Purvesh Janee's Blog

Now available for download on Amazon, "Literature Festival" my new short fiction : https://www.amazon.in/dp/B0755GL3HV/r...

www.purveshjanee.com

Hi Friends ! Forbidden Fruit my short story earlier posted on the blog is now available in the Amazon Kindle Store as a Kindle Ebook and can be downloaded from here :
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007QTK8UU/
The Short Story would be available for Free download during promotional days - Sundays and on all days for Kindle Prime Members ! Prime members can even download and lend it for free :)

Excerpt from the Story :Past twenty four hours were part of the most precious ones I would've lived in my entire life. 
I did have a great time yesterday but then, why was I feeling as if I had committed some kind of a crime or as if I was guilty? Having lived the fantasy and craving that I had for long in life is not crime for god’s sake!
Well! I tried reasoning a lot between the battle of morals that was going on between my heart and logical brain, heart felt I didn’t do anything for which I need to feel guilty for but the all so reasoning moronic brain was against my heart and felt that I shouldn’t have crossed my limits!
This conflicting chain of thoughts was broken by Pearl, who was undoubtedly more beautiful than the shining Pearl necklace that she had worn. It felt as if queen of the Fairies from fairyland chose to visit earth wearing a Star studded Purple dress with tiny twinkling stars. 
She called for my name while checking a watch at Lifestyle watches section, while I was busy checking out some exotic fragrances “Avi, please come here, see this watch, isn’t it an awesome piece of work? Try it out on your wrist let me see how it looks”
“It’s nice but then why are you buying a Men’s watch?” I wondered whether she was buying it for me as a gift!
To read more click here and download the ebook :http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007QTK8UU/
Share the link with your friends and if you are a Kindle member click on Like button if you like the story and post your reviews :)www.purveshjanee.com

 Hi Friends ! Parallel Lives my first short story earlier posted on the blog is now available in the Amazon Kindle Store as a Kindle Ebook and can be downloaded from here :

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00720LJRO

The Short Story would be available for Free download during promotional days - Sundays and on all days for Kindle Prime Members ! Prime members can even download and lend it for free :)

Excerpt from the Story :

‘Hey ! When did you return from Mumbai ?, I thought you were on a month long vacation, why did you come back in two weeks ?, Couple of days back you said that Ryan had offered you a role to head the office our company was thinking about opening in India, you were pretty excited and wanted to opt for it, how come you suddenly canned your trip and return to Singapore ?, is everything alright back home ?’ Kabir as usual threw series of questions without waiting for any answers from his friend Dev.
Dev replied without looking at Kabir, frantically typing something on his Laptop ‘Kabir, Let me wrap up my work first, I am working on something really urgent, we will discuss it over drinks tonight, let's have dinner together at my place, and I’ll answer all your questions’. Kabir strongly felt that something had definitely gone wrong during his friend’s India trip, but then he chose to wait till evening.
Click Here to Download the Kindle Ebook :

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00720LJRO

Share the link with your friends and if you are a Kindle member click on Like button if you like the story and post your reviews :)www.purveshjanee.com

Hollywood Remake of Sholay …

Amidst all the Cricket World Cup 2011 frenzy, I thought of watching movie 'Just Go With IT' starring Jennifer Aniston & Adam Sandler. The movie was good but within 10 minutes of the start of movie, I had 'I have seen this movie before' kind of feeling, the same feeling that you have when you watch those Hollywood inspired Bollywood movies. Yes this movie had a storyline similar to Salman Khan Starrer “Maine Pyaar Kyun Kiya”.
I was somehow happy that bollywood has managed to reach to a level where Hollywood is taking inspiration from our movies (it could also be a mere coincidence though). While returning back from the movie, I had a weird thought, What if a remake of Sholay was made in Hollywood ?, Who would be in the star cast, What would be the movie theme ? & some similar idiotic thoughts which I felt should share with you all :
Name of the Movie : Sea of FlamesDirector : Danny BoyleMusic : A R RehmanLocation : Rio de Janeiro

Star Cast :

Bollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameThakurTuckerBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Sanjeev Kumar Tom HanksBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameGabbarGabrielBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Amjad Khan Robert De NiroBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameJai (Jaidev)JackBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Amitabh Bachchan Will SmithBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameVeeruVictorBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Dharmendra Gerard ButlerBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameRadhaRoseBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Jaya Bhaduri Julia RobertsBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameBasantiBettyBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Hema Malini Catherine Zeta-JonesBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameMausieAunt LilyBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Leela Mishra Meryl StreepBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameRamlalRobertBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Satyendra Kapoor A RobotBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameSaambhaGoogleBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Mac Mohan GoogleBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameKaaliaBlackyBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Viju Khote Martin LawrenceBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameJailorJailorBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Asrani Owen WilsonBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameHariramHarryBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Keshto Mukherjee Adam SandlerBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameSoorma BhopaliSmarty BrianBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Jagdeep Ben StillerBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameGypsy dancerShakiraBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Helen ShakiraBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameImaam SahebImaam SahebBollywood ActorHollywood Actor A K Hangal Morgan FreemanBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameAhmedAhmedBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Sachin Leonardo DiCaprio

Plot:
In Hollywood version of the movie, FBI agent's family is killed by Don named Gabriel, he decides to fight back and recruits two convicts, Jack and Victor. He approaches them in a Bangkok Jail and offers them to be part of secret mission, they agree to bring in Gabriel alive - for a hefty price. After getting discharged from jail they have some fun at Bangkok followed by an Item Number by Mallika Sherawat, and travel by Charter Plane to Rio, the Secret Agent lives there with his widowed daughter-in-law and a Robot. All three fight against one of the most elusive and dreaded Don of all times. In this hollywood version horses are replaced by sports bikes, Dhanno and the horse carriage is replaced by Ferrari and there is no coin coz its the age of Plastic Money :p 
Some Dialogues :
Gabriel
Tucker Gimme Your Handssss ......Dies the one who is Afraid !When is Halloween, Halloween is When ? Wonder which Bakery's bread to they feed these Rio De Janeiro gals, they are crispy ! Your Friendship reminds me of Brokeback Mountain !He'll breath till you dance ! Shake it Baby ... Shake it Baby ....

Tucker
Go and tell Gabriel that Rio people have stopped feeding bread to mad dogs.The Iron is Hot, Hammer it !Tucker can't be cut, neither can he bend, he can only die !

Jack
All police men look alike to me ! What's your name Betty ?

Victor
If you will kill one, we will kill four !Betty don't dance in front of these fucking DogsDoggy, I am gonna suck your blood !

Imaam: Why is there a pin drop silence ?
www.purveshjanee.com[image error]

Hollywood Remake of Sholay …

Amidst all the Cricket World Cup 2011 frenzy, I thought of watching movie 'Just Go With IT' starring Jennifer Aniston & Adam Sandler. The movie was good but within 10 minutes of the start of movie, I had 'I have seen this movie before' kind of feeling, the same feeling that you have when you watch those Hollywood inspired Bollywood movies. Yes this movie had a storyline similar to Salman Khan Starrer “Maine Pyaar Kyun Kiya”.
I was somehow happy that bollywood has managed to reach to a level where Hollywood is taking inspiration from our movies (it could also be a mere coincidence though). While returning back from the movie, I had a weird thought, What if a remake of Sholay was made in Hollywood ?, Who would be in the star cast, What would be the movie theme ? & some similar idiotic thoughts which I felt should share with you all :
Name of the Movie : Sea of FlamesDirector : Danny BoyleMusic : A R RehmanLocation : Rio de Janeiro

Star Cast :

Bollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameThakurTuckerBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Sanjeev Kumar Tom HanksBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameGabbarGabrielBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Amjad Khan Robert De NiroBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameJai (Jaidev)JackBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Amitabh Bachchan Will SmithBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameVeeruVictorBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Dharmendra Gerard ButlerBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameRadhaRoseBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Jaya Bhaduri Julia RobertsBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameBasantiBettyBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Hema Malini Catherine Zeta-JonesBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameMausieAunt LilyBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Leela Mishra Meryl StreepBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameRamlalRobertBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Satyendra Kapoor A RobotBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameSaambhaGoogleBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Mac Mohan GoogleBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameKaaliaBlackyBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Viju Khote Martin LawrenceBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameJailorJailorBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Asrani Owen WilsonBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameHariramHarryBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Keshto Mukherjee Adam SandlerBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameSoorma BhopaliSmarty BrianBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Jagdeep Ben StillerBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameGypsy dancerShakiraBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Helen ShakiraBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameImaam SahebImaam SahebBollywood ActorHollywood Actor A K Hangal Morgan FreemanBollywood Character NameHollywood Character NameAhmedAhmedBollywood ActorHollywood Actor Sachin Leonardo DiCaprio

Plot:
In Hollywood version of the movie, FBI agent's family is killed by Don named Gabriel, he decides to fight back and recruits two convicts, Jack and Victor. He approaches them in a Bangkok Jail and offers them to be part of secret mission, they agree to bring in Gabriel alive - for a hefty price. After getting discharged from jail they have some fun at Bangkok followed by an Item Number by Mallika Sherawat, and travel by Charter Plane to Rio, the Secret Agent lives there with his widowed daughter-in-law and a Robot. All three fight against one of the most elusive and dreaded Don of all times. In this hollywood version horses are replaced by sports bikes, Dhanno and the horse carriage is replaced by Ferrari and there is no coin coz its the age of Plastic Money :p 
Some Dialogues :
Gabriel
Tucker Gimme Your Handssss ......Dies the one who is Afraid !When is Halloween, Halloween is When ? Wonder which Bakery's bread to they feed these Rio De Janeiro gals, they are crispy ! Your Friendship reminds me of Brokeback Mountain !He'll breath till you dance ! Shake it Baby ... Shake it Baby ....

Tucker
Go and tell Gabriel that Rio people have stopped feeding bread to mad dogs.The Iron is Hot, Hammer it !Tucker can't be cut, neither can he bend, he can only die !

Jack
All police men look alike to me ! What's your name Betty ?

Victor
If you will kill one, we will kill four !Betty don't dance in front of these fucking DogsDoggy, I am gonna suck your blood !

Imaam: Why is there a pin drop silence ?
www.purveshjanee.com

 This happens time and again with me in my life, It’s almost like Murphy's Law. Whenever I am not carrying change and travelling by either Bus, Taxi or Auto or for that matter where ever I go the other person will stare at me like I would have given him a Rs.1000 note for a transaction of Rs.10 and with a disgusted look on his face will ask me "Chutta nahi hai kya ?" and I feel like saying “MC Chutta hota to deta nahi kya ?”. The sequence usually follows with an ugly argument leaving me with bad taste (followed by a gyaan session on “how to behave with others” by my wife) and my feelings are very well narrated in the modified version of famous “Sutta Song” edited to “Chutta Na Mila” : Doston mein Bus baitha main Chutta gin rahaConductor ne mujhe Chutta ginte dekh liyaOffice ke Stop pe pahuncha to panga ho gayaBC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.
Moive dekhne Auto mein gaya Auto driver mujhpe savaar ho gaya,Usne bhi mujhse mera Chutta cheen liyaSadkon pe ghooma main tanha reh gayaBC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.
Taxi book ki main aur usme ghoom rahaShaam bhar traffic mein ghoomaya mein thak ke gir gayaTraffice mein fasne ke kaaran mera Chutta chin gaya, BC Chutta.
BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.
BC MC, BC MC BC MC.BC MC, BC MC BC MC.BC MC, BC MC BC MC.BC MC, BC MC BC MC.
To avoid similar instances in future nowadays I carry change with me and If I don't have change, I do ensure that I check with the Cabbie, Autowala or Bus Conductor "Chutta hai na ?".www.purveshjanee.com[image error]

