Jennifer F. Netto's Blog

 

From being 43 kilos in my upper secondary years to hitting an all high 101 in August 2020.. yup that’s a size S to a Plus 22, I kept fooling myself thinking I had everything under control when I knew I didn’t.. as much as I was gradually loosing a grip on my weight issues and denying the problems in my habits, maybe also a problem due to my high level of confidence regardless of my measurements since I never felt odd being whatever size I was (do read my older post on Living a Plus Size Life), my physiological self decided to teach me a lesson. 

Turning pre-diabetic when I weighed point one of a ton (as my husband would say it) was a wake up call. The voice that kept crying to myself on how never to fall into this category of being diabetic, given my family history and being Indian basically, somehow drowned along the years because of all the excuses I use to make while juggling everything in life which always kept fitness lost somewhere in my dreams. 

I was a very active person in school, stayed active for most of my early twenties but somehow lost my passion and discipline for it hence the outcome. One day I just felt odd and decided to do a self-test at home and when I saw my reading, I flipped. My GP challenged me, the meds freaked me out, and so it began.. my determination to change my lifestyle because I don’t want to die young and not be part of my grandchildren’s story (I know right, I sound like a woman born in the 1930s but seriously, the fact that I lost my parents when I needed them the most was why I don't understand how I lost my grip on this myself). 

I didn’t do much actually to arrive here... 30 kilos and the drop of many inches later, it all went down to habits. Habits played a huge role. Cutting out unnecessary calories was the main contributor to my weight loss. First it was eliminating sugar and rice, and stuff you would find in a bakery (yes all of it!) which brought me down by 10 kilos, and then in Oct 2021 I eliminated pastas, noodles, breads, jams, and my most favourite food in the world - peanut butter! 

What do I eat everyday?
Protein, vegetables, fruits. Yes I snack on some chips once a while especially when I crave for salt. 

Do I feel deprived?
Nope. Scientifically it is proven that if you do anything diligently for 21 days, it sticks on. Yeah I knew this while gaining all that weight too, but the thing that lacked was discipline, and the horrors of procrastination. As they say, procrastination is the mother of all fuck ups, hence my fuck up!

I incorporated road cycling on weekends (targeting a completion of 10km each ride), skipping (300 times) on alternate days of the week, and since October 2021, I got myself on a fitness app called FitOn and I schedule my exercise routines for when I am in the mood, which is almost every other day once I get back from work. I make a point to get off my office chair, stop staring at the PC, just to walk around. Leave my office on time, so that I get to be home on time for my health, and once all that is done, I do spend time again before I sleep or when wake up again at 4am to start my day, to  complete whatever unfinished work there is, cook for family and head off to work, and if there isn't any pending things to do, exercise comes before sunrise. I believe in being flexible so that I don't feel tormented. All these habits have not just helped me lose weight and feel fit, it has helped me tremendously with my lumbar stenosis/sciatica which I was diagnosed with in December 2020.  

It sure feels great to be able to be extra fashionable as I was in my early years once again, not that I wasn’t when I was a plus plus size woman (remember my confidence level, it never stopped me from looking good and don't get me wrong, if you've been following my blog for the last 14 years, you would know I never linked size or skin colour to beauty, you don't need to be skinny to be beautiful) but clothes are cheaper when they aren’t plus size (at least in Malaysia is the case), cost of living is cheaper when you’re not downing just about any crap under the sun, and yes the medical bills (God willing) goes easy on you and the potential gastric it gives. 

So to those who asked me how I did it, and to the person who asked me if I had gone to Turkey last December using my son's tennis trip as a pretense for a weight loss surgery (thanks for making me confirm how strange a person you are), well this is the answer - LIFESTYLE! 

1.5 years since I took serious control of my lifestyle and I am diabetic free, size M, and quite determined to stay that way! Splurge yourself once a while if you want but hey don't kid yourself over that phrase "Cheat Days!" Look out on my next post about that!

To all those who have been messaging me in my social media inbox, applauding me and sharing how inspired you are by what I have succeeded, thank you, thank you, and thank you! 

Disclaimer: Everyone has a unique body and biological adaptations, find the right fit for your weight loss journey. The above is not an advise for everyone, but a testimony of my weight loss journey. This is not an add for FitOn but my personal sharing. 

