Things I have not done in a year:

1. Written a book.

2. Submitted a book.

3. Completed a book.

I have not written, submitted or completed a book in I don't know how long. I haven't admitted that out loud. Not to myself, not to my friends, my CPs or anyone else. Why? Because I'm a writer and if I don't write what am I? A loser?

Le sigh. It might not be nice and even if you weren't thinking it, I was. And no, not in a bad way. Well, in a bad way but not in a Lifetime Movie of the week my life is over kind of way, more of a self deprecating kind of way.

A writer who can't write. It sorta reminds me of a painter who can't paint or a sculptor who can't sculpt. Are they no longer a painter or sculptor because they may have a wee little block?

I know many people don't believe in blocks and maybe I shouldn't either. Maybe I should write (hehe get it, write instead of right) through it and keep going…

There was something my therapist said, (*rolls eyes* Don't pretend you're shocked I'm in therapy.) it was something along the lines of maybe I needed a reset or rebalance. And I can totally understand that. I think like many of us, I have setbacks and the doubt crows (coined by our very own Mrs. Maisey Yates! Hi Maisey! ) swoop in for the kill. *shrugs*

I'm finally getting to the point where I'm okay. I know I hold back a lot, I know I have a million and one issues (remember, therapy?) that makes it hard to write but time and time again I come back to it because it is what and who I am. So it's okay that I get writer's block, it's okay that I haven't written or finished anything in a year. It doesn't make me less than. This is my journey and I can't compare it to anyone's else because that's just stupid. And seriously, when you're driving if you allow yourself to be distracted there's always that possiblity of getting lost and veering into a ditch.

So…I gotta keep my eyes on my own road/journey. I may stop. I may stop at a rest stop or two but as long as I get back in that seat and behind that wheel everything will be just fine.