I’m not keen on cats. Sorry, I just can’t get on with them.

Obviously I don’t actively dislike any animal – all living creatures deserve their place in their world – but cats and I are never going to be friends.

I’m sure they’re not keen on me either, and that’s probably where the realisation that I will never be a ‘cat person’ started.

Because honestly, cats don’t like us, you, me or anyone.

They barely tolerate humans and while some may find that attractiv...