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Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

Today I’m going to give you something different. Eight Questions with Eight Detailed answers on some of the top things people email or DM me about. Please read to the end. I'm sure something you're going through will be addressed, and question 8 will shock you...

Question 1: The Core Misunderstanding Between Men & Women

G.L. I'm so sick and tired of getting my hopes up only to be disappointed. My twin sister just celebrated 3 years of marriage, her husband provides, they own two homes, travel, and I'm stuck watching their dog because every man I meet says I'm great, then walks away.

I've been cheated on. I've been ghosted. I've been told "It's not the right time" twice. If I'm the problem, how do I fix it? How do I better understand what men actually want and become that woman?

There are men who ain't shit... then there are women who keep choosing those ain't shit men. Not because they're stupid, not because they look like easy victims, but because mentally, those women don't understand men. "I like him a lot... damn, I think this is love" turns into "Damn... how could I be so dumb," because you don't know how to play the love game properly.

I don't care if you're a woman raised with brothers: You don't know how men think. I don't care if you're Megan Thee Stallion, who writes songs about lying ass men: You don't know how men think. When you don't educate yourself on the mind of a man, how to discern real from fake, then you will continue to choose the wrong men. Men lie. Men lose interest. Men are greedy for different women. But men are also capable of not giving into fuck boy behavior if he's presented with the right woman who puts his ass in CHECK.

Tell a man what you've been through in the past, and he'll hold your hand, promise you the world, then use that information to break you down. It's not about sex, it's about control. Stop seeing these men as your "friends" and recognize that the best defense is offense. Make them chase. Make them invest. Make them pour so much equity into you that they can't victimize you because you've gotten way more than you've put in. That's called leverage, ladies. There are levels to power, and your first lesson starts now:

Women believe: “If he’s showing interest, he must be serious… or getting there.”

But the reality is: Men can show consistent attention without any intention of building a relationship.

To most men, attention is cheap. But for too many women, attention feels like a promise. "Why would he spend so much time with me or say all these things if he doesn't see me as serious?" That's how we as males operate; you can't be flattered because the same way he's in your face, he was in another girl's face last year. It's the same exact playbook, not proof of a soul tie.

1. Consistency = Commitment (it doesn’t)

“We talk every day… but I don’t know where I stand.”

He texts, calls, hangs out… but avoids defining anything.

You interpret frequency as emotional depth. You fail to recognize that he’s just comfortable, not committed.

2. Chemistry = Intent (it really doesn’t)

“We have such a strong connection… why isn’t he stepping up?”

"He says I'm different from his exes... but why aren't things escalating?"

You think the feeling is mutual, based on a vibe and hollow praise. You're failing to realize that for him, it’s just an experience. Men live in the moment. Every new girl is "The best". Every high is "better than my ex" because he's caught up in the novelty. In reality, his words don't hold water, he's just caught up in the moment. But you're the kind of woman who loves to be compared to other women, to feel superior, to feel like you're special. This ego is why you buy into the weak words and love bombing actions of iconsistent men.

3. Potential = Reality (the classic trap)

“I see who he could be if he just focus or didn't have all these distractions”

"Things will go back to how they were during the honeymoon phase. I just need to stick it out."

You're dating the projection; you're in love with the mask; you're convinced that his hot-and-cold nature can be fixed. In reality, men know how to turn on the charm when motivated. They can be damn near perfect when a girl is "new pussy" or when they get in trouble, they can apologize and be sweet again. But that's not who he is, he can't live up to that potential because it's an act, not who he is at the core.

4. Effort in moments = Overall investment (nope)

Big dates, intense nights, emotional conversations…

Public displays online or offline that claim you as his...

These things numb your common sense by putting makeup on a pig. The highs are hitting a level where you ignore the gaps in his behavior, sweep the inconsistencies under the rug, and avoid the lingering issuesyour intuition is pointing out. "But we have such a strong connection... he's doing things other men don't do... it has to be real, right?" Fuck the dates, fuck the Instagram posts, and look at the one-on-one behavior. If the effort is 10 followed by 2, 3, 2, then the sum of his effort is low as fuck! He's playing you!

5. “He hasn’t decided yet” (he usually has)

“Maybe he just needs more time…”

"He says, that he has to take care of a few things and then we can be together..."

Most men know early what category a woman is in. Time doesn’t change his mind. He knew from the end of your first conversation where you would end up in his life. Men operate from a place of classification, not falling in love slowly. Very early on, a man generally places a woman into one of these buckets:

casual / fun

situational / convenient

relationship / long-term

And here’s the part women resist: If a man wants you for real, his behavior becomes unmistakably clear and he always moves in the direction of a long-term relationship. Men who are serious about you are clear, consistent, and they keep moving upward, fast, determined, and competitive. There is no dragging his feet. There is no "wait until," and no obstacle stands in his way. He has to have you, and will move mountains to get you, not sexually, but as his committed woman.

Why Women Keep Missing This Fact...

Too many women filter male behavior through female attraction patterns:

Women grow into feelings → so they assume men do too

Women attach through consistency → so they value time spent

Women see potential → so they invest early

Think about all the love stories that include a woman saying, "I didn't like him at first, but he grew on me, and I fell in love." MEN RARELY DO THAT KIND OF SHIT. Women don't grow on us; it's either all in Gamechanger or "this bitch is a placeholder until I can do better".

You are a woman, so you THINK like a woman, and historically, women have allowed for growth and evolution, so your logic becomes: If I just give this more time, it’ll become something deeper.

But with men: Time without escalation = confirmation, not progress.

If you have to interpret his behavior, ask others what they think, or do any kind of mental gymnastics, then you're avoiding the truth: That Man Doesn't Want You. Love is simple. Any person who has shown you complications, given endless excuses, or pointed to someone else's struggle as a reason to stick around is a liar. If he wants you, he makes it happen.

Instead of:

“Why is he like this?”

“How do I get him to step up?”

The real question is, based on his current behavior, what has he already decided?

He doesn't want you because you gave away ALL of your power too fast. You fucked him quick. You spent too much time with him. You let your guard down too early. Why? Because you date with hope instead of dating with strategy.

Strategy dictates that you reserve your pussy until he's invested time, energy, and money. Strategy demands that you don't center your world around one man, you stay busy, you see him on your terms, and you don't be too available. Strategy means that you don't over-share, you don't let your emotions show, and that you play poker and make him reveal his true nature long before you talk about your history.

When you play this kind of offense, men are the ones that are left vulnerable. He's spent money, he always wants to see you, he's told you his story, he's admited his fears, and you've done nothing but play along. He's your mark. He's your pawn. You're the Queen controlling the chess board.

If you can't do that, if you can't date strategically, then go back and read my books. Or if you're not confident enough to do those things, then maybe my answer to this next question will help you...

Question 2

I'm in my early 30s and it's not that I don’t want a man on an equal or greater level than me, but where I live the options for established men are very limited. Can it be called settling when you have no choice? Please break down the following, G.L.: How do you find quality men? Where do you go to meet quality men? What do you say to quality men to STAND OUT?

Answer:

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Thanks for reading STOP CHOOSING THE WRONG MEN – 8 Part Gameplan To Manifest Better Relationships

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

You two are going to get married. You're testing out his last name with your first name to see if it fits. You're smiling every time the phone vibrates because you think it's him. You don't want to get your hopes up logically, but it feels like real love. My man my man my man... looking ass.

Is it because the dick's good? Is it because this man is teaching you new things? Is it because you finally feel secure? Is it because this man checks all the boxes you've been craving since you were a teenager?

Or is it all delusion?

Answer: It's a mixture of all of that.

Modern relationships move fast. Just vibing turns into being up under each other every weekend. Sex. Promises. Soul Ties. Then, a few months later, your texts are being ignored, and "busy" is the excuse they use to slowly break away from you. It felt like love, but it wasn't. That's the price you pay when you don't take your time in the Honeymoon stage.

How Long Does the Honeymoon Phase Last?

For women in their mid to late 20's, the honeymoon phase in a relationship usually lasts between 3 to 18 months. For women in their 35+, it's usually shorter, 2 to 9 months, because those women tend to date older men who move faster, which means their "nice guy mask" comes off sooner, or their "Nah, I can do better" ego arrives sooner.

