

the way we misdirect anger at ourselves is, we don’t take care of our wellbeing—we push ourselves, even though we are tired.

A couple years ago, I watched a movie called “Stranded in Paradise” and there was a scene with the main actress and her mother. Her mother was upset that her daughter lost her job and was taking a break to figure things out. She thought her daughter was being irresponsible. Then her mother went on about how she can’t rely on anyone, especially a man.

Her daughter finally stood up to her and said. “Yes mom, I know the story on how dad left you when I was a baby and you were the sole provider. I carry a lot of anger and fear and it's not even mine!”

Maybe you can relate to that story. I know I can!

For years I lived my mother’s unfulfilled dreams and carried her pain, hurt and disappointment. I never stopped to ask myself what I wanted or what would make me happy because I was trying to fit in.

But the more I tried to fit in and belong, the more I felt sick. I experienced depression, anxiety, debilitating migraines and fibromyalgia. When I finally let go of the life I thought would make me happy, all physical ailments dissolved.

I created a free meditation called Release Your Mother's Pain Story, to help you heal and move forward. In this meditation, I guide you to connect with your mother to find out her pain story with your father and to learn how it played out in your life on an unconscious level. You can go here.

I’ve noticed that women sacrifice their needs-wants-desires and make everyone a priority. They learned from their mother’s and foremothers to work really hard, but they feel unfilled and exhausted. They’re doing the right thing, instead of what’s right for them.

But deep down they are angry!

They are tired and frustrated that they are not where they thought they’d be in life and they are going through the motions.

Anger has a message and that is:

We are being hurt.

Our rights are being violated.

Our needs-wants-desires are not being adequately met.

We are not addressing an important emotional issue in our lives.

We are compromising too much of our self in relationships.

We are giving more than we can comfortably give.

3 tips to express anger in a healthy and positive way: 1. Write it out

It takes courage to tell someone what you are angry about. To help you build your courage muscle, get a journal or blank piece of paper and express your anger uncensored.

If you’re hanging on to anger from the past, write a letter to that person and before you burn it, say aloud: I release this, I am no longer angry, love will heal this. Burning the letter releases the negative energy and it loses power over you.

When you write it out not only will you gain perspective, you’ll also not be harbouring your anger towards the other person and/or yourself.

2. Get physical

To release pent-up anger buried in the body play tennis, run, power walk, kick a soccer ball or dance it out. And when the anger surfaces allow it to go through you so it’s not weighing you down. Personally, I like dancing it out to Pat Benatar’s song Hit Me With Your Best Shot.

3. Become proactive

If someone triggers you and you’re upset, take a deep breath to centre yourself and be present. Then calmly talk to the other person involved by saying, “I feel angry because…”

Avoid pointing the finger or rehashing the situation, the other person will most likely be willing to listen and respect your point of view. It’s not about being right, it’s about finding a solution so you can move forward.

Anger is a valid emotion, just like joy and love. By honoring your feelings, you’re telling yourself the truth, instead of acting like everything is fine. You can express it by writing it out, getting physical and becoming proactive. It takes practice and more practice, but I know that you can do it!

 This weeks Mana cardHulu (Feather)

The message is to soar with feather to rise above limitations and myopic views. Realize that the line between your vision and its manifestation is a permeable one.

Feathers can help elevate your consciousness so that you can see where you are heading. Feathers remind us to pay close attention to where we came from, where we are, and where we are going.

How many times have you heard someone say, “I wish I had more time…” I wish I could…” “I wish, I wish.” 

The feather gently reminds you to fulfill your wishes now, for this is the only moment there is. The greatest difference between those who wish and those who do is that the wishers wish while the doers do.

Feathers provide a way to rise upward into the realm of expanded vision. Allow the feather to fly you high enough for you to see over anything that blocks your vision. Illusions sometimes appear to be real, but it is you who creates reality.

When you see the world from a heightened perspective, you gain the ability to shift the shape your life is taking. Soar with the feather and possibilities become unlimited.

If you’d like to bring joy back and start making yourself a priority, sign up for my free 7 Days To Joy Challenge here.  

 

Have you heard of the neutral zone?

It’s the middle stage in a transition.

