It doesn't even feel like Halloween. And he said the meanest things. They still sting. Like cut glass in my eyes. Struggling. Cut glass would hurt a lot more than a sting if it was stuck in your eyes. It's more like being disemboweled. He sort of did that to my heart. Disemhearted. Is that a word? It is now. Is there anything worse? There isn't now. And autumn brings no relief. And I just wanna be a stamp collector. I'm so tired and I hate these sleepless nights. I just want to feel numb again or at least to enjoy Halloween. And not to have to think up new words to describe the hollow for where my heart used to be.

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