Janine Robinson's Blog

Feeling Pressure to Write
About Race?
Don’t Do It!

 

Colleges and universities can no longer use your race as a factor in determining whether to accept you to their schools, since the landmark Supreme Court ruling on June 29th abolished most of Affirmative Action in our country.

Although schools are supposed to be colorblind now, many admissions officers are still on the prowl for minority students who can maintain the diversity on their campuses.

Being Black, Hispanic or Native Indian can still be a huge advantage in getting admitted to your dream school, especially the most competitive ones.

Since you no longer will be asked to check a box about your race, you may want to find other ways to let them know your heritage if you are a minority.

The most obvious place is in your college application essays.

Revealing your Race and Writing about Race are Very Different

That said, I would think twice before writing about the topic of race in general.

There’s a big difference between revealing your individual race in the context of what you have to say in your college app essay and writing about the nature of race or race-related issues as the central topic in your essay.

If you want to let your schools know your race, you can weave in details that will tip them off.

Mention that you were the first Black to join your local birdwatching club.

Or that you often cross the Mexican border in Texas on weekends to visit your grandmother.

Another example would be to talk about how you trained to dance in your first Powwow.

My main message here is that you can allude to your heritage in your essay–if you believe that will give you an advantage–but I don’t think tackling the larger subject of race will help you.

In fact, I think it could hurt.

As I say all over this blog, the main goal of your college application essay to find personal stories to share that will help you stand out from the competition.

The last thing you want is to write about topic that everyone else is using.

And this year, that could very well be the topic of race.

Why?

When the Supreme Court ruled to ban schools from using race as an admissions factor, the main Supreme Court Justice who pushed for this had a lot to say about the admissions process and specifically what students could write about in their essays.

And most of what he said was very confusing. (Not to mention, why does he have the authority to tell students what to write about, in these applications or anywhere? The ruling that effectively banned affirmative action is targeting those at colleges and universities who make the acceptance decisions, not the students who are applying.)

Bad Advice from the Top

In a nutshell, Chief Justice John G. Roberts told the court that it would be okay for schools to ask student applicants to discuss how race (ie discrimination) has affected them in their essays. At the same time, he warned schools not to use the essays to glean students’ individual race to use as a factor in their acceptance.

Yes, a very mixed message.

And one that was blasted out all over the national media.

But just because Roberts had a lot to say about race in college essays–saying that you can write about it in a very specific way–doesn’t mean you should write about it.

He was mainly defending his decision; not worrying about your chances of getting into your dream school.

Here’s one of his quotes on this subject: Nothing in this opinion should be construed as prohibiting universities from considering an applicant’s discussion [eg via their college app essay] of how race affected his or her life, be it through discrimination, inspiration, or otherwise. … A benefit to a student who overcame racial discrimination, for example, must be tied to that student’s courage and determination. Or a benefit to a student whose heritage or culture motivated him or her to assume a leadership role or attain a particular goal must be tied to that student’s unique ability to contribute to the university. In other words, the student must be treated based on his or her experiences as an individual — not on the basis of race.

I believe what Roberts didn’t understand is how admissions officers use these essays.

Or the fundamental fact that schools can only control what they ask students to write about (via essay prompts); they have no control over what students actually write.

At a time when many schools have dropped using standardized tests in the admissions process, the college application essay has become one of the last remaining tools admissions officers can use to select one student over the other.

At the most competitive schools, it’s even more important since so many students share almost identical applications filled with stellar grades, extracurricular activities and impressive accomplishments.

An effective college application essay (personal statement for The Common Application and other applications) must help a student stand out from the competition.

If an essay uses an overdone topic or theme (such as race), the college admissions officers can have a hard time using it to differentiate the writer from other students.

There are many topics that have traditionally been over-used, everything from writing about a torn ACL to a dying beloved grandfather.

Savvy college admissions consultants steer students away from these hackneyed topics for good reason.

Now we have the top judicial leader in the land telling students to write about race.

Ugh!

Pick a Topic that Works Best for You!

Chances are there will be multitudinous college application essays on this topic.

For that reason alone, these essays will not do their job for their authors–no matter how brilliantly they share their personal stories of discrimination or insights on the history of race in our country.

Of course, there could be a few that have an original twist or a personal story that jumps out at the reader.

I feel bad for college admissions officers who could be bombarded with essays on race this year, and lose that critical tool in understanding the unique personalities and character of their applicants–so they can pick the ones they feel will be the best pick at their school.

There are a million other topics out there that will help you showcase your individuality and greatness.

Keep your goal in mind while applying for schools at the top of your mind: you want to get accepted.

So unless the way race has impacted you in your life has been your most life-defining issue and you can find a compelling story to share to illuminate it, pick something else!

If you believe your admission chances could be boosted if a target school learns your race, feel free to weave in information about yourself that will clue them in. If you think it could hurt your chances, leave it out.

I assume colleges and universities are scrambling to adjust their applications and even essay prompts. So keep an eye out for any advice they are sending out in upcoming weeks and months, and hopefully you will get more clarification on this issue. (It’s possible schools will now include a new prompt asking students to write about how race affected them–but I doubt those essays will help admissions officers make their admittance decisions.)

In the meantime, don’t panic and keep your eye on the ball, and start brainstorming the perfect topic for YOU!

Good luck!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The post Race is a Terrible College App Essay Topic appeared first on Essay Hell.

How to Write about Racein your College App EssayPost Affirmative Action

The Supreme Court knocked down Affirmative Action today.

This landmark ruling means colleges and universities will no longer be allowed to use race as a factor in who they admit.

Technically, there will no longer be race-based boxes to check on applications.

Whether you like this or not, the fallout in academia and the college admissions industry will be immediate and confusing.

