Morgan Bolt's Blog

I am pleased to announce that Cancer Just Is has been made available for pre-order through my publisher’s website! Just click here to check it out and order your copy today! Pre-orders will ship by mid-December, which works perfectly for those wishing to give it as a gift. This is a very exciting time for me, and I am beyond grateful to my publisher for working to have Cancer Just Is available on such a short timeline.

Well, it’s been a month already since we got “the scans.” In that time I haven’t felt I’ve gone downhill at all, but who knows if that’s reflective of what’s going on inside me. Something I learned early on in my time having cancer is that how you look doesn’t necessarily have any bearing on how you feel, and how you look and feel doesn’t necessarily relate to your actual state of health. So I’ll refrain from making any assumptions. It'd be nice if the Votrient was keeping things in check, but that's unlikely.
Since we got the news that my cancer started to grow exponentially and had spread more than ever before, we’ve enjoyed a wonderful cruise along the Rhine and a lovely week in Orlando with both our immediate families. We don’t really have much planned from here on out, but we’ll be visiting with friends and extended family as much as we can and see what other ways we can make the most of our remaining time together. I have a couple writing projects I’m looking at wrapping up and another publishing prospect in the works, which I’ll announce more about when I can. For now, we’ll keep doing the one thing we can: enjoying each moment for what it’s worth, in whatever ways we can.

Well, it’s been a month already since we got “the scans.” In that time I haven’t felt I’ve gone downhill at all, but who knows if that’s reflective of what’s going on inside me. Something I learned early on in my time having cancer is that how you look doesn’t necessarily have any bearing on how you feel, and how you look and feel doesn’t necessarily relate to your actual state of health. So I’ll refrain from making any assumptions. It'd be nice if the Votrient was keeping things in check, but that's unlikely.
Since we got the news that my cancer started to grow exponentially and had spread more than ever before, we’ve enjoyed a wonderful cruise along the Rhine and a lovely week in Orlando with both our immediate families. We don’t really have much planned from here on out, but we’ll be visiting with friends and extended family as much as we can and see what other ways we can make the most of our remaining time together. I have a couple writing projects I’m looking at wrapping up and another publishing prospect in the works, which I’ll announce more about when I can. For now, we’ll keep doing the one thing we can: enjoying each moment for what it’s worth, in whatever ways we can.

I’m getting published!
I am beyond thrilled to announce that my book ‘Cancer Just Is’ has found a publishing home with Smyth and Helwys, an independent Christian publisher based in Georgia. I don’t have a release date and it isn’t available for pre-order yet, but I will update here as soon as we figure out those details. Right now it’s in the copy-editing and cover design phase of things. I’m so grateful that this book will be published and that my ideas about cancer and God have a chance to reach a broader audience now.

This is long overdue and I apologize for the silence here. I don’t really have an explanation other than I wasn’t sure what to do with this blog, given the change in my circumstances that’s happened recently.
As you may have heard elsewhere, like Twitter or Facebook, I received the dreaded scan results I’ve always sort of known would one day come but kept on hoping wouldn’t until tomorrow or the day after. My cancer has begun to grow exponentially and has spread throughout my abdomen and chest, from my pelvis into my neck. It has also worked its way into my liver, which had always been free of disease before. Cancer does that sometimes. Mine has been very slow-growing until now. What had been a fairly well-managed, chronic condition is now a definitively terminal one, and I’m looking at weeks to months. With that news fresh in my mind I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with this space, hence the break in posts.
Christina and I decided to go on a bucket-list type trip to Europe, a continent neither of us had visited previously. Our trip last week was a wonderful and much-needed escape, and I cannot thank everyone who helped to fund our travels enough.
I also have some exciting developments happening in the book-publishing department, which I will share more about when I am able. Stay tuned!
As for cancer treatment, there’s really nothing left to try. We were never realistically looking at curative treatments anyways, but now it’s really down to hopefully slowing growth enough to buy a little more time than I’d otherwise get. I’m on Votrient again, which will turn my hair white but not much else by way of side-effects. For now I feel fairly well, so long as I have my digestive enzyme supplements with every meal.
I think that’s about all the news since my last post. I’ll post here some as I have reflections to share. I’ve got a couple half-finished drafts waiting for a little more time and attention before I share them here. That’s all I have to say!

