Book Review
Rites to a Good Life: Everyday Rituals of Healing and Transformation – Frederick Marx
(Warrior Films, 2020.)
Frederick Marx, the author of Rites to a Good Life: Everyday Rituals of Healing and Transformation, asked if I would be interested in reviewing his new book about the importance of rites of passage for men and boys in the modern – primarily USA – world. Being neither a man nor an American, I naturally said yes – and I am so glad I did.
This is a tremendously important book which examines what some may perceive as a crisis in masculinity in the developed world. It discusses the necessity of mentoring our young through the storms of adolescence to maturity and acceptance of their roles in the world through rites of passage at various life stages, each one adding to the stature and standing of the initiate until manhood is reached. Marx’s book discusses matters from the cultural context of the USA and contrasts this with world-wide rites of passage traditions from allegedly less developed communities; highlighting the benefits mentorship of teenagers confers on the cohesion of societies as a whole.
The book focuses on male experience and this is an absolute joy to read, given how easily young men can be overlooked. It acknowledges the Rites of Passage conferred by members of religious groups, for example. However, the book is not about religion and the quiet strength at the heart of the book is illustrated by these quotations:
In villages and cultures (…) it was common to be taught why you were here, what your purpose was, and how best you could contribute to the community.
Boys raised on farms or learning crafts were apprenticed by their fathers and other men. While they were taught practical and professional skills, they were also taught what it is to be a man, what civilised behaviour is – the rights and responsibilities of adulthood.
The author lays out his own path and shares the wisdom of those who mentored him. The book is not an easy read in the sense that it can be dashed off in one sitting. Indeed, to do so would mean that much of the wisdom in this work would be lost. It is a book to read slowly, to savour and to think about before accompanying the author on the next stage of the journey.
Rites of Passage is truly a remarkable book. The ideas and questions it contains are urgent ones for today when so many young men can appear lost and directionless at times. However, Marx does not just stir this pot and run, leaving the reader wondering, “What next?” Resources are provided in the appendix to enable readers to follow through on the ideas by listing established men’s groups / websites for further information and sources of help. We surely owe it to our male children to be the adults they need to help them become whole and healthy men.
This book is not for the faint-hearted but it is indeed a book for those whose hearts are stout.
Rites to a Good Life: Everyday Rituals of Healing and Transformation – Frederick Marx
(Warrior Films, 2020.)