Without the help of Affirmative Action policies, education officials still pursuing student diversity are expected to start using the college admissions essays as a way to discern students’ racial backgrounds, even though schools are now supposed to be colorblind in their selection process.

My understanding after reading the first round of news articles about the ruling is that it still allows schools to invite applicants to share “how race affected” them in their college application essays.

It’s a massive gray area, however, of how far they will push these efforts, and this coming admissions season could be very challenging for everyone–especially when it comes to interpreting and enforcing the new ruling.

Should You Write About Your Race?

On the other end, students will need to decide if they want to use their college application essays to reveal their racial background, and/or as a platform to discuss “how race affected” them.

To me, this decision mainly depends on whether a student believes their race could help or hurt their admission chances.

And if and how they want to play this high-stakes game.

 

Photo by Miles Peacock

.

Up until now, it was generally considered an advantage if a student was Black or Hispanic, since predominantly white colleges and universities pursued more diversified student bodies in recent decades.

Students who were Asian, however, often found their ethnicity worked against them as they often comprised the highest percentage of applicants, and were turned down despite being among the most academically competitive. Especially at the most prestigious schools.

Sadly, many of my Asian students felt pressure to try to downplay their racial and even cultural backgrounds in their essays, even though those were often fascinating and life-defining influences in their lives.

So if you do want your target schools to know your racial background, how do you write about it in your college application essay?

I assume you can’t get in trouble since it’s the schools that have been banned from using race in their admissions decisions. If you choose to share your race with them, that is not illegal. It’s up to them how they choose to solicit and use that information.

Personally, I don’t think a student should use their race as the main topic of her or his main college app essay. It’s too broad and generic, and would not be effective in setting you apart from other applicants.

However, if you want the school to know your racial background, you can feature that information in the background of your essay, especially if you share a personal story or experience about a quality or activity related to your racial background. (This is based on the advice from a Supreme Court Justice; see below)

Photo by Alexander Gray

 

There are other ways to more subtly reveal your racial background in your essays, if that’s your goal. Often telling details are naturally woven into your storytelling anyway. For instance, you could mention that your family attended the only all-Black church in your small town. Or that your parents were born and raised in Mexico City. Or your grandmother taught you how to make kimchi.

If college admissions officers are actively looking for information about your racial background in these essays, little details like these will deliver the message loud and clear.

How Far Can You Go?

Here’s the best guidance we have so far in how to think about writing about your race in your essay, straight from the Supreme Court Justice most adamantly against affirmative action:

(This is from a story in The New York Times by Stephanie Saul. The link works if you are a subscriber, but it’s behind a paywall.)

In the decision striking down affirmative action policies at Harvard and the University of North Carolina, Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. wrote, “Nothing prohibits universities from considering an applicant’s discussion of how race affected the applicant’s life, so long as that discussion is concretely tied to a quality of character or unique ability that the particular applicant can contribute to the university.”

However, the chief justice also took a shot across the bow at anyone who might be thinking that the essay could be used as a surreptitious means of racial selection.

“Despite the dissent’s assertion to the contrary, universities may not simply establish through the application essays or other means the regime we hold unlawful today,” he wrote, underscoring, “What cannot be done directly cannot be done indirectly.”

Not sure this clarifies things that much. This will be up to the colleges and universities, and their lawyers, to figure out.

Meanwhile, my best advice is to find a college application essay topic that helps you reveal what makes you tick, and share experiences that have defined how you learn and what you most care about. If those are related to your racial background, and/or you want to work in details about your racial background, and they are relevant to your story, go for it!

Or just leave it all out, and keep them guessing.

Don’t let all this distract you from your main goal: to write a college application essay about what makes you tick.

Whether that involves your skin color or not is up to you.

Good luck!

The post How to Write about Race in the College App Essay appeared first on Essay Hell.

ChatGPT Can’t Write Your Essay for You;But Here are 5 Ways It Can Help You Write Your Own

I wrote a previous post about how the new AI bot called ChatGPT would not be able to write your college application essay for you.

At least not yet, and possibly never.

But I believe this writing, editing and research tool can be a powerful help to brainstorming, outlining, drafting and editing your college admission essays.

And it will be especially helpful to any college-bound students who are not confident in their writing skills, as well as international students who are writing in a second language.

I love how this tool can act as a fairness leveler for these essays and the application process!

And it will only get better with time.

First, get a free account and play around with ChatGPT-3 (the latest ChatGPT version).

Go to: Chat.openai.com. (or try this one if the first one isn’t available, it has more options as well: Beta.openai.com/playground)

RELATED: Can ChatGPT Write Your College Application Essay?

How ChatGPT Can Be Your Private Editor

I’ve only messed around with ChatGPT a short time, but I’ve quickly seen ways it can help students with their college admission essays.

So far, this tool mainly can help students generate academic-style essays, with traditional introductions using thesis statements, and a conventional structure and colorless voice.

College application essays are a different beast.

They need to use a more conversational and narrative writing style, and be less formal in voice and style.

The point of these essays is not to inform and impress, but to engage the reader at the start and share some of your personal background and real-life experiences.

The best college application essays are what are known as “slice-of-life” essays, which help reveal your personality and what you care about the most.

So far, you can still do this way better than a robot.

That said, this new tool is whip smart and a fast learner, and already offers help in crafting your college application essays.

But be wary, and make sure you remember the goal of your essay, and what will make it stand out and help differentiate you from other students.

