In a fluke turn of events, all recording devices in the world have stopped working. The disruption has caused a commotion world-wide, but we are assured it won’t be fixed until Sunday. The earliest it could be fixed is Saturday night. Around 9:30. Definitely no earlier.

As a result, nothing can be recorded and shared with anyone. Nothing. It’s a travesty.

And in case anyone is wondering, this also includes alien equipment. So if anyone was planning to break into Area 51 and take the ship – that Jeff Goldblum painstakingly prepared to infect with a virus uploaded from an Apple PC – and use that ship to record anything. Well, it wouldn’t work.

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