First Stage of the Honeymoon Phase: Damn, I can't believe I finally found someone who gets me.

Second Stage of the Honeymoon Phase: Wow, even though we went through our first argument or rough patch, he still feels like the one.

Final Stage of the Honeymoon Phase: All of our cards are on the tables, and we've seen each other at our best and at our worst.

If it's just sex, men pull back during that first stage: I've hit. I was good. I hit a few more times. The lust is gone. Now I realize I'm not that into her personality or her lifestyle.

If there is an emotional disconnect, this usually happens during that second stage. A man thinks like this: It's not about sex, it's about finding someone who gets me. While this woman and I have things in common, the deeper things I need to see in a wife —Temperament. Excitement. Balance between knowing how to show me love and knowing how to give me space... is NOT there.

You Two Aren't Going To Last...

The reason most of your relationships end at the end of the honeymoon stage instead of pushing on into real love isn't as complex as you think. No matter if it's 3 months or 18 months. If you hit that Final Stage and this man finds out that who you are has been a lie, he walks away. Or he self-sabotages the relationship and forces you to break up first.

He stops being consistent. He swears nothing is wrong, it's just that work is stressful, family or other things are on his mind. But... he's still out hanging with his friends or making time for things he wants to do. Everyone repeats the same relationship advice: "Girl, you deserve better." You give a few more chances, but nothing changes. You do what all the relationship videos say and walk away rather than be a second option.

...walking away isn't easy. You choose you, but secretly you want him to come running back. So why isn't he fighting to get you back? Is he going to let go of what you had that easily? YES! It was his plan all along. Men pull this mindfuck all the time: Stop treating a girl like she's your girlfriend, and hopefully she gets the hint and leaves you the fuck alone so you don't have to have the messy talk about breaking up or explain why you don't want her anymore. That's the self-sabotage game: Bitch I don't want you, but I can't say that, so pick up on the vibe.

Not every man is an asshole. Most of them are legitimately looking for a deep commitment. The end goal is marriage and a family. You say you're the kind of woman men should want to marry, but do you SHOW it during the Honeymoon Phase?

"He doesn't know I'm crazy... yet." Is a joke one of my friends used to make. In the years I've known her, her relationships never last more than a year, and they never get past the honeymoon phase. Why? Because it wasn't a joke. There literally is something going on with her mentally that these men don't know yet. They see this pretty woman with a high-paying job, and are like "BRO, I can't believe she's still single." But over the months, the truth comes out. Most women are dealing with baggage that they're too afraid to talk about or to heal. That list includes:

Daddy Issues that you havent' dealt with

Heartbreak that hasn't been healed

Overcompensating to be loved

Becoming clingy and centering your world around a man

Abuse or Sexual trauma that you still can't open up about

Being a doormat because you don't want a man to leave you

Once a man sees these signs during the Honeymoon phase he realizes instantly that you're not "wifey". You're too broken, too weak, or simply not the kind of woman he can love and respect.

"But G.L., what about guys who meet other women and throw everything away?"

Other women are not your problem during the Honeymoon Phase. Other women only become obsessions when a man begins to see the flaws in the woman he's with. The Honeymoon stage is filled with infatuation; it's a dopamine high and an emotional rollercoaster. Other women can only disrupt that AFTER those things begin to fade.

The problem is, why do your relationships fade? Why aren't you enough? And how to get to the point where you can survive the honeymoon phase and have it transition into true love, so you can choose partners who don’t just excite you at the start, but actually fit into the life you’re building.

Today's First Podcast Question

On today's podcast, we break down the question above and everything you ever wanted to know about the world of dating. As always if you have a question for me to answer on the show, email WBRStory@gmail.com

Press Play Below To Listen To The Show

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Thanks for reading How Long Does the Honeymoon Phase Last?

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

Men don’t fear commitment… they fear committing to the wrong woman.

There are men who want marriage, and they move genuinely. Then there are men who want pussy, and they move wearing a loose mask. Most of you can spot the pussy hunter, but you're not prepared for the guy who was a good dude, who did want a family, who was respectful... but who still fucks you over because his feelings changed 4-12 months later. The liar is the guy who makes you smarter when it comes to dating, but Mr. Not The One. Is the reason most of you need therapy.

The Game: Men test you, to see if you're like the rest. The irony is that I've talked to thousands of women since I started this site, I've heard all the stories, and the one thing women need to understand is that there are more of you who ARE "just like the rest" than there are Unicorns. My job is to change that. I don't care if it's Ho Tactics or Date Like A Spartan; the agenda is to hold a mirror up to your face and say, "Stop being basic before it's too late!"

What do men really want when it comes to dating, and how do you bottle that up, become what they need and fast tract that to a serious committed relationship? The answer is much simpler than you think.

Men want peace.

Men want to be heard.

Men want to be respected.

Men want to have fun... this last one will be the key.

Most relationships never get off the ground or crash hard because it's all fun in the beginning. You go on dates, you listen to his ideas, philosophies, and general life story. You flirt, tease, and it's all a good time. He likes you because dating you is EASY. Then... the pressure comes into play. If he's not moving in the way you want or are used to, you get annoyed, attitude comes in, small arguments lead to passive-aggressive behavior, or full-blown arguments.

A woman once told me, "If men want peace, then they should stop doing dumb shit." And that's the catch-22, is he doing dumb shit or is he just not doing things YOUR WAY? In a man's mind, "a good woman" isn't the same as having a new mother. The moment a man feels you're trying to boss him around or change him, no matter if it's during the dating stage or in the relationship stage, he's going to find a way OUT.

You're not respecting him; you're telling him what to do. You're not his peace; you're annoying. You don't listen to him anymore, you hear what you want to hear, and jump to conclusions. And you're not fun, you're mean, boring, and not even good pussy is worth the headache you've become... 80% of you reading this fit into this category.

There are weak Beta men who need motherly women to fix them, lead them, and wipe their ass. Then there are Alpha men who will fall back the moment you pull that shit. Alphas have become successful by being dominant, not submissive. They negotiate, but unlike a Beta, they can't be led. The problem is, the men most of you are attracted to have Alpha energy, and you don't understand why they don't want you. Allow me to break it down.

How We Think As Men: Don't pressure me to do more, I want to do more on my own to show you how I feel. Don't rush me for a relationship, don't correct my mistakes, don't talk negative about my friends or family. Don't smother me with your attention or affection, too much makes me uncomfortable. Don't expect me to read your mind, and don't get mad because I'm not telling you everything that's on my mind. Don't see my silence as a problme. Don't see my distance as proof that I'm after another woman. Don't put words in my mouth, don't fight my battles, and never accuse without a conversation.

Too many of you ladies have been raised to "chase love" instead of allowing love to find you. Those Disney movies, bullshit romance novels, and basic bitch reality competitions have brainwashed you, where you think in order to be truly loved, you need to earn a man's heart by going above and beyond. This miseducation has a generation of women out here trying to Girl Boss themselves into marriage, tap dancing for dick, only to end up alone because we as men know that's the opposite of what we need.

Relationships don't need constant stimulation or course correction to work. Trying to overcompensate by mothering a man, nagging him, or being clingy isn't "love," it's an insecurity inside of you that reveals a scary secret: I'm not good enough, so I have to make sure to bring something to the table for him to keep from leaving.

Unemployed men need fixing. Alcoholics need fixing. That guy who isn't using his degree and playing Call of Duty all day needs fixing. Guys who are actually winning, the dudes you could build an empire with, don't need you to save them. But you can't help yourself from, you STILL do too much, and that's why they pass you up in favor of the next woman.

Understand that genuine love doesn't require work. It blooms without being extra. That's the true meaning of unconditional. But you continue to overwater the garden because you have this imposter syndrome, which makes you feel undeserving. It's time to recognize that you don't have to do the most to receive the bare minimum.

Modern dating has become about fixing each other, reassuring each other, learning love languages, holding space, and all this new-age bullshit that only serves to confuse the nervous system. It's time to learn how to receive love without pushing people away. You are enough, you've just forgotten how to live in that kind of power... Let's get you back on track.

