So much death
It’s unfair really, because the silence hurts
It’s final
But what hurts more is the noise that comes after
The constant cycle
Now I’m unfeeling because I refuse to tune into the carnage
I’m selfish because I choose my sanity over the grief
Giving in steals more than it offers
So much control
Too much dependency
It’s heavy and I’m drowning
So yes, I don’t react
But I feel
I see
I bleed
I grieve
And still, the deed is done

-immortality my darlin
Written July 15, 2020