Twenty weeks after the first day of the second new year

Author has been thinking. She keeps telling you that you should continue on the path you’ve set out for yourself no matter what happens around you, that you shouldn’t stray from the way to your goals, that you must keep your eye on your dreams and believe that their fulfillment is on the horizon no matter what you encounter on the way. Well, she wants you to know that she isn’t saying this lightly. She isn’t saying, “Whatever happened or is happening to you, get over it”. She isn’t suggesting that your life is easier than others’ and that you therefore have no right to worry, doubt your ability to succeed, or complain. Nor is she undermining the challenges you face in your everyday life and in trying to fulfill your dreams.

And she hopes you don’t, either. In this era of exposure to the lives of so many, you’ve probably encountered all kinds of stories, all kinds of circumstances that are the realities of your peers. You might envy those you deem to have lives better than yours, and look with astonishment at the troubles of yet others and think, “What right do I have to complain, look at the difficulties they encounter.” But that’s just the thing. Comparing your troubles to others’ doesn’t make much sense. We are, Author supposes, as able to endure difficulties as the challenges we’ve faced in our lives. As if, say, the reference line of our ability to deal with what happens to us rises the more challenges we encounter. If your life has been without trouble—and Author hopes it has been—then what you might perceive as difficult might be perceived as easy to deal with by someone who has been through a harsher existence, and who is used to more difficulties or more severe ones. What we go through strengthen us. Toughens us is perhaps more accurate. It certainly makes us more experienced, more knowledgeable of our reactions and more knowing of the steps we could possibly take next. And yet, if you’ve had it easy, or easier than others whose stories you encounter, don’t think you couldn’t possibly be as strong as them: you never know what you will find within you as you come up against new challenges. Don’t think you can’t do. Never ever underestimate yourself. We are able to scale unimaginable hurdles, in times of need we find in ourselves strength we never knew existed. Especially when we are driven by hope, by the stubbornness that makes us takes the next step toward fulfilling our dreams, by the conviction that we can do what we have set for ourselves. And you know what, if you had it easy, or easier than others, don’t think you don’t deserve the success you want. Of course you do.

Alternatively, you shouldn’t think that you’ve been through too much to succeed. Having had a difficult life or currently living in harsh circumstances shouldn’t mean you can’t fulfill your dreams. People manage to get out of crushing lives. They manage to turn their lives around. You can, too. Remember that when good comes, bad takes a back seat to it.

Remember that a dream come true and the knowledge that yes, you made it, can give you a whole lot of strength, a whole lot of energy, a boost to the hope for a good life.

And so this is what Author and Sister suggest this week: Don’t think that others can’t understand whatever it is you might be going through. Don’t isolate yourself. Share what you’re going through with loved ones and peers, and there will be those who will understand, empathize, have a kind word or a helpful advice, even if their lives are different from yours. Don’t think, “I can’t talk to them, how dare I speak when their troubles are so much bigger than mine.” But also don’t think, “I can’t speak to them, they’ve had it easy, their lives are so different from mine, they won’t understand.” You can never know what’s in the life of another. And whatever your plight is, the plight of others doesn’t make yours less real, less concerning, and less worthy of sympathy. And most important: whatever obstacles you face on your path to your dreams, don’t disregard them or take them too lightly, but don’t make them into unscalable walls, either. Deal with them, and don’t let anything stop you on your way to your dreams.