Chris Akin's Blog - Posts Tagged "bereavement"
Radio Appearance
Hi All,
Just a quick note to let everyone know that I'll be beginning some radio promotion starting in January to promote the release of LITTLE VICTORIES: A TALE OF DIVORCEE, DEBAUCHERY AND FINDING HAPPINESS.
My first scheduled appearance is on the METAL ON METAL Radio Program on WJCU in Cleveland Heights, Ohio on Friday, January 10th at 8:30pm EST. Anyone can listen online at www.wjcu.org.
I'll post more as they come up. It's definitely an exciting time!!
Chris
Little Victories: A Tale Of Divorce Debauchery and Finding Happiness
Just a quick note to let everyone know that I'll be beginning some radio promotion starting in January to promote the release of LITTLE VICTORIES: A TALE OF DIVORCEE, DEBAUCHERY AND FINDING HAPPINESS.
My first scheduled appearance is on the METAL ON METAL Radio Program on WJCU in Cleveland Heights, Ohio on Friday, January 10th at 8:30pm EST. Anyone can listen online at www.wjcu.org.
I'll post more as they come up. It's definitely an exciting time!!
Chris
Little Victories: A Tale Of Divorce Debauchery and Finding Happiness
Merry Christmas
“When you're down on your knees, the whole world is counting / And you know it would please your enemies to count you out. / Reach down inside and find somehow / When you ask, is there someone out there who loves. / Somewhere out there who can. / Don't lose hope…/ If you have the spirit of love to carry the day, / The spirit of your love will show you the way. - The Firm - “Spirit Of Love”
Merry Christmas Everyone,
I hope everyone is off to a great start, and Santa brought everyone what they were hoping for. I woke up this morning (and yes, my gift was SLEEP), and the very first thing in my head was my father not being here for the first time this year. I looked on the book of faces, and I saw that my mom was already up, so I’m betting she’s there too. I started to call, but figured I would give it some space before calling. In that time, I continued to think about my dad, but started to think in the silly way that I tend to. We’ve all heard people say that so and so “is looking down watching and would be happy”. How does that work, exactly? Are they sitting on a chair leaning forward and looking down? Maybe they are laying on a floor that’s clear to where they can just see straight down? Is there a monitor of some sort mounted, where they can put their feet up on a couch or a chair and just watch it like an episode of the REAL HOUSESWIVES OF MY NEIGHBORHOOD? Do they need some sort of telescope or binoculars to see that far? It really is an interesting concept; this phrase is sort of silly but it’s intent is far less ridiculous when you think about it.
While I think this thought comes from people’s desire to not truly let go of a loved one, I think it hits a lot closer to home for me and my beliefs...especially in this first year since my dad passed away. In large part, the hope that someone “is looking down” is probably based on the reality that their spirit lives on. For so many, they need that spirit living on to be in the form of the living, breathing person which they knew. Not sure I’m all the way in with that, personally. As I’m sure my mom is doing, that spirit of my dad lives on with the memories of many Christmases and his ways of interacting. When I was a kid, Jason and I would open presents at 5am or whatever time we could get my dad and mom out of bed. From there, my mom would make a big breakfast that always had eggs that she made in a skillet that had to be 30 years old, as it was small, dented all out of shape and just looked like it had seen better days. Following would be their time to open presents - one on one, and ultimately where Jason and I would be busy with our own thing. At the time, it meant nothing, but looking back now, it was their way to have an intimate celebration of each other that was truly their own...even with the chaos of Jason and I yelling at each other while playing Odyssey2 games, ramming into each other in the small hallways of our house on our new big wheels, or whatever else we were doing. Maybe it’s my naivete, but that is the spirit I grew up with for Christmas. Looking now, as my dad is not here any longer for that kind of a moment, that does not snuff out the moment. The reason? The spirit of it - HIS spirit - lives on today. I’m not buying into the thought that my dad is positioned in some way to have a front row seat from some magical place to see what’s up here. I am believing that his spirit knows that his family is safe, happy, and filled with the same spirit of love that he simply did not take with him when he died.
