Ryan Patricks

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Ryan Patricks

Goodreads Author


Born
in New York, The United States
Website

Twitter

Genre

Influences

Member Since
July 2014



Ryan is a "pre-successful" San Francisco comedy writer and unlicensed chiropractor. He is a regular contributor to US Weekly, What's Really Good Magazine, and various comment sections of internet puppy videos. His work has appeared on numerous comedy websites and his mom's refrigerator.

His first book, You're Not Helping..., was published by Story Merchant in July 2014.

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Average rating: 3.67 · 112 ratings · 14 reviews · 2 distinct works
You're Not Helping...

3.67 avg rating — 112 ratings — published 2014 — 4 editions
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Quotes by Ryan Patricks  (?)
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“Instead, Sebastian is the patron saint of athletes and archers. So, to recap: he never played a sport, was shot with a ton of arrows and then beaten to death with clubs and bats, and the Church made him the patron saint of athletes and archers! Essentially, we made him the patron saint of people who brandish clubs, bats or bows. That means someone trying to shoot something with an arrow or hit something with a bat, may actually pray to Sebastian for help. Why would we do that to him? If I were Sebastian, I would never want to see an arrow, archer or bat again. That’s like making JFK the patron saint of sharpshooters, or Elvis the patron saint of bacon cheeseburgers.”
Ryan Patricks, You're Not Helping...

“It’s a common storyline and mythology in the comic book community—which technically is the only community more frightened by the vagina than the religious community.”
Ryan Patricks, You're Not Helping...

“Blogs are like kids or art, when it’s your own you think it’s amazing, but honestly, no one else cares.”
Ryan Patricks, You're Not Helping...

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“It’s a common storyline and mythology in the comic book community—which technically is the only community more frightened by the vagina than the religious community.”
Ryan Patricks, You're Not Helping...

“Instead, Sebastian is the patron saint of athletes and archers. So, to recap: he never played a sport, was shot with a ton of arrows and then beaten to death with clubs and bats, and the Church made him the patron saint of athletes and archers! Essentially, we made him the patron saint of people who brandish clubs, bats or bows. That means someone trying to shoot something with an arrow or hit something with a bat, may actually pray to Sebastian for help. Why would we do that to him? If I were Sebastian, I would never want to see an arrow, archer or bat again. That’s like making JFK the patron saint of sharpshooters, or Elvis the patron saint of bacon cheeseburgers.”
Ryan Patricks, You're Not Helping...

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