Aiden Lottering's Blog

Staring down the barrel of a silver handgun, the shopkeeper had no idea what was happening until the command came. “Give me all of your money or I swear I will kill you on the spot!”. Eyes wide with Adrenalin and laced with doubt, was staring at the shopkeeper from behind the barrel of the gun. With sweaty palms, the shopkeeper opened up the cash register and started taking out all the money.  “Is there anything else I can help you with sir?” asked the shopkeeper with a sincere smile. Taken aback by the reaction, the man in the mask hesitated. “What do you mean?” he asked. “I just think that money is only one small part of the problems you are struggling with at this present time, am I right?” With his heart pounding in is chest, drowning any outside noise, the man in the black mask slowly nodded up and down to confirm the answer. “I also know that although this money you are about to take will only provide short term relief to your predicament, it is in no way a solution to your problems, will you agree to that?” Dumbfounded, the man again nodded slowly up and down while shifting his weight continuously from his left to his right. Suddenly, he violently shook his head from side to side: “What the hell does any of that help, even if it is true?” As the shopkeeper slowly put down the money on the white, slightly age-stained counter as he answered the question. “You see, I was like you. Desperate. Life also pushed me to a point where I could no longer make ends meet and in my mind, my only option was to steal from those that could afford it. I was in almost the exact same situation as you are now, only that it wasn’t a shop but a small all-night gambling facility and there was a very pretty young lady behind the cash register. She alluded to the same thing I am about to offer you. I need an assistant for the shop and I think that you would be the perfect individual for the post. You definitely have courage and you are willing to make a plan to assist you with life, even if this plan is not a very good and sustainable one. I can show you how to turn that bravery into something that will elevate you from this desperate situation that you are in. All you have to do is put down the gun on the counter and then we can talk some more.” Confusion ran rife through the masked man’s mind. This was not supposed to happen. He played the scene out in his mind a hundred times and this was not part of it. He would have the upper hand and he would be the perpetrator with the authority to tell the man to give him the money. His weapon was all the authority he needed, now he was curious. Could there really be a light at the end of the tunnel?  Was this man for real? Did he really have a chance to turn his life around?  What would happened to his two children if he continued on this path? A million other questions seem to run through his mind in an instant. He knew these questions were there, but just like he knew the wind was real and could not see it, he knew that these questions could not be answered in that moment. Hope started dawning on a night of desperation. “Do you really mean it?” he asked with a trembling voice. “I really do…” came the reply accompanied by a sincere and honest smile.  Ever so cautious, the man lowered the gun slowly to the counter and gently placed it next to the money. A relief came over him like never before, the adrenal rush was slowly starting to fade and he let out a huge sigh. “To tell you the truth, I never wanted to stea…” The loud noise of the gun firing, drowned out the last part of the sentence and was the only sound he could hear. As the bullet penetrated his forehead right between the eyes, blowing out a massive hole in the back of the mask and his skull, his face froze with surprise as his lifeless body dropped to the ground. The merciless smile on the shopkeeper’s face was more sincere than any of his previous ones, unfortunately the man lying on the ground would never witness it…

A teacher that betrays your trust. A spouse that cheats on you. A business partner that stole from you. A friend that disappoints. A family member that hurts your feelings. Any of these could be the shopkeeper and life is full of disappointments. See them for the temporary events that they are and keep holding on to your own authority and essence, do not transfer it to an inanimate object that anyone can use against you. Life has essence. Treasure it.

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Lacking in essence

Lusting in fear

These individuals are always readily near.

Consuming with criticism

Manipulating with melancholy

They want to drag you down through their own folly.

Soothing with sinister subtleties

Spiting life by spitting strife

Their own arrogant illusions run rife.

Let knowledge be your cheer

Let reason be your steer

Love yourself, be your own.

Honor the choices that lead you home.

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To walk the slippery slope to salvation, preached by every corner in every nation.

This illusory route for the just and the fair, causes the masses to only have confusion and despair.

We get pushed by talkers that talk the talk yet we rarely see any of them who has walked the walk.

Eagerly listening and giving away our power, no more darkness as dawn starts rising during this final hour.

To kill heaven means to conquer hell.

To conquer hell means to let it within you dwell.

To preach from a book that you know well, where in all of this is your own experience, please do tell?

Your ego starts to grow and swell, this is one event that can never be saved by the bell.

To kill hell means to conquer heaven, it must rise within you, your unconditional thoughts are the leaven.