It is no secret that I’m not a Christmas guy...at all, really. I’ve hated it since I’ve been an adult, and to be perfectly honest, I still do now. My reasoning has shifted though to where it’s more of an irritant than an absolute hatred. It irritates me that so much emphasis is put on this one day vs. EVERY day. Given that I’ve never been happy until this year, I guess that’s a shift. Still, I try to have that “Christmas spirit” every day these days, and not just on this one day. I try really hard to let the people I love know it now - often and honestly. I probably do it too much, to where lately I’ve been accused of being “mushy” (right, Stephanie? - :P). Still, I get the best feeling from the smallest things these days - a text from Emily, a late night phone call from Alex, an idea for a project from Jason, a random call from my mom because I’ve gone 3 days without communicating with her, an email from Jon where the profanity has a * in it so that it will somehow be acceptable from his work email, a random hug from Kyleigh, a real conversation with Mike or Zakk. It goes on and on. I live my life now feeling that spirit of love, so I don’t need to narrow it down to a single day to over-celebrate it I guess.
My dad is here today, and more importantly, he’s here every day. I feel it in the way my family has grown stronger since last year at this time when he got really sick. I feel it daily when I get any of the reminders I listed above, as well as a million other examples. I see that spirit. I feel it. I relish it.
Merry Christmas, everybody. I hope upon hope y’all feel the inner strength and warmth I’m feeling today, yesterday, tomorrow and beyond.
Peace,
Chris
Little Victories: A Tale Of Divorce Debauchery and Finding Happiness
Merry Christmas Everyone,
I hope everyone is off to a great start, and Santa brought everyone what they were hoping for. I woke up this morning (and yes, my gift was SLEEP), and the very first thing in my head was my father not being here for the first time this year. I looked on the book of faces, and I saw that my mom was already up, so I’m betting she’s there too. I started to call, but figured I would give it some space before calling. In that time, I continued to think about my dad, but started to think in the silly way that I tend to. We’ve all heard people say that so and so “is looking down watching and would be happy”. How does that work, exactly? Are they sitting on a chair leaning forward and looking down? Maybe they are laying on a floor that’s clear to where they can just see straight down? Is there a monitor of some sort mounted, where they can put their feet up on a couch or a chair and just watch it like an episode of the REAL HOUSESWIVES OF MY NEIGHBORHOOD? Do they need some sort of telescope or binoculars to see that far? It really is an interesting concept; this phrase is sort of silly but it’s intent is far less ridiculous when you think about it.
While I think this thought comes from people’s desire to not truly let go of a loved one, I think it hits a lot closer to home for me and my beliefs...especially in this first year since my dad passed away. In large part, the hope that someone “is looking down” is probably based on the reality that their spirit lives on. For so many, they need that spirit living on to be in the form of the living, breathing person which they knew. Not sure I’m all the way in with that, personally. As I’m sure my mom is doing, that spirit of my dad lives on with the memories of many Christmases and his ways of interacting. When I was a kid, Jason and I would open presents at 5am or whatever time we could get my dad and mom out of bed. From there, my mom would make a big breakfast that always had eggs that she made in a skillet that had to be 30 years old, as it was small, dented all out of shape and just looked like it had seen better days. Following would be their time to open presents - one on one, and ultimately where Jason and I would be busy with our own thing. At the time, it meant nothing, but looking back now, it was their way to have an intimate celebration of each other that was truly their own...even with the chaos of Jason and I yelling at each other while playing Odyssey2 games, ramming into each other in the small hallways of our house on our new big wheels, or whatever else we were doing. Maybe it’s my naivete, but that is the spirit I grew up with for Christmas. Looking now, as my dad is not here any longer for that kind of a moment, that does not snuff out the moment. The reason? The spirit of it - HIS spirit - lives on today. I’m not buying into the thought that my dad is positioned in some way to have a front row seat from some magical place to see what’s up here. I am believing that his spirit knows that his family is safe, happy, and filled with the same spirit of love that he simply did not take with him when he died.
