For a long time, I wrote in secret. No, I don't mean that no one knew I was writing ... It seemed like everyone knew I wrote, all the time. I used to have composition notebooks with the marble covers, and I would write anything from short stories to poems, from random paragraphs to novels. I wrote so much, but I was so terrified of sharing my writing with others. I was especially afraid of sharing my writing with those closest to me; I almost felt that those people would be obligated to say good things about it. There's the problem with loved ones: you're always afraid that they won't feel comfortable giving you constructive criticism. Maybe you don't know what I'm talking about. Maybe your friends and family are open with you, completely honest in the nicest way possible, and you have nothing to fear.

I don't try to make it a secret that I have anxiety. It's debilitating and sometimes it's all I can do to just put my head in my hands and cry. Because of my anxiety, I'm an over-thinker. I constantly wonder at double meaning behind other people's words, I constantly worry about the words that I say or even don't say. I fear loss, not death, but thinking that I am not good enough for my friends to stick around through my bad times. How does any of this translate to a fear of writing? I'll tell you how ....

Living with anxiety is a big deal. Putting yourself out there is an even bigger deal. Writing, even if it is fiction, and publishing, is scary for someone who lives with anxiety. I decided not to let my fear control me, because I am decidedly not my anxiety. I remembered that I don't like every book that I read, so my books won't be everyone's cup of tea and that is fine. So I wrote, and this time, I knew I was going to publish it. Writing and reading are my escapes from this world, my anxiety, and a journey that I can take, not alone, but with the friends that live inside those pages.

I say, don't live in the dark cocoon of your fear. Don't let it become who you are, don't let it define you. If you love writing, music, photography, painting, or whatever, then do your art and let the world see it. What you put out into the world may just be the gift one person was looking for.