The light and the dark are always both our brethren.

To kill both heaven and hell,

will cause the final spiritual awakening to bell.

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Since the moment your clumsy little baby body waddled around the day we adopted you, we loved you. You were a friend, a companion and a very appreciative and loyal receiver of good snacks. We nurtured you with love when nature seemed to want to destroy you. Your soft demeanor and gentle nature made you invade the coldest of hearts with ease. Your acceptance of love was only outdone by the unconditional way that you shared it. With all the pain you must have endured and never shown, you taught us all that love is the only real analgesic. Your cage of blood, flesh and bone may be gone, but the love that you shared will forever live on in our hearts. I will fondly remember the joy when I rubbed your ears and the small sigh of approval that you were indeed savoring the bond that we shared. With delight I will look back upon your funny antics that made us smile and laugh. Rest well old friend and be at peace, within that peace I will find your memory, hold it and cherish it. May that memory fill this void.

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Courage (From Latin word cor meaning heart): Original definition when it first came into the English language was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart.

To be ourselves is probably one of the hardest things we can do. We have a fear of judgement that forms the underlay of our existence and seems to have a great deal of power. We think about what other people will say about us. We worry if they will approve or if they will accept us. We slowly start to forget ourselves. We slowly start to forget our story. We are the directors and the actors of our own stories. We should remember that.

Amazing that the story of essence can only ever be told by yourself because your vibrations emanating from your mouth synchronizes with your story and creates a harmonious flow that is felt by those around you and understood by every fibre of your being.

So take a minute, breath deep, let go of judgement and start opening up your story and share it!

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“Inch by inch, life’s a cinch, yard by yard, life is hard”

Greeting me like an indescribable enigmatic entity, the mountain stood in front of me. Looking up at its pure magnanimity made my head rush! Although using a word that describes a great mind does not seem apt in describing a mountain, it certainly describes it well. Magnanimity means that a mind refuses to be petty and is willing to face dangers. Looking at these awesome mountains, I could not help feeling that nothing that it faces on a daily basis could ever be labelled as dangerous. If there is a more noble purpose than just the sheer overwhelming presence to dissipate our own fears and fuel our understanding, then I still have to find one.

These mountains taught me a valuable thing. The mountain of life works the same. We all walk a narrow path, every now and again, we have to stop and take in the awe of life or the overwhelming journey that lies ahead. Sometimes we get tired and sometimes it feels like we want to give up. Other times we feel completely lost in the multi-directional pathways that life throw at us. The path may be slippery, rocky and sometimes smooth. We will ascend and eventually have to descent, we will be challenged and need to overcome some fears and obstacles.

Step by step and pace by pace  eventually leads us to the top, but as duality requires, we will have to come down again. One thing remains a truth, the mountain with all its splendor and beauty is with us every step of the way. We are never far from it.

May we all find our mountain and let it annul our self-doubt and enhance our understanding.

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Live in the dark? No! Live in the light!

We try to avoid pain with all our might.

Supposed experts say, stay positive, things will change.

The reality is actually more strange.

We grasp for knowledge of how to be, what to eat, how to live.

Science, logic and intelligence lead us to our conclusions, where we think we know what advice to give.

Fact is fact, a lie a lie, yet we are all still going to die.

Fantasizing about life with only the positive in mind, makes us weak and spiritually blind.

Our ego gets strengthened by gaining knowledge of that and knowledge of this.

Seldom we trade our knowledge for understanding and bliss, making us feel there is something amiss.

Murderer and savior, torturer and healer, rapist and protector, liar and saint.

Within all of us, if we seek deep enough, we will with these become acquaint.

All the human traits live in all of us, so let us not create such a big fuss.

Feeding our feeble, fading, fallible fantasy, will not create harmony on earth for you and me.

Comprehending and ascending this duality is all that this reality was ever meant to be.

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Absolute:  that which exists without being dependent on anything else

This life and universe of ours is as vast as the imagination can make it. Reality is amazing. Amazing is reality. When we decide that something is the way it should be according to our own beliefs and perceptions, we categorize that which we have no idea about. We make a thing exist without being dependent on anything else, like our ability to look at things from a variety of different angles. We can search for a bigger picture, we can allow ourselves to venture beyond the confinements of our own understanding and acknowledge that we do not understand.

