I just became an ordained minister.
Now, when I say: "Mmmmmm, I love these barbecue chips!"
And my wife replies all snarky-like: "Well, then why don't you marry them?" I can get up, and perform the ceremony right there.
"By the power vested in me by the online ordination thingy-ma-bob, I now pronounce you man and chips. You may eat the bride."