It’s the uncomfortable lull in which you can’t go back, nor can you move forward. Metaphorically it’s a period of gestation that precedes a re-birth.

Transitions and changes are not the same.

A transition is about crossing over from something old and familiar into something new. They happen on the inside of a person and is reflected on the outside. 

Transitions change the person at their core because their values and their identities change.

Meaning, you’ve let go of your EGO identity that was limiting you to what you believed made you valuable—the car, the house, the relationship, the career, the money etc. 

Whereas, changes happen on the surface and don’t usually involve a lot of emotional and psychological shifts.

Transitions are an opportunity for you to grow!

This is what your soul yearns, to expand and grow and she will come knocking to get your attention, usually in the form of loss, to wake you up!

But your EGO will keep you chasing, rushing for the next thing and never stopping to breathe and ask yourself:

What do I want? 

What do I really want?

What would make me happy?

The neutral zone is the perfect opportunity to get clear on your hearts’ desires—to dream, to imagine, to check in with your soul, and to do things that bring you joy. 

I understand that we live in a fast paced world and it so easy to get caught up in the busyness of our lives. We don’t want to miss out on anything—the social media posts, the social gatherings and whatever else your EGO believes is more important.

But you’re important.

Your dreams matter.

You matter.

The EGO’s job is to keep you safe because she is comfortable with the familiar and she will want you to move on as quickly as possible. 

We don’t sit in our grief—in the neutral zone, because we can’t control how long it will take and instead of moving forward, we return to the same type of job, relationship or residence out of fear. And so, the cycle of repeated patterns continues.

Get comfortable in the neutral zone with these 3 tips:1. Express yourself creatively

Spend at least 30 minutes, 3 times a week doing something creative such as writing, drawing, painting, singing, dancing etc. Whatever brings you joy! Schedule it in your smartphone and set a reminder.

By doing something creative, you’re connecting with your soul, where you focus on solutions, access your inner wisdom and intuition. You shift from being in your head, where the EGO focuses on problems and fears. 

In David Richo’s book: How to Be An Adult in Relationships, he writes that when we create, it often soothes us because we connect with our soul—the feminine source of nurturance that exists within each of us.

2. Be receptive exercise

Sit in solitude for a minimum of 30 minutes—no music and tune into your thoughts. Light a candle if you wish and use the timer on your smartphone to sit and really listen to your thoughts.

3. Journal

Record any recurring thoughts, patterns or insights.

A bonus tip:4. Connect with Mother Earth

Go for a walk for a minimum of 20 minutes—no music and tune into your thoughts.

When we slow down and take that time in the neutral zone to regroup, we connect more deeply to our soul’s calling and we allow the unfolding of a life that is more fulfilling and purposeful.

In my experience, when I was in the neutral zone, I learned that I had made everyone and everything a priority. I honestly believed that I was “helping” them, but I realized that I was not! I was avoiding being with myself because I was afraid to make changes in my life, the unknown is scary and so my EGO had found many ways to distract me.

Maybe, you are you used to being there for others.

And you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired!

Making yourself a priority is not selfish, it’s an act of self-love. You’re giving the EGO what she most needs and that is: love.

If you’re feeling tired and frustrated that you are not where you thought you’d be in life. Sign up for my free 7 Days To Joy Challenge here.  

Now, it’s time for you.1.

 This weeks Mana cardHo’oponopono (To set right) 

The message is to restore balance through honest dialogue and forgiveness. This could be with another person(s) or with yourself. If a relationship seems out of balance or the harmony of your life feels disrupted, you may want to recite the Hawaiian forgiveness prayer or other forgiveness ritual.

I did a radio show episode called Forgiveness Sets You Free! I talk about the Hawaiian forgiveness prayer in detail and why it’s important to forgive others. I did a guided meditation to forgive the one person we often overlook, ourselves.

Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself, so that you can move on and experience joy.

Recently I had a sudden realization and that is, I always have a choice. It was if a brick hit me over the head. It was that profound! 

In the past I would try really hard to make things work, whether it was a relationship, my work or an idea and instead of letting go and moving on, I would wait for things to change or for other options to present itself.

This kept me stuck!

What I believed as patience, was being passive.

What I believed as being committed to the relationship, my work or an idea, was me being attached to a specific outcome and I was unable to see other options. 