Why Men Play Games With You

A man marries a 24 year old woman... "he just wants to control her because she's young and dumb"

A man marries a 34-year-old casino waitress... "he just wants to control her because she's pretty and dumb."

"This Baddie culture needs to end, and real women need to make a comeback..." shut up, Basica. These ratchet baddies are fun, you, your degree, and your elitist attitude are boring as fuck.

The reality is, men choose women who are fun, sexy, no pressure, and chill as fuck. Women who look out by being considerate, not those who think they're helping by being bossy. Most of you aren't a good time unless you're naked. A few months into dating, you stop being fun and exciting because your emotions come into play. Anxiety, overthinking, trying to solve problems that aren't there, or shutting down the moment you feel like you won't get what you want: These are signs that you're mentally stunted and emotionally damaged.

Healing isn't going to therapy. Healing isn't reading a book. Healing isn't being celibate. Healing is looking at your past or current relationship and recognizing the patterns. So you can become the kind of woman who exudes the energy and attitude that men chase...

Here's a portion of an email someone sent in to my podcast...

“I was with a man for 8 months, and after he didn’t get me anything for my birthday or see me my birthday weekend, I confronted him. Why did this clown text me that he had met someone new and didn’t want to ruin my week by breaking the news. I went to his house, cursed him out, but ended up having sex with him. For the past three weeks I’ve seen him twice to talk, but we ended up fucking each time. After reading your book, I now know it’s not about him or this new girlfriend. It’s about me. I’m sick to my stomach that a guy could date me for so long, not give me a title and commit to another woman under my nose. I’ve sunken so low G. My only flex is being able to fuck another girl’s so-called man, a man that told me in actions and in words that I was never good enough for him…”

The reality of modern dating is that a man will be everything you want for 8 months and choose another girl. Sure he'll still fuck you, because the flesh is weak, but what is his rejection saying?

The guy you're with will one day do this to you. The next guy you swipe on a dating app will one day do this to you. This woman's story isn't out of the ordinary, she's no different than most of you reading these words. And like her, I'm going to show you how to truly heal and find love, not a time waster.

PART 1: AVOIDING THE MALE MIND FUCK

Dick Tactics, the male version of Ho Tactics, are easy to spot if you...

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Thanks for reading What Do Men Really Want When It Comes To Dating & Relationships

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

Wealthy, smart, or handsome men don't stay on the market for long. As a woman you're going to meet guys who are involved and think "if only he were single, he would be perfect". Let's be real as fuck. Some of you aren't waiting around for a breakup, you see an opportunity and you're going to take it. Let's not front like Porsha from Real Housewives of Atlanta is the only woman that doesn't mind shopping for a husband while he still has a ring on his finger or that these men aren't constantly shopping for something better. We all know that you can't TAKE a man. Males will always thirst after new women when they're not content, and if you know how to position yourself the right way there are very few men YOU can't have. I'm not talking about being a side ho, those chicks don't play this game on a high level. I'm talking about seducing him, replacing his woman, and coming away with everything he has! I received an email from a woman who likes a guy who has a girlfriend. Her question was “would it be right to try and talk to him anyway”? Why the hell not? You don't owe a woman who isn't your friend or family member any loyalty. She can't keep him, so if it's not you, it will be someone else. Women need to think about SELF more often and not the feelings of some dry pussy Basica. If you find a guy who has everything you're looking for and the only thing standing in the way is another chick—fuck her.   I know… karma, morals, he cheated on her he’ll do the same thing to you blah blah blah. You know who says that— scared bitches . It’s survival of the fittest, if his girl isn’t strong enough to keep a hold on him, then that’s her fault.  I'm not talking about adultery; I'm talking about Boyfriend/Girlfriend. Those titles are only as strong as you make them, and if dude wants to stray then obviously he wasn’t in love. Does leaving her to be with you make him a bad man? Not necessarily. The man who you may end up with is probably currently with someone else. Statistically speaking, a man gets better at relationships the older he gets, so instead of crying about not finding a man or swiping on dating apps going through men other women don't want, let's break down how to seduce a man to you. The first step is to check your "sister code" at the door.  Every time a celebrity couple breaks up the scorned woman cries about how bad the man was, yet the new woman is like "he's the best friend I never had, he treats me like a princess". So who is telling the truth? Think about this: your Ex is out there treating a new woman 10x better than he ever treated you. One person’s “bad man” can always turn into someone’s “Mr. Perfect”. “If she was all that then you wouldn’t be cheating, if my pussy wasn’t good then you wouldn’t be eating”    How To Take Her Man  If you don’t have the heart to take another girl’s boyfriend, cool—STOP READING NOW… I mean it; this will only offend your sense of moral decency… "this is horrible, what's wrong with the world, he'll just do the same to you blah blah fucking blah" if you're scared go to church! but... If you’re a fucking Spartan and you have no problem kicking a bitch in the chest then watching her fall into a pit, then continue on!  When you meet Mr. Right and it’s revealed that he has a girlfriend, you don’t shy away from that. You embrace it. The last thing you want to be is a side chick who keeps quiet and allows a man to lead her on. Spartans observe, plan, and execute, always staying a step ahead. Ask about his girl, how they met, where they go on dates... talking to a guy with a chick about his relationship is the ultimate market research. The goal is not to fuck a guy with a girlfriend—that’s easy. Your job is to evaluate the guy with a girlfriend to see if he’s the right man for you, then erase her from his life.  Show Him You're Better: When you're talking to a guy who has a girlfriend, you have to play along for the first few weeks. Text, call, or DM him on his schedule. Give him that exciting feeling of a "secret love" and use this time to do the research listed above. Don't make it into a negative or use words like, "you need someone better". You simply ask questions and let him vent about all the things he doesn't do. Men lie! I repeat these motherfuckers lie! They will say they're having relationship problems but really aren't because they want sympathy and know that women love to "save" men from basic bitches. Assume that anything he says about her may be false at first, and get around this by simply allowing him a release, this establishes trust in you.   Bait Him: The next wave is flirting. Don't start off with sexting because you paint yourself as just another "new pussy". Expose his male lust slowly.

The power isn't sex, it's positioning yourself as better than his girlfriend, but making sure he respects you enough to gain his trust. Any man can cheat. Your goal is to make him fall in love before he ever even eats your pussy. You do this by teasing and...

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Thanks for reading How To Take Another Girl’s Man – Step By Step Strategy

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

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What is a situationship, and how do you turn it into a real relationship? A situationship is a romantic connection without clear commitment, where you act like a couple but leave out the labels, consistency, or long-term direction. Many women find themselves stuck in situationships wondering why a guy won’t commit, what the signs mean, and how to upgrade the connection into something serious.

It’s not your looks. It’s not because you were tricked. AND despite what a man tells you, it’s not because “he’s not ready for something serious.” Situationships are mostly born out of a mutual decision to go with the flow… maybe you don’t want anything deep after your last breakup or maybe you only wanted sex and companionship. Regardless of the “how” 90% of the women who I’ve talked to who ended up in a situationship regretted them.

“We’re building… let’s see where it goes… I have a lot of things on my plate…” Is an excuse, and if you’ve ever been so silly over dick that you accepted those excuses and STILL had sex, then you need to finish this entire article!

Casual sex isn’t “adult and edgy,” it’s demeaning. Being traumatized and calling it “savage” or “dating like a man” isn’t cool; it’s proof that you need healing.

You are too special, too amazing, and too smart to AirBnB your pussy in the name of “we’re just friends, it’s nothing serious.” I’ve been doing this long enough to know that NO SELF-RESPECTING WOMAN wants to be in a situationship. They choose this path because they want to safely have companionship without the fear of being hurt again. Trust me… that person you’re giving your prized possession to will always have the power to hurt you, and it’s only a matter of time before they embarrass and humiliate you, label or not.

Women fought to gain so many rights in the 20th century, only to see 21st-century women turn right around and give up one of their most important rights: The ability to demand an exclusive relationship.