Here Are 5 Ways ChatGPT Can Help You with Your College Admissions Essay:Brainstorming Topic Ideas: To use ChatGPT to help spark a topic idea for your essay, I would start by playing around with the tool. Cast a wide net and just see what it throws back at you. Most likely, it won’t come up with one amazing idea for you, but it could help fire up your memory and help you make connections that lead to other ideas. For instance, take one of your more unusual interests, hobbies or activities, and ask it to “Generate 5 ideas on bug collecting.” Or “Generate ideas about roller coasters.” Just see what it spits out. Chances are the ideas will be on the generic side. Keep going. Ask it to give you more examples, or quotes, or poems, news articles, sources on that topic. Keep telling it what you want. The more specific your topics, the more specific the info it will give you.
Make sure to first learn what makes a great college application topic so you know what you are looking for: 5 Top Tips on Finding Topics. You also can use this approach for collecting background on any topic as well that you want to include in your essay, whether it’s an abstract concept such as freedom, social justice, diversity…or a more concrete subject, like mountain biking, jazz greats, karaoke, OCD, video games, etc.Generate an Outline: Although I teach students to use an outline that deviates from the traditional 5-paragraph outline for essays, I think this tool can help you organize parts of your essay. You will need to experiment and use your judgment to determine if you like the suggested structure. Direct the tool to “Generate an outline on (topic)” and see if you find it helpful.
You could take a rough draft of your essay and ask it to generate an outline to see how it organizes what you have written, and then move the chunks around how you want (“Generate an outline on this essay” and paste essay after). I advise students to ditch the 5-paragraph outline and instead start their essays with an example of their main point, in the form of an anecdote (mini-story) to engage the reader at the start.Expand or condense: ChatGPT-3 works as your personal editor to either expand your writing on an idea or topic, or condense or summarize something you have written. Again, it’s imperfect, since it, not you, decides what is important to keep or chop. But if nothing else, it gives you an idea of how to both.
If you ask it to expand on an idea or topic, it often will bring in new information, details or examples that you didn’t have before, and then you can decide whether to use them or not. This is amazing if you run out of things to say about a topic, or have said too much and need to fit a word count.Re-writing: Sometimes you need a new way to say the same thing. ChatGPT can take a sentence or paragraph(s) you have written and re-write them in fresh language. This is incredibly powerful, especially in these college application essays where you often have a specific value or personal quality you are showcasing in your essay, and find yourself using the same words. Just take what you have written and direct it to “Rewrite this sentence.”
Again, use the results as raw copy and read it out loud and play with the words until YOU like how they sound and work. Never relinquish control of what you want to say to what ChatGPT-3 churns out. Since college application essays are written in the first-person, experiment with including asking it to put copy it generates in the first-person to see how it’s done. Example: “Rewrite this paragraph using the first-person.”Proofreading: ChatGPT-3 is a brilliant fact-checker and proofreader. Take your draft, at any point in the process, and ask it to “proofread” or “fact check” your essay or paragraph or whatever. Compare the results. Again, you need to give it the final read. You have worked hard on your essay, so why not use every tool to make it as flawless as possible. One red flag on proofreaders: Whether they are robots or humans: It’s important to keep your casual voice in these college application essays.
Often, others will catch what they think are errors, but what are actually deliberate, yet unconventional style decisions that create your narrative style and voice (such as contractions, everyday language or jargon, etc). Keep these if they work! Never let any proofreader flatten or take the life out of your essay.

This should help get you started using ChatGPT with your college application essays. Experiment, play and have some fun. Use it wisely.

Good luck!

 

The post How to Use ChatGPT for a College Application Essay appeared first on Essay Hell.

Sorry, Artificial Intelligence Won’t Save YouFrom the Dreaded College App Essay.Yet.

When I first heard about ChatGPT, and how this new artificial intelligence bot could write academic essays for students–and their teachers couldn’t tell the difference–I thought, “Ugh oh, looks like no one is going to need my services anymore” for help writing their college application essays.

Apparently, the bot generates essays that even fool Turnitin.com. Yikes!

Of course, the education world is freaking out. There’s talk of returning to pen and paper for essay assignments.

At the moment, the ChatGPT model is free. So I tried it out.

(See below for what it wrote when I entered: “Write a college application essay”)

My goal was to see if ChatGPT could write a college application essay.

Based on my results, it failed.

Why?

Because college application essays are different from the academic essays students write for English courses or other subjects.

They aren’t pedantic or simply about the facts and information.

College application essays have to be about you–so no two are alike.

The more personal and unique the essay, the more effective it will be in landing you in your dream school.

Finding Your Personal Stories Will Be More Important Than Ever!

With this new AI technology, that becomes even more important!

That’s the whole reason colleges have you write them.

They want to see how you are different from everyone else.

And the best ones capture your personality, character and feelings–revealing what you care more about and why.

Even the most sophisticated Artificial Intelligence robot can’t do that for you.

At least not so far.

Personally, I don’t feel threatened by this new technology, either for my job as a writing coach here, or for the future of all essays and writing and language.

A friend equated it to the development of calculators.

Yes, people could suddenly do crazy equations they couldn’t do nearly as fast on paper or at all.

But calculators didn’t replace math, or the need for us to learn and use it.

They have found their place as another knowledge tool.

I believe ChatGPT and other writing/editing bots will do the same thing.

It’s a new tool and we should embrace it, not fear it.

If you have time and interest, check it out!

It’s mind-blowing to say the least.

Right now it’s free and open to the public as a Beta.

Go to: Chat.openai.com. (or try this one for more options: Beta.openai.com/playground)

Get an account, read the directions and have at it.

Enter “college application essay” and your own name.

It seems to get more specific info on you if you include keywords about yourself that would narrow the field.

My understanding is that ChatGPT has many options to let you direct it to generate more specific information, and even “teach” it things.

Crazy!

I kept it simple, entering only my son’s name and our hometown.

It generated a bunch of background that was about halfway true. (You can see results below.)

I would be very wary of the information this generates about you, and double check all the facts.

From my preliminary experiments, it seems too good at making stuff up.

Which we writers call The Art of BS.

Also, notice that the ChatGPT writing is straight-forward and dry (i.e., boring to read)

We Need to Learn How to Use ChatGPT to Help Write College Application Essays

A powerful college application essay uses a different style of writing, called narrative writing.