How to make another choice

It is okay to change your mind, but many of us are afraid to, because we think of how it will affect others and/or it’s too much of an effort to make a change. We might also be afraid to admit that we made a mistake.

You’re human and you’re not meant to go through life doing things perfectly!

You’re meant to grow through life and this means that wherever you are right now, is exactly where you’re meant to be and whatever is not working in your life, is simply feedback, telling you that you are limiting yourself.

Set aside some time to listen for at least 30 minutes. Ensure that you won’t be disturbed. Light a candle if you wishand take several deep breaths to centre yourself and tune into your thoughts. Use the timer on your smartphone if you need to.

Then ask yourself the following questions:

Do I feel like I am chasing someone or something? (Is it only one-sided?)

Does it feel like I am forcing someone or something? (Are your efforts turning up empty?)

Am I addressing the same issue and nothing seems to change? (If it’s recurring more than 3 times, that’s a clear sign, that you are trying to manipulate and control someone or something. This is a hard pill to swallow.)

Am I trying to figure things out? (If you’re asking yourself how do I, should I, I don’t know etc., you’re not only creating more worry and/or fear, but you’re blocking yourself from receiving insight, inspiration or guidance) 

What am I learning?

The answers may not come right away and when they do, write them down in your journal, so you can keep track of recurring thoughts, patterns or insights.

Once you bring to awareness of where you’re resonating. Only then can you change.

When you ask the right questions, youshift you from the victim mentality to empowerment.

We are constantly faced with choices each moment, each hour, each day and so forth, but in order to live a joyful life, it is essential to make choices that are right for and you do this by:

 trusting yourself;

surrendering to what is, instead of having a certain expectation and

staying open to possibilities

When I recently spoke with Crystal Andrus Morissette, in episode 4 of my radio show Heal Past Wounds and Bring Joy Back, she shared that

“Empowerment means knowing that you have a choice and the choice first and foremost is that you’ve got to take care of you.”

I had a lot of fun speaking with Crystal last week. She kept the conversation real and provided a lot of wisdom and inspiration.

She was on fire when she explained that Woman energy is, when you finally have the courage to:

look at yourself,

your choices,

your dreams

And say, I want and deserve to be in alignment with who I am.

Ask yourself:

What would courage have me do? And am I willing to do it?

“When you’re willing to do what courage would have you do, that’s where the good stuff happens!!!”

Crystal shared a lot of amazing insights into being an empowered woman. 

The link to listen to episode 4, The Emotional Edge With Crystal Andrus Morissette,is: www.bringjoyback.com. I would also love it if you subscribed on iTunes and left a review to let me know what you think.

Happy New Year! It feels like a fresh start and a new beginning. We’re filled with so much anticipation and like a race horse we’re ready to go off to the races to achieve our goals we carried over from the previous year, vowing that we must achieve them, as well as any resolutions we made for this year. After all it’s a clean slate.

I believe that’s a lot of pressure to put on ourselves and it sets us up for failure.

What if we just focused on taking one day at a time? All we have is the present moment. Each day when the sun rises and we wake up, it’s actually a new beginning. It’s always an opportunity to begin again.

In the Celtic Tree Calendar, a calendar with thirteen lunar divisions named after trees, we’re in the cycle of the Birch until January 20. It’s a time of rebirth and regeneration. During this cycle, we can sit in contemplation, envision our future and make some plans for the year ahead.

The Goddess to connect with is Aphrodite and her message is: balance your male energy with more female energy through self-care.

7 ways to nurture yourself 

Connect with Mother Earth. Go for a walk for a minimum of 20 minutes—no music and tune into your thoughts.

Be receptive exercise. Sit in solitude for a minimum of 30 minutes—no music and tune into your thoughts. Light a candle if you wish and use the timer on your smartphone to sit and really listen to your thoughts.

Take a nap. Resting your mind-body-spirit in the middle of the day can lift your mood, make you more alert, and ease stress.

Prepare a hearty soup. Not only is soup delicious, it’s comforting on a cold winter evening. It is also easy to make. If you don’t have a favorite recipe, check out 16 Hearty Soups That Will Fill You Up by Kitchn.