 

When I was invited to join the Asian Literary Society and Journal of Asian Art, Culture, and Literature (JAACL) Presentation featuring Malaysian Literature, I wasn't sure if it was truly the platform for me for reasons only I know since I have not really been active in my "Literary Works". We all know, communicative and business writing or research-based science writing is far from the perfect literary world, but I was honoured to be on board as guest panellist in this forum, and to speak about Malaysian Literature - my take on it, and what channels my passion for writing as a published author myself. 
It was a pleasure making new acquaintances with two other renowned Malaysian writers, Professor Datin Dr. Ruzy Suliza Hashim, and Ms. Anuradha Chelliah. Dr Paul was not able to join us due to technical issue but, I've known Paul for some many good years already since we became friends through Aspires - a Facebook group that championed for Mathematics and Science to be taught in English in our National Schools.

Questions on the Forum:

Q1) What aspect of life in Malaysia does it touch upon in your short stories?

  

Life as a woman is usually the central theme to my writing. Our hurdles, our glories. I look for connection that make meaning to the existence of a person. Interpersonal and intercultural connections. I believe no one can say their life is their own making, we owe someone or some event to shaping who we become.  And with Malaysia being a multicultural country, there are many stories that can be written about hardships, successes, humour and horror and that too from various perspectives. So if there’s a good story to pen, one that carries a good lesson through humour, or horror be it… I’ll pen it.

 

Q2) Coming from a multiracial country, do you think writers carry the voice of their own race better or is there a biasness to it in regards to post-colonial or political literature?

  

Naturally most writer would feel safe in their own known zone - hence they write within familiar territories. There’s nothing wrong in writing what you are familiar with or can personally resonate to. However, there are good writers who daringly aspire to be the voice of someone who isn’t defined to their own race, or gender or religion. I think it takes a lot of courage to be such a writer - to have an exclusive level of respect for others and to bring out their story without championing their own race or religion. They can be called the colour blind writers, they write it as is.. fearlessly and with no filters.. only hopes of creating a more inclusive world.  I believe knowing who the writer is gives us a chance to understand the intrinsic meaning of their writing. There’s always a part of themselves embed in their work no matter which voice they carry. 

 

Q3) Could you give us an idea about the literature of Malaysia?

  

Well, literature  in Malaysia is complex. It is a contribution of literary works from many different societies through space and time. We have the independent literature that’s native to each race and then there are those that are influenced by the presence of travellers, traders, and migrants from around the world given the geographical position of our country and the world’s access to us since the very early years of civilisation in fact which we can see resonated even today in our arts and literature. Right now, like many other countries, our literature is evolving and plays a critical role in combating current pressing issue faced in today’s age of globalisation. 

This Society has opened a new channel in the network of writers for me. It is amazing to see how many people in Asia is connected through the power of words - poetry, short stories, novels etc,  and how they bring out the essence of their identity as individuals whose lives are interweaved with the identity of their country and their fellow countrymen. I wish to congratulate its Founder Mr Manoj Krishnan, and Dr. Bishakha Sarma, ALS Administrator who approached me and painstakingly contacted each of us on this forum to have it ready for its live premier, for a job well done and for putting so much effort to create this esteemed network of writers in Asia. Asia is truly rich is culture and it would take more than a lifetime to know everything about its immense beauty through its history, arts, music, food, and most of all people, but the admiration I have for how diverse we are as a continent goes beyond words. 

As yesterday was the first day into my Doctorate journey and my first time as a guest panellist on an International Forum, I am truly humbled and ever so grateful for the opportunities that are coming my way. I am convinced repeatedly that I am nothing without the people around me - my family and my friends, my county and my God. And that I have a lot more to contribute in making the changes I want to see in the lives of those who needs our voices as writers, as neighbours and as friends. We are more connected than we are made to believe, and this experience has made me put a check on the things I have been putting aside for way too long, my true passion to write and publish. I may not be able to make the world a greater place, but I know I can make at least one person's world a more hopeful place through my writing, and that is what I will aim for, one reader at a tine. And as the saying goes - Love Makes the World Go Round, let's continue to create the literature that proves it does and bring the world closer. 

            

Looking back at the blog posts I have written way back when blogging began for me, it made me recall the things I had been through that got me writing those posts. It was my outlet to vent, to share, to celebrate, to cry... I wish I could go back to that woman and give her a hug for all that she had been through and to tell her you were right to believe you can make it. 

I have grown a lot since then. Grown to accepting the hardships I faced as a lesson to my personal growth. Who I was 12 years ago or even who I was even 2 years ago, which was the last time I wrote on this blog, are so very different to who I am right now. I am definitely proud of who I've become, someone who swims even in hot water. Yes that's the latest tagline I have given myself - I will swim even if you dunk me in hot water because I have survived and I will continue to do so.