Life consists of creation and destruction. We come and go, death is a thing we will all have to face. Birth is the same. Our ability to create a belief and stick to it, no matter what arguments are against it, hinders our growth. We need to establish some form of identity and we need to resonate with something that makes sense on this planet and in our daily lives. We also need to be strong enough to let it go and allow ourselves to become attached to non-attachment. Without the decay and destruction of limiting beliefs we cannot ever expect that there will be room for new growth. Then why is it that most of us love to hold onto the things we feel  comfortable with?

Survival is one of the key factors of life. Without survival instinct we will probably have died out long ago. We need to suffer to grow. Life does not favor the weak. This seems cruel and contradictory to the happiness and peace we all would like to strive for, but it is inevitable that we are going to experience disappointment, betrayal, hurt and negativity. Muscles do not grow without stimulation and a certain degree of discomfort. Brain function declines without the struggle of problem solving. Relationships dissipate without effort and work.

What do we need to sustain all of this?  Reason. We need reason to grow, reason to thrive, reason to commit to action and reason to sustain commitment. When the source of this reason is other than that which defines love for us, then it does not seem to be sustainable.

Absolutes are not based on love and understanding when they inhibit our growth and when our growth is constant and steady, there is no place for absolutes.

May we find the courage to step out of our thoughts and into our hearts and back again.

The title is also an absolute. Always remember that.

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Letting this anger rise from within while looking at your ignorant grin.

I do not care where you are from or to which race you think you belong.

I am aware that you are not your stare as your meaningless vibrations of speech fill the air.

These words do not mean much, because your body reveals the truth with every touch.

Although I know I am betraying myself, I am not letting my anger fall from the shelf.

It will permeate and grow until this volcano will blow.

Unfortunate that the time will not be right, so another might suffer the brunt of this might.

This betrayal of myself is a miserable thing. Frequently it seems to be happening.

Acknowledging the presence of this diabolical essence, is the only way to start.

I will not falter to preserve the love and understanding that resides in my heart.

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I asked her if she had ever experienced hypnosis before. She said it made her feel uncomfortable. I asked her why it made her feel uncomfortable and she explained what the ‘therapist’ told her:

“He told me to take off my top and cover myself with a towel before lying down on the massage bed. He proceeded to massage me, he said that this will help induce a deeper state of trance. It made me feel very uncomfortable”

There it was right there, the dark side of our industry. Now, some would argue that she could have said no and that she is a grown woman who should know better, but who really knows better when it comes to a hypnotherapy session? Definitely not the first time client who may already be a bit apprehensive toward the use of hypnosis.  It think it can be analogous to a child killing someone with a gun because the child did not have any info on how a gun works and what it actually can do. To say that the child should have known better, is ludicrous. From what I could gather from the info she provided, it seems like this ‘therapist’ gained her trust in the first session and then this incident took place in the second session. Of course the third never happened. From the stories I have heard from leaders in the field, this is not a uncommon abuse of an authoritative figure’s power. It happens in the industry. This occurrence does not just stain the hypnotherapeutic world, but across all disciplines we will find those with less than good intentions. It is important to acknowledge this without judgement.

Hypnosis works! There are many studies that one can Google that sides with the use of hypnosis. There are also many that says hypnosis is ineffective and one study even claims that hypnosis does not exist. If you are reading this then I have enough faith that you have sufficient computer literacy skills to search for these studies yourself. Hypnosis does not work for everyone. Neither is hypnosis the magical epitome of a therapeutic process. It requires a bigger understanding of life and the interaction of life to apply tools. Hypnosis is no different. There seems to be a misconception that, because we are in a therapeutic modality, it means that only this therapeutic modality is valid. It is a necessity for anyone who uses hypnosis as a therapeutic tool, to be absolutely 100% committed to their craft. This does not mean that we should negate or even belittle other therapists and their methods. The ego can be a tricky companion to have and makes a terrible master, but we need this ego to promote ourselves and our belief in hypnosis. Without our absolute conviction in what we do, we are already planting a seed of doubt in the ability or our amazing tool to grow and flourish amongst the thousands of people who need it.

So what do we say to ‘therapists’ who abuse their position?  Do we give them the cold shoulder?  Do we name and shame them?  Do we go on a vendetta against all who may bring the modality into disrepute? No, we inform the public and hone our skills to perfection. We apply these skills with empathy and professionalism. These ingredients should negate the dark side of the industry and eventually give very little breathing space to those that would think to use their skills for ominous purposes.

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