Wizards are powerful, it’s well known. Gandalf, Voldemort, and even Darth Vader. They are a common staple of fantasy. They usually have an abundance of knowledge to go along with their power. Yet, there are never any wizard armies in fantasy? (Unless you consider Dumbledore’s Army—which I don’t really do).

Is there something about the profession that makes them strictly introverted, loners?

Or maybe they don’t like to march side-by-side. They like to spend too much time with their books, and sometimes that can lead to a dismissal of physical pursuits. They have to study long and hard, after all, to learn all of those spells. Who has time for P.T.?

Maybe, soldiers are just afraid to spend time around a one-person nuke. I would be. But they’re wizards, shouldn’t they like spending time with one another?

Or maybe if too many wizards are brought together, the mana they use to cast their spells would interfere with each other. (But I don’t think that’s true).

Could it be they take orders about as well as a barrel of wet cats?

“Private, take that hill.”

Now, the Drill Sergeant’s a frog. Ribbit!

But there must be something about their character, or wizardry in general, that precludes them from signing up for their country.

It seems like the most sensible thing to do. Think how unstoppable a wizard army would be, plus you wouldn’t have to spend all that money on swords and armor or bullets and guns. Do you see how awesome a wizard army could be?

Wizard armies would rock. They would rule. They’d leave other armies with no clue what to do.

But they don’t exist, they never have, kinda like Big Foot doing improv.

Maybe it’s just an impossible dream, to see a wizard army out in the field. But maybe, just maybe, I’ll write that story someday—but it won’t be anytime soon--I still have too much Sword and Sorcery I need to consume.

What do you think about this subject? Why are there not more wizard armies in fantasy?