Zeus invited laughter-loving Aphrodite to join the Olympians; she was alone among the gods who were not the siblings or offspring of Zeus30 (a testimony to the power of love). She rose out of the foam surrounding the genitals of Ouranos floating in the fish-rich sea off of Cyprus, and from there she became known to the Hellenes as golden Aphrodite. The second- century CE travel guide writer Pausanias of Magnesia says the Assyrians were first to worship Aphrodite, and the Cypriots of Paphos second.31 On Olympos she was attended to by Eros and Desire.

Hephaistos married laughter-loving Aphrodite, but the sweet-garlanded goddess could not find it in her heart to love the god of crafts, he who hobbled on skinny legs that carried his monstrous bulk. She found the dashing war god Ares more to her liking, and they made love secretly in the Olympian house of Hephaistos. Ares gave her much and fouled the marriage and bed of Hephaistos. When their passionate embraces carried on beyond the dawn, all-seeing Helios (the sun) observed them at their sport and promptly told Hephaistos.

Seething in anger against manly Ares, the craftsman plotted his revenge. Inspired rage brought sweat to his brow as he stood by the billows and built a snare to trap the lovers in the act. When he had spun his treacherous device around the lordly posts of his massive bed, he started off to visit the Sintians in the strong citadel of Lemnos, which of all the places on earth was far dearest to him. Ares kept no blind watch and entered the house of the limping god Hephaistos lusting after the love of the sweet-garlanded Cyprian. She was well pleased to lie with him as he led her by the hand to the handsome bed. When their ardent desire was fulfilled, they found it impossible to rise out of bed. Then did the glorious strong-armed smith turn back before reaching Lemnos. He returned to Olympus and found them in their predicament.

Hephaistos cried out in his anger and anguish for the other Olympians to come see. Standing by the bed, his heart grieving, Hephaistos demanded back the bride’s price he had paid. Far-shooting Apollo turned to luck- bringing Hermes and asked if he would change places with Ares. Hermes said that he would without hesitation. The two gods laughed. Dark-haired Poseidon was not amused and promised that either Ares would make restitution or he would cover the debt himself. So Hephaistos released them. Aphrodite flew off in her dove-drawn golden chariot for Cyprus to refresh her spirit and let her embarrassment pass. Meanwhile, golden- throned Hera secured Hephaistos a new wife, the youngest of the richly dressed Kharities, Aglaia. Aglaia was the daughter of Zeus and Eurynome, the Oceanid who had once cared for wounded Hephaistos, and according to one myth, the one who had danced on the waters to create the universe.

To Ares and Aphrodite were born Terror and Fear, who pierced men’s shields and served as attendants to their violent father. (Sometimes Terror and Fear accompany their mother as well). Ares and Aphrodite also bore lovely Harmonia.