Kit Olsen's Blog: First Aid Kit

A bit more about me, so that maybe (just maybe) you readers can understand where I am coming from!

I’m an aspiring rookie/indie/sapling author who needs to pound the Vyvanse in order to even sit still and open up Word. I have hundreds of these kooky ideas and thoughts that are all over the place. I need to chill out and start working and, yet, I CANNOT.

I LOVE TO PROCRASTINATE. It  is my favorite pastime  and I don’t see that changing anytime in the near future. I am also difficult to please since I’m an oddball. I read a lot (to avoid finishing my own books) and I’ve noticed something. I don’t relate to a lot of books. The only ones that I really, really, really enjoyed and can vaguely relate to are from Bret Easton Ellis, Mindy Kaling or Tucker Max. Oh, and any and all books that are packed to the brim with facts about deceased rock stars/groupies or psychostimulants. So am I some odd junkie reincarnation of Bob (Roberta?) Dylan who is part sociopath and part Indian-American TV gynecologist with a sprinkling of douchebag? I am so confused.

Anyway, so I’m trying to write a book. Or, I’m trying to write 4 books at once. But whatever. So, my main book revolves around a bunch of 20-somethings in New York, natch. They never go above 14th Street, and they NEVER venture into Brooklyn, so it’s totes different from ‘Girls’. But it chronicles the real antics of people my age in my city in my shoes and my bars. It’s not some creepy erotic romance and it’s not some satirical retelling of Williamsburg hipsters that reads like a script from an episode of Portlandia. (Though I’m working on something like that too.) 

SO ANYWAY, I’m wondering if this is even worth wasting my time on. I don’t want to spend hours hunched over a glowing screen and churning out a brilliant piece of social commentary if no one’s going to fucking read it. Would any of you guys even be INTERESTED in shit like this?

I feel like anything that I have to say would be pretty novel, since most of the NA novels that I have read have been crap. They’re not relatable and they are written by 40-year old women living in the South. Um, I am not a busty blonde with a heaving bosom who traipses around in floral sundresses while attracting the attentions of all the eligible young bachelors in my small town. No. Okay, maybe the floral sundress part.

I think I may need an Ativan because my derpy thoughts are reaching critical mass. Halp?

The historically taboo subgenre of erotic romance has seen a reemergence as of late. As many of these works feature characters in their early to mid-twenties, the entire genre, as a whole, has been portrayed and marketed as NEW ADULT. What publishers and popular erotica authors have failed to realize, however, is that new adult literature does not necessarily have to be teeming with endless romps in the bedroom. In fact, explicit descriptions of sexual nature may not have to be present at all. Cue gasps.

My take on the influx and popularity of 50 Shades/Abbi Glines/Reckless, as well as other smutty works, is that it is an awesome turn for the erotica genre. But just because the characters are 19 years old, the categorization of New Adult should not automatically be bestowed upon them. They are simply erotic romances involving young characters, many of whom seem to have sex on their minds an alarming majority of the time. Perhaps they need to schedule appointments with their therapists…

But I digress. The ages of the characters in these novels aren’t reflected very well, and the issues that they are going through are rarely related to the struggles of new adulthood. I don’t see how the mere presence of twentysomethings allows these books to be branded as new adult — most of the characters don’t even speak, think or behave like normal 19-year olds!

I DO think that an element of romance is important in NA novels, but there are so, so, so many more factors involved in plot and character development for books in this genre. YES, we think about sex but NO, we are not nymphomaniacs who apparently have endless amounts of free time and funds that allow us to nonchalantly engage in whatever wanton escapades we so choose to. We have friends to tend to, jobs to slave away at, bills to hide in kitchen drawers, beer bellies to worry about, parents to forget to call back… the list of worries is endless! Pining over the richest, hottest and smartest guy on the island of Manhattan, with whom I just locked eyes and apparently madly fell in love, for hours on end — that’s probably not going to be very high on my list of priorities.

It’s as if every single NA author is being pressured to write an erotica-heavy book, while most YA authors are being pushed toward dystopian/supernatural themes. Don’t fall into that trap if that’s not what you were going for! Write what you want and know, people!

I do not feel pressured to write erotica because my life is not an erotic romance. I do understand that some readers enjoy these elements in the stories that they read, but all-encompassing romance is not a part of the sad little story that is my life.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that, at least for the new adults that I know, we don’t care to read about all of these undeniable sparks, lingering first glances and shiver-inducing touches because, well, it’s a bit like scrolling through Facebook to torture ourselves as we watch what our peers are doing with their lives. Great romances that resemble “The Notebook” aren’t really present in our lives, so we just feel like shit after reading about them. Why can’t WE have that?! But by reading about characters who are struggling to stretch out their paychecks to cover rent, alcohol, prescriptions and endless takeout, all the while thinking of clever ways to get their significant others to even pay attention to them, we feel a connection and sense of relief.