It is no secret that I’m not a Christmas guy...at all, really. I’ve hated it since I’ve been an adult, and to be perfectly honest, I still do now. My reasoning has shifted though to where it’s more of an irritant than an absolute hatred. It irritates me that so much emphasis is put on this one day vs. EVERY day. Given that I’ve never been happy until this year, I guess that’s a shift. Still, I try to have that “Christmas spirit” every day these days, and not just on this one day. I try really hard to let the people I love know it now - often and honestly. I probably do it too much, to where lately I’ve been accused of being “mushy” (right, Stephanie? - :P). Still, I get the best feeling from the smallest things these days - a text from Emily, a late night phone call from Alex, an idea for a project from Jason, a random call from my mom because I’ve gone 3 days without communicating with her, an email from Jon where the profanity has a * in it so that it will somehow be acceptable from his work email, a random hug from Kyleigh, a real conversation with Mike or Zakk. It goes on and on. I live my life now feeling that spirit of love, so I don’t need to narrow it down to a single day to over-celebrate it I guess.
My dad is here today, and more importantly, he’s here every day. I feel it in the way my family has grown stronger since last year at this time when he got really sick. I feel it daily when I get any of the reminders I listed above, as well as a million other examples. I see that spirit. I feel it. I relish it.
Merry Christmas, everybody. I hope upon hope y’all feel the inner strength and warmth I’m feeling today, yesterday, tomorrow and beyond.
Peace,
Chris
Little Victories: A Tale Of Divorce Debauchery and Finding Happiness
Excitement Builds
Hi all,
It's an exciting time here in the world of Chris Akin Books! The book was released on December 23rd, and I can't believe the response so far. It's overwhelming to say the least. Definitely I'm thankful to all that have had any interest at all in LITTLE VICTORIES.
The ironic part is that none of the promotion has even started yet. I'm lining up some promotional opportunities for January now, but ultimately it's an "off" time for me. The Classic Metal Show is off for the holidays, as are many of the programs that will be helping me get the word out. It will be very interesting to see what comes off things when some actual promotion kicks up. Regardless, this thing has been far more successful than I could have ever imagined. I'm just a guy, and regardless of the fact that people know me from radio or writing or whatever, it's just surprising that people would have interest in reading my story of a very bad year. Still, I'll take it! :P
Moving into 2014, I'm just excited at all the opportunities that are being afforded to me. Be it the book, business or radio, there's a lot going on and I'm thankful for all of it. As the book says, I've divorced the old Chris Akin. Well...this new guy has a lot more opportunities.
I hope everyone has a great New Year's holiday. If you are bored and staying home, why not do so snuggled up on the couch reading LITTLE VICTORIES as the ball drops? :P
Peace everyone. Do something today to remind you that you are better than yesterday!
Rock,
Chris
It's an exciting time here in the world of Chris Akin Books! The book was released on December 23rd, and I can't believe the response so far. It's overwhelming to say the least. Definitely I'm thankful to all that have had any interest at all in LITTLE VICTORIES.
The ironic part is that none of the promotion has even started yet. I'm lining up some promotional opportunities for January now, but ultimately it's an "off" time for me. The Classic Metal Show is off for the holidays, as are many of the programs that will be helping me get the word out. It will be very interesting to see what comes off things when some actual promotion kicks up. Regardless, this thing has been far more successful than I could have ever imagined. I'm just a guy, and regardless of the fact that people know me from radio or writing or whatever, it's just surprising that people would have interest in reading my story of a very bad year. Still, I'll take it! :P
Moving into 2014, I'm just excited at all the opportunities that are being afforded to me. Be it the book, business or radio, there's a lot going on and I'm thankful for all of it. As the book says, I've divorced the old Chris Akin. Well...this new guy has a lot more opportunities.
I hope everyone has a great New Year's holiday. If you are bored and staying home, why not do so snuggled up on the couch reading LITTLE VICTORIES as the ball drops? :P
Peace everyone. Do something today to remind you that you are better than yesterday!
Rock,
Chris
Been Watching Law & Order For Days
Hey everyone,
It's Chris, just checking in. I've been really sick for the last few days with the flu. When I say "really sick", I mean it's been several days of laying in bed with nothing but me, my roku, and an endless supply of Law & Order reruns. I know that doesn't sound like a lot of fun, and trust me...it's not. That said though, it's always interesting to watch shows like Law & Order. By habit more than anything else, I am a "dialog" guy and a "crime" guy when it comes to what I like in video. That said, Law & Order is always a winner - especially the SVU series. I'm always amazed at the quality of writing on this show - specifically how they build in character development in every episode while only having a minute or two around the individual story of the current case. It's really solid stuff...at least in my eyes.