It uses the first-person (I, me, you, us…) and creative writing techniques, such as anecdotes (mini-stories), descriptive language, dialogue, etc…

A powerful college application essay also engages the reader at the start. Very important!!

These ChatGPT generated essays start by stating general facts and have no “hook.”

They were also very general. To get personal, you need details. And lots of them!

But see for yourself!

Try Out ChatGPT While It’s Free!

I would enter your name, your city, maybe name of your high school, and other touch points in your life.

Like your parent’s names, any specific organizations you belonged to, any specific clubs or jobs.

I’m NO expert on ChatGPT, but I believe that could help it generate more details about you.

For your college application essay, ChatGPT might be handy in giving you some material about yourself that you hadn’t thought of.

But overall, I think you can do better by collecting your information on your own.

My main advice, offered in posts all over this blog for how to write an effective college application essay, is to brainstorm real-life events, moments or experiences you had, and use those to write about yourself.

I don’t think this AI bot can help you find those. (But who knows?)

Maybe it could tweak your memory for some good real-life experiences.

Why not give ChatGPT a try?

But I think if you want to write a killer college application essay about yourself, you are still pretty much on your own.

And of course, there’s plenty of help all over this blog!

For now, I’m also still available as a real person to help if you need it.

Good luck!

(I will be posting tips and advice on how to use ChatGPT in brainstorming and writing your college application essays. Follow me to be alerted to my upcoming posts!)

Here are results of my playing around with ChatGPT:

ENTERED: “Write a college application essay”

RESULTS: “Throughout my life, I have been driven by a passion for learning, an insatiable curiosity, and an innate drive to succeed. This has been apparent in my academic pursuits and extracurricular activities alike. I have always wanted to challenge myself, to push the boundaries of my knowledge and capabilities, and to face new experiences with enthusiasm and determination. When I began high school, I was eager to explore the opportunities that lay before me. I was a member of several organizations and clubs, and I took on leadership positions in many of them. I excelled academically, and I was rewarded for my hard work with several awards and honors. I was also able to take advantage of the many educational opportunities offered by my school, and I was able to gain a deeper understanding of my interests and passions. My enthusiasm for learning and my dedication to excellence have been the driving forces behind my success. I believe that college will offer me the opportunity to explore my interests further and to challenge myself in ways that I could not have done in high school. I am confident that I will be able to make the most of my education, and I am eager to take on the challenges that college will bring. I know that I have the drive and determination to succeed in college, and I hope that my commitment to learning and my enthusiasm for knowledge will be seen in my application. I am confident that I will be able to make the most of my college experience and that I will be able to use my education to make a positive difference in the world.”

ENTERED: “Write a college application essay about me”

RESULTS: “My name is Jonathan Smith, and I‘m a senior at XYZ High School. I‘m applying to college to pursue a degree in biology with a focus on environmental science. I‘m passionate about the environment, and I believe that my background and interests make me an ideal candidate for your program. Growing up, I was always very curious and inquisitive about the world around me. I was always asking questions and trying to figure out how things worked. In high school, I was able to hone this curiosity by taking advanced science courses such as AP Biology and Chemistry. These courses allowed me to explore various scientific topics in greater depth, while also giving me the opportunity to participate in lab experiments. I have also been involved in a number of extracurricular activities, such as the student government and the Environmental Club. Through these activities, I have had the chance to learn more about the environment and the ways in which we can protect it. I have also been able to take part in various outreach programs, such as beach clean–ups and tree–planting events. These experiences have deepened my understanding of the importance of taking action to protect our planet. I am confident that my scientific background, enthusiasm for the environment, and commitment to taking…

ENTERED: “Write a college application essay about Janine Robinson of Essay Hell”

RESULTS: Janine Robinson is an amazing role model for aspiring college students. She is the founder of Essay Hell, an educational website that provides guidance and resources to help high school and college students write effective college application essays. Janine has been a source of inspiration to many young people who have used her advice and guidance to successfully complete their college applications. Janine‘s journey began when she was a high school student herself. She was an excellent student and had an impressive academic record, but she was completely lost when it came to writing her college application essays. After struggling to write her essays for several weeks, she decided to take a different approach and started researching the craft of writing essays. She studied the best essay writers, analyzed the structure of successful essays and even attended workshops on the subject. By the time she was finished, Janine had become an expert on college application essay writing. She realized that there were many other students who were in the same boat, who were facing the same struggles she had faced. This inspired her to create Essay Hell, a website where students can find the guidance and resources they need to write effective, compelling college application essays. Through Essay Hell, Janine has helped thousands of students get into their dream schools. She has provided them with the knowledge and confidence they need to write their essays, and has given them the courage to submit their applications. Janine has also used her platform to provide students with resources to help them make informed decisions about their college career paths. Janine Robinson is a true hero in the world of college admissions. She has used her knowledge and experience to provide countless students with the assistance they need to write effective essays and to find their paths to success. Her work is an inspiration to all and she is an exemplary role model for aspiring college students.

(Most of this information about me is pure BS. It captures some facts about me and my background, but a lot of it is highly embellished and flat wrong.)

ENTERED: “Write a college application essay about XXX (my son’s name) Robinson from Laguna Beach”

RESULTS: XXX Robinson is an inspiring young man from Laguna Beach, California who is driven to make the most of his academic and extracurricular opportunities. His accomplishments speak for themselves: he is an AP Scholar with Distinction and a National Merit Scholar, and he has achieved a 4.0 GPA while taking a rigorous course load of AP classes. XXX’s commitment to excellence is also evident in his extracurricular activities. He is a percussionist in the Laguna Beach High School marching band, and is a leader on the field. He serves as the vice president of the school’s robotics team, and is a member of the National Honor Society. XXX also volunteers at the local animal shelter, dedicating his time to helping homeless animals find loving homes. What truly sets XXX apart, however, is his commitment to his community. He is a dedicated philanthropist, having raised thousands of dollars for the preservation of Laguna Beach’s coastal environment. He is also a dedicated mentor, having founded a program to help underprivileged students prepare for college. XXX Robinson is a passionate and driven individual who exhibits extraordinary academic and extracurricular accomplishments. He also demonstrates a commitment to helping others, which makes him an outstanding candidate for college admission. He has the potential to make a positive impact on campus and the world beyond.