Soak in a bubble bath. Use lavender essential oil to relax any aching muscles and to calm your mind. A bath can also help you sleep better.

Read a book. Snuggle up by the fireplace (if you have one) or wrap yourself with a throw cover and lose yourself in a good story or gain some new knowledge on a topic you’ve always wanted to learn. Reading is extremely relaxing and it expands your horizons and vocabulary.

Express yourself creatively. Spend at least 30 minutes, 3 times a week doing something creative e.g. writing, drawing, painting, singing, dancing etc. Whatever brings you joy! Schedule it in your smartphone and set a reminder. By doing something creative, you’re connecting with your soul, where you focus on solutions, access your inner wisdom, intuition, and shift from being in your head, where the EGO focuses on problems, fears.

I personally changed my yoga practice. I went from Power Yoga, which is more active to Yin yoga, which is a passive practice. Yin yoga has helped me be more in my body, breath more consciously while holding the poses for longer periods and rest my racing thoughts. 

Benefits of easing into the new year

It may seem counterintuitive to ease your way into the New Year when everything around us is moving fast. But when we slow down, we connect more deeply to our soul’s calling and we allow the unfolding of a life that is more fulfilling and purposeful.

Our bodies are wise, we just need to honour it by listening. When we slow down, we connect to our body’s natural rhythms and cycles. The more we listen and nurture ourselves, the more we alleviate anxiety and overwhelm because you become grounded in the present moment. You also rejuvenate your mind-body-spirit so that you can take your next action step from an empowered place.

I want to hear from you

Do you make time for self-care and if so, what are ways that you nurture yourself?

Are you resistant to slowing down?

In a perfect world we would have perfect relationships with our mothers. But the reality is, many women have had or continue to have unhealthy relationships with their mothers.

Deep down you know that your mother did the best she could with what she knew, but your inner child felt abandoned. This created separation, instead of togetherness within the family.

Maybe you feel:

ungrateful for wanting things to be different than it actually is

guilty for being estranged from your mother and

angry because no matter how hard you try, you never feel good enough.

It doesn’t have to be this way. Your feelings matter, because you matter!

Sometime last year I watched a movie "Stranded In Paradise" and there was a scene with the main actress and her mother, who was upset that her daughter lost her job and was taking a break to figure things out. She thought her daughter was being irresponsible. Then her mother went on about how she can't rely on anyone, especially a man.

Her daughter finally stood up to her and said. "Yes mom, I know the story on how dad left you when I was a baby and you were the sole provider. I carry a lot of anger and fear and it's not even mine!"

I realized that I inherited a similar story too! For years I lived my mother’s unfulfilled dreams and carried her pain, hurt and disappointment.

I created a FREE meditation called Release Your Mother's Pain Story, to help you heal and move forward.

In this meditation, I guide you to connect with your mother to find out her pain story with your father and learn how it played out in your life on an unconscious level.

It may be affecting: 

your relationships with men (e.g. betrayal, didn’t feel you have a voice);

financial issues (e.g. you feel anxious about not having enough money);

you work really hard; and

you’re afraid to take risks (e.g. choose jobs that are safe)

To find out your mother’s pain story you inherited, click on the FREE meditations link.

There is a common misconception about forgiveness. Many of us believe that it’s a one-time deal! You forgive the person(s) and the issue is resolved. I’ve heard my clients say “Oh, I already forgave that person.”Yes, this is true, you did. But there is more, look at any area of your life where you’re feeling stuck.

Whatever injustice was done to us or however we felt wronged, at the time it was too painful to experience the emotions and so our body stored it, to be healed when it’s ready.

Imagine you’re like a rose, you’re unfolding patiently, petal by petal to reveal the light within you. One petal might be (Anger) towards that person(s). Another petal might be (Shame) from the experience. Then another petal might be (Fear) that it will happen again. Maybe a current situation is triggering the same emotions.

Another misconception about forgiveness is that we are letting the other person off the hook. This is not true! Forgives is a gift we give ourselves.

I personally have forgiven family members countless times, not because it was the right thing to do, but because I needed to let go of the pain story that created repeated patterns in my life.

The purpose of forgiveness

Each time we forgive, we always gain a new perspective. This insight is usually necessary for us, in order to move forward. We also gain more love and compassion beginning with ourselves then towards others.

