Mary L. Hamilton's Blog
July 6, 2023
What Treasures Will Your Kids Throw Out When You’re Gone?
Dig deep into my treasure chest–the plastic crate where I keep my personal memorabilia–and you’ll find a baseball. It was a gift from an older guy I had a crush on when I was 12.
The following summer when I was 13, he and my big brother played in a local baseball league. He invited me to their last game to watch him pitch. He allowed only one hit and they won the game. The next day, before leaving to join the Peace Corps, he left behind the game ball, autographed to me with a special message on it. The message is no longer visible, thanks in part to my younger brothers who once thought it would be okay if they used it for batting practice. But more than 50 years later, that ball still hides among my other treasures.
Why am I telling you this?
The main character in my work-in-progress (WIP) runs a professional cleaning and organizing business. So, last month, I interviewed a local woman, a professional organizer with a cleaning business. We spent a fascinating hour chatting about her experiences and the value we put on things that are of little worth to anyone else.
She told of a woman who held onto a chair even though she hated it, thought it was ugly, and had no place in the house where it fit with her other furnishings. She kept it because her mother had told her never to get rid of it. Her mother has since passed on, but she still feels obligated to keep it.
Another family held onto the hair braid of a great-great-ancestor. This ancestor reportedly had such beautiful hair that when she died, her braid was cut off and placed in a flat rectangular box similar to something a necklace might come in. The hair braid has been passed down from generation to generation.
I’d never considered the depth of emotional worth we place on various objects. But my interview made me realize how each item we keep is tagged with emotion. A baseball from someone who made me feel special. A chair that was loved by one’s mother. Even the braid of some long-distant relative has a familial emotion attached to it.
I recall many years ago thinking my mother was silly for buying a trinket from a favorite store when it went out of business.
“She was afraid she’d forget about the store,” my interviewee told me. “The trinket was something to help her remember because our memories aren’t always trustworthy. We forget. So, we keep things to help us remember, to remind us of times and situations and people we’ve enjoyed.” Like souvenirs from vacation trips.
As I thought about her comment, the reason why our children seldom care about the things we treasure became clear. They lack the memories associated with those items. My collection of snowman figurines holds no meaning for my kids who grew up in the South where it seldom snows. And that store that my mother wanted to remember? It wasn’t just the place where we got our camera film developed. It was primarily a gift store that sold Scandinavian-themed merchandise—an important aspect for Mom whose father was from Sweden and whose mother was first-generation Norwegian-American.
By the way, this woman’s #1 piece of advice? “The best thing you can do for your kids is get rid of your junk.”
What are you holding onto because of the memories associated with it?
**Excerpted from my monthly newsletter. Subscribe to avoid missing additional news, book recommendations, writing progress reports, and other fun updates.
The post What Treasures Will Your Kids Throw Out When You’re Gone? appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
June 13, 2023
Sale on Pendant: A Novel of Mystery and Suspense
AmazonKoboB&N, Apple, and other retailers
The post Sale on Pendant: A Novel of Mystery and Suspense appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
June 2, 2023
Battling Discouragement in Writing
The post Battling Discouragement in Writing appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
May 26, 2023
Keys to Self-Worth
My dad’s key ring was loaded with keys. As the director of a Christian youth camp, he carried keys to ten cabins, the kitchen and dining hall, staff houses, vehicles and garages, a boat house, snack shop, bookstore, offices…. His multitude of keys hung on a retractable chain clipped onto his belt, creating a soft metallic jangle when he walked. To my young mind, those keys represented my dad’s importance. No one else carried that many keys around (except for the man in charge of facilities maintenance but apparently, I never noticed his key ring.)
I’ve been contemplating the value we place on ourselves and what gives us a sense of worth. Dad’s keys symbolized an external importance based on his job, much a like CEO’s corner office. But self-worth needs internal validation. It can come from reaching a personal goal such as finishing a race, losing weight, or becoming proficient at a new skill or hobby. It can also come from one’s faith.
Usually, our sense of value comes from a combination of both external and internal sources. But when that feeling of importance is missing, we question our worth, our purpose in being here on this earth. As a stay-at-home mother of young children, I knew I was important to the care of my children but my internal convictions about raising and training the next generation sometimes suffered under the lack of external validation. Writers struggle with this conflict too, spending weeks, months, even years laboring in solitude over a story or article only to have it rejected for publication. It’s easy to feel that all the effort we put into the writing was worthless and give in to the mistaken belief that we have nothing worthwhile to offer.