(This is pretty hilarious to me. They got some of it right, but almost all details are way off. He was a top student but not a National Merit Scholar, and he played trumpet instead of percussion in the marching band, he never volunteered at the animal shelter, and he was not a “philanthropist, having raised thousands of dollars …” The takeaway for me on this one, having entered the real name of a student and hometown, is that the ChatGPT bot recognized him on some level, but made up a bunch of stuff that was untrue. So if you try this yourself to generate background on yourself, be careful! Truth matters, especially in these essays.)

 

The post Can ChatGPT Write Your College Application Essay? appeared first on Essay Hell.

Are you stuck in Essay Hell yet?

The season is upon us.  Woot woot!

Finding a great topic can be challenging.

And then turning that into a written piece that sets you apart from other college applicants, and reveals your unique personality and character, even harder.

But let me show you a way to make the process simple, and effective.

Start here: Think of a time you faced some type of problem.

Don’t over think it.

Avoid trying to brainstorm one that was impressive.

Stick to something simple.

It could be as basic as…

The time you had an argument with your mom.

Or the time you borrowed your brother’s electric bike and crashed it.

Or the time you got obsessed with a board game.

Or the time you got a brush stuck in your crazy curly hair.

Or the time you forgot a huge order while working at a restaurant.

Or the time you lost a dog while pet sitting.

Or the time you got lost riding the public bus.

Or the time you sang in public for the first time and everyone laughed.

Other problem ideas?

A time you made a mistake. A time you had an obstacle to overcome. A time you faced a challenge. A time you messed up something. A time that a personal “flaw” (physical or emotional) caused an issue for you. A time you dealt with a change in your life.

Okay, so got something? Don’t worry if you don’t think it’s essay material.

The point of this exercise is to learn how you can spin almost any problem–big or small–into a compelling college application essay.

Here’s how it works in a narrative (story-telling) essay style, what is known as a slice-of-life essay about yourself:

FIRST: You share the problem–tell what happened. Write it out in a paragraph or two. Try to capture the peak of the experience or moment, and summarize the rest.

Just write like you talk. Simply tell the reader what happened, when, where, what, who, and why.

SECOND: Write a paragraph explaining how you handled that problem.

What did you do about it? Don’t worry if you didn’t solve the problem–most problems we only manage anyway.

Just say what steps you took. First you did this, then you did that, etc.

So you now should have 2-3 paragraphs. Don’t make them perfect. Just get it out.

THIRD: Take a moment to think about that problem and what you did about it. Time for some reflection.

Write a paragraph (or two) “looking back” at what happened to see what you learned.

You can even start with “Looking back, I now realize that…” if that helps you get going.

There’s no wrong or right here.

Try to explain what you think you learned from dealing with the problem.

Share anything that you used (mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, etc.) to manage that problem.

See if you spot a personal quality or characteristic that you used in this process. How did it help you handle the problem?

Look for any way that this experience caused a change or shift in how you think about yourself and the world.

What you are doing here is analyzing what happened, and taking a look at yourself so you can reveal how you operate in the world, and what experiences and values guide you–and most importantly, how you think and learn.

If a personal quality or characteristic bubbles up to the surface as you do this reflection, see if you can expand even more on it. How did you get that way? Has that personal quality or characteristic (aka “the way you ARE”) helped you in other parts of your life? Consider sharing those other examples.

For example, if you shared a simple problem you faced, and in reflection, see that you are a nurturing person, that could help bring a focus to your essay. In sum, your essay could be about how this personal quality (being nurturing) has helped define who you are.

TO REVIEW:

You start the essay by sharing “a time” you had a basic problem (challenge, obstacle, mistake, set-back, conflict, change….) in your life, and how your nurturing side helped you manage the problem somehow. In this reflection, you could weave in a couple other examples of times in your life that you used this quality.

In essence, you are making a case in your personal statement about how you are, at your core, and sharing and examining and explaining, your opinions and ideas on how you got that way (in this case “nurturing”), what you have learned about yourself as someone who is this way (nurturing), and how this has affected your life (the good and bad of being nurturing, though, mainly the good.)–and the big takeaway: Why this matters. Why does it matter to you, others and the world that you are this way (nurturing.)

Your quality could be any type of personal descriptor: nurturing, competitive, disciplined, bossy, patience, impatient, creative, insightful, witty, perfectionist, clumsy, …

This is a lot to take in at once.

But if you kinda get it, go back and read this again and go through the steps.

Force yourself to write out “chunks” of sentences about yourself in this order. Work quickly and sloppy is fine!

Share some problem that happened to you.Explain what you did about it.Look back and expound on what you learned from that process–mainly about yourself.

If you crank out a decent “chunk” (a paragraph or two) for each of these, you will be pleasantly surprised to find yourself with a rough draft of a personal statement essay–perfect for the Common Application and other college admissions applications.

Of course, it’s rough. So you then go through the process of self-editing. Read it, fix what you don’t like, smooth your transitions, cut out parts you don’t need, correct parts that don’t make sense, add more ideas and insights if there’s room, support general statements with specific examples and details, etc.

Hopefully, you see how you can take almost any everyday problem and spin it into an essay about who you are. If you don’t love the problem you picked, keep brainstorming.

The best problems are those that are interesting to tell. Since that makes them interesting to read as well!

