For the last six months I’ve been back to working a corporate job and LOVING it. I never thought I’d find a job working for the “man” while following my calling, but I have. I’m one of the lucky ones. I love what I do, I’m well paid to do it, and my work is rewarding.

But even so, I can fall prey to work stress zombie mode.

The last few weeks I’ve been sleeping as late as I can, getting up and stumbling to work,  zoning out on tv in the evenings, going to bed, getting up, going back to work. Rinse and repeat. I’ve started to feel like a zombie, carrying out the same meaningless actions over and over. I started to lose touch with my friends, my teenage son, and my joy in life. Like many of the clients I talk to each day, if someone had asked me what I was doing for fun, I’d say something like: “whaaaaaaa?”.

Zombie.

The other night, I actually dreamed that I was a zombie. Yep, raggedy clothes, rotting flesh, the whole deal. My biggest fear? That I would turn my son into a zombie too. I felt so sad that he might share my fate. Those feelings really made me stop and look at how I am spending my time. I like to think maybe this was Spirit showing me a really good reason to make a change — because the last thing I want for my child is to think that there is no meaning to life, or to the things that he does on a daily basis. Worse yet I don’t want him to grow up thinking that work stress zombie mode is normal

The dream made me realize I need to get back to my life — the life I have outside of work. I just finished a book and there are steps to take to get it published. There’s an unfinished watercolor of a beautiful sycamore tree, a piece of outdoor furniture I’m painting for my garden, new flute pieces to learn, learning French for next year’s trip to France, and a whole circle of interesting friends to reconnect with. All these things are just as important as my work.

I can’t tell you how many people I talk to every week in my job who are struggling with this “work/life balance” thing. Their job demands so much from them, and they have so little energy for anything else.

The result?

ZOMBIE.

So what to do? I started following my own advice and taking my life back. Whenever I talk to someone who’s struggling with this, my first questions are always:

“What are you doing to take care of yourself?”and
“What do you like to do that gives you pleasure?”

I started my rehabilitation by sending a few texts to arrange time to spend with friends. After a lovely Friday night dinner and a few glasses of wine with one of them I got inspired and rearranged my living room. Wow did that feel awesome! And suddenly I felt I could breathe again. Now those projects that I want to finish don’t seem so daunting and I’ve got a whole weekend stretching out in front of me to play with my art, hang out with my son, and even go look at art at a local street fair.

For now I’ve let go of my inner zombie so the vibrant and vital me can re-emerge. I’m reconnecting to my cat, my friends, and my garden. I’m remembering what it’s like to bloom.

 

I’m happy to report I’m feeling much better, NOT A ZOMBIE IN SIGHT (brains…..) wait, what was that?? LOL, just kidding.

All My Love,

Kypris