Lesser talk these days, lesser reactions to bullshit, lesser waste of energy - that keeps me going. I know how I was always irritated and pissed at the stupid acts others had, but you know what, stupidity will live on just as the cockroaches do and you just need to know how to avoid having them get in your way. I surprise myself a lot too these days by my ability to stay silent when people around me rant impractical ideas. I feel that if they want to feel like they are being heard, then let's just give it to them - eventually someone will tell them its a bad decision, or they'll learn it the hard way. What made me change? Most people don't appreciate an honest constructive comment, they want to feel like they know best, so why be the one to take that away from them? Yeah, I know.. that's mean, but if you're not the one to say it to them, someone else will, so don't waste you time raising your own blood pressure. 

 

I was busy googling for unique facebook bios and found this site that had about hundred plus of it. Went through each and I found this and it is so apt to what I always say against "The Sky Is The Limit" phrase. I don't know who came up with this saying.. but I love it!
Decided to design it in a Facebook Cover and this is it.

Yes, it's 8th of March once again and it's our day! But before I wish you a Happy International Women's Day, I'd like to ask you to ask yourself.. how many times have you wished for a woman to have a stone thrown at her for how much she has pissed you off? Or how many times have you accused a lady of something you have no clue about? Or join in a gossip not to help but only because it gives you the high to know how badly one is behaving or how rotten their life is turning out to be?

How much do you actually do to make the wrongs in another woman's life, right?

I may sound like Ebenezer Scrooge right now as he nagged over Christmas, but before we go wishing everyone with ovaries, can we ask ourselves this?

Just to set the record straight, I'm not a saint with my opinions on other women myself. I do let my annoyance and anger get the better of me, sometimes to the greatest extent of calling one bitch! Because that's the thing right, we think we can just call people whatever we want because we are raged over something they've done to us. Maybe yes sometimes some ladies deserve no respect from us - they've hurt us, spread rumours about us, stab us in the back, rob us of our happiness, etc etc etc. But strangely you know what, our bad reactions can sometimes be worse than what they've done to us.

Where do we draw the line?

If you believe in the energy of goodness, you'd say Karma will teach them one day. But the hurt remains and it takes a very courageous woman to put that pain aside and move on with her head held high.

I've been through a lot this week (not to mention the last 41 years as well) but I know the fact that my pain is nothing compared to the pain many others go through and are still standing strong. To those who are hurting me and stabbing me behind my back, all I can say is have a good time doing it. I hope you eventually find the courage to do it at my face so I can give you a round of applause for being the person you are! As for me, I have more important things to do with my life! And this to me is a growth, from being the person who used to rage over the ill manners some women can have to be one who wishes them well regardless of the crap they do. This is why I want to celebrate women's day! That to me sounds appropriate to the theme UN has adopted for IWD 2018 - Press For Progress. It's my personal progress - to be strong and not cave in the crap.

I have a mission to accomplish as a mother and a person of my own. I have an obligation towards the people who are associated with me - my friends, my colleagues and my loved ones, even to my country, and if I can't make them happy, at least I don't want to be the person that makes them miserable.

P.S. But don't get this wrong, if you've hurt me too many times, I'll still forgive you but please don't expect any more associations between us. I don't like to be reminded of the crap put on me.

So HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN'S DAY to you!
#pressforprogress

I had a rather unexpected yet interesting weekend after discovering a post on FB on what was supposedly or should I say apparently a FAT SHAMING advertisement by Hewlett Packard on their Spectra - the world's thinnest laptop.

This was brought to attention by fat-positive feminist, sexologist and author Virgie Tovar of USA who says HP's new ad is unacceptable, absurd, and body shaming and that it's tagline "Power To The Thinnest" is an insult to the fat community - yes you read that right, a laptop's tagline is an insult to the fat community.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fb...
In my amazement of this new world I discovered - a world where people are offended by adjectives used to describe an innovation that has no life within it, a machine with electronics and processors, used to connect with other people and do complete work and create more creations, is being condemned for being hailed thin and light. Really? I did have a hilarious time trying to understand this last Friday. I mean it's a laptop for crying out loud!

Should I feel offended that the laptop is thin? Or that people like a thin laptop? Or am I offending other plus size people if I go buy a thin laptop? Would that mean I am supporting HP in shaming people who are big like me? Hmmm... wait let me see...  I have a Mac Book Air, if apple had any lighter and thinner MacBooks which I could afford, I'd go get that because my God it's a LAPTOP!!!!!! It's not like I'm out shopping for a groom or bride! And if you're walking down the street and you see this ad, how on earth can people think - "HEY! WTF! HP! YOU'RE FAT SHAMING ME!" How else are they going to word their world's thinnest laptop?

https://www.yahoo.com/beauty/does-pow...
What's with the obsession over words that mean the opposite of large? Can't people use them to state a measurement fact? Must the plus size community be so sensitive that it pisses people off thinking we are being ridiculous, expecting the world to change its vocabulary just to accommodate us? It's not a bra they are promoting you know, it's a laptop!