If a man tells you he doesn’t want anything serious or acts as if he doesn’t want anything serious, then you follow his lead and fit into the box he wants to put you in. He doesn’t want a traditional relationship; you do, but you can’t look thirsty, so you pretend to be cool with being unofficial while still giving this man all the official benefits. Huh??? Who raised you to be that idiotic?

I always hear Basicas say, “I didn’t want anything serious either at first, but my feelings changed, now I do want a relationship with him.”

OMG, you mean to tell me three months of spending every day talking to a person, texting, and fucking resulted in deep romantic feelings!? No, that’s impossible, how can that be when you said that wasn’t what you wanted??? Because Science, dumb ass!

Of course you were going to catch feelings despite what your mouth was saying, the problem is that we as men don’t feel the same way about you no matter how many times we tell you we love your or how often we pipe you down. He told you that you were special or different from other girls–HA! If he meant that he would make you his girl, he hasn’t for a reason! He’s still dating around, don’t think he’s not!

A situationship is the best way for a man to get girlfriend benefits from a girl he isn’t sure about. Being exclusive to a man who is still shopping around for a BETTER WOMAN makes you a Placeholder, not a Game Changer, and you need to value yourself enough to understand that you are NOT an exception to the rule who will one day change his mind!

Click Here For Previous Article: “Are You Wifey or Pussy” What Is A Situationship?

A situationship is a relationship without a label where two people are more than platonic friends, but haven’t committed to being anything official for various reasons.

What’s the difference between a situationship and just taking it slow with someone you want to eventually commit to? Treatment. Choice. Time Elapsed.

A man who Treats you like a girlfriend, fucks you like a girlfriend, but doesn’t want to give you the title or commit to anything serious has no excuse for not committing. He’s using the lack of a label as a loophole so he can exit whenever he wants.

A Situationship is like someone saying they don’t have a job because they don’t want to pay the IRS… but they wake up at 8am, got to the mall, pull an 8 hour shift, and collect a check at the end of the week. The IRS would call him out like, “You just put 40hours in, you’re employed, pay up!” Weak women don’t call men out on this contradiction, they will let a dude call a duck a horse, and just nod their head because they don’t want to lose the relationship they’re in even if it’s a sham.

Who made the Choice that your relationship is To be determined? Most likely it was the man. He moved in silence, courted you as if he wanted something more, fucked you, and after the 2nd time he put his hand in the cookie jar, you asked, “So what are we?” Like most men who wanted to lease and not buy, he replied, “We’ll figure that out later, let’s not ruin this” and you accepted that.

A man who makes the Choice for you that you should be in a “wait and see” exclusive but unofficial relationship isn’t a “fuck boy,” he’s a BOSS because he just told you what it’s going to be and you took those orders like a worker. If it’s your Choice to be “friends” and not make things serious, then you’re in control… but only if you MEAN it. Most of the women before when they come out and say they want love.

Finally we have Time Elapsed. I’m going to say this for the last time, and I don’t care what basic bitch rational you use to try and deny this because I don’t believe, I know this is true—If you’ve dated, talked to, or have been fucking a man for more than 7 weeks and he hasn’t tried to snatch you up—you’re not taking it slow, you’re in a situationship. You’re a Placeholder, a Hobby, a Temporary Pussy while he scouts for a Permanent Wifey. The greatest lie the devil ever told was, “I don’t know what I want.” All men know what they want!

They may not be able to write it down or express it verbally, but all men speak with actions. If all I am willing to do is chill and fuck you, I don’t want you. If I chill, fuck you, and handcuff myself to you as my woman, I want you. How hard is that to comprehend? Most women get the first two and act as if they’re winning and become content. Why be loyal to the potential of a man becoming something more in the future when you can Spartan Up and get a man that wants more right now? There’s a difference between being a Teairra Mari and being a Beyoncé Carter, it’s called self-respect.

What does a man mean when he says, “I’m not ready for a relationship” or “I’m not looking for anything serious” It means he left off the words, “With You!”

He doesn’t want to slow down or be handcuffed because you aren’t who he pictured being handcuffed to. The fact that he is telling you that he doesn’t want anything serious OR accepting the fact that you told him you weren’t ready for anything serious, means that he doesn’t think you’re special. I get it, he says all the right things, he looks out for you, he pays for dates, and his mother loves you, but none of that matters if he’s not willing to go all in emotionally and claim you.

If you looked and acted the way that he wanted, that dude would move a fucking mountain to lock you down. If you talked in a way that inspired him, he would ignore your demand of “I don’t want a boyfriend” and say, “I don’t care. You are mine, and I’m going to do everything to change your mind.”

I don’t care if you talk every day… that’s not your man.

I don’t care if you went on a vacation… that’s not your man.

You are an option for him, NOT a priority. No matter how you try to justify being in a situationship, the reality is that you’re renting a dick and keeping a seat warm for another woman who will get everything from the same man, while you end up with nothing to show for this relationship.

We as men know what special looks like, and we will quickly commit to a woman because rare doesn’t come around often. Kings go to war for Queens; they don’t wait around for some other man to snatch her up. You don’t have a King that will die for you; you have a guy you talk to. Difference. You’re not yet a Queen that demands respect, you’re a bitch that accepts Come Over & Chill dates. Difference. When a man wants a woman, there is no hesitation, no excuses, no wrong time, no long distance, and no financial limitations that will keep him from scooping up something he sees as special.

Men do not leave quality women out in the streets where other men can date them and snatch them up. Therefore, if a man is fixing his mouth to tell you he’s Not Sure or playing his position while your scared ass pretends that you don’t want love, then he doesn’t fuck with you. Facts!

Rules of a Situationship

You Can’t Demand Shit: You can ask, you can suggest, you can get passive aggressive and drop hints, but he knows that he isn’t your man and can’t be held up to relationship standards. You will be constantly frustrated, but in the end you will have to swallow your emotions because you allowed yourself to be suckered into this exploitive powerless type of relationship.

You Aren’t Going To Be Upgraded: Bae, let’s take it slow. Bae, you know I’m focused on this money. Bae, give me a month. The word of the day is “Naive”. You will wait… wait some more… and then read some basic ass internet fact about how all of these celebrities waited too. Lies help you sleep, but eventually you have to wake up, and when you do you’ll be back to waiting for a man that doesn’t want you.

You Will Share Dick: You aren’t going to sleep with anyone else during this fake relationship, and that’s noble, but you’re still going to have multiple partners because the man you’re waiting for is still sampling other vaginas. You are default pussy, not trophy pussy, so when you get those calls at 3am, it’s only because the bad bitches clowned him and sent him back to you. You’re not good enough to make him curve his appetite for thot box, and never will be.

He Will Still Lie: You thought this would make you two friends who openly share everything. Ha! Men know that women are jealous, so unless you’re bisexual and helping him bed other women, he’s going to tell you what you want to hear as opposed to the truth because he knows that you still really want to be with him. Knowing that he’s actively hunting someone else will hurt you, so lies are mandatory.

The Word “Love” Will Lose All Meaning: You will hear, “I love you.” More than you’ve heard in your real relationship. What man doesn’t love cheap pussy? Real love comes equipped with actions that prove it, the fact that he can’t even make it official tells you all you need to know about his kind of love.

The Situationship Trap

The Basic Bitch Situationship: Here you are, Miss Typical, who thinks she’s Miss Unique because an ex-boyfriend once called you the best he ever had, and your Grandmother said she had a dream that you became some important person, blah blah blah. Your potential is on a 100 but your actual life is on 30. You are full of fake confidence, and your results don’t match the shit you talk.

Take Miss Typical out to a bar and she doesn’t flirt, eye fuck, or give any man a reason to talk to her. So how does she meet men? She either hops on a dating app or waits for some random to DM her on social media. “But, G.L. what’s wrong with that?” It’s not the method it’s the mindset. Women who wait to get chose, date one man at a time. When you date one man at a time, it gives a vibe that SMART MEN sniff out.

