Writing is rewriting. When I lay down my first draft I’m basically telling myself the story and meeting the characters. Last time I told you what I focus on during that first pass. I point my brain in a very different direction when I get down to revising that draft. At this point I’m not learning the story I’m working to improve it. This is not editing. It’s too soon for me to worry about grammar and spelling. At this point I’m looking at the characters, the plot, the setting and if there is one, the theme.
I focus on the descriptions, all of which are written from the perspective of the point of view character. I write in third person, but it is close third person. That means that all of my prose needs to show what that point of view character sees, hears, feels, smells and tastes. Anytime the descripts don’t fit that bill I’ve wandered into omniscient view or worse, I’m head hopping.Next I focus on the actual data. Every story is filled with relationships, character backstory, details about the setting, the history, the motivations. During the rewrite I’m looking at how my prose delivers that information. Everything needs to flow smoothly with no info dumps. And to maintain the point of view, all that data has to be presented in the point of view character’s voice, and it has to all be within his reasonable knowledge.
In revision I also re-examine the action. Not just the violent conflicts, but every character’s body language and casual movements. I want my reader to be able to clearly visualize all of the mannerisms. That is as important as being able to visualize the fight scenes. And each character’s action have to fit that character, without overdoing it (how many times did she twist that lock of hair?) Too many of those little movements can actually mess with the pace.
I also look closely at the dialog. Every word out of a character’s mouth should serve a purpose, either to promote the plot or deepen character development. And conversations should either reveal or impact the relationship between the characters talking. And I remind myself that each character has an individual voice.  This includes inner dialog. It has to ring true to their voice and be true to that character’s emotional stakes.
I focus on a different set of elements when I get down to the editing phase, but that’s for next time.