If HP had advertised its ultra thin laptop in the hands of an ultra thin model and said 'power to the thinnest', ok then go get pissed if you want, yes, fat people buy laptops too. But HP did not do that!
Even with the above image, a slim model wanting to have the laptop - can you imagine if they had put a larger guy in the picture and the laptop being the thinnest in the world, that would have been another cry of insult, definitely claiming it as fat shaming too. Why must a fat guy be subjected to this? You know what, if we live our lives being pissed at everything, we'd be best locked up in a room with nothing around us.

So if you go get all upset about how an advertisement has worded their products, ask yourself, is that product a living thing? Should I get offended that people want things small and slim while I'm not either one of those? Is it fair to myself and those who might be depending on me to feel positive about themselves to go all berserk over an advertisement that has nothing to do with plus size humans?

Do I have to give all these words power over me? The power to destroy my self-esteem? If it were that easily destroyed, then I would think, I don't have any to begin with.

If you are big, as I am, and have no reason to believe you need to lose weight (I don't think that way by the way - I'd like to lose the weight I gained due to child birth and an inactive thyroid but I'm no less confident and I am happy with the woman I am today!) and is happy with the figure you are in; you celebrate life just the way you are, then don't go around expecting changes in things that don't fall in the category of true shaming towards you as what is put out by Virgie, or her followers.

I believe it is important to chose your fights. Don't scream discrimination over everything and anything without seeing it from a different, non absurd perspective. Keeping such an approach can only drive out all the seriousness placed on your cause (body positive) even when it truly means making people stop fat-shaming.

Empower the younger generation and the old by showing they are above adjectives! We don't need to customise the world to make it perfect for us, we only need to make sure HUMANS treat other HUMANS of any size with respect - this includes the plus sized not insulting the thin!

I guess I can say that I lost the liberty to watching a movie on its release date the day I delivered my first child. No, I am not complaining! I'm merely stating a fact. As much as it was fun doing the things you can do before you're entrusted with a little baby in your life, watching a movie after a year or two or a decade later is still a good thing than not watching one at all. Anyway, since it is the Raya holidays this week, I managed to catch up on my movie viewing and watched Kung Fu Panda 3, Boyhood and Movies & Pictures.

KFP3 had many mixed reviews online, but the thing about me, is no matter what others say about a movie, I need to be the judge of it. Anyway I loved it! As I did for KFP1 and 2. It was funny and inspiring as always. The connection between all three movies I believe flowed well.

Credit: Dreamworks

Then there was Boyhood, that was a 172 minutes well spent, but it would have been torture for anyone who hated constant silence as was the case for this. I guess the part that made meaning to me was when the mum screamed her anxieties at her son just before he left her apartment for college.
End of the day, you wonder what life is suppose to be about when you've completed your duties in raising your children and they head on with their own lives. Are we suppose to think, ours is over? I highly doubt so. Motherhood should be about discovering and creating yourself and when your kids have their own wings to fly, shouldn't we take flight to?

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/5346617...
https://fatimaramosdelcano.com/2015/0...
And finally, Words & Pictures, the movie I have been waiting for, for so long! Finally watched it and the wait was worthwhile. Clive Owen and Juliette Binoche played their roles so nicely and watching him whisper words of intellectuality after their evening together, clearly defines the meaning of saposexualism - being attracted to someone's intelligence. In the end, I believe, art and words are essential and if possible, one should not be without the other. 

It's a wonderful opportunity to revisit Alex Haley's book - ROOTS in the reimagined series by History Channel that was aired first on Memorial Day in the US.
Growing up, I remember the weekly anticipation my family experienced in watching Kunta Kinte in action. We never called the show by its actual name - Roots (1977), we named it Kunta Kinte.
It was a highly memorable period for many families who owned a TV set back then. Emotionally intensed and heart breaking at every point in every episode - learning how slaves were traded and treated like animals instead of humans. How a family struggled from one generation to another. How no African slave had the right to their own life, and how within 24 hours, one's fate could change tremendously for the worse. 
Now after 30 years, watching Roots (2016) on TV with my little children, the emotions are even more intensed for me. With age of course you begin to understand the intensity of history. Of how things happened to shape the world we live in today. 
In Roots (2016), phrases such as - your name is your shield- family matters most- honour your ancestors - live in dignity and honour- behold the only thing that's greater than you (the universe!);all these speak loudly to its viewers through this series.
Evaluate our present lives and we'll see how little people care for such substance and how unwilling people are to fight for our loved ones, our name, our roots. 
Night 3's episode where Kizzy says goodbye to Marcellus, choosing her son and daughter-in-law over love shows how much a women sacrifices for the safety of her children and would do so even if it kills her. That was an honorable and heart-breaking scene to watch especially for a woman who was raised so gracefully by Kunta and Belle and had her life turned upside down because she was caught being able to read and write. 

