Oh, January, the magical time of year that inspires change—when you vow to get six-pack abs before pool season, you promise to stop binge-drinking, and you set a goal to read more books because some guy on the internet said that reading is good for you. You start the year with so much hope and optimism, ready to become the person you’ve always wanted to be—but then life happens. You can’t find parking because the gym is overcrowded, you can’t say no to the birthday girl at bottomless mimosa...