The cool thing is that most problems, when we tell them to others, are relatively interesting and even entertaining. THAT IS WHAT YOU WANT!!

This entire blog is packed with more information on this exact process, so keep reading. If you want a more thorough step-by-step guide, buy my book, Escape Essay Hell, or my online essay writing bootcamp course.

If you want to see how a whole bunch of students like yourself turned their problems into awesome essays, read some sample essays. Here are more excellent sample essays.

Okay, so no more excuses! Just pick a problem and pound out a rough draft.

Yes, it can be that easy!

Good luck!!

 

 

 

 

 

The post My 2022 Essay Primer to Get You Started appeared first on Essay Hell.

I’m excited to work with students this summer who get to attend the My Pathway to College pre-college experience in sunny San Diego. During the weeklong conference, which will be held on the gorgeous campus at the University of San Diego (the private liberal arts college; not to be confused with the University of California at San Diego campus), I will take students through the process of writing their college application essays.

We will start with my popular, interactive brainstorming exercises that help students find that magic topic to help their applications stand out among the pack. Then I guide them to craft narrative-style, slice-of-life essays that showcase their unique personalities and character.

They will practice the most effective writing techniques, such as anecdotes, to power their essays and bring depth and meaning. At the end, they will learn tips and advice on self-editing and polishing their work. The goal is that students come home with a completed personal statement essay (often known as the “CommonApp Essay,” which they can use with their Common Application and other college or university applications.

To me, one of the best ways to help students decide where to apply to college is to spend time on campuses. This conference goes one step further, and invites students to actually live at one of the top liberal arts college campuses with other college-bound friends, where they will live in student dorms and dine together.

I have had the pleasure of working with the sponsor of the conference, Jennifer MacLure, an independent college admissions counselor from My Pathway to College, in the past, and am confident she and her team will create an exciting, supportive and productive environment for her lucky students.

Check out the video (above) that she put together on this conference so you can learn more about it, and if it’s something you or someone you know would be interested. Good luck!

 

The post Exciting Pre-College Conference this Summer in San Diego! appeared first on Essay Hell.

 

As a writing coach for college application essays, I receive many drafts from students (and their parents) who want to know if their essay is any good.

More often than not, I have to tell them it’s not. After doing this for over a decade now, I can usually tell within less than a minute.

Though I hate to deliver the bad news, I’m always confident they can do way better.

College admissions officers also have this skill. It comes with reading hundreds to thousands of essays.

These gatekeepers might not know exactly why an essay was bad, but they will either struggle to get through it, find it off-putting, forget it the second they read the next essay, get sleepy, or toss it in the reject pile.

I believe a lot of students (and their parents) already suspect their essays weren’t perfect when they shared them with me. But it’s very painful to be told they are bad and to start over. No one likes rejection.

Better rejected by me, however, than your target schools. Right?

So, how can you tell if yours sucks or not?

I will share with you some of the types of essays I received just over the last couple weeks, and why I knew immediately they needed a do-over.

The hard part is that these students spent hours, days and weeks toiling on their essays. Many were actually quite well written. They had a solid structure, the language mechanics were all clean and they included a lot of good ideas and insights.

But most of them still sucked. At least when held up to the standards of what makes one of these personal statements effective.

RELATED: What Makes a College Application Great

Here are some examples of good essays that sucked:

An essay all about the student’s love of playing instruments, mainly in the school band. It was readable and outlined the student’s experiences with different instruments.
Why it sucked: The topic was too general. And cliche, since many students write about this topic. (As an overdone topic, band is up there with sports. Keep brainstorming!)
My main advice: Pick a new topic, one that is unusual or unique. It does not need to be impressive. If you still want to write about your music, get a focus. Don’t try to tell the reader about playing all your instruments. Instead, find one moment or time when you were playing one instrument, and expand on what you learned from that experience, beyond just playing music.An essay about a student’s autism. It was very well organized, presented the points in a logical way and was loaded with wisdom and intellect.
Why it sucked: The essay was too formal and pedantic. There were few real-life examples and the introduction was general and not engaging. I didn’t get any sense of the writer’s personality.
My main advice: Rework it into a more narrative (story-telling) style. Weave in more everyday moments and experiences to make it more personal. Even better, start the piece with a mini-story that illustrates the main point you want to make about yourself.An essay about an experience the student had as a Boy Scout patrol leader. It started with an interesting story from one of his outings in the wilderness.
Why it sucked: The topic was a yawner, and one that’s used too often. I think the only people eager to read about Boy Scouts are former Boy Scouts. (Hey, I love scouting. Both my husband and son were Eagle Scouts!) Also, the story took up the entire essay.
My main advice: Pick a different topic that doesn’t feature Boy Scouts. And, condense the main story and spend at least half, if not more, of the piece explaining and exploring why that story and your experience mattered to you, and the world. The best essays use real-life stories, but they are shared to reveal more than only what happened. You have to let the reader know what you learned from that experience and why you valued it.

Essays that suck have a lot of value. I love when students show me their drafts, even when they miss the mark of an effective personal statement. Almost always there’s a nugget of an idea for a topic, or something that points in the right direction.

They also usually have fleshed out many of their thoughts, opinions and insights on what they care deeply about. Students are often able to use a lot of the ideas, examples and insights from these drafts, even if they overhaul the structure or even change topics.

“Shitty rough drafts” are part of the writing process. (Thank you, author and writing teacher extraordinaire Anne Lamott.) So keep cranking out those college application essays that suck! If you do your homework, you are on your way to writing one that rocks.

 

 

 

The post Your College App Essay Sucks. That’s OK! appeared first on Essay Hell.

Brand Yourself
by Writing Focused
College App Essays

I avoided writing about how to brand yourself with these college application essays for years now. The thought of branding sounded crass and commercial.

