“Is there a term for having sex when there is no love involved?” She asked stirring her coffee.
Usually he found her presence in his house unwelcome. He had learned to tolerate her because of his wife. She seemed to enjoy her company and her incessant prying. She was a walking-talking tabloid.
But today her question piqued his curiosity. He pretended to be absorbed in his newspaper, while the women carried on with their conversation. They were used to ignoring his presence anyway.
“Pleasure?” His wife replied. “Or maybe lust is more appropriate. Although there is pleasure in lust.”
“No not that kind.” She looked up from her coffee. She stared into this distance as if gathering her thoughts and then looked back into her cup. “Maybe I am asking the wrong question.” She resumed stirring the coffee. “Is there a term when there is love but… no lust?” She looked up. Her eyes pleading to be understood.
“A relationship with love but no sex?” His wife leaned back in her chair and thought about it. “It exists. Platonic relationships. I do believe opposite sexes can be friends. That two people from different genders can care very deeply about each other and still be friends.”
She sighed heavily as if disappointed by the answer. “No. Not friendship. Marriage.”
“Can two people be married and never make love?” His wife sounded a little shocked but got it rapidly under control. “It happens, I guess.” She shrugged.
“Not make love,” she said so softly that he had to strain his hears to latch on to her next words. “Have sex.”
“Make love. Have sex. Same difference.” His wife waved her hands in the air trying to explain her point. “When two people in love have sex, they are making love.”
“Are they?” She questioned as she resumed her stirring. Her focus once again on the swirling brown-black liquid in her cup. “What if two people are in love and one wants to have sex and the other doesn’t,” He noticed how she refrained from using the work ‘make love’.
“The act of sex has to be consensual.” His wife replied with finality to her voice. This was non-negotiable.
“What if it is not?” She looked up. A faint glimmer of hope danced in her eyes. As if this conversation was finally going where she wanted it to. “What if one person wants to have sex and the other person does not want to, but they still end up having sex every night.”
“Then its rape.” His wife replied in a soft voice.
“Now what if the two of them very much in love, were married?” She challenged.
His wife thought about it. “It is still rape.” She shook her head.
Only the rhythmic clinking of the spoon stirred the silence that followed.
“What if the man in the marriage felt this way,” he asked as he folded his newspaper. “Is it still rape?”