This is how males win the game. Lonely women who don’t get that much attention will agree to any kind of date because they live by the motto “It’s whatever.” Are you trying to see me tomorrow after work—it’s whatever. Are you trying to go back to my place and hang a little longer—it’s whatever. Can I just put the tip in—it’s whatever. Common sense tells you that nobody is “whatever” every human being either wants something or doesn’t want something. The reason this Basica is talking about “whatever” is because she doesn’t know how to make men like her, so she just goes with the flow in a very nonchalant but submissive way.

Men have a playbook on how to break you down… stop being naive.

Weak Woman Logic: If I say, “No, you can’t come see me, but you can take me out this weekend when I’m free to see a movie,” that man will stop calling me. When you don’t feel as if you’re “enough,” you allow men to date you at their own pace; that’s how you think you’ll get him to fall in love. In reality, it does the opposite.

Once you establish that you’re not a woman who has standards when it comes to date activities, and you’re showing a man that you’re submissive to him, the male mind realizes that you aren’t high maintenance, and that he can now stop treating you like a girlfriend in the making and start treating you like a sex object.

HE THINKS: She likes me a lot more than I like her, so I can now try for sex without having to take her out on another date…

SHE THINKS: I like him a lot, so I don’t mind just going over to his place to hang out…

TWO WEEKS LATER: No more official date nights. Instead, it’s evolved into come over and chill, with sex involved. All thoughts of her being “wifey” are gone. Meanwhile, she still secretly thinks, “Maybe this will grow into more.” …it never does.

The Long Distance Situationship: Let’s take Miss Typical and put her in another type of situationship, the one where you’re hundreds or thousands of miles away. Long distance relationships only work 10% of the time, because it requires ONE thing—total dedication from both parties. To be fair, many women are loyal and can do without sex for stretches and will sacrifice money and time to fly or drive out. Men, on the other hand, rarely have the desire to not fuck something else, nor do they want to be flying across country unless that bond has already been established before the long distance started.

Situationships and Long Distances don’t mix. The LDS (Long Distance Situationship) is doomed from the jump, because you’re trying to be loyal to a person that isn’t yours. Talking on the phone is easy when it’s long-distance. You bond quicker than an episode of Love Is Blind, and it all feels very real.

Long talks until you fall asleep. Phone sex that becomes more intimate than real sex. Planning visits and endless talk about the future. It’s romantic, it’s exciting, and it forces you to be creative. There are women on date locally who can’t even get phone calls and barely know anything about the guys they date, so even though he’s far away, you’re in a better place than most women… but it’s all bullshit.

Long distance girls are a hobby for most men, and if you don’t put a label on anything and keep it at a situationship level, then it’s golden: You have a girl who isn’t around to annoy you with wanting dates. You have a girl who is willing to fly herself out to come fuck you. You have a girl who will wake up out of her sleep to help you jerk off via phone sex, even though she’s not horny and has to get up in a few hours for work. It’s the perfect relationship for a man who doesn’t want anything serious.

The best part is that in addition to her, you are still pulling various women in your city. You talk to her on the phone every day, but you still get to have sex with random girls who are local. Win/Win!

“I would be with you, but it’s the distance,” is an excuse that keeps you thinking it’s not a situationship, it’s just the right person at the wrong time. HA! That man doesn’t want you, but you’re very useful when he’s bored, so he’ll keep you around and gas your ego up for as long as you want to play stupid.

Most women in a LDR would rather be loyal to a fantasy than continue dating in reality! You don’t go out, you don’t even flirt with guys on the internet, and you even tell your friends that it’s serious. In the end, once you don’t have any more money to fly yourself out, or he finds a local girl that replaces you as his outlet, the calls will stop, and you’ll be left looking like a sucker. All those months spent loving someone who never loved you enough to say, “fuck the distance, you’re my girlfriend, and we’re going to make this work.”

Stop going out sad!

The On/Off Situationship: Stay in a woman’s life long enough for her to get used to you, and she’ll drop all standards. Ex-boyfriends or random dudes that have kept in contact over the years are the best at pulling off situationships because they sell their dick better than Timeshare companies.

“We always find our way back to each other, that’s my soulmate…” YAWN. Kill that fake spiritual shit and recognize that a man popping up every few months doesn’t mean it’s a sign from the universe, it means it’s a sign that no other woman wants that loser… but you.

So many men sneak back into a woman’s heart by saying, “I’m going to show you it’s different this time.” Theny go out twice, he puts his dick in you, hits those old spots that the new guys couldn’t hit, and now you’re telling people, “We’re not together we’re just working on some things.” A bold face LIE. You’re not building, you’re in a situationship with a man who has no bussiness being in your life.

These types of situationships work really well for the first month or two because it is exactly what you say it is. Do you know why this is? Because any man, no matter how fucked up he is, will be on his best behavior to ensure that you don’t change your mind about the arrangement. However, after he’s fucked you several times and has gotten comfortable again, he can drop the act and be the asshole he is normally. You’ll cut him off. In four months, he’ll call to apologize. …and the cycle repeats. Stop being an idiot and leave the past in the past.

The Forced Official Situationship: Finally we have the most common type of situationship, the one where a girl will finally put her foot down and demand a relationship. Miss Typical has had enough and she confronts this guy saying she wants to be serious. To her surprise, the guy says, “okay.” Here’s where men show their Supervillain IQ: A week after this talk, nothing changes. Okay, maybe you get to go to a movie or get taken to Cheesecake Factory, but in terms of the real shit– nada.

Calling him your boyfriend will not make him behave like a boyfriend! The spending time, the acting like he gives a fuck, the being accountable, it’s the same song and dance as before. After a month of this you’re even more stressed because now you have a boyfriend who doesn’t give a fuck as opposed to a dude you just fuck who isn’t supposed to give a fuck. You can’t put a collar on a dog and expect it to now stay in the house.

Real relationships don’t start with an ultimatum. A man chooses the woman he wants to be with on his own because he can’t imagine not having someone like that as his partner. When you force a situationship guy to become a relationship guy, you don’t change how he treats you. He still sees you as a placeholder, and he will continue to treat you like that because he doesn’t respect you enough to do the things boyfriends typically do.

Why would a man who doesn’t want you agree to be official? Men do not like hurting the feelings of women, most would rather disappear than tell you you’re whack, but when confronted with an ultimatum when they’re comfortable, a man will do what comes natural—lie! You want a relationship, we’re in the relationship, now shut up, and bend over.

Forcing a man will not result in a real transformation. Yeah we go together, but what does that mean? I’m supposed to answer my phone every time? I have to check in when I’m out late? I can’t fuck Tiffany? Good luck with that. Men who settle for Placeholders will always move how they want to with little respect for this “fake relationship”.

This forced boyfriend is still playing by his rules, and in order to not be the bad guy this is what he will do within the following weeks: He will be an asshole, and you will get soooo frustrated and argue that, “Men in relationships need to do blah blah blah. I need you to step up!” The moment you come at his neck, this guy will do exactly what he planned on doing all along, “See, this is why I told you I didn’t want anything serious!” Things were better before he was your official man, and he’s right.

You two will break up, and he will continue fucking you with no strings attached without you ever asking for a relationship again. He gave you want he wanted, and it backfired on you—Noncommittal Dicks 1 – Thirsty Bitches 0. Just because you have a bond and connection, doesn’t mean that it will amplify into true love once you put a label on it.

How to Upgrade a Situationship

Did you forget that one of the rules is “You Aren’t Going to Be Upgraded?” That shit wasn’t a typo. Sure you may be one of the few that gets a temporary relationship and have to suffer through the trying to make it work stage for a year until it collapses, but that’s hardly a prize. Most likely that man who’s gotten the milk for free will simply reject the idea of being with you officially. That’s right, go and ask him to make changes right now, and most likely he will say, “I’m good,” and shatter your overblown ego. Your scared ass should have made those demands during the first few weeks, now you’re three months too late. You can’t win in a situationship because situationships weren’t created for women to win.

Today’s men have evolved, they realize that Value Meal Women are so plentiful that there is no need to lie to these hoes like their Uncles did back in the 90’s. Today’s evolved men love bomb you, talk about everything they want to do with you, get the fast food pussy, maybe get a refill, and then discard you. “But we vibed…” No Basica, it wasn’t a vibe it was an Act! You’re in a situationship because that’s the only type of relationship you think you’re capable of getting a man to agree on. Where the fuck is your sense of worth?