Forgiveness is not condoning what the other person did or said, forgiveness is freedom from the story—the hurt, pain and disappointment you felt so that you can move forward.

4 tips to help with forgiveness

The Goddess to work with is: Mary Magdalene. Her message is to release unforgiveness toward another so you can heal and move on. 

Set aside some time where you will not be disturbed and close your eyes, take several deep breaths, until you feel relaxed. Connect with her and ask her for guidance and support.

Full moons are a perfect time to shed the past. Write a letter to the person uncut, you’re never going to send it to them. End the letter forgiving them and before you burn it or tear it up, say aloud, I release this, I am no longer [insert emotion e.g. angry] love will heal this.

When we think of someone or have a past memory, our energy is still connected to that person. It’s our inner child who wants things to be different than it actually was. This is impossible! Cut the ties that bind you in my free forgiveness meditation.

 If you have unfinished business with a loved one in spirit and youfeel stuck, unable to grieve your pain, find out how working with me, can help you heal past wounds and bring joy back.

When we forgive, we are no longer living in the past. By releasing the hurt, pain and disappointment, it loses power over us and we experience a burden being lifted. You feel optimistic, joyful and peaceful. You have more energy and you have better relationships with family members and other people.

I want to hear from you

Do you find it hard to forgive another?

Have you forgiven because you felt it was the right thing to do?

Sometimes when I feel like I’m pushing myself to accomplish a task and I’m working really hard to achieve a goal, I intuitively know that I am trying to make something happen my way.

I will admit, I don’t immediately listen. I wait until the message becomes loud and clear, that I need to stop what I’m doing. The message usually comes in the form of fatigue, neck pain, an inability to concentrate or from a rune or Oracle card telling me to surrender, let go of my plans etc.

I’ve noticed that all too often, women sacrifice their needs-wants-desires because they make everyone or everything a priority. We learned from our mother’s and foremothers that it is selfish to want more for our lives. So, we work really hard to try to fit in, but instead of feeling happy, we feel trapped! Some of us are unknowingly living our mothers unfulfilled dreams (which was my story), others are doing the right thing, not what’s right for them.

Working hard, pushing, striving and doing, is a very unnatural way for women. Today is the Celtic Sabbat called Samhain—it signifies the end of the harvest season and the beginning of winter. It’s also known as the Celtic New Year. 

This is a perfect time to light a candle and to honor our mother lineage, by acknowledging all that they’ve endured to light the way for us. 

It is also a period of darkness, where the veils between the worlds are at our thinnest and our ancestors surround us. Take some time for stillness and listen in to their wisdom.

Be receptive exercise 

Step 1. In the evening or when it’s most convenient for you, set aside some alone time for 30 minutes and be in complete silence. No music, radio or television sounds in the background. 

Light a candle if you wish and use the timer on your smartphone to sit and really listen to your thoughts. Be conscious of your breathing and how you feel—uncomfortable, aches, negative, peaceful, happy etc. If you’re fortunate to live near a beach or in the country, then I highly recommend sitting by the ocean, open fields or forest, weather permitting of course.

Step 2. In your journal record whatever you discover. Did you receive an answer to a problem? Did you receive inspiration on action steps to take towards your goals? Did you receive insights or clarity about something that baffled you? Write that down.

When women make time to listen regularly, they open themselves to be in a flow, where life becomes effortless, almost magical.

Last week I worked intensively with a Business Mindset Coach and by Friday, I had a huge breakthrough! I was able to see ever so clearly how I created my reality, by some tough questions she asked—ones that I didn’t want to answer. But my desire for change, outweighed my fears.

After sitting with the discomfort, I acknowledged “my story”, in other words, what I had been telling myself repeatedly. I then wrote it out and set the paper up in flames, before I went on to write a brand new story. The purpose was to create a new belief and to reprogram my mind.

Incredibly, it was effective because I started to feel like I had already achieved what I intended. Except the feeling wasn’t enough, my Business Mindset Coach advised, I needed to trick my EGO into believing my new reality, by acting as if I am already living my new reality.

Not only did I begin to show up differently, I also took inspired action, otherwise it would have been wishful thinking and to my amazement, doors opened to opportunities that once seemed impossible.

