In exactly one week, my first novel,THE REMEDY,will be released into the world. Reviewers have already begun to share their thoughts on the book, calling it "a wholly satisfying meal" that proves "there's no such thing as a free lunch." I can only assume more food related puns are on their way, which can be expected when you write a story featuring my favorite kind of "monster" of the horror genre:Cannibals!Though zombies are a close second when it comes to my personal list of top horror baddies, for my money, cannibals are scarier than their undead counterparts. Both groups devour humans, but zombies (for the most part) are defined by their lack of intelligence and mobility. Watch any episode ofThe Walking Deadfor an example of how easy it is to out maneuver and out-think the typical "walker." Granted, when zombies move in hordes (as they almost always do) they become far more frightening, as well as serving as a great metaphor for mindless human behavior and herd mentality (i.e.Dawn of the Dead.) As many have said before me, "What makes zombies scary is that they are us."Cannibals, however, do not need to be represented so metaphorically. They LITERALLY are human beings. And humans come with varying degrees of intelligence, sympathy, aggression, and a whole bunch of other qualities that make them far more interesting...and far more dangerous. The zombie and the cannibal have the same goal/appetite, but the latter will not be so easily distracted by a loud noise. They will continue their pursuit, using countless methods that go far beyond a zombie's determined lurch: weapons, traps, even a disarming smile...And God help you if the cannibal is smarter than you. *cough*Hannibal!*cough*So whether you're new to cannibal stories or a "seasoned" veteran (har har), check out this list of some of my favorite fictional flesh eaters. You may note I've limited this list to films and TV shows, but let's face it: YouTube clips make for better blog posts. Besides, in one week you'll have all the literary cannibals you can stomach...TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (1974)The first film is also the most obvious.  Setting the precedent for all insane, cannibal family movies to follow, the dinner scene in TCM will make your dysfunctional brood look like the Danny Tanner and his bunch.  Even if your grandpa is too old and senile to figure out how to use the flash on a camera…at least he doesn’t suck blood out of your finger.MOTEL HELL (1980)As the tagline of this movie says, “It takes all kinds of critters to make Farmer Vincent’s fritters!”  And I bet you can guess which kind.  Interestingly enough, the motel of the film’s title has very little to do with the plot at all.  More importantly is the garden behind the hotel that holds the secret to Farmer Vincent’s delicious meat.  But I thought gardens were for vegetables? Hmm...PARENTS (1989)Even if your Mom isn’t the best cook in the world, just be thankful she won’t be serving “leftovers” for thanksgiving dinner.  If your dreading going home for the holidays, pop a copy of Parents into your DVD player and suddenly your folks won’t be looking so bad compared to Randy Quaid and Mary Beth Hurt.  I can’t promise they’ll be as funny however, as Quaid is priceless in this campy gem.X-FILES , SEASON 2, EPISODE 24, "OUR TOWN" (1994)Far from the best episode of one of the best TV shows ever put on television, "Our Town" still serves as a solid addition to the X-Files canon. When Mulder and Scully come to a small town in Arkansas to investigate the disappearance of a health inspector, they stumble into a cannibalistic conspiracy involving a chicken processing plant. If nothing else, this episode will make you think twice about you're really eating when you order McNuggets. (Not like you weren't already.)RAVENOUS (1999)Dark, bloody, and surprisingly funny, Ravenous has it all.  This film’s garnered quite a cult following since its release 16 years ago, attracting audiences of all kinds with its ghastly charm.  If you haven’t ever seen it, go watch this movie right now. I bet you anything the next time your mother tries to break up a fight between you and your brother at the dinner table, you’ll yell: HE WAS LICKING ME!MASTERS OF HORROR, SEASON 2, EPISODE 12, "THE WASHINGTONIANS" (2007)Based on a short story by Bentley Little, one of the best horror fiction authors of all time, The Washingtonians is an hour long made-for-TV movie overflowing with originality. In the same way that writers must approach zombies in new ways to keep them "fresh" (har har), those who take on cannibals face the same challenge. By tossing the founding fathers into therecipe, Little weaves a story that is equal parts fun and hard to forget. Though George Washington is credited for saying, "I cannot tell a lie," perhaps we've beenfedlies for a very long time.FEAR ITSELF, SEASON 1, EPISODE 8, "SKIN & BONES" (2008)After "Masters of Horror" was cancelled, it was given a new title for its not-quite-third season. Now on a different network, "Fear Itself" brought just as many scares as its predecessor. Arguably one the best episodes,Skin & Bonesmade use of the Wendigo legend, much like the previously mentionedRavenous.The make-up effects of this one are particularly impressive, but they do not compare to the emotional horror of the story. Like Jack Torrence ofThe Shining, the monster here is both a loving husband and father...or at least he was.WE ARE WHAT WE ARE (2013)Though I find most American remakes of foreign films to be unnecessary at best,We Are What We Areis an exception, mostly due to the strong performances by its lead actors, including the always enjoyable Michael Parks. Far quieter than the rest of the films and episodes on this list,We Are...is still disturbing in its own subtler way. Which isn't to say it doesn't contain scenes of physical violence--they are just outweighed by thepsychologicalaspects. Every teenager goes through that period when he/she realizes they have different views or opinions than their parents. But very few, I imagine, have to come to terms with how different their diets are as well.