I'm not sure if I've said this before, but if I have you probably didn't read it anyhow or have forgotten by now, so I'll repeat it and you can either not read it (again?) or forget it again. Hey, it happens, it's the way the world rolls, or spins, or turns . . . or whatever the heck the world does.

Confession time: I'm a writer first and foremost. A novelist to be precise. Obviously! Duh! But there's a lotta writers out there who also strut themselves out on social media like a rockstar on the stage. Chuck Wendig being the most infamous. Love the guy. Extremely repetitive, and recycles the same ol' comedic formulas over, but we all got our crutches, right? Still, guy has a sky-high personality that rockets off the cyber-pages.

There are other writers out there, too, even indies, who can light up the 'net-stage with their pyrotechno-personas.

I hate them. Seriously. They all need to be wrapped in barbed wire, doused in honey, and thrown into the swamp where the skeeters can pick the flesh off their bones.

Then, just maybe, my online presence wouldn't be so inferior.

Can y’all believe FACEBOOK unpublished my account 'cause I hadn't been active in over 30 days? What kinda sick control-freak business model are those pricks striving for?

I'm giving a lot of consideration to going back to MySpace. Remember MySpace? Custom page layouts, music on your front page? Great way to find underground music BTW. And they weren't mean asshats like the Facebutt.

I wrote this to FB:

I apologize that I did not have the time or inclination to broadcast every aspect of my life, or recycle memes, or click Like on anyone else's shit in the last 30 days. I don't know what got into me.

Please accept this heartfelt screw you!

Sincerely,
A Nameless Facebook Expatriate seeking refuse in MySpace where I won't be judged and bullied.


Truth is, I really think I suck at this social media thing. But everyone keeps tellin' me that it's the future of online platforming and if you want be anybody in this digital age then you gotta dig the social media.

Hell, is giving my spiffy wrist watch for a smart phone I constantly have to charge and ignore telemarketers on not enough for this digital age?

This is exactly why I don't even like playing MMORPGs anymore -- too many people want to like interact with me. I remember when I could play Super Mario Bros 3 (go Koopa airships!) and nobody ever wanted to join my party. Me and Mario in a raccoon suit saved the day all by ourselves.

But . . . I'm going to try really, really hard to play nice and get myself a nice, nifty, shiny new blog and hope I can make some new friends.

Say, anybody want to play a Super Mario Bros. 3 marathon this weekend?