Nothing is impossible

The more you tell yourself something, the more you affirm a belief. It’s our EGO that limit us to what we can and cannot do. But we are actually limitless and you can challenge your EGO’s limitation.

Have you ever noticed that your EGO only focuses on the problem?

You might have noticed your EGO doesn’t have a solution.

How would your EGO know that things won’t work out, if you’ve never even tried? (The key word here is you, because your EGO will find evidence from someone else’s experience.)

Your EGO’s purpose is to remain with the status quo, because it’s familiar. But deep down you know that you deserve to have a life filled with joy!

It takes just as much energy to tell yourself something positive, then it does to tell yourself something negative. 

If you came to me about bringing more joy into your life and I told you to tell yourself: I can’t have fun in my life, that’s child’s play, I have all these bills to pay. I just don’t know how I can possibly make time for that. I can’t, it’s impossible with my schedule… 

Would you listen?

NO!

I am certain that the negativity would bring your energy down.

If I said, joy is your birthright, you deserve to enjoy your life, you can make time for joy because you are important. When you have fun in your life, it makes life effortless. What are your options? How can you make joy a priority?

You would feel energized, lighter and motivated.

Start telling yourself a new story with these 5 tips:

Acknowledge your current belief. If you are telling yourself I can’t….I don’t know how….I should….I have to….I don’t have….How do I…..Everyone else can.… etc., release it by writing it out on paper, then tear it up so it loses power over you. Create a new belief. Affirm repeatedly: All the answers are within me. It’s best to say it aloud a few times, until you feel it.Ask the right questions. This will shift you from the victim mentality to empowerment. 
What are my next right steps?
What am I not seeing?Journal. The answers may not come right away and when they do, write them down so you keep track of recurring thoughts, patterns or insights.Connect with a loved one in spirit. Set aside a time and place where you won’t be disturbed. Then close your eyes, take several deep breaths, until you feel relaxed.

Internally say your loved one’s name and when you sense their presence, talk to them about your situation and ask him or her questions, then listen and feel for the response.

When you acknowledge your current belief, create a new belief, ask the right questions, journal and connect with a loved one in spirit, you are taking responsibility for how you show up in your life.

In any given moment you have the ability to change your story, from one that limits you to what you think you can achieve, to one where you fulfill your heart’s desires.

I want to hear from you

Do you find yourself trying to figure out the details of something you want to change in your life, but you end up feeling frustrated and stuck?

Have you noticed that the more you analyze or process something, you feel anxious?

How can you see your current story from a higher perspective?

 

The day before the lunar eclipse full moon, I woke up feeling brand new. An inner peace followed me throughout the day, you could drop a pin in my head.

However, I didn’t automatically wake up this way! For weeks leading up to the main event, I was consciously releasing repeated patterns and limiting beliefs that stemmed from my EGO. 

She is actually a wounded part of me and when I realized that she is my inner child, it helped me to connect with her and build a relationship with her, instead of keeping my EGO separate.

Admittedly, I was resistant to facing my pain story yet again, but my inner child was clinging on to the past and it was preventing me from moving forward.

I knew that she needed more love as I underwent transformation and with the help of my spirit team, who gently and lovingly guided me to be gentle, I was led to the best methods that assisted me, in finally releasing the past.

Not only did I receive gifts from my inner child and an important message, I feel whole, complete and balanced.

Sometimes your EGO is in charge of your life

When we’re resonating in our EGO’s, we’re acting like Parents—rescuing, caretaking and overcompensating to the point that we become emotionally depleted. Then we swing over and act like a Child—demanding, blaming, complaining and creating drama.

We’re passive, but deep down we know that we deserve more. So, we become frustrated and angry because we don’t know how to express ourselves authentically and we remain stuck in our aggression.

But in order to resonate in your feminine power and act like an Adult, you need to assert yourself. When you’re assertive, you’re willing, you’re courageous, you let go and take action!

The Parent and Child Archetype is what you developed as a protection mechanism because you learned that it wasn’t safe to shine your brilliant light.

If you recognized yourself in either the Parent and Child Archetype and you want to find out which one is your dominant Archetype, I’ve created an online class called: How To Talk Back To Your EGO.