 This happens time and again with me in my life, It’s almost like Murphy's Law. Whenever I am not carrying change and travelling by either Bus, Taxi or Auto or for that matter where ever I go the other person will stare at me like I would have given him a Rs.1000 note for a transaction of Rs.10 and with a disgusted look on his face will ask me "Chutta nahi hai kya ?" and I feel like saying “MC Chutta hota to deta nahi kya ?”. The sequence usually follows with an ugly argument leaving me with bad taste (followed by a gyaan session on “how to behave with others” by my wife) and my feelings are very well narrated in the modified version of famous “Sutta Song” edited to “Chutta Na Mila” : Doston mein Bus baitha main Chutta gin rahaConductor ne mujhe Chutta ginte dekh liyaOffice ke Stop pe pahuncha to panga ho gayaBC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.
Moive dekhne Auto mein gaya Auto driver mujhpe savaar ho gaya,Usne bhi mujhse mera Chutta cheen liyaSadkon pe ghooma main tanha reh gayaBC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.
Taxi book ki main aur usme ghoom rahaShaam bhar traffic mein ghoomaya mein thak ke gir gayaTraffice mein fasne ke kaaran mera Chutta chin gaya, BC Chutta.
BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, mujhe Chutta na mila.BC Chutta, Chutta na mila.
BC MC, BC MC BC MC.BC MC, BC MC BC MC.BC MC, BC MC BC MC.BC MC, BC MC BC MC.
To avoid similar instances in future nowadays I carry change with me and If I don't have change, I do ensure that I check with the Cabbie, Autowala or Bus Conductor "Chutta hai na ?".www.purveshjanee.com

The day is starting a bit early these days as I start my work from 7’o clock in the morning, to reach on time I need to wake up at 5:30 am. There are many positive sides to waking up early other than the usual health thingy and one of them is you no longer need to face Mumbai’s peak hour traffic either on my way to work or on my way back home, which also means saving precious 2 hours of commuting time daily.
Life has been so far so good in 2011 beginning with the end of me travelling by Mumbai Local (which obviously was worse than travelling by poultry van).  Life comes full circle after 5 years and am back in the plush area of Hiranandani – Powai, it was my first day in Mumbai and this was the place where I had first stepped in for working with a BPO, but this time am well prepared to face challenges thrown by life (almost felt like Vijay Deenanath Chauhan - Amitabh Bachchan in Agneepath while standing in front of that BPO office). Things have changed a lot, life has changed a lot, and the surroundings have changed a lot. I am now a certified Mumbaikar.
I however am travelling on my journey back home by these new Kinglong A/C. Buses which are luxurious and very comfortable with seats almost empty as I travel mostly during off peak hours. I would strongly recommend anyone who is tired to drive at work to start travelling by these buses coz they are comfy as well as easy on your pocket and you can as well utilize the time either connecting to friends via social network, work on your way or can spend quality time reading books or listening to music.
One thing that’s common in these buses and Mumbai local trains are Gujjubhais, who continue to yell on top of their voice while talking on phone or conversing with their fellow co-passengers.www.purveshjanee.com[image error]

The day is starting a bit early these days as I start my work from 7’o clock in the morning, to reach on time I need to wake up at 5:30 am. There are many positive sides to waking up early other than the usual health thingy and one of them is you no longer need to face Mumbai’s peak hour traffic either on my way to work or on my way back home, which also means saving precious 2 hours of commuting time daily.
Life has been so far so good in 2011 beginning with the end of me travelling by Mumbai Local (which obviously was worse than travelling by poultry van).  Life comes full circle after 5 years and am back in the plush area of Hiranandani – Powai, it was my first day in Mumbai and this was the place where I had first stepped in for working with a BPO, but this time am well prepared to face challenges thrown by life (almost felt like Vijay Deenanath Chauhan - Amitabh Bachchan in Agneepath while standing in front of that BPO office). Things have changed a lot, life has changed a lot, and the surroundings have changed a lot. I am now a certified Mumbaikar.
I however am travelling on my journey back home by these new Kinglong A/C. Buses which are luxurious and very comfortable with seats almost empty as I travel mostly during off peak hours. I would strongly recommend anyone who is tired to drive at work to start travelling by these buses coz they are comfy as well as easy on your pocket and you can as well utilize the time either connecting to friends via social network, work on your way or can spend quality time reading books or listening to music.
One thing that’s common in these buses and Mumbai local trains are Gujjubhais, who continue to yell on top of their voice while talking on phone or conversing with their fellow co-passengers.www.purveshjanee.com

