Eighty percent of success is showing up.

Woody Allen

Many of us decide to show up in our everyday lives even on days when it’s extremely hard to get out of bed. Sometimes it’s all we can do. But what if instead of just showing up, we showed up better for ourselves?

Showing up is a default setting but showing up better is hard. What I mean by showing up better for ourselves is bringing more focus to our thoughts, words, and actions especially when it matters the most. 

The times when you’ve stepped away in the past knowing you should have instead stepped forward. It’s easy to hold back parts of our true selves.

The reasons why we decide to reveal glimpses or versions of ourselves vary from fear of what people will think to the uncertainty of the outcome if we did take a bolder step. Let’s take a look at what showing up better may look like.

Taking more space than you might feel comfortable with

You are a strong, incredible, and multi-faceted human being. You are here to be all you can be to savor in the space that you created and that you can embrace with grace.

For example, we’ve all been in work meetings where a question is asked to the larger group and the room sits silently because no one wants to be the first to respond and be opened to feeling judged because it wasn’t the right response.

So we stay silent, waiting for someone else to take the fall. But many times it’s not a fall at all but a momentous release of holding back.

Showing up better may look like stepping up to the plate to be the first to offer your opinion because you trust in your own value. The truth is, you may get it right sometimes and other times not say right but that’s how we learn and grow.

A personal example could be when you’re with your group of friends and showing up means hanging out, relaxing, and enjoying each other’s company. Each of you takes your turn to share updates, stories, and thoughts.

Some of us don’t like attention, even if it’s with our close group of friends so when it is our turn, we rush through it giving the short and sweet version.

I’ve been known to give the 10,000 feet view of a story with little or no details. Showing up better may look like being vulnerable to share more of your personal story to build stronger connections based on our struggles and triumphs of life lessons. It may mean revealing parts of you that may not have seen much light but are the parts that may need it the most. 

Getting more clarity than you may be ready for

Some of the hardest interactions we have with other people are the ones we leave unsure of either how we feel about someone or unsure of how the other person feels. This holds true whether in a personal or a work relationship.

Again, if you’re like me, you might ruminate the interaction over and over in your head, trying to analyze the tiniest of details to gain more understanding. 

Even before leaving the conversation, you may have wanted to say something or ask a question but you didn’t. You believe you would have felt so much better if you showed up better at that moment. Now, instead, you’re left with time for your busy mind to overanalyze and replay the moments.

Showing up better may be finding the best way to share your thoughts and questions as soon as possible instead of holding them in. The more time you hold them in, the harder it gets to let them out.

You may not receive the reaction you want or desire but at least you have greater clarity on the situation. Then, you can make a more informed decision around your next step. 

Being the one to lead the way instead of waiting for someone else to

There’s no doubt, it’s easy to fall into the crowd and go wherever everyone else is going. It’s easy because it takes little or no effort to follow a path that has already been carved right in front of you.

As long as you don’t take a disastrous fall, you’ll be fine. Whatever life brings our way is what we accept as ours.

Showing up better is securing the treasures awaiting those who go off the beaten trail where undiscovered gems still await. Once you start showing up better, better things fall into your path to reaffirm your direction. 

It’s difficult to stand out from the crowd especially for someone who doesn’t like to lead. But standing out from the crowd is the one way to ensure you don’t get lost in it.

You may have to remind yourself over and over why you’re taking on a different path than everyone else like I have many times.

These reminders will serve you in times when you wonder why sometimes it feels so hard to the point where you just want to give up. There’s a calling inside you that can’t be quieted nor should it be.

You have to honor the voice inside you to take the lead in creating all that you desire and deserve.

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