“Oh my G-string, has anyone named their baby Chardonnay yet?!” I think you could be the first alcoholic to claim it!
Seeing is that it’s my birthday and you’ve put me through so much trauma, I expect one of these: http://bit.ly/HN4Kky
“How can my mom expect me to find a job while things are so unresolved with TomKat?” Ask Siri.
“Isn’t it funny that we’ve both never seen a pickle tree before!?” Well I find it funny, but I think for a different reason.
“Don’t rocks originally come from dinosaur poo?” Yes, but now Dwayne Johnson makes them.
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