I close my eyes
And the darkness there
Embraces me like a wayward lover.
The breeze against my flesh
Seems to soothe me into my fate.

It's too late... it whispers.

The rocks beneath my bare feet
Prick uncomfortably,
For they know I am just a visitor,
Biding my time and wasting all I have
Left with a future step.

The rocks know what it's like to have a hard life.
They should be empathetic.
Or, at least, sympathetic.

"This is pathetic," I whisper to the sky.

I know I can't fly,
But it has never been my intention.

Did I mention I have a fear of heights?

It's crazy, right? I'm stalling instead of falling.
This view is enthralling,
And the thought of dying a bit terrifying.
Darkness? Heaven? Hell?

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention.
I'm on the edge of sanity.
That's the cliff's name.
Sanity.

My toes hang over, feeling the absence of stability,
But this is thrilling even though it ends in my killing.

My arms open wide at the wind's insistence.
She's quite persistent.
The rocks prod me
And the world tilts.

No, that's just me.
The world is the same,
But I'm to blame--not the world-- for falling
And flipping myself upside down.

And before I hit the ground,
I just want to say...
My, it truly is a beautiful day.





Suicide. It never makes sense to anyone but the suicidal. Being in such a dark state of mind makes it seem okay; makes it seem like an adventure to an end.

Not romanticized, just accepted fate.

Being an outside perspective makes death at someone's own hand seem sudden. It confuses people because, to them, it is just an ordinary day.
To them, it is selfish and ungrateful. To them, suicide is blind.

Suicide is not about lack of gratitude.
It's not about blindness to the beautiful things in life.
It's about nothing other than the suicidal.

Their worlds have been turned upside down after they have been balancing for far too long, trying to fight the mental demons looming in every corner, clawing at their host whenever the opportunity arises.

Am I condoning it? Of course not. I have been touched by the suicide of a loved one and I have my own demons. It is painful.

I am, however, wanting to help others understand what goes through the minds of those who are suicidal. So many people think it is selfish. So many think it is impossible to think about. So many think it is so simple to get help; to see the brighter side.

It's not.

It's tough as hell when you think everything and everyone would be better without you. It is not easy to just turn off the bad thoughts.

So, I ask you to pay attention to your loved ones. To go in with an open mind and love if they open up to you about suicidal thoughts. Remember it isn't about you. It's not about being ungrateful or selfish.

It is solely about their pain and helping them through it.

Thank you.