The only situation that will ever benefit a woman is financial, never sexual. You have a “situation” called bills. You have a “situation” called shopping. If he wants to be your friend with benefits, cool. The benefits are that you will go hang out with him and keep him company, so long as he opens up his wallet and contributes to your happiness. No sex, no labels, just an equal exchange of your time for his generosity.

9 out of 10 of you will never tell a man what I just wrote. YET… you will let a man convince you that you should give him endless coochie, no strings attached, all because you think he’s cute and funny. HA. There’s never been a man that handsome or that funny, so why are you agreeing to be sexually exploited, but when it comes time to financially exploit a man, you back down? Stop letting the Patriarchy gaslight you into being a sexual object who gets the short end of the stick!

I saw some weak bitch meme about. “I’m only asking you what are we because I want to be clear before I let this other guy take me out.” That is the most pitiful shit ever! You mean to tell me that you’re so powerful and so independent, yet you wait on a MAN TO TELL YOU what your relationship status is before you date another man?

How am I more of a feminist than you and I have a dick? You don’t ask a man what you are, you tell him what you are! You don’t wait for him to get his shit together, he has to come with his shit together before he even calls your phone. If you want to be by yourself, you be by yourself for real, don’t play house and then get mad because the guy reminded you it was all “play”. You can’t force a relationship on a man and you can’t sneak a relationship in, you need to communicate what it is that you want and say that shit with your outside voice!

You upgrade a situationship by NOT BEING AFRAID to lose that man.

Here’s a SECRET: When he tells you he’s not looking for what you’re looking for… you look elsewhere, because he’s being honest! I don’t care if all you meet are men who don’t want anything serious, you keep searching until you find one that does think of you as good enough to go against his bachelor instincts. Spartans set their bar high and don’t give a fuck how many men fail to reach it. Spartans aren’t in a rush for a relationship with any man, they are on a quest for a relationship with the right man. Pussy is Power, learn the tactics to refine that power and stop stumbling around getting exploited by men!

For all the women reading this that are stressing over a man that’s not yours, don’t ask, “How can I get him to upgrade me,” ask, “When did I lose all self-respect for myself?” You weren’t forced at gunpoint, you weren’t tricked; you allowed yourself to be devalued by agreeing to be his “whatever” girl. Why the fuck would any woman agree to be leased by a man that doesn’t think she’s girlfriend pretty, girlfriend interesting, or girlfriend smart when she should be being pursued by men that want to own her flaws and all? Insecurity! No woman in a situationship is happy, she’s just comfortable.

Ladies, it’s not about upgrading the situationship; it’s about upgrading your mind so you will never again be the type of woman who thinks having half a boyfriend is cute or acceptable. Choose yourself because self-love means never having to ask a man, “What are we?”

When you’re ready to go deeper, listen or read my books: Men Don’t Love Women Like You, Ho Tactics, The Unicorn Delusion, and of course, Date Like A Spartan Expanded edition.

Click Here To Learn The Right Way To Start and Keep a New Relationship

Thanks for reading What is A Situationship & How To Upgrade A Situationship Into A Real Relationship

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

Endless app swiping, situationships, a new "first date" every month, and nothing to show for it. Each week, I'll get an email or have a Zoom coaching session, and it's, "Why is dating so hard right now?" Even when you finally land on someone who's bringing the right energy, it's a slow burn. Either a man is rushing and pressuring you way too fast, and you know it's love bombing, or he's dragging his feet for way too long, and you know he sees you as a "Placedholer".

When should you have sex? Should you be friends first? When do you post each other on social media? Everyone wants to know how to soft launch a relationship without the fear of being embarrassed the moment you tell the world about your new man.

Dating fatigue is real, and you can't keep doing the same basic, weak, lover-girl, things you did last year, expecting that you're magically going to meet the right one. Manifesting isn't magic. It's tactical. Results don't pop into existence because you want something bad enough. Winning happens when wisdom combines with strategy, and you FORCE this world to give you what you deserve. Success is snatched, never handed over.

"But there's no one out here... the guy I like is acting weird... I'm getting too old to find high-value men... all the good men are taken... maybe I'm in the wrong city to date..." Shut up and stop being a crybaby! A powerful mind conquers, while a weak mind remains conquered!

On today's podcast, I'm going to break down all of these dating questions with my special guest the legendary Black Fabio himself, Justin H, another man with his own philosophy on dating, so you can see that I'm not being biased, I'm not being too tough, and that there is no "secret formula" to win at dating in 2026. Once you know how men think and WHY men think the way they do, dating stops being hard, and it starts being a game that you can master within a matter of WEEKS.

Press Play Below To Listen & Get This Insight!

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Thanks for reading Why is dating So Hard Right Now? How to Soft Launch A Relationship

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

You're smart. You're funny. You're well-rounded. But no one wants you.

There's a saying with athletes, "If you're so talented, why aren't you playing pro ball?"

The same thing applies to love: "If you're so amazing, why aren't top-shelf men committing to you?"

Woman A: Single by choice... but not really. She has men she could date, but let's be honest, they're losers, clowns, fuckboys, or old flames. In reality, she's not single by choice; she's single because no high-value man wants her.

Woman B: Situationship Sally... She has a friend she hangs out with sometimes. They have fun, fuck, and then they both go back to their lives. She's not happy, but she's content because even though this man isn't serious, she's less lonely when he's around.

Woman C: Relationship Purgatory... She's committed to a man who doesn't really love her. He goes through the motions. He puts on a mask. But she knows this isn't what "love" should feel like. She'll read books, look at videos, even talk to her therapist, but the truth is she's stuck. Lonely, unappreciated, unloved.

Most women fall into these three categories, but don't see it that way. They refuse to admit that they're not getting what they want out of life when it comes to men, and today, we need to be honest so we can fix this.

The Passive Aggressive Life of A Basic Bitch

What makes a woman truly baisc? The fact that she has her phone in her hand all the time? The dumb TV shows she consumes? The endless social media scrolling? The face full of makeup? The cosmetic surgery to look like every other girl online?

No.

What makes a woman truly basic is a lack of belief in herself and control of her power. CONFIDENCE is everything. You can't be a true Spartan unless you can take a proactive stance to never accept "less than" as an option in your life. Most women claim they're confident, but they're confused. "What should I do?" or "How can I be better" are constantly on your mind, yet you have yet to evolve into someone who chooses right and always does better.

New Woman Old Dick

"This year's going to be different... I'm eating healthy, thinking healthy, and I'm not entertaining anyone who doesn't respect me..."

You're lying.

Too many of you date like this: Meet a guy, get swept up, then the guy shows his true colors, but you make excuses for him because the attention was too good. The dick was too good. The way he held you, looked at you, and told you he wanted you felt TOO GOOD... that even when you realized it was all a lie, you still couldn't let go.

You ladies play detective one day to figure out what's real and what's fake. Then you switch up and play pychologist, in order to explain why this man is a piece of shit that deserves chance after chance.

The Universe gives you the sign you've been asking for, and you double back like, "No, that's not right. I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing." Are you slow?! Every time you get proof that you need to move on, you don't see it as clarity. You see it as a chance to run back into the fire! "Wow, I can't believe. I got burnt!" You're not a victim, you're an accomplice.

Don't fix your face to call yourself a strong woman when you keep giving new chances to the same types of men. If you want better, you can't say it, you have to take action!

How To Upgrade Your Options.

"But, G.L. I don't want to walk away, I want to fix him."

The first step in upgrading your options is to know that the only way you can change a man is by replacing him with a better man, then allowing his jealously to explode to the point where he comes running back.

Can you do that? No? Because you're weak, soft, and easy to manipulate.

"I'm sorry, baby. I love you, I was just upset..." Is how you react when a man threatens to leave you for being sneaky or throwing another man in his face. You don't want to upgrade your options, you want the option you have to act right: Do you realize how crazy that sounds?

"But, G.L. I did try to upgrade, but I haven't been able to find anyone new."