Truth is, applying to college is a giant sales job. And these admissions essays are your sales pitch. You are selling yourself.

And as all marketers know, the best way is to brand yourself.

What is a brand? It’s effectively an image or message that sums up what you are all about, at your essence. Think McDonald’s Golden Arches, or the Nike “Swoosh,” or the Twitter blue bird, or Apple’s, well, apple.

When you see their logos, you instantly know what they represent. They jump out at you, and you will never forget them, even if you want to.

An effective college application essay does the same thing as these brands but instead of using images and catch phases, they let you use about 500-650 words on average to make your mark.

The very best ones, however, are those that work exactly like a name brand.

One–they pop. That is, what you have to say jumps off the page at the reader, grabs their attention at the start and makes them care about what they are reading.

Two–they sum up what you stand for, at your core. Maybe it’s your quirky sense of humor, or your tendency toward perfectionism, or your commitment to social justice. A strong essay reveals something about your personality and character — both your individual style in the world (personality) and what you care about the most (character).

Three–they are memorable. A great essay leaves an impression that is hard to forget. After reading your essay, a college admissions officer should be able to recall your essay with a simple phrase or sentence when describing it to others. They should be able to call out or refer to your essay (and application) by saying something like this: “How about that girl who smiled too much?” or “Remember the kid who was obsessed with rollercoasters?” or “Let’s talk more about the student who always spilled coffee at Duncan Donuts.” (I have an entire post on this idea of making a lasting impression in How Will the Dub You.)

Four–keep your message sharp and focused. Notice that a powerful brand usually says, actually shouts, only one thing. And that one thing represents everything it stands for. In your essays, the best tip for branding yourself is to say ONE main point about yourself, and then expand upon that idea. You can’t tell a college everything in one short essay, so you must pick one core part of yourself to showcase. This is how you keep your essay focused and on point, just like a name brand. This post about The Main Point of Your College App Essay will teach you exactly how to do this.

How do you brand yourself with your college app essay? Write a good one!

An effective essay will check many boxes, just like a powerful name brand. It will help differentiate you from others, it will convey what you stand for (what you care about) and it will be hard to ignore or forget.

Like creating a name brand, writing an essay that captures who you are at your core takes research, imagination, courage and practice.

Here are some of my best posts I have written to get you on your way:

What Makes a College Application Essay Great?

The Secret to a Killer College Application Essay

#Selfie: 5 Ways It’s Like Your College Application Essay

Essay Topics That Worked

How to Write Your College App Essay in 3 Steps

Good luck!

The post 4 Sizzling Tips to Brand Your College App Essays appeared first on Essay Hell.

Beware of the New Feel-Good Prompt for 2021-2022

I wish I could say I was grateful for the newest essay prompt added this year by the Common Application:

4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you?

The Common App folks seem to be trying to inject some upbeat energy to the application process by asking students to focus on something positive in their lives. I assume it’s a reflection of the exhaustion and stress from the endless months of Covid and an attempt to throw students a softball prompt to focus on something, or more specifically someone, good, generous and hopeful in their lives.

They make a big deal about trying to bring “some joy” into the application process (details in the blue link below). Sorry to be cynical, but I don’t think that’s going to work here. In fact, I think it could backfire for many students.

RELATED: 2021-2022 Common App Essay Prompts

Don’t get me wrong. I love the concept of gratitude. As a kid, my mom always made us list 10 things we were grateful for whenever we were feeling down or starting whining about our lives. It was a remarkably powerful at shifting our perspective, and I love that it’s on trend today. I still make my gratitude lists.

However, as an essay prompt for a college admissions essay, I find it ineffective. To me, prompts should help students find experiences, moments and times in their lives where they can reveal how they think and feel, and then reflect on how they got that way and why it matters.

Ironically, I thought one of the best prompts was the one this gratitude one replaced, which asked students to share a problem they faced, and how they handled it. Apparently, it was not used by many students, so they scrapped it.

I’m wary of prompts that don’t encourage students to take a hard look at themselves and the obstacles or challenges they have faced. To me, these make the best essays, since the students can share interesting real-life stories where they had to change, grow and ultimately learn something about themselves. The essays where something happened are the most compelling to read–which is so important to stand out in the crowd–and they also allow students to delve deeper into their life lessons.

This new prompts seems to focus more on positive vibes and feelings than thinking and learning. There’s nothing wrong with acknowledging someone who has helped us, but stories are only interesting if they first involve some type of problem.

Problems are Your Friend in Essays

If you choose to write an essay about someone you are grateful for, most likely because they helped you in some way handle a problem in your life, make sure to first share the story behind why you needed help–a problem you faced (an obstacle, challenge, mistake, setback, etc.). This will give your essay more substance and interest to draw in your reader. Then you can go onto reflecting about what you learned from this challenge, and how and why you are grateful for whoever it was that helped your handle or manage that problem.

To me, the biggest potential pitfall of this new prompt would be students who write their entire essay about a person they are grateful for, and make the entire essay about that person. That would be a terrible essay, no matter how wonderful the other person was.

Example of terrible essay: “My mom has always been there for me. Whenever I’ve been down or struggling, she would some in my room and let me vent my feelings. Even when I came home with a low grade in math, she would give me a hug and encourage me to keep doing my best. I’m so grateful for her and everything she has done for me. She has sacrificed so much for me and my family. ….”

While you may have a supermom, and are extremely grateful for her, she most likely would not make a great topic for your common app essay.

The Major Pitfall of This New Prompt

These essays need to be about YOU! Yes, you can talk about another helpful person, and why you were grateful for them, but the bulk of your essay must be about you, and the issue you faced, and what YOU did to deal with it, and then how you got an assist from someone else, and then how that made you feel–grateful. Showing gratitude is a wonderful way to show colleges that you have a mature view of life–that you are not overly self-involved, or entitled or full of yourself. It reveals humility.