"Kari Kari ne No Kari Enu Naam Nokri" (Done Done and Not Done is known as Job Done) – Gujju Saying
I was pretty excited today coz it was Friday night which also meant time for Yaaran Da Tashan (Beer Party). I bathed, got dressed in comfortable clothes and was on my way to have fun.
We met at friend’s pad whose parents were gonna be outta town over the weekend. His room was nicely decorated with mood lighting, his newly bought LED TV which was tuned on NDTV Good Times showing “Highway on my Plate” hosted by Rocky & Mayur followed by Tata DoCoMo Ad where there is a guy who lands up job on his own terms and conditions.
I was tired all because of days work and was looking forward for stress bursting session. Our Stress bursting session meant discussing anything randomly with PJs thrown in accompanied by munching and loads of booze. Someone commented “If I get Rocky & Mayur kinda job to do, I would never ever crib about my life or for that matter my job and if not then maybe get some new job in a way which this Tata DoCoMo guy managed to grab that dream job”.
This comment lead to a pretty weird discussion, after couple of drinks, I said “Hey, how about starting a different kind of Job Consultancy something similar to Marriage Bureau ?”. To which other’s said “You’re drunk or what, kya bakwaas kar raha hai ?”. I said “No friends am serious, people crib about their job only because they land up in one which does not meet their expectations, if they get job in the field they are passionate about on their terms then why would people complain ?”.
After a brief drunk brain storming session, we zeroed in on collecting following details from the candidate :
Name : Name, that he/she chooses to be called. Not mandatory that it needs to match with his birth certificate (as is the case with movie stars).
Gender : His/her own gender and the gender he/she would prefer to work with, in the team.
Janma Kundali : Candidate’s Janma Kundali would be mandatory so that it can be matched with his/her future boss’s Kundali and all the Grah Shanti and other similar rituals will be offered as a package for better future of Candidate & his/her Boss.
Likes : A list of hobbies he/she pursues and the kind of way in which he/she would like to be treated by his seniors and peers.
Dislikes : A list of things the candidate dislikes and the behaviours which the candidate does not like.
Passion / Areas of Interest : List of things which the candidate is passionate about or the kind of work that interests the candidate.
Dream Holiday Destinations : List of Dream Holiday destination where the candidate would prefer to go for company outings, offshore assignments or business meetings.
Resume : A Copy of resume with a list of good and bad experiences the candidate has had with previous work areas.
No. of Work Hours Preferred : Number of hours the candidate would like to work in a day.
No. of Breaks Preferred : Number of Breaks and Type of Breaks preferred by the candidate (eg: 3 hours break in a 8 hrs work day and break types as in tea break, loo break, smoke break, work break, gossip break, personal phone call break, etc...)
No. of Weekdays Preferred : Number of days which should be kept as weekdays (Monday is obviously not a preferred choice).
No. of Holidays Preferred : Number of Public holidays and paid leaves preferred by the candidate.
Type of Food Preferred : The Candidate needs to mention this elaborately cause as they say good food is key to man’s heart. This list would help to analyse if the organisation has the cafeteria which provides food as per the candidate’s preference.
Basic Amenities Desired : The Candidate must provide a list of basic amenities that he/she expects in his/her future place of work. (eg: To & Fro Transport Facility, PC with admin access, Internet Access with Personal Email and Social Networking Sites, should be allowed to carry camera phones, should be allowed to connect personal devices like Pen Drives, Smart Phones, etc.).
Salary Required : Non-negotiable Salary expected by the candidate with a brief list of perks and incentives desired.
Gender of Boss : Whether the reporting manager needs to be male/female, so that based on gender preference and compatibility a desired job could be identified (there are people who are not comfortable working with reporting manager of opposite gender).
Background Check : This would be a paid service where background check would be done of future reporting manager & organisation, so that there are no surprises when a person joins in.
Pen down if you have something more to add to the above list in comments box ........

www.purveshjanee.com[image error]