Your Basic ass jumped on a dating app, got a few dates with guys who weren't impressed, and now you're ready to run back to that old thing because your ego is bruised. Cry me a fucking river.

Some of you aren't working jobs you're proud of... your life isn't exciting... maybe you put on weight over the years... and now that you're trying to date you realize: I'm not happy with myself. I don't look the way I want. I haven't achieved the goals I want to achieve. But I'm tired of being alone so let me try.

You're an unimpressive woman, trying to date the most attractive men on the dating apps, and then you go on these dates only to get ghosted afterwards. Let's be honest about what happened. This world is mental. If you don't believe you're good enough, the men sitting across won't believe you're good enough.

Don't pretend that rejection doesn't hurt. It does. You're sick of first dates, you're sick of pointless text messages, and guys who only see you as casual sex. In your depression, you do what every other basic woman does, you unblock your ex, start flirting with him again, and go backwards.

Exes or old fuck buddies, don't judge you. They don't care that you haven't gotten a new job or finished school like you said. They don't care if you gained some weight. They don't even care if you have absolutely nothing to talk about beyond dumb ass gossip, because they know who you are: Easy pussy who he doesn't have to lie to fuck.

Do you want to be the girl who keeps going backwards because she's too insecure to move forward? Or do you want to be the woman who looks in the mirror and decides to be a confident goddess who gets her happy ending? It's time to stop that dumb shit, stop being a lover girl, stop gaslighting yourself, and start standing up to these men.

Rule One: The Trap.

In order to trap a man, you don't need sex; you need... (sign up to continue reading)

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Thanks for reading Outwit The Dick – How To Date Better Men

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

It's easy to get a man's attention. But once you have it... How do you keep a man interested in you? In modern dating, a man chases you, applies pressure, wins you over—then suddenly cools off and falls back.

A week of non-stop texting then nothing.

Months of dating then nothing.

He'll even tell you how much you mean to him... then nothing.

Is it him? Is it you? Or is it how modern day attraction actually works?

How to Make a Man Interested in You and Keep Him Hooked

On today’s episode, we hear from a woman whose relationship is on CPR, as her boyfriend no longer initiates sex, compliments her, takes her out, and all the signs that he was going to propose have stopped.

Romantic fall off is way too common... Some women experience this in marriages. Others deal with it during the dating stage, and despite all this tough talk of "What he won't do, the next man will," The reality is: You don't want another man; you want the guy you like to reciprocate. So how can you fix this?

Keeping a man interested. Let’s break it into the short game and the long game.

Short-Term Attraction: Why Men Pursue So Hard at First

"How do I make a man commit when I don't even recognize the signs that he's losing interest?" Ladies, recognize that damn near everything with men is a game. Instead of reacting to a man, you need to understand how they think, so you're never the naive bird that thinks shallow pursuit = deeper interest.

Early attraction is fueled by the thrill of the chase. You're new, different, exciting: He's in love. Not really but it feels that way to men when lust takes over out little head and big head. The key word today is, LUST.

The adrenaline rush that comes from chasing New Pussy is such a high that most women don’t have to do anything to get attention, dates, or gifts.

A man’s lust to unwrap what’s under your clothes keeps him applying pressure.

A man’s lust blinds him to things he may not like about your personality.

After he has sex with you, or if he meets another woman who invokes more lust in him than you (example: that new girl he meets at work), then the chase ends.

Once lust begins to dry out, a man can be honest about how he feels about you and walk away.

Every single week women ask me variations of:

“Why did he change after a few dates?”

“Why does he message me but never ask me out?”

“Why did he lose interest after things got comfortable?”

In the early stage of dating, 9 out of 10 times when a man loses interests it's because he has another woman who he sees as a better option. Or he already has another woman who is a better option.

Think about this. I'll get your number, message you, wanting to fuck because you're new and shiny. After a few conversations, you're not what I thought you were, either you're boring, not flirty, or maybe too awkward or weird for my taste. It's over. Why would I drive somewhere to take out a woman like that? Why would I play the "love bomb" game when I have other girls on the roster?

The initial chase is not proof of long-term investment.

Disinterested men can walk away even without sex, because they have better or easier options than you. In ratchet terms: If a man you recently met doesn't chase beyond messages or texts, it’s usually because he already has access to coochie. "But he still reaches out," sweetie, let go of that ego. Communicating isn't that deep. You are just entertainment, not something he actually wants to spend money on to take out.

Just last month, I had a Zoom call with a reader, and she asked me, “Why is he starting to act differently after four dates, and we didn’t have sex?” I told her that another woman caught his eye. She made excuses as to why that was impossible... Yesterday, she emailed me telling me that her friend saw this guy at some Super Bowl event hugged up with another woman. ...I'm not always right, but I'm right 99% of the time.

Men have exes. Men have girls on dating apps. Men have girls at work. Men have girls from back in their school days. Men have access to past women and new women, so the moment you're not giving the vibes they're after, they will walk away unless you're truly a One of One Gamechanger...

You're Pretty BUT Still A Placeholder

Being pretty won’t necessarily get commitment. "If only I looked like that girl on Instagram that all the rappers thirst after, I'd be happy." No, ma'am, you wouldn't. The grass doesn't become greener by making yourself more of an object for men to lust after, it just means you'll get more attention... the wrong kind of attention 90% of the time from men just looking for a turn.

Pursuit isn't the same thing as emotional attachment!

“Look at my Glow Up! I’m cute, he’s chasing me, I won,” No beloved, you’re getting low-hanging fruit lust-based attention from men who are pretending to care about how your day was. A glow up isn't new titties, it's a new way of thinking, seducing, and bonding that separates you from every other carbon copy woman in a Fashion Nova outfit.

Physical attraction will never trump a soul tie based on shared interests and similar personalities.

If your personality doesn’t mesh with a man's beyond the lust stage, he will eventually lose interest. You look good enough to sleep with, but you're not good enough to be with long-term. This is called being a Placeholder.

I’ve written about this for years and how to become a Game Changer, but you still don’t listen. You’re a Basica, pretending to be a Spartan, and STILL haven’t grasped the fundamentals of my books. I don't care how pretty you are; some random 22-year-old is going to snatch his attention from you, not because she's the cutest, but because he'll see her as way more fun than you are.

"Why doesn't he want me?" Beloved, your connection doesn’t go beyond physical chemistry! You are a placeholder — someone who fills time but isn’t seen as a future partner.

Long-Term Attraction: Why Men Lose Interest During The Relationship Stage

Some of you graduate from the dating stage, make it to a relationship, and then the attraction level from your man falls off. Why?

At this stage is usually isn’t a new woman, as even a married man can lust after new pussy, and still not leave his wife for it. Relationships reveal true incompatibilities that the honeymoon stage of dating masks.

If a man you’ve been with for months or years loses interest and no longer sees a future with you, it’s you.

You’re the problem.

He has realized something about you that has turned him off. This could be legitimate: You do things that truly bother him for no good reason. Or this could be self-sabotage: He’s upset with his own life, so he blames you because he can’t take accountability.

“G.L., we were together for three years, and he just decided he didn’t want to be with me anymore out of the blue. There were no signs.”

There are always signs! There are always ways to stop a man from losing interests

How to Become a Woman a Man Doesn’t Get Bored With

Whether you’re in the short game or long game, lasting attraction requires more than looks or chemistry.

It requires becoming someone who adds value to a man’s life emotionally, mentally, and practically.

In this episode, I break down how to “Spartan Up” and build the qualities that sustain long-term desire and respect.

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Thanks for reading Why Men Lose Interest and How to Keep Him Hooked

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

Dick is abundant, low value, and the men attached to it are usually clowns. But if you block him, only to end up unblocking every time he makes you upset, then you're in the circus too. You're asking your friends, family, and ChatGPT, "What does this mean?" "Why is he acting like this?" "What should I say to him?" because you still think men are the prize. You're not strong, you're not in control, you're soft and reactionary, and these men keep playing in your face because all you project is low vibraitonal "please love me" energy.

It's time to Spartan The Fuck Up.

Your love life is a broken record. You meet a guy, act like you don't like him, then a week later, you're planning an entire future in your head, based around him, him, him... all because of what? These men are rarely impressive. You're just desperate. Lies sound like music and excuses read like poetry when you're hard up for love.