My 9 year old son, upon seeing Kizzy dragged away, sold off to a new master because they found a letter of freedom she had forged for her boyfriend Noah, asked me what's wrong in knowing how to read and write? Knowledge is power and if you have it you are a threat back then. Even now not much of that idea changed. How governments control what we can and cannot learn. Segregation of elite and non elite groups. It's pretty much still in existence. Whenever I read about how women were persecuted for being able to read, I always tell my children, you have the opportunity to be educated so don't take it for granted! Remember the many who yearn for it and get persecuted instead. Educate yourself and use it to make the world a better place for your children! 
Hence it sickens me when I hear people question why their children need to study certain subjects in school. There are even teachers who make statements like this on subjects such as ICT & RBT, calling it a waste of time. Really? When people in some parts of the world get shot for wanting to learn, here we have a different, more privileged way of taking education for granted.
I'm not an African American, but this history touches me very deeply. History has a lot to teach us when we evaluate the story told wisely. Of course it has to be history with a true account and not one manipulated by politics. 
Here's something I cannot help but compliment after reading it on FB. The caption to this post is very true. Those who forget their past are condemned to repeat it. We are suppose to make something better of our lives than the ones our ancestors had. They fought to break the chains bound to their hands and legs; to break free from the masters who owned them and abused them. Remember their trials and let not your generation now and the ones to come be bound to the unseen masters that insidiously destroys one's existence, one's root! 
Live and don't waste your life!
#roots

With everything that goes on these days, the words common sense being uncommon keeps sounding again and again in the media and in casual chats among friends and family, so often that we don’t give a damn anymore about it.

While being able to say what is and isn’t sensible, not many are willing to reprimand a wrong doer. Why? Is it because they don’t have the guts? Do they feels it is not their business or think someone else will deal with the correctional actions? Does it only become a hot topic of discussion on a social media site because most people are all about talk and not action? We just allow people to do what they want and give a blind eye to it - it’s more convenient that way because you want to avoid being physically injured by the other party for telling on them.

Imagine if we still practiced citizen's arrest?

How many people would be summoned for all the wrong things they do?

For littering (including throwing trash out of their vehicles) and illegal waste dumping, for vandalising public property, for peeing in open areas, for double parking, for smoking in non-smoking areas, for being drunk and disrupting public peace, road bullying and so many more.
If only we had the right to apprehend them.

Everyday, without fail, you will see people taking things for granted and being so irresponsible towards nature and breaking the law on so many micro matters that if continues long enough would show insidious results.

It’s as if education was wasted on them and since education is not making citizens ethical, what else would?

Being a teacher in the Internet era is a completely different ball game with  information being accessible to students at the tip of their fingers. 
Being an educator in the 21st century, we need to keep ourselves updated and convey knowledge that is credible in order to gain our pupils' respect and this is not confined only to science and technology subjects but everything in the curricular including art. We need to be able to incorporate different teaching and learning methods to continuously capture the attention and interest of our students. 
Are we technology savvy enough to be functioning as educators of the 21st century? 
We live in the time where learning and learners are no longer the same as yesteryears. We've evolved so much that even projects and presentations are no longer made on art blocks, manila cardboards or PowerPoint but made as video presentations and podcasts.
We need to watch what we say when we teach - say something ridiculous and parents who are no longer Grade 6 school leavers will come after you. I know I do with my children's teachers - no not because I want to act smart but when I know for a fact something is taught wrongly it needs to be corrected for the benefit of all learners of that teacher's - present and future. 


What's horrifying is how many teachers fail to improve themselves and when they are questioned, queried or even spoken of on social media (which is the in-thing these days) they get offended! 




We should move up with time. We no longer live in the era where teachers are synonymous to almighty. We need to know what we are talking about in order to survive this fast paced world. Lag and we'll fall flat on our face and we'd only have ourselves to blame for the joke we've made of ourselves. 
We can't keep blaming the system when a lot truly lies within the hands of the educator itself.