This is all great. But you only need to share this in a sentence or two. Gratitude is not that complicated. It means you understand that you got some help, and are thankful for it. If you want to expand more on gratitude, you could reflect further on why you think being thankful is important, why it matters to you and your life and the world. (The key to meaningful reflection is to stay specific and personal, and not launch into cliches or generalizations. Those get dull quickly. That’s another reason I think this prompt is loaded. Beware!)

If this prompt triggers a great personal story for you and you want to give it a go, do it. Just beware of the possible pitfalls I mentioned above. Make sure the essay is mainly about you. If you go on and on about how wonderful some person is in your life, you essay will be dull and ineffective. I would stay clear of writing about obvious people to be grateful for, like your parents or other family members. I believe that’s why the prompt mentions “in a surprising way.” They want the person you are grateful for to be unexpected in some way.  Is there someone you would never have thought would have helped you? That might work.

In general, I would advise my students to stay clear of this essay prompt. It’s attractive because it’s so feel-good. But I think it could be hard to spin it into a strong essay. Not impossible. But hard. The other prompts are a lot better.

And remember, you can write about any topic you want (see the last prompt, No. 7).

Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you’ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

So find your best stories, where you were challenged and had interesting experiences, and go with those.

Even if your essay involves a hard time you had, or a problem you faced, it doesn’t mean your essay will be a downer. Once you share your experience in your essay, you simply need to shift into a reflective mode and share what you learned from that experience (problem). That is almost always very positive and inspiring.

Good luck!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you?

The post Why I’m Not Grateful for the Newest Common App Essay Prompt appeared first on Essay Hell.

A Great Essay Topic? Anything But the Coronavirus!

When counseling students on finding great topics for their college application essays, I often direct them to explore problems they have faced in their lives.

Problems provide the perfect springboard for writing a compelling personal statement. (Problems = challenge, obstacle, mistake, flaw, phobia, conflict, change, etc.) If you faced a problem, big or small, it means that:

1. Something interesting and personal happened

2. You had to deal with it

3. You learned something

This simple framework can help you share your personal stories in your essay, and then also examine, explore and share how they shaped you and what you care about (your values).

And voila! A college application essay that is engaging, meaningful and memorable.

RELATED: Use this post to learn how to write about a problem for your personal statement essay.

So if this simple approach works, and all you need is a juicy problem to spin into an effective essay, wouldn’t you want to write about the biggest problem the world is facing right now?

A global pandemic that has literally shut down life as we know it, killed hundreds of thousands of innocent people, snuffed out jobs, forced families to hide in their homes and has no clear end in sight?

Isn’t that the perfect topic?

Well, no.

If you can avoid it, I would strongly advise you find almost any other topic to write about than the Coronavirus.

RELATED: Read this post to learn how to find an awesome topic

The main reason I don’t think it would serve you is that Covid-19 is a problem shared by all of us, including all other students writing these essays. It’s simply too common.

When a topic is common or overdone, it is more difficult to make it interesting.

One of the main goals of these college application essays is to help differentiate students from the competition–other students. If your topic is one that many others will be writing about, you are already fading into the crowd.

Of course, there are exceptions to my advice to steer clear of the Covid essay topic. Here’s the main one I can think of:

Your Covid experience has impacted you in a way that is far different than how it has affected almost all other people. I would say it would need to be something extreme, or highly unexpected, or unusual. Even better, somehow bizarre, or shocking. (Remember, it probably feels as though it has hit you harder than others, but chances are your experience isn’t as radical as it feels. That’s just the nature of this nightmare–everyone feels as though their life has been turned upside down on some level.)

Tragically, those students hardest hit by this pandemic, with parents and loved ones losing jobs, losing homes or getting evicted, or even worse, falling ill, simply aren’t that unusual. (These, however, are the exact students who MUST share their Covid hardships elsewhere in the Common Application, which I talk about next.)

I also want to flag the idea that finding the positive in your Covid-19 experience, or that you are actually enjoying this time, would not be enough of a “spin” to justify Covid as a topic.

I believe admissions officials are trying to discourage students from using this as their main college app essay (aka personal statement) topic as well.

The Common Application has added an additional, special prompt where students can share their Covid experiences if they feel the pandemic has slammed their world in under 250 words. The Coalition Application (an alternative to The Common Application) has offered a similar Covid prompt. To me, this implies colleges want students to save their main essay topic for anything but Covid.

RELATED: Here’s the New Covid-19 Prompt from the Common Application

Even though this new short Covid prompt is optional, I would highly encourage students to address it, since I can’t imagine anyone not impacted by Covid. This is an additional opportunity in your application to share something about yourself.

Since it’s so short, my advice would be to be direct in your answer. To give it focus and interest, I would try to think of one or two qualities or values that you used or developed in adapting to the new pandemic reality and related challenges. And brainstorm specific examples you can use to illustrate them.

Then share a specific challenge you faced due to Covid, and explain how you handled or managed that problem, and end with what you learned (related to a personal quality, characteristic or value).

A simple outline would look like this:

Share an example of a problem you faced related to Covid
Explain how it affected you
Describe how you dealt with it
Reflect on what you learned from handling it (about yourself, others and the world)

As far as your main personal statement or CommonApp essay topic, try to brainstorm beyond the pandemic as much as possible.

Of course, you can mention Covid and the pandemic as part of the background of your essay. It most likely will be hard to escape.

Be do whatever you can to steer clear of coronavirus as your main topic or focus of your essay. I simply don’t believe it will serve you as well as almost any other topic at this point.

Good news? There are plenty of other problems out there. Start brainstorming!

This is a totally weird time. Applying for college can be very stressful even in the good old days. So take deep breaths, know you are not alone and press forward. You got this!

 

The post Beware Covid and the College Application Essay appeared first on Essay Hell.