Taking that to my own writing, I do try to do the same thing. I have had several readers of LITTLE VICTORIES that have reached out on the website and stated that the book made them feel like they knew my friends. That's a major compliment to me. It's also one of those sticking points I had with the publisher before I decided to put it out myself. They wanted a more direct explanation of all my people, with pages and pages explaining the relationships. I just didn't want to do that. I like writing things a bit more subtly, with a hope that I'll do it well enough for people to understand who those folks are. The early feedback has been good. It's been just that.
For now, I'll keep on writing and continue to hone my craft. I've started a new book, and I'm hopeful it'll be better than the current one that you guys now have to read.
Peace everyone!
Chris
Chris Akin
Little Victories: A Tale Of Divorce Debauchery and Finding Happiness
It's Chris, just checking in. I've been really sick for the last few days with the flu. When I say "really sick", I mean it's been several days of laying in bed with nothing but me, my roku, and an endless supply of Law & Order reruns. I know that doesn't sound like a lot of fun, and trust me...it's not. That said though, it's always interesting to watch shows like Law & Order. By habit more than anything else, I am a "dialog" guy and a "crime" guy when it comes to what I like in video. That said, Law & Order is always a winner - especially the SVU series. I'm always amazed at the quality of writing on this show - specifically how they build in character development in every episode while only having a minute or two around the individual story of the current case. It's really solid stuff...at least in my eyes.
Taking that to my own writing, I do try to do the same thing. I have had several readers of LITTLE VICTORIES that have reached out on the website and stated that the book made them feel like they knew my friends. That's a major compliment to me. It's also one of those sticking points I had with the publisher before I decided to put it out myself. They wanted a more direct explanation of all my people, with pages and pages explaining the relationships. I just didn't want to do that. I like writing things a bit more subtly, with a hope that I'll do it well enough for people to understand who those folks are. The early feedback has been good. It's been just that.
For now, I'll keep on writing and continue to hone my craft. I've started a new book, and I'm hopeful it'll be better than the current one that you guys now have to read.
Peace everyone!
Chris
Chris Akin
Little Victories: A Tale Of Divorce Debauchery and Finding Happiness
The Business Of Being Me
I hope everyone is off and running today. Going to be cranking it up into overdrive once again today! I have lots of web work to do today, as well as several phone calls to make throughout the day. With that, one of those calls is of the fun variety, as I have to check in with legendary guitarist Michael Schenker of UFO and Michael Schenker Group fame today. Always fun to talk to Michael, as he's never really short of things to say and is always interesting. So the fun rolls on today.
Last night I spent a bit of time talking to a friend who experienced a close friend dying, quite literally, in her arms a couple of days ago. A year ago, I would never have been able to relate to that. Now though, after going through that with my dad, it just really brought back some very vivid memories. There's 2 chapters in LITTLE VICTORIES that deal with my father getting sick and ultimately dying; the two that I absolutely cannot read anymore and that hurt the absolute most to read. Still, it was interesting to give some perspective and be rewarded for it with some heartfelt appreciation for sharing what was, at it's core, one of the hardest things I've ever been a part of. As I wrote in the book, "how do you tell someone it's OK to stop existing?" It's so tough. Your emotions run wild, and in most cases, your selfish need for lack of change is your first instinct that leads to you telling someone, "fight on. You can overcome this." In most cases though, that's just not the case. I had a call with my dad before he died where we discussed him going to hospice, and it killed me to ask him if he was OK with us letting him die. It's just tough. Obviously it's toughest on the person that never comes back, but there's a huge mental stress that comes from surviving it. The best you can do on any given day though is make it through to tomorrow, and know that no matter what the outcome is, your intention was good. That's how I try to justify that time for me.
Alright kiddies...enough happy time writing from me. I really have to get to slaving. Be good, and make sure you end the day in a better place than you are right now!
Peace,
Little Victories: A Tale Of Divorce Debauchery and Finding Happiness