Several years ago, my son tutored high school students in an upscale community where the pressure to get into an Ivy League school was intense. He wrote up a benediction that he spoke over the students after every tutoring session to encourage them. It went like this:
“Your SAT scores, GPA, and grades in general do not determine your worth and dignity as a human being. There is more to life than school. You have something beautiful and wonderful to give to the world–whether with your intellect or otherwise–and I exhort you to give that good gift to the world.”
When he left, the students had him write it on a whiteboard that they posted on the wall. It was a constant reminder that their worth was not limited to their current situation.
We all need such a reminder now and then. The next time you’re feeling less than worthwhile, substitute your current situation for “SAT scores, GPA, and grades in general.” Then repeat this out loud as often as needed. Or give yourself a pep talk like Jessica. And if that doesn’t work, go find a bunch of keys.
What makes you feel important? Is it your job? Your spouse or partner? Your children or grandchildren? Your faith? Leave a comment and let me know what you think?
(Excerpted from my April newsletter. The May issue comes out next week. If you like this and want to see more, including book progress, reviews and recommendations, and other items, subscribe to my monthly newsletter in the box provided below or to the right.)
The post Keys to Self-Worth appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
May 3, 2023
Dead Air Finals in Directors’ Choice Contest
Winner will be announced at the conference in Asheville, NC at the end of May. The post Dead Air Finals in Directors’ Choice Contest appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
April 13, 2023
The Stuff We Keep
The post The Stuff We Keep appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
March 21, 2023
Love Mysteries and Thrillers?
The post Love Mysteries and Thrillers? appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
January 31, 2023
Bargain Price This Week Only!
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BH1WX3G8
B&N, KOBO, and other retailers: https://books2read.com/Dead-Air-A-Waco-Mystery
The post Bargain Price This Week Only! appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
January 24, 2023
Why Does Everyone Want A Review?
Earlier this month, my husband and I made a reservation for a lake house based on a single positive review. Unfortunately, that review was misleading and we were forced to cancel and request a full refund.
It seems everyone wants a review these days. Online purchases, restaurants, the garage that changes your car’s oil, the post office, the doctor, the dentist, and even the vet all ask you to review your interaction with them. Even authors ask you to leave a review of their book. It’s so annoying!
So how Important Are Reviews?
When you buy a book online, do you check the star rating? Do you look at how many reviews it has? Do you read the reviews before you decide whether to purchase the book?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you have some idea of the importance of those reviews to readers. Now, let me tell you what those reviews do for the authors. (It’s not just because we like compliments on our work, although that’s nice, too!)
A review lets the author know what readers liked about their book. That way, they can continue writing what readers want to read. Even negative comments, if given without malice, can help an author when writing subsequent books.
If you’re deciding between a book that has eight 5-star reviews and another that has 63 reviews with an average of 4.7 stars, you’re probably going to buy the one that has more reviews. This is called social proof. The more reviews a book has, the greater the likelihood that more readers will buy it.
In addition, the more reviews a book has, the more likely Amazon will promote the book among similar titles. And the easier it is for the author to land other advertising promotions, which will hopefully result in more sales so more readers can enjoy the book and the author can afford to keep writing books that readers love.
Many of us would leave a review if only we knew what to say. A simple “I enjoyed this book” is fine. But if you’d like to say more,I’ve included some ideas below that might help. You don’t need to answer all of these. One per review is fine. The important thing is to leave a review.
What I like most about this book is…(the characters, plot, setting, action, themes, it challenges my thinking, kept my attention, pulled me in from the start, etc.)My favorite character is…My favorite scene is….I have (or hope to) read more books by this author.
OR
I didn’t much care for the book because…I didn’t find some of the scenes believable, such as….I couldn’t identify (or couldn’t sympathize) with the main character.The writing style didn’t appeal to me.Of course, I can’t finish without asking if you’ve read any of my books, would you please leave a review? I will be eternally grateful!
Excerpted from my monthly newsletter. Sign up to get updates and news once a month directly to your inbox.
The post Why Does Everyone Want A Review? appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
November 2, 2022
Christian Book Giveaway
The post Christian Book Giveaway appeared first on Mary L. Hamilton.