A man is never too busy to spend time with a woman he actually likes... but there you go believing that his work schedule makes it impossible for him to see you.

Valentine's Day isn't just a holiday, it's a chance to plan and show you how much he cares... but there you go getting shortchanged, no card, no chocolate, no flowers. That's not your man, princess; that's someone insulting your intelligence.

Every February, I get a spike in women coming to me for advice. Why?

The "happy being single" crowd realizes that they're lying to themselves and DO want love. The "situationship" ladies finally wake up and realize that being friends with benefits is basic and degrading. "I just want sex too, I'm not looking for anything serious." Bitch, you're lying. You think your grandmother would be proud that you're Delivery Pussy for a random man? Nevertheless, the most disrespected group of women this time of the year are those who are dating or in a relationship and realize they're not appreciated, valued, or worth the effort of planning something special.

I once saw a video of a 16-year-old decorating his girlfriend's locker on Valentine's Day… you're dealing with a grown ass man who couldn't be bothered to send flowers to your house?

Men learn from an early age what it means to be romantic and show out for a woman; we don't need to be trained! So if a guy isn't showing up for you, it's ON PURPOSE. The little voice in his head thinks about you and decides: Nah, she ain't worth it. Why would you ever fuck someone on February 15th who ignored your texts on February 14th?

Don't ever fix your lips to tell a man "I love you" if he can't be bothered to show up, show out, and make you feel special!

Podcast Question 1Podcast Question 2Podcast Question 3

The first step in getting better results is being honest with why you're attracting low-value treatment.

Your friends or co-workers ask, "What are you two doing for Valentine's Day?" and you get embarrassed. Either you lie, or you act like you don't care about it. Once again, throwing on a mask to protect your feelings because you know damn well it's not just a holiday, it's a test: Does this guy I've been giving all this energy to really like me enough to prove it with romantic effort?

The answer on Februrary 14th will be "no" he doesn't fuck with you like that, dummy.

The answer on your birthday will be "no" he doesn't fuck with you like that, dummy.

The answer for the rest of your life will continue to be "no" because you date without power, entertain men who secretly think you're a joke, and project Placeholder Energy.

How many more years are you going to front like you're okay with being overlooked, unappreciated, and unloved? How many first dates, fuck buddies, Instagram stalking, breakups, and sleepless nights before you finally take control and Spartan Up?

If you're going to be single, have a roster of men who can do for you. If you're going to be in a relationship, it should be with a man who moves with action, not a bunch of talk. If you're going to be a side ho, a mistress, "friend with benefits", at least deal with a man that can take you to Chanel or buy you a Van Cleef bracelet!

On today's show, I'm going to give a sermon on how to get your love life in order and lead with power no matter if you're single, "have a friend," or are in a full blown relationship. School's in session.

Press Play Below To Listen!

Non Members TAP HERE to download this episode...

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Premium Membership $2.99 Full Access! Premium ArticlesNew Episodes of The G.L. Lambert PodcastsE-Book and Audio DownloadsUnlock Black Girls Are Easy Content Tap Here To Sign Up Most Popular Platinum Membership $49.99 / Month Monthly Coaching Included! Everything In The Premium MembershipPlus Email Advice From G.L. Lambert Every Month! Tap Here To Sign Up Yearly Membership UNLOCK EVERYTHING FOR A YEAR! One Year Access + Life Coaching Private coaching with G.L. Lambert50% off @ SolvingSingle.comExclusive Ebook Emailed To You Tap Here To Sign Up Current members login using the form below to unlock this page...

Thanks for reading How To Get Your Worth

Far From BasYc by G.L. Lambert

Dick is abundant, low value, and the men attached to it are usually clowns. But if you block him, only to end up unblocking every time he makes you upset, then you're in the circus too. You're asking your friends, family, and ChatGPT, "What does this mean?" "Why is he acting like this?" "What should I say to him?" because you still think men are the prize. You're not strong, you're not in control, you're soft and reactionary, and these men keep playing in your face because all you project is low vibraitonal "please love me" energy.

It's time to Spartan The Fuck Up.

Your love life is a broken record. You meet a guy, act like you don't like him, then a week later, you're planning an entire future in your head, based around him, him, him... all because of what? These men are rarely impressive. You're just desperate. Lies sound like music and excuses read like poetry when you're hard up for love.

A man is never too busy to spend time with a woman he actually likes... but there you go believing that his work schedule makes it impossible for him to see you.

Valentine's Day isn't just a holiday, it's a chance to plan and show you how much he cares... but there you go getting shortchanged, no card, no chocolate, no flowers. That's not your man, princess; that's someone insulting your intelligence.

Every February, I get a spike in women coming to me for advice. Why?

The "happy being single" crowd realizes that they're lying to themselves and DO want love. The "situationship" ladies finally wake up and realize that being friends with benefits is basic and degrading. "I just want sex too, I'm not looking for anything serious." Bitch, you're lying. You think your grandmother would be proud that you're Delivery Pussy for a random man? Nevertheless, the most disrespected group of women this time of the year are those who are dating or in a relationship and realize they're not appreciated, valued, or worth the effort of planning something special.

I once saw a video of a 16-year-old decorating his girlfriend's locker on Valentine's Day… you're dealing with a grown ass man who couldn't be bothered to send flowers to your house?

Men learn from an early age what it means to be romantic and show out for a woman; we don't need to be trained! So if a guy isn't showing up for you, it's ON PURPOSE. The little voice in his head thinks about you and decides: Nah, she ain't worth it. Why would you ever fuck someone on February 15th who ignored your texts on February 14th?

Don't ever fix your lips to tell a man "I love you" if he can't be bothered to show up, show out, and make you feel special!

Podcast Question 1Podcast Question 2Podcast Question 3

The first step in getting better results is being honest with why you're attracting low-value treatment.

Your friends or co-workers ask, "What are you two doing for Valentine's Day?" and you get embarrassed. Either you lie, or you act like you don't care about it. Once again, throwing on a mask to protect your feelings because you know damn well it's not just a holiday, it's a test: Does this guy I've been giving all this energy to really like me enough to prove it with romantic effort?

The answer on Februrary 14th will be "no" he doesn't fuck with you like that, dummy.

The answer on your birthday will be "no" he doesn't fuck with you like that, dummy.

The answer for the rest of your life will continue to be "no" because you date without power, entertain men who secretly think you're a joke, and project Placeholder Energy.

How many more years are you going to front like you're okay with being overlooked, unappreciated, and unloved? How many first dates, fuck buddies, Instagram stalking, breakups, and sleepless nights before you finally take control and Spartan Up?

If you're going to be single, have a roster of men who can do for you. If you're going to be in a relationship, it should be with a man who moves with action, not a bunch of talk. If you're going to be a side ho, a mistress, "friend with benefits", at least deal with a man that can take you to Chanel or buy you a Van Cleef bracelet!

On today's show, I'm going to give a sermon on how to get your love life in order and lead with power no matter if you're single, "have a friend," or are in a full blown relationship. School's in session.

Press Play Below To Listen!

UNLOCK THIS PAGE & HUNDREDS OF OTHER ARTICLES, PODCASTS, AND BOOK DOWNLOADS By Bestselling Author G.L. Lambert by signing up below...

Premium Membership $2.99 Full Access! Premium ArticlesNew Episodes of The G.L. Lambert PodcastsE-Book and Audio DownloadsUnlock Black Girls Are Easy Content Tap Here To Sign Up Most Popular Platinum Membership $49.99 / Month Monthly Coaching Included! Everything In The Premium MembershipPlus Email Advice From G.L. Lambert Every Month! Tap Here To Sign Up Yearly Membership UNLOCK EVERYTHING FOR A YEAR! One Year Access + Life Coaching Private coaching with G.L. Lambert50% off @ SolvingSingle.comExclusive Ebook Emailed To You Tap Here To Sign Up Current members login using the form below to unlock this page... Username or E-mail Password Remember Me     Forgot Password

Thanks for reading How To Get Your Worth – Valentine’s Day & Beyond