Dissecting a book description
I’m still struggling with my book description. Unfortunately, I was just as unhappy with the second attempt by the person I hired as I was with the first. So, I think this one is going to be up to me.
I thought that the easiest way to approach writing my book description would be find some descriptions that worked for me (ie made me want to buy the book) and take them apart. So, come journey with me into the deep, dark world of writing book descriptions:
A renegade rare-books dealer (our hero: adjective, noun) and a heiress-in-waiting (our heroine described in, essentially, the same way) must embark on a sham betrothal (this is a marriage of convenience romance: plot conflict) for the loftiest of literary aims– to prove that Shakespeare really was… Shakespeare (goal) (hook: readers love books, the mystery about Shakespeare is always fascinating).
John Dryden is on the trail of the greatest acquisition of his checkered career (a little more about the hero) – a play manuscript written in Shakespeare’s own hand. Between him and his prize is an obsessed librarian (here’s our antagonist: who she is and what her goal is) who wants to destroy it… and the heiress who can lead him to it, but only if he’s willing to risk his life, his freedom, and his loner’s heart. (what’s at stake)
In one short paragraph, we get everything we need: a catchy hook which describes our two protagonists in short, pithy ways, our hero’s goal and, in one word, a hint as to what sort of person he is, our antagonist and what she wants, and our heroine. It ends with another hook – what’s at risk for the hero if he is to attain his goal—and the romance. What more could a romance novel description need? Nothing! This is perfect!
Jackson Holt has carved out a life for himself as a private investigator (here’s our hero and what he does) in New Orleans (where the book is set), home of one of the largest underground supernatural (what sort of book this is: paranormal where the “other” is hidden from the rest of the world) populations in the United States. He and his partners have never met a case they couldn’t crack…until a local bar owner asks him to do a little digging on her newest hire (his goal: find out more about this new person in town).
New Orleans is the fourth destination in as many months for Mackenzie Brooks, a desperate woman on the run from a deranged stalker (our heroine and what her goal is). After all, any man who shows up on her doorstep claiming to be her destined lover has more than a few screws loose. But crazy doesn’t explain why Marcus always finds her, no matter how far she runs. (who our antagonist is and what he wants)
When her well-meaning boss puts a PI on her case (here’s where the hero and heroine meet and are forced to be together), Mackenzie comes face to face with the incredible, unbelievable truth: magic is real, and whatever spell has kept her hidden and separate from the paranormal world is rapidly deteriorating (heroine’s conflict).
With time running out, she has no choice but to trust Jackson as they struggle to uncover the truth of her past–and her destiny.(ending hook and urgency)
The Rogue You Know, Shana Galen
“Pure Galen: a lively pace, wonderful repartee, colorful dialogue, a marvelous cast of characters and…emotional depth with just enough humor to make you smile and cry.” —RT Book Reviews, Top Pick, 4 ½ stars for Earls Just Want to Have Fun (this one starts with a review to prove to us that this writer’s books are fabulous)
She’s beyond his reach… (teaser)
Gideon Harrow has spent his life in London’s dark underworld-and he wants out. A thief and a con, he plans one last heist to finally win his freedom (our hero, who he is and what his goal is). But when everything goes wrong, he finds himself at the tender mercies (his conflict) of one of Society’s most untouchable women-Lady Susanna Derring (who the heroine is from his point of view).
…and out of her depth. (teaser)
Susanna has spent her life in London’s glittering ton, under the thumb of a domineering mother-and she wants out (who the heroine is and what her goal is: deliberately repetitive from the hero’s description). When a wickedly charming rogue (hero from heroine’s pov) lands at her feet, she jumps at the chance to experience life before it’s too late. But as she descends into London’s underworld, she finds that nothing- not even Gideon-is as it seems (conflict). As excitement turns to danger, Susanna must decide what price she’s willing to pay…for the love of a reformed thief. (ending hook, what’s at stake for the heroine)
Praise for Love and Let Spy, an RT Book Reviews Top Pick:
“Splendid… an absolutely sublime love story… infused with beautiful, tender, and touching moments.” -Fresh Fiction
“An utterly wonderful historical romance.” -Books of Love (another review to remind us that this book is written by a good writer.)
So, here’s our formula:
One sentence beginning hook:
hero described in two or three words
heroine described in two or three words
maybe a hint of the plot and/or conflict
A little more about the hero, what he does, and what his goal is and possibly what his conflict is.
A little more about the heroine, what she does, her goal and conflict.
Worked into one of these paragraphs is the antagonist and what their goal is and an idea of what the setting or time period is, which will also tell us what sort of book this is: historical, paranormal, contemporary, mystery, etc.
One sentence ending hook.
After my description writer’s first attempt (based solely on the outline of my book), I did some deep digging into who my characters were and came up with brief descriptions of them (adjective, noun, and that’s it):
Laia is a social debutant.
Marcus is a tortured soul.
I then dug into what the deeper themes (see last week’s blog post) and meanings were in the book and based on that information, combined with the formula above, I came up with a book description:
She only wanted to save his soul. He needed to save her life.
Irrepressible Laia Grace, raised far from proper Regency society, is delighting in being amidst the ton. But when she naively falls foul of a notorious gossip, her father decides that she needs to grow up – and banishes her from society. If only he knew that he was sending her into much greater danger – and not from the ghost that is rumored to be in residence at the country manor!
Marcus, Lord Bolingbrook, is haunting his own home. Hidden in the secret passages and priest holes of the mansion, he is trying to cope with the tragedies in his past. But his gloom is dispelled by the unexpected arrival of a bright and enchanting companion, and his chivalry revived by the urgent need to rescue her from peril.
Will he risk his life – and his heart – to save her?
Tag line: Can a woman who lives for today save a man haunted by his past?
Phew! How do you write yours? Do you follow a formula? The same formula I came up with? How does it work for you?