My current work-in-progress (excruciatingly slow progress, at that….) doesn’t have a single explicit sex scene. You know why? Real live 20-somethings don’t talk about such things, at least not in morbid detail with vivid imagery and lengthy descriptions that are crammed with every sensual adjective invented EVER. If we have a bedroom story to share with friends, we will blabber out a few incoherent words and leave it at that. Most mentions of sex are in regards to embarrassing inquiries that require a level of Omigod-you-can’t-tell-anyone secrecy. I would rather DIE before letting any compilation of words that even resembles a written erotic scene escape my lips in front of my friends. DIE.

My book is going to be written in the tone in which I speak on a daily basis, and hopefully it’ll be relatable to my readers. There are a million thoughts that run through my jumbled head every day, and sex is usually the last thing on my mind. Plus, no one needs to read about quivering members because, honestly, when was the last time you heard a 24-year old use the words “quivering” or “member”?

I’m tired of hearing about how an erotic theme is the hallmark of New Adult fiction. It’s unrealistic, not to mention that it is a sweeping generalization that is, in fact, wrong. We are not a sexy bunch of people. We’re awkward, drunk and addicted to perfecting our online dating profiles.

Why are so many erotic romance characters so young, anyway? Most of our “erotic” encounters are 1) embarrassing as hell, 2) committed in a cloud of drugs or whiskey, or 3) nothing to write home about. Why don’t these talented authors write about women in their 30’s — they actually know what they want and what they’re doing, all without the frantic air of confusion and/or desperation that seemingly follows me and my peers everywhere we go.

Oh well, what do I know? I’m just a stupid 20-something. I guess I should just go back to my BDSM dungeon and let my devastatingly handsome billionaire sugar daddy/master whip me into oblivion.

Ah, girls in NA fiction. Boy, are we one mentally-handicapped bunch.

In modern outlets, twentysomething females are always depicted as hopeless, confused and doe-eyed manchildren who are obsessed with falling in love and finding “the one”. This is particularly true for books about female “new adults”. I get that many of these books are in the chick lit/romance categories, hence the dreamy plotlines, but they aren’t realistic.

Our love lives are but cogs in our complex machineries, and we have a lot more going on than just chasing boys around or, as has been shown ad nauseum, having boys throw themselves at us, confessing their undying devotions. The idea of people being monogamous and pining after THE ONE is kind of whimsical as well, since…. well yea. Our generation isn’t particularly demure.

Also, I don’t think any 22-year olds converse as Carrie & Co. did and that these years are definitely Girls-esque in terms of awkwardness. A lot of NA books have frustrating plotlines that don’t address this fact. We are not aimless birdbrains who run around NYC looking for our very own Mr. Bigs. We have opinions and thoughts and wild nights out. We complain, we binge drink and we break our kneecaps from wearing too-high heels. We are not perfect and boys are not throwing themselves at us while belting out swoon-worthy one-liners that make our hearts melt. We are haphazard human beings who make terrible decisions and ruin our credit scores. I want to read more books that touch upon how we, indeed, decide if we should pay our bills or buy groceries!

I just want to read more about the realities of growing up, not indulge myself in some sappy love story that could have some scenes edited to make it the next Disney movie.

The NA genre is a tricky one in that no one really has a concrete definition for it. Does it encompass everything and anything that involves hopeless twenty-somethings? Is it just about that period of time after one graduates from the clearly-distinguished YA genre?

I do think that the NA genre encompasses much, much more than a defined age group. Hell, there are some 17-year olds who act like they are in their mid-fourties, and vice-versa. Kids straight out of high school might find themselves in similar situations as those who are 22 and freshly graduated from university life. Age is nothing but a number, especially in cases such as these.

In my obnoxious opinion, NA defines that period of time when you’re starting to learn more about your inner voice, your interests and your ambitions–when you’re starting to grow into yourself as a person. This can happen when someone is seventeen or thirty-five.

NA is not just a marketing gimmick but a sound, emerging genre that is just much more prevalent today due to the tumultuous states of the economy and society as a whole. It’s not just an age group or state of mind–it’s a lifestyle, as cheesy as that sounds. And, just because an author uses NA-aged characters, it doesn’t automatically classify the work as NA. I believe that this is a main reason why the genre is getting such a bad rap–many authors are indeed using it as a marketing tool to create sales.

Readers such as myself are actively seeking NA titles out because we want to hear tales about other people who are also going through this transitional phase in life. Sadly, a lot of the authors are yearning to appeal to the NA audience but they really miss the whole point of what the genre is. We don’t want to read about cliches that are constantly touched upon in the parade of New York Times articles about ‘Generation Screwed’. We want to read about real conflicts and feelings! The thoughts that cross members of our generation’s minds are funny, ridiculous, depressing, terrifying and exciting. I want to read these thoughts, get into these characters’ minds and experience what they’re going through WITH them.

We don’t want to read cliched stories about people who are the same age as us, just for the sake of the characters being the same age as us. Elderly people don’t actively seek out only books about elderly people. Teachers don’t only read books about teachers who wear plaid skirts, use yellow #2 pencils and carry around shiny red apples. Why doesn’t that click for the new adult genre as well?