By learning which Archetype is sometimes in charge, you’ll understand yourself, know yourself, love yourself and be kind to yourself.

Whether your dominant Archetype is the Parent, acting like a martyr or you dominant Archetype is the Child, acting like a victim, they both prefer to remain with the status quo, because it’s familiar. 

To learn how to give the Parent and Child Archetype what they most need and that is love and to connect to your feminine power and meet your Adult Archetype, you can check it out here.

The goal is not to get rid of the EGO, but to shift you into your feminine power to be more in charge of your life.

When you acknowledge all parts of you, even the parts that we wish were different because let’s get real here, no one likes to get angry, jealous, sad or feel afraid. We all want to feel good, positive and happy.

However, we have a range of emotions and if we ignore the “negative” ones, it creates an imbalance. Eventually, it shows up in our health-wealth-relationships.

Unconditional love is the path to (JOY) and if you want to experience joy in your life, it begins with you.

I want to hear from you

What are your thoughts about your EGO?

Did learning about the Parent and Child Archetype help you see your EGO differently?

Are you able to see how your EGO can sometimes be in charge of your life?

 

If I could describe how my year has been going in one word, it would be: whirlwind and now that we are in the midst of eclipse season, I am bracing myself for big changes.

My EGO has been keeping me busy with fears and beliefs that are limiting and I know when she takes over, I feel tired, drained and an inability to move forward. The more that I step into the unknown, the more my EGO will get in my way.

She has me oscillating between wanting things to be different from the past or worrying about things that have yet to happen in the future. Needless to say, it’s been distracting, but my Spirit Team’s gentle and loving, but firm guidance is focussed intention. 

In other words, stay present!

This requires me to love myself, even the parts that I wish were different because in order to resonate in (Joy) I must, love myself unconditionally. 

I’ve learned that my EGO doesn’t trust that everything will work out and she tries to be in control, because she doesn’t feel safe. So, I nurture her like I would a little girl, because we don’t love and nurture a child only once! 

If I ignore her, she will sabotage my efforts for change and lately because I will be birthing an entire new life, I make it a priority to choose joy.

Don’t wait to experience joy

All too often we focus on the destination and forget to enjoy the journey. This may sound like a cliché, but if you are not enjoying your life right now, then most likely you will not experience joy when you attain the goal or arrive at your destination.

When you look to a person, place or thing to experience joy, it is guaranteed that it will elude you. Joy is an inside job! Your EGO believes that joy is outside of yourself and in the future. This is not true, all we have is the present moment.

You can choose joy right now, even if you’re not where you want to be. Here are 3 tips:

Walk yourself up to empowerment. We have a range of emotions. It’s not realistic to feel positive all of the time, otherwise it will create an imbalance. When you feel fear, anxious, guilt or anger—this is actually your EGO who needs love. Honor what you are feeling by writing it out. Then tear it up so it loses power over you.Create a new belief. Positive affirmations are meant to reprogram the mind, but they are ineffective if you are wrapped up in fears. As you honor your feelings, affirm repeatedly: I choose joy. It’s best to say it aloud.Express yourself! Spend at least 30 minutes, 3 times a week doing something creative e.g. writing, drawing, painting, singing, dancing etc. Whatever brings you joy! Schedule it in your smartphone and set a reminder.

By doing something creative, you’re connecting with your soul, your spirit, where you focus on solutions, access your inner wisdom, intuition, and shifting you from being in your head, where the EGO focuses on problems, fears. I learned from the author, Wayne Dyer that EGO is: Edging God Out. (If you’re not comfortable with the word God, replace it with Spirit).

When you walk yourself up to empowerment, create a new belief and express yourself, you’re enjoying your life right now, in the present moment, where your point of power is.

It may seem counterintuitive to have fun, but when we worry, we create more stress in our lives and when we enjoy, life becomes effortless—almost magical.

If there is one thing that I can impart from the spirit world and that is, to enjoy life and savour the moment. 

Struggle and suffering are the path of resistance. 

Joy is your birthright! 

Will you reclaim it?

I want to hear from you

What would happen if you let go of control and found joy today?

Do you find it difficult to stay in a place of love, when things are not going according to your plans?

Does it feel like something is missing in your life?