                This most recent cycle of the immunotherapy clinical trial went a lot easier than the first two! I didn’t have a fever at all, and while my body temperature definitely elevated a little, it was only for an evening. All of the side-effects were greatly diminished, both in severity and duration, and a couple never materialized at all. I kept waiting for the figurative other shoe to drop but it never did. I’ll take it.
                We’re back home now and plan to be until the 19th, when I have my next set of scans. We’re hoping to ride some roller coasters and do a little camping and celebrate our birthday in the meantime. I’m also trying to exercise and stretch and whatever else I can do to recover some strength and hopefully not lose weight or maybe even gain a little.

No treatment today. Several levels of things like bilirubin and some enzymes and I’m not sure what all were high today, some extremely so. As such I have a hydration backpack overnight and we’ll try again in the morning. Hopefully I can get the next cycle of treatment soon!

We’re heading back into New York City tomorrow for round three of this clinical trial. Cycle two was far easier than the first go around, and I’m hoping that trend continues. We’re planning to stay in NYC about eight days or so, which will let me receive IV hydration as long as I need it. Hopefully that helps mitigate side-effects as well, which previously have included cold symptoms such as aches, a stuffy nose, and fever, along with a handful of other weird things like itching deep within my surgical scars. There’s a theory though that immunotherapy should include a lot of side-effects, because that means your immune system is doing something. We’ll find out in a few more weeks when I have my next scans if what it’s doing includes fighting cancer or just being annoying.
The last week or so at home has been a nice break from all the time we’ve been stuck in NYC lately. Last week my dad and I went to Canada’s Wonderland theme park near Toronto. It’s owned by the same parent company as Cedar Point and, as such, is included in my season pass. I didn’t feel as well as I was hoping but it was still a fun day and I got to ride Behemoth and Leviathan, a pair of roller coasters I’ve wanted to ride for a while. Then over the weekend Christina and I led our Youth Group’s end of summer overnight event, which included games, pizza, ice cream, a movie, and surprisingly exhausting laser tag—I’m still a bit sore from all the running. It’s been nice to have some normal life in between all the treatments, but I am glad to get back into New York City too. It’s like a second home, and I enjoy being there when I’m not stuck in the inpatient floor.

       With all my blood counts looking good this morning and me starting to feel better, we packed up and checked out of the Ronald McDonald house. This afternoon we took the usual shuttle bus to the airport in New Jersey, typically about a one-and-a-half hour ride. From there it's just a half hour fight (thanks Corporate Angel flight program!) back to Corning, NY, where we haven't been for over a week now--already a departure from our planned 4 nights in NYC.

       About 20 minutes from the airport we got a call from the hospital. One of my blood cultures came back positive for an infection. Since I have no symptoms we kind of assume it's just a contaminated culture but we have to play it safe so we're heading back to NYC right now. I'll be admitted at least for the night, and since I believe it takes 48 hours to fully grow everything from blood cultures I'm going to guess I'll be in the hospital that long as a minimum. We're pretty good by now at being flexible with our plans, but this was a little last-minute even for us.

       Something to pray for if that's your thing would be that it isn't actually an infection, or if it is that it gets resolved easily and quickly. I guess in general, that everything goes smoothly as possible and that we can go home sometime soon. Thanks!

       We're in New York City still. We had been planning to go home Friday, but after some weird liver-function numbers and the start of some of the same side-effects I had during the first cycle of this clinical trial, we and the doctors were all more comfortable with me staying close by. Staying in NYC also means I can continue to get IV hydration over the weekend, which seems to mitigate the side effects too.

       I hovered near a fever last night so they ran some blood cultures this morning just to be on the safe side, but fever and cold symptoms are all noted side-effects so it seems pretty clear that's all I'm experiencing. Which doesn't really make me feel that much better physically, but it definitely beats actually being sick and needing further treatment for something like a cold or flu!